by Carole Gill
“Come, Rose. Let us go about our day off. Is there anywhere you’d like to go?”
As I had no suggestion, she said she had errands to run and suggested we could meet up later if that was alright with me.
I quite agreed as I wanted very much to see that cleric.
St. Hubert’s Chapel. That was the name of it. He introduced himself as Vicar Hobbs. Rather than question me about why I’d come, he asked me into the rectory. “This way, if you care to follow me. God’s House is always open.”
The hall had the rich scent of wood and polish and something else—a trace of incense probably from Sunday worship. “We can talk in here.”
“Sit, please. Now before you go on, let me say I recognized her, the girl with you. And you say you work there as well?”
“Yes, I am governess there.”
He regarded me coolly for some moments. “How do you find working there?”
I told him that they were nice to work for. “And I do like the children.”
I thought the look in his eyes grew quite hard when I mentioned them. “And do you like everything else? Is everything else to your satisfaction?”
It seemed to me there was much implied by that question. I sighed. “I find myself wondering about so much…”
“Young lady, if you ever need to see me about anything at all, this church is always open to you. You won’t forget?”
“No, vicar. I will remember. I promise you.”
I thought him a nice man although I was troubled by what he said. Not the offer of consultation that was nice, if a bit confusing, as I did not see the need for it.
I further reasoned that perhaps he knew something of Mrs. Darton and that she and the house were therefore the objects of his disapproval. Whatever it was, I thought foolishly it had nothing to do with me.
*
The trek back to Blackstone House was fun for we chatted the entire way. Neither of us was tired. I said I felt as if I could walk for miles.
Dora smiled and told me it was the bracing air that was doing me a world of good.
At last we came in sight of the house.
“Look who’s there,” Dora said.
Mrs. Sternwood stood in the doorway. “She looks like the devil himself.” I expected Dora to laugh but she didn’t.
I barely acknowledged her, but as I passed her, she called after me. “You will dine with the children, Miss Baines, as Mr. and Mrs. Darton have an engagement in Manchester this evening.”
Was it my imagination or did she sound delighted that I was to eat only with the children as she saw it?
It was during the night that I heard the Dartons’ carriage drive up. I heard their voices in the hall and Mrs. Darton say, “Oh yes she is, Louis! Goodnight!” whereupon I heard a door slam.
Then just moments later, I heard soft knocking and Mrs. Sternwood’s voice quietly calling for Mrs. Darton.
I do admit I not only eavesdropped but also peeked to see Mrs. Darton open her door and Mrs. Sternwood step quickly inside.
I know now they were having an affair. I didn’t realize it then, innocent that I was. Thinking nothing of it I went to sleep.
Little did I know what drama would occur the next morning with me on center stage.
Chapter 19
How life tricks us sometimes, lulling us into a false sense of security when in fact danger is all around us, evil plotting, waiting for its turn. For evil is an opportunist that often manages to overtake fate and win. It is alas a dire truth I have sadly learned to recognize as truth.
It was plotting now and would soon win out to steer me into unchartered waters.
You see, there was no portent of things to come. No hint that everything would change or that I was about to enter the mouth of hell.
One would think there would have been a sign—an inkling, something—but alas there was not.
And so on that fateful morning, I washed and dressed. The water was cool but I preferred not to wait for Dora. Besides, most of the time the water she brought was tepid at best.
It was a lovely day and I was pleased for it helped me to be more cheerful and to put aside thoughts of Mrs. Darton and that frightful incident.
Dora came to tell me the children were already at breakfast. “And they’ve eaten well, Miss. They are waiting though, dear lambs, so that you might have yours with them.”
That made me smile, as I could picture Ada insisting she would not leave until I had had my fare.
Dora left and I finished dressing and doing my hair. I then left my room completely unaware of the danger that was lurking close by.
It wasn’t until I walked toward the stairs that I began to have a feeling that someone was behind me. Sure enough, I turned to see Mrs. Sternwood staring at me. I quite gasped as her expression was one I shall never forget. It had the combined look of evil and insanity to mark it.
And although I am certain only a matter of seconds passed it seemed then that the moment was frozen in time, paralyzed by fear—my fear, for I knew at once what her intention was. She was going to push me down the stairs!
“No!” I cried. “Please no!”
She seemed to smile just briefly, an evil, hellish smile before she lunged forward and pushed. I tottered for a moment, trying to regain my balance--waving my arms about crazily, but it was no good. I soon fell screaming as I hit the stairs.
There was pain and then blackness which could have been death but was not.
*
I have no idea how long I was unconscious. All I remember is opening my eyes and seeing the face of Mr. Darton. Dr. Antor was with him.
Mr. Darton looked very upset and was clearly putting on a brave face for my benefit. “You’ve had a fall, Rose but you will be fine. Dr. Antor has examined you. We are going to move you now.”
Dr. Antor nodded. “It will hurt I am certain, but we need to put you on something soft where you will be more comfortable. You mustn’t try to walk; I don’t want you standing just yet. Just hold on tightly to Mr. Darton and he will lift you up.”
I tried to nod but my neck hurt and I cried out.
“It’s alright, Rose. Just relax. We’ll have you up there in your own bed in no time.”
I bit my lip for I was determined to be brave. But I felt so much pain as Mr. Darton took me in his arms. It was indescribable.
“Not too much farther, you will see.”
It seemed to take forever that climb, but at last we reached my room.
If it hurt when he first picked me up, it hurt more when Mr. Darton put me down on my bed.
And then, just as he released me I heard him sigh.
When I glanced up to thank him, I saw he had tears in his eyes. He smiled sadly and left, for Dr. Antor wished him to. “This is no time for company,” I heard him say. “Now, Rose. I am going to give you something that will make you sleep. Sleep and rest, that is what you need, and good food, too.”
A sharp stick in my arm and one last reassuring smile from him before my eyes closed and I let sleep draw me into its embrace.
I slept a very long time. Waking seemed to be for me just an extension of sleeping for I felt dull and confused as if the world was hazy and everything in it unreal and dreamlike.
I heard conversations, voices of people I knew; yet I cannot be certain if I really heard them or if it was a dream.
There were snatches of talk, most of it dull-sounding stuff, although one conversation about Mrs. Sternwood took place outside my door.
I heard Mrs. Darton say, “Of course I do” and “I don’t care. Tell Molly to use all of it.” And she repeated it too, her voice growing more adamant as she did.
Then Mrs. Darton said quite clearly. “What?! You know it can’t stop now…”
To which Mr. Darton replied, “We shall see…”
Now whatever did that mean?
When Dora came in later I asked her about what I had heard Molly say. Dora smiled. “Oh Miss! Go on with you, you must have been dreaming.”
&nb
sp; I would have thought so too if Dora hadn’t looked decidedly odd when she said that.
When she told me that Mrs. Sternwood had been given the sack, I was shocked. “You mean she won’t be arrested? She tried to kill me, Dora!”
“I know, but the master and mistress…”
“Didn’t want any scandal, is that it?”
Dora shrugged. “Please, Miss. Don’t be upset. She ain’t here to trouble you no more.”
It was true I supposed. “I just hope she won’t come back…”
Dora shook her head. “She won’t come back.”
Now that I think back on it I can understand exactly what Dora meant, but I couldn’t then.
So there were changes; not only was Mrs. Sternwood gone, but Mrs. Darton’s manner changed. She was friendly but guarded and rarely saw me now.
Dora said Mrs. Darton had a lot on her mind, adding that she and Mr. Darton were having some serious quarrels. “You wouldn’t believe what they say to one another. I’ve never heard anything like it, Miss.”
I was to think about that a great deal in the next few days.
*
It wasn’t long before I was on my usual and much disliked fare of food and wine.
I smelled it even before Dora took the cover off. “I don’t think so Dora, I don’t think I could possibly manage to get all of that down, look at it.”
It was a massive portion of meat topped with gravy and roast potatoes. “All this? Are you certain I’m supposed to eat so much?”
I expected her to smile but she looked serious, almost fearful. “Yes, Miss, please. They want you to, Mr. Darton and the Doctor, they are adamant about it, for the fall has weakened you. Oh please Miss, try.” It was the most amazing thing, but she seemed on the verge of tears.
“Dora, are you alright?”
She said she was but flew out of my room as quickly as she could I thought, leaving me to stare at those infernal puddings and meat pies. It was funny but I thought invalids were often given light diets—toast and soups and things, not heavy food with thick gravies.
Dora always returned, it seemed to me to make certain I ate and drank everything. “Oh, you haven’t finished this Miss, you really ought to.”
It was no use to argue. So invariably I would finish the blasted thing.
Dr. Antor checked on me often. Dora said he was staying for the time being, which I thought was nice.
I did like him as he seemed such a sincere man. Yet I found him to be a bit evasive sometimes, like on the question of my health—I would often remark that how I felt, fluctuated. I either felt reasonable, considering the fall, or horrible. And what about how hot I got? So warm and clammy that my linen had to be changed almost constantly.
If I had felt particularly strong and vibrant before the fall, I now felt different, fragile and frightened and not at all strong. I asked Dr. Antor about it.
He nodded. “Yes, it is all due to your fall.”
He went on to explain that in his estimation I had contracted a fever that he was treating as best he could; hence the copious amounts of meat and that awful wine.
I explained that I had been having that before the fall to which he smiled and said he knew but this was all to build me up once again. “Only this time it is starting from a disadvantage as your health has been thrown back and we must compensate because of it.”
I tried to ask him more but I found him somewhat evasive. Yet at least he seemed to realize my concerns and said things to me to make me feel better.
Within a few days he left for his own residence, although he would continue to see me regularly.
As for Mr. Darton, he began to come in constantly, always saying the same thing. “I had to see how you were, is there anything I can get you?”
It was lovely seeing him. I began to look forward to these visits. Invariably he’d just sit and stare at me, hardly speaking. It seemed he was just content to smile at me and speak of superficial things with always that sad, lost look in his eyes, a look almost of profound regret.
Once or twice he looked as though he was going to tell me something, something frightfully important. But he didn’t. Instead, he’d rise slowly to his feet and bid me good night.
How I longed to call him back, for I had my own heartfelt things to tell him.
I also still dreamt of Mrs. Darton but now the dreams were different, for they weren’t just about her but about Ada and Simon too and they weren’t just dreams any more, they were nightmares.
Chapter 20
The dreams were terribly unsettling and I’d wake feeling breathless. It would take me some time to come to myself.
I mentioned it to Dr. Antor but I found his reaction off-handed. “Well, nightmares come and go; very often it’s actually nothing but nonsense.”
I didn’t reply to his statement. The important thing was that I seemed to be recovering with lightning speed. Dr. Antor promised I would if I followed his orders.
He kept urging me to continue eating what was brought to me. As much as I didn’t like to, I did listen. But when he suggested I drink that foul smelling tea I objected. “Very well,” he said. “But it is a cure-all for most complaints. I have no doubt you will eventually like it; it is after all an acquired taste.”
Acquired taste. It was foul! “I will try,” I lied. I wanted to spill it out each time it was brought to me, but I daren’t as I had a feeling he would know. There wasn’t any place to dispose of it because of the odor. Wherever I put it, Dora would smell it.
I finally just told her. “Just take it away Dora, this is one thing I cannot manage. I will tell Dr. Antor myself.”
“Very well, Miss.”
I was pleased I didn’t have to, for the next time I saw Dr. Antor he did not bring it up.
I think actually he was pleased with my progress and decided I didn’t need it as I was feeling a great deal better.
But if I was better I soon felt bored, for feeling better brought with it another kind of suffering as there was nothing to do.
I was grateful I was ambulatory. Not that I moved easily, but I was able to move around my room a bit and often gazed out at the moors.
The moors can look strangely beautiful sometimes as the land seems to almost change color with light and shadow. And now that summer had come, there was the vividness of the heather and the foxgloves to admire.
Apart from that there were the sounds of wildlife, too—the warble of birds that was so like music.
Yet I still grew bored as there wasn’t all that much to look at. But then it all changed as I began to notice a great deal of comings and goings. I asked Dora and she told me Mr. Darton was readying something.
I began to see him and Tom quite frequently walking out there. Whatever it was he and Tom were “readying”, I thought it odd that it seemed to be located on the moors!
That was the funny thing. I’d watch them and occasionally see Dora and Molly also trailing back and forth carrying things.
I couldn’t tell what it was they held, although some of it looked like small pieces of furniture and pillows and things.
Every time I saw Dora I tried to find out what it was all about. But she rarely told me much. She seemed frightened to speak out of turn I thought, afraid she’d be telling me something she wasn’t supposed to.
“I think it has something to do with Mr. Darton’s business,” she said. “Although I can’t be certain.”
“Oh? Is he opening another club?”
She nodded. “Yes, something like that as far as I know. He likes running them.”
I didn’t know much about clubs except the rather posh gentleman’s clubs in London. “What are these gentlemen’s clubs then? And why would it be here and not in town, for it seems to me he is fixing something up here. Is he, Dora? And is it out on the moors?”
I think I must have touched on something because she got flustered and nearly flew to the door. “I have my duties to attend to, Miss. The children are going away to spend some time with
the Lodge sisters down Grange way and I’m needed.”
I was sorry to hear it, for I had just been so enjoying their regular visits to me. “I shall miss them.”
Dora nodded. “Yes, I am sure you shall.”
I did at least get to say goodbye to them before they left. Ada hugged me and said neither she nor Simon wished to leave. I quite found I had a lump in my throat when they did finally go.
Dora tried to cheer me up by saying Dr. Bannion was coming up Friday, which pleased me as he hadn’t been up for a while.
He saw me as soon as he arrived. I could hear him bounding up the stairs. I smiled when he burst into the room. “Rose, you are a lucky girl! It could have been so much worse.”
“Yes sir, it was a nasty fall, although it couldn’t be helped.” I couldn’t help but say that, after all that lunatic Sternwood had been responsible.
He eyed me carefully. “Yes, Mrs. Sternwood must have been demented to do such a thing. Still, she’s gone from this place now, which can only be a good thing!”
We spoke for a while. I asked him about Grace and he told me she was well and had asked for me. I was delighted and asked him if I could write her.
He sighed. “The poor dear cannot read Rose, but if you like I can write for her.”
I thanked him but said no, for I imagined him too busy to do such a thing.
“Well, I should be pleased to if you change your mind.”
He seemed excited and terribly happy about having come up, very animated as if he was delighted about something. “I think you look well enough to dine with us tomorrow night, Rose. What do you say to that?”
I was too excited to even reply.
I wore my blue silk gown. Dr. Bannion smiled and nearly winked. It was flattering but it was Mr. Darton’s reaction I sought.
The Dartons were in the library having aperitifs. I hoped Mr. Darton’s face would light up when he saw me, but it didn’t. If anything, I thought he looked even more sad than usual.
Mrs. Darton looked opulent, dressed in a cherry red satin gown. “Ah Rose, we are delighted to have you join us.”
Mr. Darton glanced away then as if he wished nothing to do with that comment. My heart sank for I thought it was her idea that I be invited and not his.