by Sadie Savage
When he opened his eyes, he saw his barefoot wife Joy standing and smiling like a happy recruit to his army of anger. He rubbed his face, thinking he was dreaming, but no; she was there with a big smile on her face.
“Hi honey! I just came down to check and see if you wanted any coffee.”
Aris smiled back. “Hey, this is how I like to wake up.” He reached for her hand and held it gently, swinging it a little. “A happy wife, ready to make me coffee. You know how I like it. I think Joe’s around here somewhere.” He looked around, a little confused.
“I haven’t seen him hon.” She moved into the destroyed kitchen, started the coffee, and then desperately started washing the dishes. Dammit, dammit, dammit. Today had been her day to get out. She had been sure it would happen today. There was still a chance; if Aris and Joe went out fishing she could get out then. Assuming he would leave her behind, which he only did occasionally. She knew if she was extra chipper, his good little wife, he’d let his guard down. Maybe.
Aris stumbled around the living room, kicking things out of the way. “Joe! Joe, my man. Where’d you go?”
From outside came a “What?” and Aris headed to the door.
Through the door, Joy could hear the two of them laughing about how adorable they were; getting drunk, passing out—weren’t they crazy? They were always quick to congratulate one another any time they overdid it, sure that they had been hilarious and fun the whole time they were destroying the furniture, breaking the TV or the refrigerator, or whatever they got their hands on. Joy always wondered at how a person could be happy about waking up in a pile of refuse over and over again. She honestly didn’t get it.
The coffee finished brewing and she poured out two extra big mugs, adding a tablespoon and a half of sugar to Aris’ mug and keeping Joe’s black. For the finishing touch she gave Aris’ a tiny splash of heavy cream just at the top, no stirring. Then she rushed around the living room—sure the two party boys would be back in any moment—picking up furniture, bottles, and garbage. She shoved it all into garbage bags and suddenly realized, she would have to walk these out to the curb. She could dump them and make a run for it.
The two men stumbled in, arms around one another, talking about some girl that Joe had been flirting with the night before.
“She wants me, I know it and you know it.” The two of them sat at the counter on the restaurant-style stools and drank their coffee. “It won’t be long until she’ll be making me coffee the way your little Joy does. Lucky bastard.” Joy continued cleaning. There was no reason to wait for a thank you or an invitation to join them; it wasn’t coming.
Joe watched Joy whip around the house, picking up, getting the spilled beer off the floor, anything to put things back in order so that Aris wouldn’t have anything to fault her for. “How did you get this little angel to marry you, Aris? How come a jerk like you has such a great little woman and I’m still single?”
Aris watched his wife over his cup’s edge. “She knows I love her no matter what. Isn’t that right, sweetheart?”
Joy stopped for a second to flash him her best smile. “That’s right.”
Joe just grunted and raised his eyebrows. “She sure works hard.”
“She likes it.” Aris put his cup down and watched his wife for a moment. “Hon, come over here for a minute.”
Oh no. She tilted her broom against the wall and walked over, the two pairs of eyes boring into her. “Your coffee okay?”
Without a word, Aris smacked her across the face. “I just thought you needed a little color. Seeing as you didn’t bother to put any makeup on.” He turned away from her and went back to his coffee. No one spoke. The only sound was that of Joe loudly slurping his coffee.
Joy stood, not quite sure what to do next, her face on fire from Ari’s slap. Finally, she shuffled back to her broom and quietly swept, the broom making a soft hush, hush on the wooden floor.
The two men focused on their mugs and their contents, neither looking at the other. Aris finally turned to Joe. “You going fishing today?”
“Can’t. My truck needs some work. Remember, I came here with Tully.”
“Oh yeah.” Aris picked up his cup and looked into it. The bottom of it was visible. “Joy, get over here and get me a second cup. Do not make me get it myself. I’m in no mood for your tricks.”
Walking fast, Joy swung around the two and into the kitchen, grabbing the pot and carefully pouring Aris his refill. She put it back and grabbed the cream, giving him a little dash in the top. Joe still had plenty so she moved around the counter again, but Aris grabbed her arm.
“None for Joe? What is this, national women’s lib day? Don’t be so rude.” He dropped her arm and she returned to her post by the coffee maker, settling in for a long wait. Joe glanced at her and she tried to send him a mental message. Help me. Be on my side, just once. Tell him to take it easy on me. Unfortunately for her, Joe’s alcohol and drug-soaked brain was unable to pick up pleas for help.
“It’s okay. I should mosey on home. Take a shower, give my own little cutie a call.” Turning to Joy, he added, “Sorry, doll. Be off the market soon. Hate to crush your dreams but a man’s gotta follow his heart.” At the word heart he thrust his pelvis at her and then laughed hysterically. He waited for Aris to laugh with him, but his friend was silent.
The long, awkward pause didn’t affect Joe in the least. He just chuckled to himself, put on his hat and went out the door. Aris turned to Joy, his eyes deader and blacker than she’d ever seen.
“What was that about?”
“What hon?”
“You’ve been waiting for Joe? Carrying a torch for him? What’s going on?”
“I don’t know. I have no idea why he said that.”
Aris picked up his mug and threw it at her hard and fast. She ducked and it shattered against the wall.
“Don’t lie to me! What is going on between the two of you? Why are my friend and my wife keeping secrets?”
Joy stayed crouched near the floor, her hands up in surrender and her eyes squeezed shut. “It was just one of his dumb jokes, I don’t know why he said it!”
“Come here.” Joy stood slowly, already sobbing. He always said if he ever caught her cheating, he’d kill her. She believed it and she felt confident today was the day. “Faster. Do it. You know better than to lie to me and then hide in the kitchen. Get your butt over here, Joy.”
Joy glanced up and saw her purse hanging on the coat rack. It was only a few feet from the door. Aris was still sitting down and she had a clear path to freedom. She moved slowly, trying to keep her face blank, but angled her feet to the living room.
She only had a millisecond to do it, so she just didn’t think. At the last possible moment, she faked Aris out and sprinted for the door. Her bare feet flew across the now-clear floor, her left hand grabbed her purse and she flew out the door.
Behind her was a screaming, irate husband breaking everything in his path. He was massively hungover but angry enough that he was like a hurricane coming after her. “I’ll kill you! You stupid bitch, you think I won’t? Get back here!” She didn’t look, just focused on jumping over the steps and then racing around to the car port behind the cabin, one hand digging in her purse for the extra set of keys Aris didn’t know about.
She threw herself into the car and started it up as fast as she could. The engine sputtered from the cold and now Aris was on the porch, throwing furniture and howling with fury. Splintered pieces of her grandfather’s rocking chair flew into the air off to one side of the porch as she tried and tried to get the engine to turn over. “Come on, come on.”
Then she saw him. He was right behind her, trapping the car between the big tree they parked under and his body. She would have to run him over.
“Joy, you steal this car and I won’t call the police. I’ll hunt you down myself. Don’t be stupid. Just turn it off and come out.”
Just then, the car started. Joy floored the gas pedal and reversed right into the
spot where Aris was standing. He leapt out of the way, falling onto his back as he did, and she sped away in reverse. As she left, she had a clear view of him jumping to his feet and walking after the car, his stare drilling into her. He was still yelling, but she couldn’t hear him. She made it to their little dirt road, whipped the car around and sped away as fast as she could.
Commanding herself not to look back, she gripped the steering wheel hard and went far too fast for the first fifteen minutes. Only after she had about sixty miles between herself and her murderous husband did she relax and drive normally. After a few miles with the radio on, the window open and Aris far behind her, she allowed her shoulders to relax and took in the landscape of the surrounding forest. It was beautiful.
“I told you I’m not interested.”
Joy’s father stood in front of her at his door. The sight of his daughter in a wrinkled dress, messy hair and bare feet did nothing to jog his memory. She was desperate for him to recognize her, but she knew if she argued with him that he would just get angry.
“Yes, you did tell me that. Which is why today, I’m here to offer you something new; I’d like to be your roommate!” She smiled a chipper smile despite being bone tired. The thought of Aris finding her in a hotel room had kept her driving most of the night. She had pulled over for the night, but her car wasn’t that comfortable and she’d only slept a few hours.
“Well, a roommate might be nice.”
Joy stepped a little closer to him. “I’m clean, I’m a hard worker, and we already like all the same TV shows.”
At that, Drew Granger’s eyebrows gave a little wiggle of delight. “You like Judge Hunter? She’s a pistol.”
“Love her!” The two went in and Joy made a beeline for the bathroom. She cleaned up as much as she could while her dad settled down in front of the television. She left him to it and went to check out her old room. There she found some boxes full of old her clothes and got a new outfit, grateful for once that her dad hated to throw anything out. It was a little chilly so she pulled on an old black sweater she had always liked and then walked back out into the living room.
“Joy, honey.” She turned to see her father fully lucid, his eyebrows raised in surprise. “When did you get in? Gosh it’s nice to see you.”
“I flew in yesterday, Dad. Remember, I told you I’m leaving Aris.”
“I told you not to marry that son of a bitch. I always knew he was trouble.”
She smiled and rubbed his hand. “You did, Dad. Thanks for trying. I’ve always had a hard time seeing other people’s bad sides. I just…” She shook her head. “I just want everyone to be good, you know?”
He patted her hand and smiled at her. “That’s because you’re the most innocent little soul on earth. I always said so.”
Her dad’s words brought little pinpricks of tears to her eyes and she quickly wiped them away. “Thank you, Daddy.”
“Will you stay long?”
“I thought I would stay here a while and help you out with everything. Would you like that?”
He guffawed. “I don’t need any help. I’m fine.”
Her father turned to the TV as the theme music for Judge Hunter started. He snatched his hand away from Joy and scowled at her. “I don’t hold hands with anyone anymore. Except my daughter Joy. So please don’t do that anymore.”
Joy nodded and swallowed hard. “Sorry about that, Steve. I’ll be more careful.”
Chapter 2
“Joy? Joy!” The gum-smacking, bottle-blond cashier at the Swing Through Gas Station ran out from behind the counter and threw her arms around Joy. The smell of green apple shampoo and vanilla perfume jogged Joy’s memory—it was Coco.
“Coco, hi.” The two regarded each other for a second, Coco with a knowing smile and Joy with an awkward grimace. “So, you’re working here now?”
“Yeah.” Coco gave a little shrug with an eyebrow raise, her signature expression. “It’s okay I guess. I mean, you know, it’s easy. What about you? You here on a visit or are you finally coming back?”
“I moved back home.” Joy put her milk and bologna on the counter, praying the question and answer session was over.
“Oh.” Coco nodded knowingly. “Your dad.”
“Unfortunately. I just don’t feel like he can live alone anymore.”
“I get it.” Coco rang up Joy’s purchases and took her money. “Remember when your dad was our English Lit. teacher and everyone hated him? We were awful! Do you remember the stuff we used to do in his class? It must have taken all his strength not to kill us.”
Joy gritted her teeth but kept a smile on her face. “I remember.” She grabbed her stuff and walked out, not bothering with a goodbye. Behind her, Coco was trying to say something but she couldn’t quite hear it. The door dinged as someone else walked in and Coco quickly switched gears.
“Terry! Hi. How are the kids?”
Outside, Joy looked around at her little hometown of Stottard, Wisconsin. She could almost take in the whole place with a couple of glances. There was the auto shop full of trucks and tractors, the cafe with the same food they’d served for as long as she could remember, the two traffic lights. All the homes were scattered in different directions, the empty space a leftover from the days when Stottard had been a haven for farmers. There were still a few farms, but now they grew an ugly, hard corn that was ground up into a weird mush used by fast food places and food processing plants. To get actual vegetables a person had to drive about thirty minutes out of town to a big chain store just off the freeway.
A big sigh came out of Joy. She could hear her younger self on the phone with her friends. They’d all been so glamorous and beautiful back then. They could spend all day putting on makeup, dreaming of big city life, assigning each other future careers like impressionist painter and the next country music star. None of them had wanted to stay here, they’d all wanted to run away as quickly as possible, but only Joy had made it out and she’d only gone as far as the surrounding mountains.
What had happened to that confidence she’d had not so long ago? She looked back inside to see Coco in her gas station shirt and her over-treated hair. Coco had been a queen bee back in high school. Everyone wanted to be her, to be near her, to get an invite to her parties. Joy and her friends had never been in the popular group, but they’d created their own little universe full of books about other worlds. They’d spend all day dreaming about kings and queens, building castles in the air so that they could climb inside. She remembered feeling so special, so ill-suited for a town like this.
And yet, here she was, right here with all the people she’d sneered at for so long. Well, that’s what a body got for making plans. She turned and walked down the path to her father’s house, wondering if he would remember her this time.
Her dad was having a good day; for the most part he knew who Joy was and why she was there. She was arranging her old room and going through her stuff while he wandered in and out of her doorway, leaning in to ask the same three questions again.
“You’ve really left him?”
“Yes, Dad. Aris and I are through. I can’t take it anymore.”
“You have a lawyer yet?”
“No, not yet. I’ll find one in a couple of days. I just need to rest. And spend time with you.
“How long are you staying?”
“I really don’t know, Dad. I hope a long time.”
When she said that, he would smile and wander away, singing a little tune to himself. Joy found herself singing along as she made her bed.
Take my girl
And you’ll take my world
Wreck my heart and
You’ll tear my soul
You don’t know how hard
I’ve fallen...
She remembered listening to that song with her high school crush, Zak. What had ever happened to that guy? One day he just wasn’t at school. Joy could still recall how shocked all their teachers had been that he seemed to have just dropped out.
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“Has anyone seen Zak? Anyone know if something happened?” They had all been genuinely concerned that such a sweet, smart student could just vanish without anyone knowing why or how. Joy had always lived with the guilt of inspiring him to disappear. She was sure she was the reason.
The two of them had gotten together and had a madly romantic couple of weeks kissing in the back of the movie theater, driving around the open country roads outside of town and telling each other their secrets. Then, suddenly, Aris had come into Joy’s life and something in her snapped. While Zak was gentle and genuine, Aris just had that bad boy edge that made Joy’s heart pound. In a few days she’d made her choice.
“Zak, you’re great. Really. But, I just want Aris. I can’t help it.”
“What?” The poor kid. He was so shocked he hadn’t said anything after that, just ran off into the night and left her on her porch. She’d felt awful, but she was sure she’d made the right decision. She couldn’t be with one guy if she was in love with someone else, right? It had seemed so clear to her at the time.
The next day, he was gone. Just like that.
Her room finished, she decided to make lunch for herself and her dad. He only ate bologna sandwiches these days. She didn’t mind, but she also really wanted to get some vegetables in his diet. She wondered how nurses went about sneaking carrots or greens into their patients’ food. It couldn’t be easy.
“Hey dad, you hungry?”
Her father walked into the kitchen with a scowl. “Why are you asking me? Aren’t you in charge around here, Brenda? If you’re hungry, make some food. Just leave some out for me and I’ll get to it.”
“Sure thing, Steve.”
“And let me know if my daughter calls. I’ve been waiting to talk to her.”
He stomped out and sat down in a huff. Joy wasn’t sure who Brenda was, but she was suspicious it was the name of a nurse dad had hired a while back. He would only be so short with a stranger.