Giggling Into the Pillow

by Chris Bridges

  Hey Kids! Sex Survey!

  Just that. I love filling out surveys. You should have seen what I did with the Census.

  My New Year’s Resolutions

  And with firm resolve and an indomitable iron will, I broke every single one of them, often during the same sporting event.

  What It Was, Was Porno

  Remember those long highway drives I mentioned? One day I popped in an old cassette of Andy Griffith doing his standup routines, and then I couldn’t stop thinking of this story for weeks before I got it all written down. Writing isn’t always a way to inspire or entertain or teach others. Sometimes it’s because your head is so full you have to dump it out on paper so there’s room for other thoughts, like when to eat, your children’s names, and what time you’re supposed to be at work. For best effect, have someone Southern read this to you.

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  About the Author

  Chris Bridges is younger than the mayfly and older than the hills, but he still gets carded.