by Jean Oram
“Todd Haber’s room, please.”
“You are…?”
“His girlfriend.”
The man gave her an odd look, then checked his computer. While he searched and tapped she took in the lobby. It was gorgeous, with bellmen and heat that worked. Potted palms, brass, and shiny marble everywhere. The company sure knew how to put up their employees. No wonder Todd didn’t mind traveling too much.
As the heat worked its way into her body she slowly began to feel more human.
“We have no Todd Haber.”
“H-A-B-E-R. One B.”
He shook his head, eyes still on the monitor.
“He’s with Elixir Marketing.”
“Yes, ma’am. He has checked out.”
“Checked out?” She had been acting casual, as though she wasn’t desperate to get Todd’s room number, but now she swung around to face the man, hands flat on the counter. “What do you mean?”
“He is no longer staying at the hotel.”
“Where did he go?”
“I do not know, Miss.”
Todd could be anywhere in the city, if not here. She unfolded the itinerary. There were meeting times and dates, but nothing scheduled for another day or two. The page blurred and she leaned against the counter, feeling sapped.
“Are you all right?”
“Fine. Thank you.”
She didn’t know where to go from here. She hadn’t planned on him not being at the hotel.
She stepped back from the counter to think. When she traveled with Todd she always took care of the details, from finding them temporary jobs to carrying nonperishable snacks. He found the adventure; she took care of the things that would keep them out of trouble.
She planned because she was scared. Planned because it was an easy way to look confident and in charge. But this time she hadn’t planned anything other than getting to Todd. A man who wasn’t here.
Suddenly, her legs couldn’t hold her any longer and she sagged to the floor.
Immediately, bellmen hoisted her up, gripping her under her arms. “Miss, you can’t sit here.”
Her head lolled. It was too difficult to stay upright.
They placed her in a high-backed chair and set a glass of ice water before her. She hesitated, trying to recall if their drinking water was clean and safe.
She didn’t know.
* * *
Nicola woke up in a beautiful hotel room, to find a man with salt-and-pepper hair leaning over her.
“Are you all right, my dear?”
“Yes.” She bolted upright.
When traveling, always answer yes. Don’t show weakness, that you’re lost or vulnerable. Todd had taught her that. Act as if it’s all good, then find somewhere safe to pull yourself together and come up with a new plan of action to get yourself out of there.
She was in a hotel. Mongolia. Todd was missing. Gone. Left. She was here alone. With a stranger who was sitting too close.
“Easy does it.” The man had a British accent, hesitant English. With gentle hands he encouraged her to lie down again. “Your travels overcame you. Dehydration possibly.” He fetched a glass of water from the bedside table, but she waved it off.
“Pregnant.”
He gave her a concerned look. “Where is your travel party?”
“He vacated.”
“I will find him, yes?”
“Yes, please.” She drifted off to sleep, waking later in the dimly lit room. Why was she needing so much sleep? Was something wrong? She sat up and placed a hand against her belly. How long before she’d be able to feel the baby kick? Had she endangered it by traveling?
It was stupid to have come this far. Stupid to have spent the money. Stupid not to have planned better.
She needed to start thinking about the baby, not herself.
She checked the room to ensure she was alone, then called the front desk. The receptionist informed her she should use the suite—gratis—until she was feeling better.
She drank a bottle of water and ate a packaged granola bar from the bottom of her purse. Then she threw the dead bolt and latch on the door, gave herself a quick sponge bath and changed into the outfit she’d purchased on her way to the airport back home. She already felt fresher, more alive.
Shortly afterward, the doctor returned.
“Did you find him?” she asked, opening the door in answer to his gentle knock.
He shook his head. “You must rest.”
He came into the room and opened his medical bag. He shook out two tablets from a bottle, handing them to her, then went to the bathroom and returned with a glass of tap water. “You take these.”
“What are they?” The pills were gray and large.
“Iron.”
She looked at them for a long moment, then at the drinking water. Pills. Possibly contaminated water. Foreign country. Woman alone.
She handed them back to him. “I can’t. I’m sorry.”
“It will make you feel better. Iron is important. This is why you are tired.”
“I can’t,” she repeated. “I need to go. But thank you.” She snatched up her bag and hurried out of the room. She could take iron supplements when she got home, but right now she needed to get herself someplace where she could be the one in charge. Where she could create a game plan.
On her way out, she stopped at the front desk. “I need to pay for my room.”
The man gave her a smile so sweet his eyes crinkled. “A friend of Elixir Marketing is a friend of ours. The room and the care are on the house. Simply consider staying with us for your next vacation.”
“Wow. Thank you.” She paused as the kindness warmed her heart. “I really appreciate it.”
“The room is yours until tomorrow morning.”
“Thank you, but I won’t be needing it.”
She’d slept through her first day in Mongolia, decreasing her chances of finding Todd before her return flight tomorrow night. The good news was that the work week had started back home and she could probably reach someone at Todd’s office to get a heads-up on his new location.
She stepped away from the desk, picking up her cell phone. She stared at it. She didn’t have an international plan, and a phone call could easily cost her an unrealistic sum.
She turned back to the desk. “May I use your phone if I use a credit card?”
The man placed a rotary phone on the counter, turning it to face her. She smiled and dialed an operator, connecting her way across the world to Todd’s receptionist.
“Hello, this is Nicola Samuels. Todd’s, um, girlfriend.”
“Nicola!”
“I was wondering if I could get Todd’s new itinerary. They’re saying he’s not at the hotel.”
“Didn’t you hear?” the woman asked in a low, surprised voice.
Nicola clutched the hotel counter, worried she was going to be sitting on the floor again like when she’d arrived. “Hear what?”
“Todd quit. He’s coming home.”
“He what?”
The world began spinning. She gave a shaky laugh of disbelief. She’d traveled to the middle of nowhere, barely keeping it together, and the man she was chasing had done a one-eighty and was heading home again?
“When?” she asked.
“He sent his resignation email over the weekend so I assume he’s well on his way home already.”
Nicola wanted to scream at the timing. Instead, she politely said goodbye and returned the phone before stomping out onto the street and hailing a cab with more gusto than was necessary.
She needed food. And she needed a flight out of here. ASAP.
What kind of dimwitted fool was she, coming all this way? Hadn’t he sensed she was here? And who came all this way and then deserted his job? What on earth was wrong with that man? And why couldn’t the Fates ever seem to give her a break?
In the airport she purchased a banana from a stand, along with a bottle of water and a sandwich. She went to the ticket desk, angrily ch
omping on her banana. Men gave her a wide berth, one of them going so far as to cup his hands protectively in front of his family jewels. She resisted the urge to lunge at him, growling.
Realizing the ridiculousness of it all, and afraid she was going to break out giggling, she turned away, certain she was losing her mind, piece by piece. She lined up at the airline counter, jiggling her foot impatiently. She needed to go home, be somewhere safe, somewhere she could take her and her baby’s health for granted.
She changed her return ticket to the next available flight and went to wait at the gate. There weren’t many flights heading her way, but she’d lucked out and had only three hours to kill before the first leg.
Mindlessly munching on her sandwich, she paced in front of the windows, barely noticing the driving snowflakes that had begun pummeling the planes outside. On the first few trips she’d taken with Todd she’d stared at the aircraft in wonder, unbelievably excited to be getting on one and going somewhere new.
She tossed out her sandwich wrapper, feeling better after her meal. As she turned to resume her pacing, placing her coat on a nearby chair, she thought she heard someone call her name. Was she imagining things again? Looking up, she scanned the crowd, seeking the owner of the male voice. Was it someone she’d met while traveling the world with Todd?
Her breath caught as her gaze connected with a shocked looking man. The very man she’d come for. He blinked at her as though she couldn’t possibly be real.
It was Todd.
Chapter 10
Todd had her in his arms so fast she didn’t have time to think about anything other than how overjoyed she was to have found him.
Suddenly everything felt okay. She felt safe. Happy.
He pressed his lips against her neck, inhaling her, acting as though she was just as important to him as he was to her. She held on tight, absorbed in the knowledge that he loved her. She mattered.
“I thought I was doing the right thing, letting you go,” he said, “but I got here and it all felt so wrong.” He continued to hold her, rocking them gently, one hand cupping her head, his cheek resting on top of it. “I want to spend Christmas with you.”
He still wanted her! The relief was so strong it nearly knocked her over.
“For the record, I truly hate that Whitney Houston song.”
He laughed with a shakiness she knew wasn’t just mirth as he continued to hold her tight.
“You don’t need to say it,” he said. “I get it. The song sucks and it was a selfish grand gesture, playing that song. Like you said, if you love someone, you stay and work it out. I’m a you-know-what and you should probably knee me in the nuts for being so insensitive.”
“Then why did you request it?” she asked, tipping her head back to look at him.
He loosened his grip, taking a half step back. “Because I love you, Nic. I always have. Always will. And I want to do what’s best for you. I want to put your needs first and the song felt like a good way to express the things I haven’t had a chance to say.” He clutched her hands, a desperate look in his eyes. “I want to be the man who can give you the life you so rightly deserve—even if that means walking away. I’m here because I thought I could earn enough to set you and the baby up for a better life. A better life without me.” His brow wrinkled with pain. “But I can’t do it, Nic. I’m not strong enough to walk away from you. I need you. I love you.”
Her eyes filled with tears, her throat so tight she couldn’t speak.
“I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to be what you need. Every time I try…we…”
She squeezed his hands. “I know, and I’m sorry I pushed you away.”
“I don’t know how to be a dad. I don’t know how to be solid like you are. I’ll forget to feed the baby. I don’t know which foods it can eat.” He let out a shaky breath. “I don’t know how to do this.”
“I don’t either. And I stress out and organize everything beyond reason.” She tugged at his shirt. “But together? We can do this. We fit. We complement. We can make it all work. What I lack, you have.” She pulled him closer. “I need you.”
He held her against him again, his cheek resting on her head. His voice was shaky with relief and fear when he said, “I’m not ready for this.”
“Neither am I,” she whispered, tears wetting her eyes. “But I can’t do it alone, Todd. I need you. You. Nobody else. You’re the only one and I came here for you. To tell you that.”
He pulled back to look at her. “What if I screw this up?”
“You will. And so will I. But I promise to never give up.”
He nodded contemplatively. “I quit my job. I’m coming home.”
“So I heard.” She toyed with the buttons on his dress shirt. She didn’t see him dressed up very often; T-shirts and jeans were his usual attire. He looked good in business casual. Sexy. And yet still very much her Todd.
He drew her close again as though he couldn’t get his fill. They were silent for a long moment, passengers flowing around them as flights were called.
“I don’t want someone else to be there for you, Nic. I want it to be me.”
“So do I.” She tipped her head up. “Let’s go home.”
“Which flight are you on?”
She opened her mouth to speak as a voice came over the loudspeaker, canceling her connector flight home due to an incoming blizzard.
“That one.”
“Me, too,” he said with a frown.
“The good news is that there’s nobody else I’d rather be stuck in a Mongolian airport with.”
He lowered his head so his forehead rested against hers. “I love you.”
And in that moment she knew that they finally had the power to make it work.
* * *
The suite at the hotel was still in her name and hadn’t yet been cleaned from earlier. The man at the check-in desk simply smiled at Nicola and Todd while wordlessly handing her the key, sending them on their way to the top floor.
“There’s a story here, isn’t there?” Todd asked as he stepped into the elevator, setting their bags down beside him.
She nodded, sliding her arms around his waist. “Remind me to tell you about it one day.”
He gave her a light peck on the lips, then stared at her for a moment before saying suddenly, “Traveling doesn’t make me happy anymore.”
The elevator doors opened and they stepped out, moving uneasily. The bags hung heavily from Todd as they stood, facing each other.
“Why’s that?” she asked.
He looked surprised by his little revelation, then concerned.
“I thought you loved the adventure of it all?” she prompted.
He slung the bags over his shoulder and pulled her hands into his. “I guess it’s just…flat…if you’re not sharing the experience with me. You wouldn’t believe how many times I turn to point something out to you and without you there it all just feels pointless. I feel empty inside, Nic, and I don’t like it. I miss you.”
She pulled him into a fierce hug, wanting to erase the sad, forlorn look he was carrying.
“Being with you is what makes me happy,” he said.
“Same for me.” She swallowed hard, making a choice. “If you want to travel again, we will. We’ll find a way.”
He gripped her shoulders, pushing her away so he could level with her. “You’re not listening, Nic. When you first said you wanted to stay in Blueberry Springs I thought I was going to lose you, because if we didn’t have traveling adventures, then what did I have to keep you close, keep you in my life? Then I realized that some of my best memories weren’t from halfway across the world, but were from us hanging out in Blueberry Springs. Making new friends, helping you with events, hiking, watching movies. Those aren’t big adventures, but they’re grand in here.” He tapped the spot over his heart. “At least to me they are.”
She tried unsuccessfully to swallow the lump of emotion in her throat, and turned, focusing on putting the key card
in the door’s lock instead. The latch released and they stepped inside, closing the door behind them.
He put down their bags and held her hands, watching her expression, not letting her escape. Apparently he wanted to see every raw and gritty emotion racing across her face right now.
“Tell me,” he coaxed as she tried to hold in a sob.
“I thought you’d left me forever, that I’d never get you back because my new life was boring.”
Tears streaked down her cheeks and he pulled her close as though shielding her from her unwanted thoughts. He gently swiped away the tears that escaped.
“I’ve never left you, Nic. Not truly. Even when we were mad and not speaking to each other I was thinking of you. Wishing you were with me. Wishing I knew how to fix us.”
“Really?”
He nodded. “And your new life isn’t boring.”
“You don’t think so?”
“No, do you?”
She shook her head vigorously. “No.”
“Can I tell you something?”
“Everything.”
He let out a shaky breath and, then with a smile, said, “I’ve never stayed with anyone longer than about a month because they weren’t you.”
She inhaled, her heart expanding, barely allowing herself to believe his words. “That’s pretty romantic, you know that?”
He gave a crooked grin, looking like his old, relaxed self. “It’s true. I always found myself comparing girlfriends to you. To how easy it is to be around you.”
“That’s unfair,” she said softly. “We’ve known each other forever.”
“But from the word go—from the day we met scooping ice cream at a library fund-raiser in seventh grade—everything has been easy and right when I’m with you. It’s never been like that with anyone else. I tried, I waited. But that something you and I have? It never appeared. Not even once. Not even a glimmer. I don’t want to be with anyone who doesn’t make me feel the way I do when I’m with you. I won’t allow my heart to settle for anything less.”
She was going to swoon; it was that simple. He was beyond perfect and she was absolutely lucky to have him. With a jolt, she saw the depth of his love in his gaze, as if it went right down into his soul, forming a core part of who he was.