The Father He Deserves

by Lisa Jordan

  Natalie looked at Evan and forced a smile. “What do you have in mind?”

  Evan crossed the porch, sat on the edge of the chair next to her and rested his elbows on his knees. “Time. I want to spend time with Aidan and get to know him. And I want to help provide for him financially.”

  “What about your career?”

  He frowned. “What about it?”

  She toyed with the manufacturer’s tag on the throw pillow. “How can you be a paddler and a father?”

  “Like I told you yesterday—it’s not an either-or situation, Nat. I can do both.”

  “You’re making a name for yourself. Your face was on a national magazine a couple of months ago.” Natalie dropped the pillow onto the porch floor and pushed to her feet. Folding her arms over her chest, she turned to face Evan. “He doesn’t need that kind of exposure.”

  Evan held up a finger. “First of all, it was one cover. I’m a nobody who got lucky one time and managed to get my face on the cover of a magazine only paddlers or water enthusiasts read.” He lifted another finger. “And second, I can keep my private life separate from my professional life.”

  “Keeping Aidan safe is my number one priority.”

  “Of course. Isn’t that every parent’s goal? But I can keep him safe just as well as you can, Nat.” Standing, Evan slid a hand over his face.

  “How long are you planning to be in Shelby Lake?”

  He lifted a shoulder and flinched. “I’m not sure yet. My paddling days are pretty much over for the rest of the season. Maybe for good—I don’t know. I’ll have to see how my PT goes. For now, though, I’m back home. You have twenty-four hours to consider my request and make a choice. Nat, please don’t make this any more difficult than it needs to be. Despite what you may think of me, I will be a great father. Just give me a chance to prove it. You owe me—and Aidan—that.”

  Without another word, he headed down the steps, pulling the truck keys out of his pocket. Once he’d backed out of the driveway and disappeared down the road, Natalie dropped back into her mother’s chair and buried her face in her hands.

  “Hey, you okay?”

  Natalie looked up to find her mother, dressed in paw-print pajamas, standing in the doorway. With her dark wavy hair pulled back into a low ponytail and her freshly washed face free of lines and makeup, she looked more like an older sister than her mother.

  She shook her head and swallowed past the pressure in her throat.

  “What’s going on?” Mom stepped onto the porch and sat on the swing, giving it a little push with her bare foot.

  Natalie recapped her discussion with Evan. “I just want to take Aidan and run.”

  “Running isn’t the answer. You know that,” her mother said. “What are you afraid of?”

  “You know what, Mom.” She lowered her voice to a whisper. “Him.”

  “Oh, honey, Evan is nothing like Brady.”

  Natalie’s eyes widened as she looked over her shoulder. “Don’t ever say that man’s name. What kind of father deserts his children? Or his wife? Leaving her with nothing but a destructive trail of empty promises and debts. We lost everything, including our house, because of him. And you nearly lost Ben and me because we were sleeping in the car.”

  “Sweetheart, that was twenty years ago. We’re safe now. It’s past time to stop looking over your shoulder and realize you’re safe from him. Brady can’t hurt you or me anymore.”

  Natalie blinked rapidly to hold back the tears threatening to flood her eyes. Her hair fell forward, curtaining her view of her mother. “I’ll stop when he’s buried. He vowed to find us, remember? He blames you for his arrest and promised to make us pay. How can you not look over your shoulder, waiting and wondering? Until then, I’ll do whatever it takes to protect my son.”

  “Those were the rantings of an angry, narcissistic man. We moved across the country and changed our names. He will not find us. Protecting yourself and Aidan has nothing to do with Evan.”

  “Evan landed on the cover of one magazine already. What if he does well in his career and makes it big? What if there’s more media coverage? What if people discover he has a son? What if he reads an article and finds out where we are?” Natalie’s voice rose as her chest heaved.

  She was being irrational, but how did she stop listening to the “what if” questions that had plagued her over and over? The questions had fed her fears and deepened her anxieties until she was afraid of saying the wrong thing and losing everything all over again.

  The swing creaked as her mother got off it and knelt in front of Natalie, wrapping her in her arms. “Honey, that has nothing to do with anything. You can’t keep Aidan from his own father. Your father and I have been against that from the moment you told us you were pregnant. Evan’s a good man who won’t hurt either of you. Tell him what happened. I’m sure he’ll be more than understanding. And it will help you two to bridge this gap so you can be the best parents possible for Aidan. Isn’t he what matters the most in this situation? It’s time to stop running.”

  How could she do something she’d perfected over the past two decades?

  But her mother was right—Aidan was her priority. She had to figure out how to move past her fears in order to create a future her son deserved.

  Somehow, she had to make it work.

  No matter what it cost her.

  * * *

  House hunting took a new level of patience Evan wasn’t quite sure he possessed.

  But if he wanted to prove to Natalie that he could be a responsible father to Aidan, he needed to find a different place to live. His son needed more than a tricked-out RV to call home.

  Problem was, Evan wanted to live on Holland Hill—on the property his dad had given him after dividing the farmland into five sections. A portion was to be used in some way for the Fatigues to Farming program—a condition each person received upon accepting their early inheritance. Evan’s lot bordered Arrowhead Creek, which flowed through their land. When Evan revealed he didn’t know what he could do for the program, his father had said God would offer the answer when the time was right.

  While he’d traveled on the kayaking pro tour, his lot had sat vacant. Now that he was home—maybe for good—he needed to figure out permanent digs. He had more than enough space for a house and a yard for his family.

  Family.

  Man, that still blew his mind.

  After church, he’d spent some time doing online research. He closed his laptop and skimmed the pages of notes. He had two choices—building from the ground up or buying a prefabricated house that would be built in a factory, transported on semis and put together in place. The second option might be faster and less expensive than constructing a home on-site.

  He’d have to look into financing and find a good company to work with. These were things that took more time than he wanted, but he couldn’t snap his fingers and have a house put up overnight.

  Even though car dealerships were closed, he could cruise by a couple of lots and see what was available. He needed his own wheels even sooner than the house.

  Although borrowing the truck was fine now and then, it was needed for farmwork. The last thing Evan wanted was to rely on someone else anyway.

  Since he hadn’t seen Ted at the early church service Evan had attended with his family, he wanted to swing by and say hi to his former mentor.

  Which meant seeing Natalie again.

  Less than ten minutes later, Evan pulled into the Bishops’ driveway and cut the engine. As he climbed out from behind the wheel, Ted Bishop, Evan’s former swim coach and mentor, rounded the side of the kennel. He walked a leashed black dog with a white eye patch.

  Seeing Evan, he lifted a hand and waved.

  Evan jogged across the grass and greeted him with a one-armed hug. “Hey, Coach.”

  “Evan, my man. So good to see you.�
�� Coach clapped him on the back.

  “How’s it going?” Evan frowned at the frailness of the once-healthy man who used to swim miles each day.

  The dog by Coach’s side sniffed Evan’s shoes and jeans, probably detecting River’s scent, then wagged his tail and looked up at Evan with large brown eyes. Evan cast a glance at Coach. “May I?”

  “Sure, go ahead. Petey’s a very friendly dog. He’s one of our boarders this week while his family’s on vacation.”

  Evan patted Petey’s neck. “Hey, you’re a good boy, aren’t you?”

  “You’re good with animals. Always have been.”

  “Animals don’t betray you. They’re loyal and just want to be loved.”

  “Our friend Zoe Sullivan says the same thing.” Coach led Petey to a fenced-in turf play yard and unclipped the dog’s leash. Once Petey had bounded over to play with the other dogs, Coach secured the gate and turned back to Evan, leveling him with a stare he’d seen too many times in his life. “How’ve you been? Judging by that sling, I take it paddling is on hold for now?”

  Evan glanced down at his arm. “Another dislocated shoulder, which required surgery this time.”

  “Sorry to hear that. I’ve read your magazine articles and caught your recent cover story. Nice job. Your old man and I watched a couple of your races together. You’re good.”

  “Apparently not good enough to know I should have zigged instead of zagged.” Or paid more attention to his own paddling instead of worrying about the other guy.

  Coach clamped a hand on Evan’s good shoulder and gave it a light squeeze. “Hey, it happens to the best of them. Don’t beat yourself up. As much as I’m happy to see you, I’m guessing you didn’t stop by to see me.”

  “Actually, I did. I attended the early service with Dad and Claudia and didn’t see you there. Although I’ve been by a couple of times and I’ve wanted to say hi, once Nat and I started talking about Aidan...” Sighing, he shrugged.

  “Mary and I went to the later service. It’s the one day of the week she can sleep in a little, so I try to protect that time if I can.”

  “You’re a good man, Coach.” Evan shoved his hand in his pocket and scanned the driveway, not seeing Natalie’s car.

  As if reading his mind, Coach said, “She’s not here. She took Aidan up to their cottage to start packing.”

  Busted.

  “Do you know when she’s going to be back? After catching up with you, I was hoping to chat with her. Since we’re going to be working together, I don’t want anything weird between us.”

  “It’s probably going to be weird between you two until you can get things worked out.” Coach rubbed a hand over his chin. “I’m sorry you didn’t know about Aidan until now. I may not have agreed with my daughter’s choices, but I had to respect her wishes.”

  “What reason is good enough to keep a child from his father? I’m a pretty decent guy—you can vouch for my character, Coach. I just don’t get it.”

  He shot Evan a direct look. “You need to talk to Natalie. There’s more going on here than I can share.”

  “I think I’d get more answers from Petey than from your daughter.” Evan glanced back at the farm truck. “I should go. Maybe working together isn’t the best idea.”

  “I’d like you to reconsider. Natalie needs you as much as you need her.”

  Evan shook his head. “I don’t need anyone.”

  “Baloney. We all need people in our lives. God created us for relationships—with him and with others. I admire you, Evan.” He held his hand out about waist high. “I still remember the first time I met you—a skinny little five-year-old standing at the edge of the pool afraid to jump in. But you did it. And look at you now. You faced your fears. And I really appreciate what you’ve done for us.”

  Evan cracked a smile as the faded memory of that day filtered through his head. Then he looked at Coach and lifted a shoulder. “I haven’t done anything.”

  “Oh, really, Iris?”

  Evan stuffed his hand in his pocket, trying to appear casual. He raised an eyebrow. “Iris?”

  Coach laughed and shook his head. “Don’t play me, son.”

  Dropping his gaze to the ground, Evan scuffed the toe of his flip-flop against the grass. “How did you know?”

  “You and Ben were as thick as thieves. I loved you as if you were my own son. I knew your potential, and I’ve been following your career. We’d had no known association with an Iris Buchanan in the past so when this mysterious benefactor started sending money for the Benjamin Bishop Scholarship Fund each time you won a tournament, I put two and two together.”

  Evan rubbed a hand over the back of his head. “Okay, you got me. Mind keeping this between us?”

  “Secrets can be more harmful than helpful.”

  “Ben and I—we loved the water. Some of my favorite memories include paddling around the lake or down the river with him. When I didn’t qualify for the Marine Corps, he encouraged me to pursue a paddling career, even though I was so sure I was going to fail miserably and come home a loser. But Ben—he had more confidence in me than I had in myself. I figured I could honor his memory by offering hope to someone else trying to pursue their dreams.”

  Coach clapped him on the back. “Like I said—you’re a good man, Evan.”

  Evan lifted a corner of his mouth. “You may want to share that info with your daughter.”

  “Oh, she knows. She just needs to work through some stuff to let others close.”

  Natalie’s SUV pulled in behind the farm truck. She stepped out from the driver’s side wearing jeans, a red scoop-neck T-shirt and her oversize sunglasses. Seeing Evan, she stiffened, then opened the back door.

  A moment later, Aidan scrambled out and raced over to Coach, flinging his arms around the man’s legs. “Hi, Grandpa.”

  Shooting a glance at Evan, Coach lifted the child in his arms. “Hey, A-man. What’s happening?”

  Instead of answering, Aidan scrambled out of Ted’s arms and stood in front of Evan. His small hands fisted on his hips, and he scowled at him. “You made my mom cry. I don’t like you.”

  He appreciated the kid’s desire to protect his mom, but the words still stung.

  Evan glanced at Natalie, who had pushed her sunglasses on top of her head and looked away. He crouched in front of his son. “I’m sorry I made your mom cry. I don’t like hurting people. I promise not to hurt her again...at least on purpose. Will you forgive me?”

  Aidan eyed him. “You promise?”

  “Cross my heart.” Evan x-ed his chest, then stuck out his hand.

  Aidan put his small hand in Evan’s large one, and something inside Evan’s chest broke free at the innocent trust in his son’s eyes.

  Evan wanted to haul the boy into a hug, but he didn’t want to freak him out. After all, Aidan didn’t even know who Evan was. Somehow, he and Nat had to make this work because Evan wasn’t going anywhere.

  Evan pushed to his feet. “Nat, can I talk to you a minute?”

  Nat glanced at Aidan and Ted, back at him and nodded. “Sure.”

  Coach put his hand on Aidan’s shoulder. “Let’s go make sure the dogs have plenty of water.”

  “Okay, Grandpa.” Aidan ran ahead to the kennels with Coach trailing in his dust.

  Once they were out of earshot, Evan turned to Natalie. “What did you decide?”

  She set her sunglasses back on her nose. “We need to work out an agreement between us that won’t involve the courts, but before we do that, I have a few conditions of my own.”

  “Like what?”

  “Temporary supervised visitation to ensure you can handle Aidan.”

  “What? No way.”

  Did she think he was that incompetent?

  Natalie held up a hand. “Let me finish.”

  “Fine.”

&nb
sp; “Like I said—temporary. Just until you two can get to know each other.”

  Evan ground his jaw, fighting back words he really wanted to say—words that would only widen the rift between them.

  “And your other conditions?”

  “You and your family aren’t allowed to bad-mouth me in front of Aidan.”

  Evan raised an eyebrow. “Have you met my family? My dad doesn’t say anything bad about anyone.”

  “I know, I just wanted to make it clear.”

  “Well, you have nothing to fear from me or my family. We don’t play that way.”

  “Thank you.”

  “So when do these supervised visitations begin?”

  “You’re always welcome here. Aidan can stay with you when you have a suitable place for him to sleep. Are you staying at the farm?”

  “Sort of. I crash in the RV, but I shower at the farmhouse and eat most meals with Dad and Claudia. I’m working on a permanent housing situation.”

  “I’m not asking for anything from you, but I would like to know if you’re able to help support him.”

  “Of course.” Evan lifted his left arm, still in the sling, and winced a little. “Until this is healed, I’m off the water, but I have money saved. And I write articles for paddling and water sports magazines. It’s not going to make me rich, but I won’t starve, either. Don’t worry, I can take care of my son.”

  “Our son. And have you met me? Worry is my middle name. I just want to make sure Aidan’s taken care of when he’s with you.”

  “I promise you—he will be fine. Are you living with your parents?”

  She waved a hand toward her parents’ property. “Temporarily. I came home after Dad’s heart attack to help manage the kennels. Even though he’s been improving daily, he still tires quickly these days. I’m a little concerned.”

  “He’s not coaching anymore?”

  “Well, with school out for the summer, he’s had a reprieve. His doctor will re-evaluate him before school resumes and let him know if he can return to work.”