Invaluable

by Holly J. Wood

  I sent a message off to Brad, and moments later received eight texts with eight answers. As a precaution—and probably to ease his conscience—Brad suggested that I try to work out the problems by myself first, and also that I should get at least one of the answers wrong so the teacher wouldn’t get suspicious.

  After knowing what the answers were, I worked backward and was able to show the work on my paper. Two of the answers were tricky though, and I still couldn’t figure out how he’d come up with the results he did, so I fudged on those and decided to accept the loss. A passing grade was all I was hoping for, after all. I sent Brad a text thanking him for his help, and I tried to ignore the sick feeling I felt at the smiley face he sent in reply.

  The bell rang and I handed in my test, but that sick feeling followed me out of the classroom and down the hall. No matter how much I tried to ignore it, I knew I’d done something wrong. The key in my pocket felt like it weighed a ton. I wished I could turn back the clock and hand in a blank sheet of paper instead of the one I’d covered with someone else’s work. Failing the test couldn’t possibly have made me feel as bad as cheating had, no matter how much I rationalized otherwise.

  Lunch was pretty quiet. Jill was barely civil to me, and it was clear something was still wrong between us. I’d tried apologizing again on the way to school this morning, but she’d just brushed me off and told me not to worry about it. I wished she would just yell at me or completely ignore me, because this false pretense that everything was fine was driving me crazy.

  Keira sat with us again, and I was extremely grateful for her company. Once she got talking, she was able to fill the gaping void that Jill’s bad mood created, and she also helped distract me from the gnawing guilt I was still experiencing over the test.

  Jason and Nick ate with us too, but Luke sat at another table with some seniors I didn’t know. My mind was so preoccupied by what I’d done in math that I hardly glanced at him more than once.

  During choir and biology, I was distracted enough that I almost forgot about the test, but as soon as I walked into the seminary building it all came rushing back to me. The pictures on the walls of the Savior and the prophet seemed to sear my conscience, so I looked at the floor until I found my seat.

  A substitute teacher came in and announced that Brother Carlton was absent today and that we would be watching a seminary video. Everyone brightened at this announcement, and I even heard a few quiet cheers. Watching a movie in class always seemed like “time off” from school, which was something we all looked forward to.

  I was beginning to feel unusually tired, so as the movie started I laid my head down on the desk, and within moments I was in a deep sleep.

  Choice and Accountability

  “Wherefore, men are free according to the flesh; and all things are given them which are expedient unto man. And they are free to choose liberty and eternal life, through the great Mediator of all men, or to choose captivity and death, according to the captivity and power of the devil; for he seeketh that all men might be miserable like unto himself.”

  —2 Nephi 2:27

  Chapter Fifteen

  I bet you’re surprised to see me here. I must admit, I’m a little surprised myself.” Grandma’s face gazed at me with an inquisitive expression. “It seems the next lesson is needed sooner rather than later—and I think you know why.”

  I hung my head and scuffed my shoe on the ground, noticing as I did that I was wearing clothes in my dream and not pajamas. And instead of being in my bedroom, we stood in an empty classroom in what I assumed was the seminary building.

  “Yeah, I think I do. You taught me about the importance of knowledge last night, and I totally blew it at the first opportunity.” I looked at her in remorse. “The thing is, I was so busy yesterday that I completely forgot about the math test, and if I’d failed, it really would have affected my grades, maybe even my chances of going to college. So . . . I . . . cheated. I didn’t know what else to do!” My chin began to quiver.

  Grandma looked me in the eyes. “Eliza, you know that honesty is always the best policy. I understand that you were feeling a considerable amount of stress and that you acted in a moment of desperation, but that still doesn’t change the fact that you made a mistake. Lying is a sin, no matter how much you try to candy coat it.” She must have seen my anguished expression, because she softened her tone. “Regardless of how much we strive to justify our actions, there is a consequence to everything we do and every choice we make—good or bad. I’m afraid I’ll have to illustrate this point, but let me warn you, this story is not a pleasant one.”

  I winced at Grandma’s tone, but I didn’t have long to wonder why she sounded that way.

  Suddenly, we were standing in an ancient-looking bedchamber. It was dark and musty. I wanted to turn on a light to dispel the gloom, but the only light source available was a pathetic, flickering candle on a small table. A man was sitting on the edge of what looked to be his bed. He had long hair and a full beard, and his clothing was strange and robe-like. His head was bent, and his entire focus seemed to be directed toward the object he held in his hands. As we drew closer, I saw that the object was a crown. The man stared at it with an expression that was almost frightening. The longing and desperation was clear on his haggard face. I felt cold chills run down my spine, and I stepped back as my mind raced to place who this guy was and why I was getting such a creepy vibe from him.

  I was about to ask Grandma to give me a hint, when the door to the room opened. It must have been nighttime, because there didn’t seem to be any more light outside the room than inside it, but in the doorframe I could see the silhouette of a woman.

  She stepped into the room, and after glancing at the man, she quickly rushed to his side. As her face caught the candlelight, I noticed that she was yet another beautiful woman. She was young and wore elegant silk robes. Her long, dark hair flowed about her shoulders.

  However, when I looked closely at her, I noticed there was something different about her. Yes, she had striking features, and I was sure she would stand out in any room, but she was unlike the other women we had visited before. Where their beauty had seemed to radiate from the inside out, this woman seemed cold and almost cruel, causing my “creepy meter” to go up a few notches. She reminded me of those scary-looking supermodels you sometimes see on the pages of magazines. As stunning as they are, somehow you can just tell by looking at them that you’d never want to be in the same room with them—much less be friends with them.

  I watched as the woman sat next to the man and stroked his arm and made a general fuss over him. Her expression appeared to be sympathetic, but in an over-the-top way that made you feel like it wasn’t authentic. Although her actions were soft, her eyes glinted with a cunning, devilish gleam.

  I shivered and turned to Grandma, who was looking at the couple with unmasked revulsion on her face.

  “I’ll make this as brief as possible, Eliza. I don’t want us to be in this place any longer than we have to, so I’ll dispense with the guessing games.”

  My curiosity was completely piqued by now; I’d never seen Grandma this serious before. “This man’s name was Jared. His account is in the Book of Mormon, in the book of Ether. Let me clarify that he is not to be confused with the righteous Jared of the same book—the one with the famous brother. This Jared came along much later, and he was wicked to the core. The young woman sitting beside him is his daughter, and it’s her story that we’re here to discuss. To spare you from witnessing the horrific events that unfold in her life, this is the only scene we’ll see, but I’ll tell you her story.

  “Jared was the son of Omer, a righteous king. He was jealous of his father’s position, so he gathered a following and overthrew his father, putting him in captivity, and taking the throne for himself. While Omer was in captivity, he had two sons who became angry at what their brother, Jared, had done. They formed their own army and were successful in overthrowing Jared and reestablishing Omer in his r
ightful place as king.

  “Jared was extremely bitter and sorrowful over his defeat. He’d had his heart set on ruling as king, and he was hungry for power. Which brings us to the scene before you. He had a cunning daughter who also thirsted for power and wanted to see her father returned to the throne. After all, if he was king then that would make her a princess. She’d already had a taste of the royal lifestyle and she craved more. So she came up with a plan and told it to her father. Listen.”

  For the first time in any of the dreams, I was able to hear exactly what the woman was saying. “Whereby hath my father so much sorrow?” she asked. “Hath he not read the record which our fathers brought across the great deep? Behold, is there not an account concerning them of old, that they by their secret plans did obtain kingdoms and great glory?

  “And now, therefore, let my father send for Akish, the son of Kimnor; and behold, I am fair, and I will dance before him, and I will please him, that he will desire me to wife; wherefore if he shall desire of thee that ye shall give unto him me to wife, then shall ye say: I will give her if ye will bring unto me the head of my father, the king.”

  Grandma turned to me. “Did you catch all of that?” she whispered.

  “I think so, but I hope I’m wrong. Did she just tell her dad that she wanted the head of her grandfather as a wedding present?” I whispered back, completely appalled.

  “Yes, revolting as it is, you heard that part right. But there’s something even more dangerous she’s putting into motion here. Did you hear her talk about the ‘secret plans of old’?”

  I nodded, my eyes wide with horror as I contemplated how evil someone would have to be to come up with such a terrible plan.

  “Those are the secret combinations you’ve heard and read about in the Book of Mormon. As the prophet Moroni explains, these combinations were what ultimately brought about the destruction of the entire Jaredite nation. They were works of darkness and authored by the very devil himself. Time and time again in the Book of Mormon we read of civilizations that were utterly wiped out because of these combinations. So you see, this woman was largely responsible for the destruction of many thousands, if not millions, of souls. She may not have been the one who actually did the murdering, but she made the choice to uncover the oaths and works of darkness and to put the idea into her father’s head.”

  My mouth hung open in shock. “So did it happen? Did Akish kill Omer? Did Jared become king again?”

  “You’ll have to read the account in Ether for the full story, but I’ll summarize a little to demonstrate the consequence of the actions of the daughter of Jared. In short, almost every part of her plan was put into action, except the Lord intervened and warned Omer in a dream that Akish sought his life. Omer was able to flee with his family before Akish could murder him.

  “Once Omer was gone, Jared took his place as king and gave his daughter to Akish as he’d promised. However, by this point, Akish had already begun the secret combinations. He thirsted for power, so he murdered Jared and then he became king. Ultimately, Jared’s daughter was responsible for the death of her own father. She’s not mentioned in the scriptures again, but as the story continues, Akish grew jealous of his son, likely her son, and he locked him up until the boy starved to death.” Grandma’s expression was somber. “This wicked woman had blood on her hands. And believe me, after she died, her reception on the other side was not a pleasant one.”

  I made a face. “Thank you for not making me see any more than this. I’m sure I would have been scarred for life!” I looked toward the door, wanting nothing more than to escape. “Can we go now, Grandma? Watching them sit there while knowing what’s going to happen is making me feel sick to my stomach.”

  She looked at me closely. “You are starting to look a little green. I’m sorry to put you through this, sweetheart. We’ve seen all we need to see. Let’s get out of here!”

  I cast one last, disgusted glance at the woman before the dismal room disappeared. The ground beneath me turned rocky and uneven, and the fresh smell of pine cleared away the last of the stench that remained from the chamber.

  We stood on a trail, about halfway up a mountain from what I could tell. The rocky edifice towered above us, its glorious peaks reaching into the clouds. Down below was an impressively steep canyon that was so deep I couldn’t see the bottom of it. Although we stood a safe distance from the edge of the trail, after seeing the treacherous drop, I took a few steps toward the safety of the mountainside.

  Grandma inhaled deeply. “Ah! It’s nice to be outside again. Don’t you love the feeling you get when you’re in the mountains? There’s nothing else like it.”

  “Yeah, and this is some mountain. I don’t think I’ve ever seen one this big. I feel like I should be wearing climbing gear or something—that drop looks downright hazardous!”

  Grandma laughed, but I still chose to sit on a rock as far from the edge as possible. She sat down beside me, and I wondered fleetingly how she managed to keep her brilliantly white dress from getting dirty.

  “Eliza, why do you think I chose to tell you the story of Jared’s daughter?” Grandma asked.

  I scrunched up my nose. The memory of watching those horrible people plotting lingered like a bad taste in my mouth.

  “Well, your visit today was unexpected—but if we’re still on track, then that means you’re here to teach me about choice and accountability, right?” I looked at her for approval, and she nodded, encouraging me to continue. “Jared’s daughter made some really, really bad choices. And, like you said, the consequences for those choices followed her during her life and even after she died.” I paused. “But here’s the thing. I mean, all I did was cheat on a math test—which was definitely wrong.” I rushed out these last words. “But did I need to see such an extreme example of bad choices? You don’t honestly think I’m capable of committing murder, do you? I have a hard time squishing a spider!”

  Grandma chuckled. “You do beat all, Eliza. Of course I’m not worried about that! But there’s a reason why Moroni included this story when he abridged the book of Ether. He knew there were lessons in this story that would be beneficial to all of us. One of the main things we can learn from it is the far-reaching effects one person can have in society. In contrast to the other women we have previously visited whose works of righteousness blessed the lives of thousands, the choices made by the daughter of Jared brought countless people into darkness and destruction. So you see, the choices we make not only affect us, but also those around us—whether we realize it or not.

  “Each of us makes countless choices every day, and every choice has a consequence. Think of it in terms of climbing this mountain. Imagine that your ultimate goal is to reach the top. When you make a good choice, you’re able to climb upward, whether it’s a small step forward for a little thing you did right, or a huge, bounding leap for a great act of goodness or charity.

  “Conversely, when you make a bad choice, you move downhill. Sometimes it may be a backward step so small you hardly notice; other times it may be a grave sin that causes you to practically fall down the mountain. At any rate, you are constantly moving either forward or backward; there’s no such thing as standing still.

  “That is the beauty of this life, and it can be summed up in one word—agency. You have the freedom to choose which direction you will take, whether it’s toward the mountain’s peak or down into the depths of the ravine. All of us make bad choices now and then—not a single one of us is perfect—but that’s where the magnificence of God’s merciful plan comes into play. No matter how many times we make mistakes and no matter how far down the mountain we’ve fallen, the Savior is always there, waiting to help us back up again. Let me repeat: He is always there. All we have to do is reach up to Him and allow the healing power of His atonement into our lives. Repentance is a miracle, and it’s available to each and every one of us. That’s the beauty of agency—that’s the reason we’re here.”

  As Grandma spoke, I knew th
at what she was saying was true, and I knew what I had to do. I felt a quiet confirmation of the Spirit at my decision and realized that the empty, sick feeling I’d experienced after the test was the absence of the Holy Ghost. Now that I knew what it felt like to be without His companionship, I never wanted to feel that way again. Suddenly, I was anxious to be done with the dream so I could put into action what I knew in my heart was the right thing to do.

  “Grandma, everything you said makes perfect sense. I realize why you came when you did.” I couldn’t meet her gaze. “I really needed to hear this today.”

  She seemed to sense my change of heart, and she smiled. “You are such a special girl. I never doubted for a second that you’d do the right thing. I know you’re ready to get back, but before you go, there’s something I want you to see.”

  She held a tiny, orange hourglass on her palm, and I watched as the grains of sand began flowing from the top of the glass, through the narrow middle, and into the bottom.

  “One of Isaac Newton’s laws of motion states every action has an opposite and equal reaction. It’s the same thing with choice and accountability. The sand moving through this hourglass represents the choices we make and the resultant consequences. Remember, while most of the choices we make are small and seemingly insignificant, they build up and eventually mold us into the person we’ll become. Few people realize that the choices they make while they’re young can affect them for the rest of their lives.” She handed me the hourglass. “Make every choice count, Eliza, and eventually you’ll make it to the top of the mountain.”