Frontier Fires

by Rosanne Bittner

  She smiled, reaching up and taking his hand. “I love you so much. I knew how you were hurting over Tom, and I couldn’t figure out …” Her words broke as the tears came. “… how to make you feel better.”

  He squeezed her hand. “That wasn’t your job, Lynda. Nothing you could have done, or Sarah or anyone else, could have changed how I was feeling inside. I just didn’t realize until today how far it had gone. It won’t happen again, I promise you. And no father could love a daughter more than I love you. Now you get some rest. Jess will be in in a minute to stay with you. Your mother and I are going to sleep over at your place.”

  She sniffed. “Poor Jess. He’s been after m to stay home. He’s so good to me, Father.”

  Caleb nodded. “I know. And he’s the one you should devote yourself to first, Lynda. Not me. Jess is your husband. You listen to him and do what he tells you, understand? He’s a good man. You’ve been hurting him by helping me. I don’t want that.” He kissed her again and rose. “Get some sleep now.”

  He gave her hand another squeeze, then left her, going into the outer room where Sarah was waiting. “Is she all right?” she asked.

  “She’s our daughter, isn’t she? She’s got your strength and my stubbornness. Of course she’s all right,” he answered, coming closer. He put a hand on her arm, looking at her sheepishly. “Will you come over to the other cabin with me?”

  Sarah felt a sweet warmth move through her. The old Caleb was returning. She knew Caleb Sax well enough to realize he was sick inside over what he had done, and she knew it was only grief that had made him do it. Now he had finally faced that grief, was awakened to what it was doing to him and his family. She hugged him, burying her face against his chest.

  “I’ll come,” she said softly.

  He gave her a hug. “I love you,” he whispered. “God, I love you so.” He led her to the door and outside, where he left her a moment to go tell Jess they would sleep at his cabin.

  Jess watched them walk into the darkness, relieved that Caleb Sax seemed to have overcome some of his grief over Tom. The great love between Caleb and Sarah was evident. No better proof could be had than the powers the woman had to heal Caleb of the worst loss of his life.

  Caleb led Sarah into the cabin, closed the door and lit a lamp. He said nothing as he led her into the bedroom, where he made her sit on the bed while he picked up her foot and began unbuttoning her shoe. He pulled it off.

  “You must be tired, Sarah. If you’re too tired I’ll just hold you and let you sleep.” He picked up her other foot and began working that shoe off.

  “No. I am tired, but we both need this,” she said softly. “It’s so nice to be with you again, Caleb,” she added.

  His blue eyes seemed glazed, for his desire for her was keen. The thought of hitting her … it made him ache inside. How could he have done that? He reached up under her dress, getting hold of her slips and bloomers and pulling them off. Her heart raced with anticipation as he pulled off her stockings and lightly kissed her feet, gently massaging her feet and legs, relaxing her more.

  Their eyes held. Caleb sat beside her and began unbuttoning the back of her dress. It had its own supports, and because of the warm day she wore no other support under it. He slipped it down over her shoulders to her waist and she pulled out her arms, blushing, her heart pounding when he leaned down to lightly suck at her full nipples.

  “Oh, Caleb, it’s been so long,” she whispered, grasping his long hair.

  He kissed her breasts over and over, laying her back on the bed. He pulled the dress all the way off so that Sarah lay naked before him. He stood up, removing his clothes and moccasins. She studied his magnificent build, still so hard and strong; his powerful shoulders and narrow hips, flat stomach and strong thighs. He was so beautiful. She remembered that even as a little girl, when he was only a nine-year-old Indian boy, she had thought him beautiful.

  He crawled onto the bed beside her, moving a hand gently over her stomach and down to explore that secret place that belonged only to Caleb Sax, making her shudder, feeling already on his fingers the sweet, satiny moisture that invited him inside. It tore at his heart to see the bruise on her face.

  “From now on this is the only way I will touch you, Sarah Sax,” he told her, his voice gruff with desire. “Gently … lovingly.” He kissed the cheek. “I’m so sorry.”

  Their lips met then, and she was suddenly wild and bold, running her hands over his hard muscles, down over his back to his hips, feeling their strength, and moving a hand around to caress that part of him that made him so much a man. She pressed against him, opening her legs and wrapping them around him, guiding him into herself in great need and joy.

  He groaned with the glory of it, the intense passions that moved through him, a mixture of humble gratitude and almost agonizing love. Caleb surged into her as he kissed her savagely, wondering if he would ever get enough of her this night.

  “Sarah, my Sarah,” he groaned, burying himself in her as his lips moved to her neck. “Forgive me.”

  She arched up to him rhythmically. “Just be my Caleb,” she whispered.

  Texas abounded with talk of annexation to the United States. The new Republic struggled through terrible poverty, even going to England and France to secure financial aid and managing to negotiate trade agreements with both nations. Because of Texas’s very shaky economy and the fact that Mexico still had not formally recognized it as a separate country, the United States hesitated at becoming involved at all. However, France’s formal recognition of Texas as its own country brought about a new respect for the Republic, and the United States began to take another look. But Texas was filled with slaves by then, and the slavery issue began to loom as a major factor in whether or not Texas should be annexed by the United States.

  It was that same year that a new president was elected for Texas—Mirabeau Lamar. He promised glory for Texas, recognition from other nations, especially Mexico; a national bank and a public school system; and harsh action against Indians on Texas soil … all Indians. Lamar won by a landslide. Sam Houston, a friend of the Indians and a foe of slavery, could not run for a second term, and even if he had, it was unlikely he would have won. His beliefs were not shared by the great majority of new Texans. Houston did, however, manage to be elected to the lower house of the Texas Congress, where he immediately formed a strong opposition to the policies of Mirabeau Lamar.

  Mexico threatened renewed attack from the South. The Republic continued to be riddled with torn factions, poverty, and lawlessness. Lamar announced that Texas didn’t need the United States, that rather than annexation they should be looking toward a powerful independent republic that would be recognized by all the great powers of Europe. They could take care of themselves.

  The United States immediately dropped all renewed offers of annexation. Texas stood alone, ruled by a man of great dreams with no sure way of realizing those dreams and no money to support them.

  But Caleb Sax had only one concern. Lamar was an Indian hater, and so were most of the new settlers of Texas. Caleb knew how white men thought. Their hatred of the Comanche, who continued to raid and bring great destruction and sorrow to Texas settlers, would be turned toward all Indians, even the peaceful ones. Jake Highwater also felt the pressure. Two of his sons had already left the ranch and headed for Indian Territory to settle there. But Jake and Ada stayed on with their remaining son. Jake knew all Cherokee were living on borrowed time, but Caleb Sax needed his help. Caleb had given him a home here and now he was in trouble himself. He would not desert his good friend.

  At dusk one night in the spring of 1839, Emily Stoner’s fancy carriage pulled up in front of the Sax house. The woman disembarked, wearing a dark blue dress of the latest fashion, a gown which, unlike her usual apparel, was deliberately modest. She wore a hat that tied with heavy lace around the sides of her face, hiding her scar. Caleb came out to greet her, embracing her, while Sarah hurried out behind him, followed by Pepper. Now over a year
old, the dog was big and shaggy, and he stood watching Emily with a wagging tail, sensing she was friendly.

  “Emily, where have you been? It’s so good to see you,” Sarah said while Caleb hugged the woman.

  Emily pulled away from him and turned to Sarah, looking hesitant and apologetic. “Hello, Sarah.”

  Sarah reached out her hands, but Emily did not take them right away. Their eyes held. “Sarah, I … said some things to you the last time I saw you—”

  “That was nearly three years ago. I know why you said them, Emily.”

  Emily nodded, taking her hands, then embracing Sarah. The two women hugged tightly for a moment, and Sarah could smell strong perfume.

  “Emily, come inside,” Sarah told her then.

  “No,” the woman answered quickly. She pulled back and looked up at Caleb. “I just came to say a quick hello and to make sure you two were still all right. I … I can’t come in. I shouldn’t even be here.”

  Caleb frowned. “Why not? We’re friends.”

  She fidgeted nervously with a handkerchief. “You don’t want to go saying that in public, Caleb Sax. You’re in enough trouble just being an Indian. You want to keep your family name respectable and not do anything to tarnish Sarah’s reputation.”

  “I’ll come and see my friends whenever I want,” Caleb returned. “And where in hell have you been? We’ve both been worried about you. We’ve wondered about you often, Emily. You left San Felipe not long after the war was over. I know because I tried to find you.”

  She sighed and nodded. “I had to leave. I couldn’t stand walking down the street and seeing that little cabin where Howard and I had lived.” She blinked back tears. “I went back to New Orleans.”

  “And to prostitution,” Caleb said. It was more a statement than a question.

  Emily met his eyes. “Why not? It’s what I’m made for.”

  “Don’t talk stupid,” Caleb answered. “You can come here and live with us if you want.”

  She laughed, a harsh ring to the laughter and a bitterness in her eyes. “You don’t need that kind of gossip, my friend. I am where I was meant to be, and I don’t have many years of that left. I’m not much for looks anymore, Lord knows. A hard life can make an old woman of you fast.” She sighed and looked down again. “At any rate, I actually missed Texas. I came back with several pretty young things to set up my own … uh … boarding house, so to speak. It’s a very pleasant place for a single man to stay—or a married man who isn’t finding comfort in his own bed.” She looked wryly at Sarah. “I don’t suppose I’d be lucky enough to find out your husband has such a problem,” she added with a crooked smile.

  Sarah blushed and Emily laughed. “That’s what I thought.” She looked up at Caleb. “I’m back in San Felipe. Of course, I had to come here and see if you two were all right. God knows you can’t come and see me. Don’t you dare even try. If you’re really my friends, don’t cause me agony by coming to see me and creating problems for yourselves. If you see me in town, don’t act like you even know me.”

  “Emily, that’s ridiculous,” Sarah told her.

  “No it isn’t. Please.” She looked up at Caleb again. “Promise me. Once in a while I’ll find a way to come here and visit, after dark like I’m doing now. I can trust my driver not to talk.”

  Caleb glanced at the man, who just sat staring ahead. He looked back at Emily. “I’m sorry about Howard, Emily. I wanted the chance to tell you that, but when I tried to come and see you, you had already left, and I had no idea where you went.”

  Her eyes teared, but she held her chin up as though undaunted. “I had him for a while. That’s more than I ever thought I would get before I met him. I’m lucky to have had that much.” She swallowed. “It’s Howard I feel bad about, not myself. I’ll survive like I always have.” She held his eyes. “How about you? The war took its toll on everyone. How are you getting along?”

  Caleb shrugged. “Money is tight. I’m feeling the squeeze from the Indian haters, having a little trouble selling my crops and horses.”

  She closed her eyes and sighed. “I was afraid of that.” She studied the blue eyes. “But there’s more, isn’t there?” She looked past him. “Your family still intact?”

  His lips tightened and his jaw flexed. He couldn’t bring himself to say it. Sarah put an arm around his waist. “We lost Tom … at the Alamo.”

  Pain moved over Emily’s face. She knew full well how important Tom was to Caleb, remembered how the paralyzed, bedridden Caleb she had once cared for talked constantly about his little Indian boy who lived with the Cheyenne and who he was going to go and get when he got well. Tom had been everything to Caleb then. She swallowed a lump in her throat, putting a hand on his arm. “My God, I’m so sorry, Caleb.”

  He nodded, visibly shaken. “We’re all very sorry about a lot of things. It’s over. Life goes on, I guess. We just keep doing the best we can.”

  “Lynda is married to Jess Purnell,” Sarah spoke up, wanting to change the subject. “Do you remember we told you about him when we stayed at San Felipe?”

  “Yes. I’m glad.”

  “They’re down by the river with Cale. Lynda is pregnant again. James is six now. Please come inside and see him, Emily.”

  “No.” She looked at Caleb. “I can’t express enough how sorry I am about Tom. I’ll try to keep you informed on what’s happening in town, Caleb. There is an awful lot of talk about the Indians. Lamar is rebuilding the Texas army with the specific intention of rooting out all Comanche and Cherokee. I think he’s more intent on getting rid of the peaceful Cherokee than he is the Comanche, just because a lot of the Cherokee own land. That same thinking could apply to you. Your only saving grace is that you’re half white and your wife is white, and you were one of the original settlers under Austin. But Austin is dead now, and Houston has lost a lot of his power. The people don’t seem to give a damn that he led Texas to freedom.”

  “Or that my husband himself fought at San Jacinto,” Sarah added angrily. “How dare they even suggest—”

  Caleb gave her a squeeze. “Never mind, Sarah. I’ve been expecting it.” He looked out over the distant hills. “I’ve been expecting it.”

  Emily embraced them both together. “You have each other. That’s all that’s important. Remember that. If I can do anything to help, you know I will.” She pulled away. “I’ve got to go.”

  “You’ll be going back in the dark. Please stay the night, Emily. Who is going to know?”

  “We can’t take the chance. I love you both. I’m glad you’re all right.” She turned and hurried back to the carriage.

  “Emily, don’t do it. Stay with us,” Caleb called out, leaving Sarah and walking toward the carriage.

  She just laughed. “Don’t ever worry about me, Caleb Sax. Emily Stoner does just fine. You have enough worries.” She blew him a kiss and climbed in. The carriage clattered away. Caleb watched after it, remembering another time; a tall, young girl with haunting eyes, standing next to her preacher father who made her dress in long-sleeved and high-necked dresses, with gloves and hat, even in the hottest weather, so that no man would look upon her and lead her to sin.

  Byron Clawson waited until his guest sipped more after-dinner wine. He had heard of Marston Biehl, a lawyer practicing in the new capital of the Republic of Texas. The man was in St. Louis on business. What better man to invite to dinner? Byron had far too much unsettled business in Texas.

  “This is very fine wine,” Biehl told the man. “It was kind of you, Mister Clawson, to invite me into your home.”

  Byron set down his own glass. The table at which they sat was long, but only the two men sat there. Byron’s wife had retired to her sitting room. The Clawsons had little in common nowadays. His wife, Jayne, was the daughter of a local merchant, whose inheritance had been large enough to make up for the woman’s plain looks and personality. He supposed they balanced each other, which was the only reason they were still together. She married Byron only beca
use she was afraid if she didn’t, she would never find a husband at all; he married her for money and social acceptance. Married men always fared better in politics. Married men with a family did even better, but Jayne had never given him children. It surely was her fault for being so cold in bed; things between them had gotten so that his only sexual enjoyment was with the local prostitutes. He had always preferred prostitutes. They were the only ones who understood his sexual needs. Jayne had long ago taken her own bedroom, but in the public eye they both put on a grand show of the happily married couple.

  Still, it hadn’t helped his political career the way he’d hoped. He had not won election to any state or local office, and in his own arrogant mind he simply could not imagine why. With all his money, he still did not have the ultimate power he would like to have. Maybe he could find that power somehow through his new connections to this place called Texas.

  In the meantime he would keep his wife. She was relatively easy to live with. They simply didn’t speak to each other; she never stopped him from visiting the prostitutes and she enjoyed spending his money. Besides, he did not want the embarrassment of another divorce. He’d spent too many years working at pushing his divorce from Sarah Sax under the rug and out of the public’s mind. Some of his business associates didn’t even know about that first marriage; including the prominent businessman he was now entertaining.

  “Only the best for my guests,” Byron said aloud. “And as I told you, my invitation is partially business, Mister Biehl. I just thought it good manners to wait until you were finished with your meal.”

  Biehl smiled. “Well, that was an excellent supper.” He patted his stomach. “Now, what can I do for you in the way of business?”

  Byron rose. “Come into my private office, Mister Biehl. I have some fine cigars. Bring your wine along.”