The Father He Deserves

by Lisa Jordan

  * * *

  Something was going on with Evan, and Natalie couldn’t quite put her finger on it.

  While he was perfectly nice and well-mannered, he seemed...a bit cool toward her.

  She’d texted to see if he’d like to come over after church to pick blackberries, then stay for dinner. From the moment he arrived with Toby and River, he’d kept his distance. Well, mostly from her.

  For the past half hour, he’d been playing catch with Aidan, throwing the white plastic ball and showing Aidan how to hit correctly with the yellow bat he brought for him. Not to mention the matching Holland Farms baseball hats.

  Of course she wouldn’t begrudge him his time with their son. But when he’d arrived, she wouldn’t have minded more than a quick “Hey, Nat.”

  After their date last night, she thought they were moving closer together. Maybe she’d read more into it than what he’d intended.

  What if he was tired of her keeping him at arm’s length?

  “He’s good with Aidan.”

  A shadow fell over her as she stretched out on the chaise lounge. Caught up in her own thoughts, she hadn’t heard the sliding glass doors to the patio open. She shaded her eyes and looked up to see her father next to her, holding two glasses of lemonade.

  He handed one to her and set the other on the rectangular metal-and-stone-tile patio table. He pulled out a chair cushioned with the same hibiscus flower print as her chaise and sat with his hands folded behind his head. “Missy Chapman called. They’re coming after dinner to pick up Miko. Mind helping me to get her ready?”

  “Not at all. I bathed her while you and Mom were at church. Her things are gathered and waiting in her basket inside her suite. Once I feed her, we’ll go for another walk, then she’ll be ready to go.”

  “Thanks, Punky. I’m not sure how we would have managed if you hadn’t come home to help out.”

  “Dad, that’s what families do—they help each other.”

  “You uprooted your life, left your home and put your business on hold to be here for us. We really appreciate it.”

  “I know, and honestly, it wasn’t that much of a sacrifice. By coming home, I’m still able to do what I love, and surround Aidan with family.”

  “You didn’t have to leave, you know...after you learned you were pregnant. We would’ve helped you.”

  “I needed to learn how to be on my own.”

  “And what did you learn?”

  “I hated it.” Her vision blurred, remembering the loneliness that had blanketed way too often, when the wounds of her breakup had lingered, pricking her aching heart.

  “Maybe my heart attack was an answer to a prayer in many ways. Of course, I don’t want to be sick or add more stress on your mother, but it brought you back home and it forced me to slow down. Something your mother’s been getting on me to do for years.”

  “Maybe.”

  “You disagree?”

  “I don’t spend a lot of time praying these days.”

  “Why not?”

  “What’s the point? God’s selective in what prayers He answers. Mine never seemed to make the list, so I stopped asking. I remember being in that courtroom with the family services worker begging God to save our family, and He ignored me.”

  “Why do you feel He ignored you?”

  “We went through some really hard times. God could have prevented that.”

  “You’re right, but those difficulties strengthen your character.”

  “I was eight, Dad. Ben was ten. What did we know about character?”

  “Maybe it was to bring your mother to a place where she needed to ask for help from your grandparents. Once you moved back to Shelby Lake, you were safe. You were surrounded by people who loved you and cared for you. No one was going to hurt you again. Even though your prayers weren’t answered the minute you said them, that doesn’t mean God wasn’t working on your behalf.”

  Her father’s words lingered in her thoughts as she continued watching Evan and Aidan and snapping pictures with her phone.

  Natalie swung her legs over the side of the chaise and stood. After draining her glass, she dropped a kiss on the top of Dad’s head. “Thanks. I appreciate what you said. I need to see if those two still want to pick some berries before dinner.”

  Fifteen minutes later, blackberry stains on Aidan’s mouth showed he had eaten more than he picked.

  With her mother’s fear of snakes, Dad kept the grass cut short between the rows of blackberry bushes that had been growing behind the house for as long as Natalie could remember. Berries ranging in color from pale pink to deep purple grew from their sturdy stems. Trying to avoid the prickers, she picked the plump purple berries and left the lighter ones to ripen.

  “Dad, check out this big one.” Aidan held a thumb-sized berry in his small palm.

  Evan dropped a handful of berries in his bucket and checked out Aidan’s trophy berry. “That’s almost big enough for its own pie.”

  Natalie moved down the hedge behind her parents’ house and peeked into Evan’s bucket. It was nearly half full. “How do you pick so many so fast?”

  He waved his berry-stained hands at her. “I use two hands. When we were kids, we went berry picking with Dad. We’d have a contest to see who could pick the most berries. Jake and Tuck always beat Micah and me.”

  “Well, there’s no competition here. You have nothing to prove to me.”

  “Sure, I do. I have to prove I’m a good enough father. I have to prove that I’m not going to walk away. I’m proving my worth to you on a daily basis.” Even though the baseball hat shadowed his face and he spoke with a smile in place, his words held an edge that didn’t sit well with her.

  Was that the impression she was giving off? Even after last night?

  How could she let Evan know he had nothing to prove to her?

  Chapter Ten

  The last thing Natalie wanted to do was offend a client, especially one who had been a loyal customer for the last ten years. Despite the frozen smile on her face and the automatic nodding of her head, she was freaking out.

  Of course, Evan was there when Missy Chapman, the wife of the owner of the local news station, arrived to pick up the dog they’d been boarding for the past week.

  When Missy suggested showcasing the service dog training program as one of their news channel’s human interest pieces, Evan jumped on the idea. Once he’d started talking about the service dog project partnered with his family’s Fatigues to Farming program, there was no stopping him.

  “So what do you think, Natalie? Would you like to be a part of this special feature?”

  Natalie’s heartbeat thundered in her ears, drowning out the tall redhead’s words. She took a step back as her eyes darted around the yard searching for a place to escape. Maybe to hide.

  Her body thrummed as a rush of adrenaline coursed through her.

  She pulled in a shaky breath.

  Somehow she needed to keep it together.

  In just a few more minutes, Missy would head out. Then Natalie could talk Evan out of pursuing the dumb idea the woman had put in his head.

  Except it wasn’t a dumb idea.

  It was a brilliant one. The publicity would benefit the Hollands’ program.

  However, Natalie wanted no part of it. She needed to figure out how to get out of it.

  Once Missy backed her SUV out of the small lot and disappeared around the bend, Natalie sagged in the doorway.

  Evan moved beside her. “Hey, you okay?”

  She reached for the bin that held Missy’s dog’s belongings. “Not really.”

  “What’s going on? I figured you’d be thrilled about this free publicity.”

  “Don’t get me wrong—it’s great. I...just don’t want to be a part of it.”

  “Why not? Mrs. Chapman said they love h
uman interest stories like this one and she could get great coverage for the service dog project, for the veterans, to raise awareness. Opportunities like that don’t come along very often.”

  “I know. You should take it. Talk to your dad and your brothers. You guys will do a great job. Just count me out.”

  “But, Nat, you’re an important part of this program—without Bishop Boarding & Kennels, I wouldn’t have even gotten involved.”

  Natalie grabbed his arm. “Evan, if you decide to do this, please promise me you will keep my family out of this. Me, Mom, Dad and definitely Aidan.”

  He rubbed a hand over a jaw, something she’d seen his father do so many times over the years. “I don’t get it, Nat. What’s going on? You think it’s a great opportunity, yet you don’t want anything to do with it?”

  She coiled Daisy’s leash around her hand, focusing on keeping the lines straight and smooth. “I don’t want to be on camera.”

  “I know you’re shy, but I’ve seen the way you’ve handled clients. You’re warm and generous, and once you start talking about the program, you light up and everything else seems to disappear.”

  “That’s not what I mean.”

  “Then what? Help me to understand.”

  She shook her head. “I can’t.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because...”

  “Great answer.”

  She scoffed and shook her head again. Why did Evan even put up with her? She was being ridiculous, but she didn’t know what else she could say to protect the secret buried deep within her.

  She’d known Evan for a large chunk of her life, and, yes, her secret would be safe with him.

  By sharing it, she risked exposing...and losing everything she loved.

  The rational side of her thinking reminded her how implausible that fear was of actually coming true. But then her anxiety kicked into overdrive, drowning out common sense.

  She lifted her face to find Evan watching her. His blue eyes filled with kindness and compassion. His strong hands were inches from hers.

  Evan, strong and loyal, who put others before himself. Evan, who chased big dreams. Evan, who was proving to be a fantastic father. Evan, who had stolen her heart years ago.

  She couldn’t deny it anymore.

  She was falling in love with him all over again.

  And if she loved him, then he deserved to know the truth.

  Unwinding the dog’s leash off her hand, she flexed her fingers and held out a hand to Evan. “Let’s go for a walk.”

  He glanced back at the yard. “What about Aidan?”

  “He’s busy helping Dad feed the dogs. I’ll let them know where we’re going.”

  After informing her dad, she returned to the yard, still feeling her father’s kiss on her forehead. She nodded toward the road. “Let’s go.”

  With Daisy and Toby at their sides, they headed down the quiet, tree-lined country road that led to the new trail to Evan’s property across the creek.

  “I’ve always loved living here. We’re only a couple of minutes from town, but we’re still secluded enough to enjoy the peace and quiet.”

  “That’s important to you, isn’t it?”

  Nat nodded.

  “Other than when I’m chasing rivers, I’ve lived here all my life—born and raised on the hill.”

  “You’re fortunate to have such a wonderful family, Evan. I hope you never take that for granted.”

  “Losing Mom gutted me. I’ve learned the value of gratitude. You can lose everything in a short minute.”

  Oh, how she knew...

  She stopped and tightened her grip on the leash. She looked at Evan, then shifted her gaze to over his shoulder where the tree branches dipped and swayed with the gentle breeze stirring the leaves. “I need to tell you something, but you have to promise not to breathe a word of this to anyone—not your dad, your brothers, anyone. Promise me.”

  Evan frowned, concern wrinkling his forehead. “What’s going on, Nat?”

  “Promise me, Evan.”

  “Yes, I promise.”

  With her heart hammering against her ribs and feeling suddenly chilled by the warm breeze, Natalie dragged a shaky hand through her hair. She dug in her front pockets looking for a hair tie, but they were empty.

  A feeling she knew too well.

  Wrapping her arms around herself, she lifted her eyes to Evan and blew out a breath. “My name...my name is not Natalie Bishop.”

  “Wha—”

  She held out a hand. She had to get this out. Because any moment now she was about to turn and race back to the house, run up to her room and lock the door.

  But she wasn’t a child anymore. She was a grown woman who needed to face her past.

  “I was born Jessica Ann Henderson. Ted is not my biological father.”

  Evan’s eyes widened, but he didn’t say anything. Which she appreciated.

  “Honestly, Ev, my past sounds more like a cable movie.” She let out a strangled laugh. Tears pressed against the backs of her eyes. “My real father—Brady Henderson—had a gambling addiction. He left all the time, promising he’d be back. We never knew when he’d return or what kind of mood he’d be in. I learned he couldn’t be counted on. When I was eight, I woke up in the middle of the night to my parents fighting. Apparently, my father had gambled away the rent money, and we were being evicted. My father promised to come up with the money to prevent that from happening. He left and didn’t come back.”

  “Nat, I’m sorry. No wonder you felt like I had abandoned you.”

  She lifted a shoulder. He was right, but she needed to get out the rest of the story before detouring down a rabbit hole.

  “Mom worked two part-time jobs, but it wasn’t enough. For a week, we slept in our car—the one thing my father managed not to gamble away. We’d go to a fast-food place for breakfast, and Mom would wash us up in the bathroom before taking us to school. She tried to call it a great adventure, but even at eight years old, I knew something wasn’t right. Apparently, before we were evicted, my father stole money from his job to feed his addiction and ended up getting fired. One day at school, I told my best friend about our so-called great adventure, but I didn’t realize my teacher could hear us. She ended up calling child protective services. All because I couldn’t keep a secret.”

  “Nat, you were a child—it wasn’t your fault. You were a victim of your circumstances.”

  “Regardless, Ben and I were placed in temporary foster care and went through the court system.”

  A fragment of a memory floated through her thoughts. Screaming for her mother over and over as a social worker carried her writhing body out of the cold, gray courtroom.

  She forced herself back to the present. “While that was happening, my father robbed a convenience store and ended up being chased by police. I can’t remember where he holed up, but somehow, he managed to call my mom at work for help. Instead of helping, she turned him in, and he was arrested. He blamed her and vowed to find her and make her pay. The media coverage was unbelievable. My grandparents came and rescued us. We ended up moving to New York to live with them, leaving behind everything I had known and starting over. That included new names.”

  “Why new names?”

  “To protect us from my father’s messes. It became national news because my father’s crimes crossed state lines and the FBI had to get involved. Mom divorced my father, then his parental rights were terminated on grounds of abandonment. She created new identities, a new life, a fresh start for us.”

  “I’m sorry for all that you have gone through.”

  Natalie lifted a shoulder. “We’re better off. She met Ted Bishop, who treated Ben and me like his own. After he and Mom got married, he asked if he could adopt us and be a part of his family. The day our adoption was finalized, Dad gave me a puppy named
Shiloh, which means peace. She had been abandoned by her family. Soon after Mom and Ted married, we moved to Shelby Lake when he was offered the coaching job. Once Mom opened her clinic, Dad opened the kennels. The dogs were therapeutic. From that moment on, I knew I wanted to use animals to bring comfort to others.”

  “You’re an amazing woman, Natalie, especially for everything you’ve been through.” Evan wrapped her in his arms and drew her against him. “Thank you for trusting me enough to share that with me. Is it safe to assume you don’t want the media coverage because of the memories it brings up?”

  “Maybe. Partly. Even though I know it’s not rational—and Mom keeps telling me it’s not going to happen—I have this fear that Brady will see the coverage and find us.”

  When Evan opened his mouth to speak, Natalie held up a hand. “I know it’s not going to happen, but like I said, it’s an irrational fear. That’s another reason I kept Aidan from you—you were doing well in your career. I saw an interview Dad was watching, and I didn’t want Aidan caught up in that publicity. Also, if someone started digging, they could uncover our past. Mom’s worked so hard to put that behind her. Discovering where we came from could destroy everything all over again.”

  “Nat, I can’t even imagine the trauma you’ve endured. But you’re not alone in this. I’ll do whatever I can to keep you and Aidan safe, do whatever it takes to put those fears to rest.”

  She searched his face. No traces of anger lingered in his eyes about her betrayal of who she really was. “You’re not mad?”

  “Mad? About what?”

  “I—I lied to you...about who I was, where I came from. I’m the daughter of a liar, a thief.”

  He tipped up her chin and brushed the barest of kisses across her lips. “You didn’t do it to be deceitful, but to protect yourselves. Coach adopted you and gave you a new name, a new identity, a fresh start. You can’t change where you’ve come from, but you can change where you’re going. I will help you as much I can.”

  The sincerity in his eyes was nearly her undoing. She pressed her ear against his chest and listened to the steady drumming of his heart. She closed her eyes and breathed in the scent of sunshine and fabric softener from his T-shirt.