Sabria wiped away the tears she hadn’t even known had fallen before shedding the shawl around her shoulders. “Jai, you couldn’t have stopped Melanie from falling for you when you had no idea who or what you are.”
“She needed me.”
Sabria crossed the hardwood floor to place her hand on the corded muscles in Jai’s back. His skin felt dangerously hot beneath her fingertips “She needed you and you were there for her. We don’t get to choose our destiny, Jai.” She wrapped her arms around him and pressed her face against his back. “I’m truly sorry Melanie is gone and I hate to see you in so much pain. I know you probably need some space, but we’re running out of time, Jai, and I need you.”
Chapter Five
Jai felt Sabria’s tears on his back before he pulled away to face her. “Melanie’s funeral is taking place in less than an hour. I need to be there.”
Sabria gave him an understanding nod. “Okay. I’ll go with you.”
“No. I need to do this, say goodbye. Alone.” Jai saw the hurt in Sabria’s eyes when his words came out harsher than intended, but he was in too much pain himself to even attempt to smooth things over. “I’m going to take a shower and go.”
“All right,” Sabria said, stepping back from him. She tore her gaze from his to glance at the timekeeper, but not before Jai saw the sheen of more tears in her eyes.
“How much time is left?” Jai asked, wishing he could just hold her the way he wanted to if guilt and heartache wasn’t weighing every inch of him down.
Sabria glanced at her watch and shrugged. “This thing never gives the precise moment we’re out of time, but I’d say roughly less than twelve hours, maybe less. We’ve never waited this long to reignite our bond. I’ll just go back to my hotel.”
“Stay here and wait for me,” Jai said, not wanting her to leave. His ravenous desire for her and the conflicting sadness making him want to push her away was tearing at his mind, driving him a little crazy. “I’m going to shower, change and go.”
“Okay.” Sabria glanced around. “Do you have anything to read? A television?”
“I’ve got both in my bedroom. Come with me and I’ll show you.”
Sabria’s boots clicked behind him as she followed him into his bedroom. Jai strode over to the drawn curtains, opened them and pointed to the flat screen to his left. “Television.” He gestured toward the stack of books by his bed. “Books.”
“Thank you,” Sabria said with a small smile.
“Need anything else before I hit the shower?”
Sabria’s gaze skated across his bare chest. “No.”
Jai knew better as she grabbed the remote off his nightstand and turned on the television. He went into the bathroom as she started flipping through channels.
Twenty minutes later, he came back into the bedroom to find Sabria sleeping on his bed. He looked at her lying on his comforter, overwhelmed by her beauty and his love for her, remembering all of the moments he’d stood over her sleeping and thought the exact same things.
He wanted to work through the pain wrapped around his heart and be the mate Sabria knew and needed him to be. He just couldn’t figure out how to do it when he felt so fractured inside.
Jai dropped the towel slung around his hips on the bed and moved to his dresser. He opened the drawer, cursing softly when the old hinges creaked. He turned to see if the noise had disturbed Sabria and found her staring at him. “Sorry.”
“I’m not,” she said as her gaze drifted over his body.
Jai almost mustered a smile while pulling on his underwear and socks. He half-expected Sabria to talk while he finished dressing in a dark suit and tie, but when he looked at her again she’d closed her eyes. He could tell she wasn’t sleeping though by the chaotic rise and fall of her chest. She was obviously on edge and wanting.
“I’ll be back soon,” Jai said.
“I’ll be here. Jai?”
“Yes?”
“It’s okay to admit that you loved her…to acknowledge you’ve lost someone you loved,” Sabria said, barely stirring.
Stunned, Jai didn’t know how to respond. He stared at her for a few seconds before leaving, hating the feeling he was letting her down just like he had Melanie.
By the time he got to the church the parking lot was full and parking on the street was scarce. He was almost fifteen minutes late to the service. Looking around the church, Jai saw familiar faces, including Sarah, Melanie’s older sister. He and Melanie had gone on a double date with Sarah and her boyfriend a few months back. Jai’s chest tightened when their gazes locked, but she surprised him by giving him a small smile and he responded in kind before looking away. He wondered how much Melanie had mentioned to her sister about their relationship.
Jai sat through the rest of the service in a numb fog. His kind had no need for funerals. The concept to Jai was beautiful and a bit barbaric. He didn’t understand why humans would willingly sit through something that would cause more grief, and yet he respected their need to celebrate the life lost with words and songs.
Finally, it was over. Jai got up off the hard pew, relieved. A sea of faces and people moved around him as he made his way toward the exit when he felt a hand on his arm.
“Jai?”
He turned to see Sarah by his side. “Hello, Sarah.”
“I’m sorry we’re meeting again under these circumstances,” Sarah said sadly.
“As am I. I’m so sorry for your loss.”
Sarah looked away from him for a moment. “Melanie will be missed by all of us. I wanted to tell you how happy you’d made her. I’d never seen her so happy.”
“Your sister made me happy too.”
Sarah dug into her purse, took a tissue and dabbed at her eyes. “I’m glad she’d found someone to love again and be loved by.” She pulled out a blue envelope from her purse. “I found this letter and I know my sister would’ve wanted you to read it.”
Jai took the letter, instantly recognizing Melanie’s flowery handwriting. “Thank you.”
“Take care of yourself, Jai,” Sarah said, surprising him again by giving him a hug.
She walked away before he could push words past the lump in his throat, leaving him to stare at the last thing he’d ever read from Melanie. Jai glanced around the elegant church that was now practically empty. He moved to the back, sat down on the pew and ripped open the letter.
Jai,
I never expected to fall in love again.
My heart felt empty and broken for so long after a horrible relationship I’ve never talked about with you because you are my future.
You told me otherwise, but I know there is someone else…someone else whom you’ve given your heart to in your past and I’m okay with that because I know just how hard it is to let go.
I know you love me in your own way and one day… Your whole heart will belong only to me.
Loving you has been nothing but a source of joy to me and I’ll never ever regret falling for you.
The part of you I have makes me whole.
Melanie
Jai blinked through the tears in his eyes to reread Melanie’s note. He drew in a deep breath, then slowly exhaled and felt some of the shards of pain ripping at his heart melt away. Melanie had accepted and loved him and he had loved her. It wasn’t the same deep, abiding love he had with Sabria, but he had loved Melanie and Sabria had helped him see that. He hadn’t wanted to acknowledge those feelings. It seemed like doing so somehow tainted his bond with his flamma, but Jai knew it didn’t.
A weight lifted off him as he folded the letter and put it in his breast pocket. There was still sadness, a sense of loss, but the guilt he’d been unable to shake was gone.
Jai got up from the pew. He walked to the front of the church, placed his hand on Melanie’s coffin and said a final silent goodbye. When he finished, the tightness in his chest dissipated a little more with each step toward the cathedral door.
It was time to go home to the woman who continued to ma
ke him a better man.
* * * *
Sabria woke up drenched with sweat, struggling to breathe. The lingering heat in Jai’s place and within her was suffocating. She moaned in distress, twisting on the comforter.
It was happening.
The familiar raw heat built within her, making it hard to concentrate on anything other than the burn enveloping every part of her body. The process of rebirth for a phoenix wasn’t as painful as it was unsettling and disorientating. She had little control over her body once the process began.
Sabria pulled at her tank top, managing to get it off before struggling to remove her jeans. Naked except for her panties, she felt no measurable relief as tears filled her eyes. Every marking on her body glimmered and shined, beautiful and bright, confirming her transformation was beginning. Sabria vaguely wondered where Jai was as she shivered and shook on top of the comforter. She hoped he’d be back. Soon, the process of rebirth would start for him too, if it hadn’t already.
It was so unfair.
They’d been so close to reigniting their bond. Now, she would probably transform without seeing him again. She’d find herself in another place, with a new body, with possibly no recollection of Jai or an innate sense of urgency to search and find him all over again.
Sabria slammed her balled fists on top of the bed. Everything had been so messed up this time. She and Jai hadn’t even cleared away any evidence of their short existence. There was surprisingly little left in her hotel room, but still. She hated leaving any loose ends and the biggest loose end was between her and Jai.
“No. Please, no. Jai…”
Sabria closed her eyes, curled into a ball and cried, letting grief overtake her.
“Shh! I’m here, Sabria. I’m so sorry I left you like this.”
She cried harder, thinking she was imagining his voice in her head, when she felt strong warm hands on her back. Sabria opened her eyes, blinked through tears to see Jai quickly stripping from his clothes. “Jai? Are you really here?”
Fully naked, he came to her on the bed and Sabria reached out a shaky hand to touch him.
“I’m here for you,” Jai said, moving over her.
Sabria sobbed with joy as he kissed her. She wrapped her legs around his waist. “Please.” Sabria wanted to say more, but she simply couldn’t think as the intensity of the burn within her increased. She didn’t even react when Jai ripped her panties off her.
“I know, baby. There’s no time for foreplay, but I will make that up to you later,” Jai said against her temple.
Sabria did cry out when he took her in one hard thrust, giving her no time to adjust to his thick cock buried to the hilt inside her. She clawed at his back, drawing blood as he began moving hard, fast and deeper than she would’ve normally liked the first time back with him. She gasped, overwhelmed by the weight of him pressing into her, the feel of his cock stretching her. Jai paused for a moment and Sabria dug her fingernails into his skin, barely breathing, shuddering with pleasure as she milked his thick cock with the walls of her pussy.
“You are mine, Sabria. Now and forever.” His breath felt hot against her face.
“Yes.” Her voice was a ragged moan. “Always. Please, Jai, claim me, make me yours, now and forever all over again.” Her markings burned brighter and Sabria moaned with delight when he began to move again as even more tears slid down her cheeks. “I’m changing, Jai.”
She barely recognized her own hoarse voice as Jai pinned her feverish body beneath his, riding her harder, hammering her with his lust and need. Rivulets of blood dripped down his flanks where she’d scratched him and tiny droplets of it fell onto Sabria’s sweat-drenched skin.
“Stay with me, Bri,” Jai ground out.
“I can’t stop it,” Sabria panted. The two of them were covered in sweat. Sabria stared up into Jai’s eyes, feeling her pleasure point reaching overload. “I love you, Jai. Always and forever. Ashes to flames.”
Saying those words took all her strength. She closed her eyes as Jai rocked her, loved her, fucked her and gave her what she’d been craving since she’d begun her search for him.
“No!” Jai slammed into her in borderline brutal fashion. “Stay with me, dammit!”
Sabria arched her back and screamed as her orgasm ignited a million little flames over and within her entire body. She cried out again when she felt Jai come moments later, welcoming the fiery intensity of it. He continued moving inside her, barely slowing down, and his passion and hers blended into one flame, flickering over them both, consuming everything all at once. Then…darkness.
* * * *
“Sabria?”
Jai.
“Sabria, please open your eyes.”
She struggled to do as Jai requested, but it felt like she was disconnected from her body.
“Come on. Do it now.”
Sabria opened her eyes to see Jai smiling at her. Joy filled her soul as she smiled back. “Hi.”
“Hi.” Jai bent down to kiss her forehead. “Are you all right, flamma?”
Sabria gingerly tried to move and found she could. “I—I think so.” She wrapped her arm around Jai and he cradled her body to his. “I thought I’d lost you again.”
“I know. I did too.”
Sabria pulled back to look at him. “How…how is this possible? I was in the process of transforming.”
“Let’s not question it.” Jai kissed her lips. “You’re here with me and I just want to enjoy every minute we have together.”
“Me too.” Sabria snuggled against him. “I was so afraid I was going to transform before you got back. It was killing me to know I was going to leave you without knowing if you were going to be okay.”
“I’ve made peace with what happened and you had a big part in that,” Jai said, tightening his arms around her. “Thank you for helping me see that it was okay to love her under the circumstances. I love you even more for it.”
“And I love you even more because of the love and care you had for Melanie.”
Sabria giggled when Jai rolled over her and nipped her collarbone. “Do you have any idea how much I love you?” Jai asked.
“I do,” Sabria said with a huge smile.
“Are you sure you’re okay?” He searched her face. “I know I was anything but gentle with you. I’m sorry.”
Sabria pressed her finger to his lips. “Don’t apologize. You know I like it a little rough.”
Jai laughed. “I know how you like it, but that was over the top for even us.”
“Well, if you must know…I am sore.” Sabria loved the way Jai’s eyes darkened when she ground her hips against him in wanton fashion.
“You are?”
“Yes.” She ran her fingers over his jawline. The concern on his handsome face delighted her.
“Where?”
Sabria dropped her hand from his face and slid it between them to cup her wet pussy. “Here.”
Jai grinned as he moved lower over her body. “I think I have just the thing”—he parted her thighs and pressed a kiss on her swollen pussy lips—“to make you feel better.”
Sabria moaned as his tongue laved her sensitive flesh. Her eyelids fluttered closed as she gripped his bald head. She breathed Jai’s name as he gently and tenderly kissed, licked and soothed away the ravages of their passion with his tongue, thankful for the time they were given to love and be loved by one another.
Coming Soon from Totally Bound Publishing:
What’s Her Secret?
Last Call
Crissy Smith
Released 8th November 2013
Excerpt
Chapter One
“Last call! Last call!” Piper Maxwell shouted.
Jace Anderson heard the familiar words from his place at the cash register behind the bar and his blood started to pump in anticipation. His body was alive with awareness of what was to come. He turned his head to the woman who’d made the announcement. His bar manager Piper Maxwell nodded to the two bartenders while
smiling at his patrons. This was the best part of the evening for him. Jace and Piper, alone, the opportunity he craved night after night.
He took the rag out of his back pocket and stepped around the bar into the seating section. He started to wipe down the empty tables to help clean up for the night. The dark wood table tops gleamed in the bar light. Smooth, quiet jazz flowed through air and comforted those within. The stained but clean oak floors had been battered but continued to hold strong.
From any seat in the house, the windowed front offered the patrons a spectacular view of the beach yards away.
Jace had opened the bar only a year ago but it was now home. Everything he had ever wanted in his life wrapped into one place. The people who worked for him were his family. The woman currently ringing up the last of the patrons’ tabs… He shook his head. Piper was one of a kind.
The closing procedures only took half an hour. He had a very efficient staff—they were well trained and all took care and helped one another. The kitchen had been shut down two hours ago so the small staff in the back had already cleaned up their stations and gone for the night. The four remaining employees, his two bartenders and two waitresses, finished up and happily waved good night.
It had been a busy shift. Steady business. He couldn’t ask for much more. Even in a struggling economy he still managed to make money.
Lifting the last stool onto the table top, he glanced out the front window and saw the moon shining bright over the water. The astounding sight always made his breath catch.
He’d moved to Blue Cove, California after his last tour of duty. Almost fourteen months ago. He’d read about the small coastal town when he had been overseas and always promised himself he would visit. Once he’d set foot on the soft sand and watched the crystal-clear waves roll, he’d known he was home.
He’d gotten a business loan and opened Anderson’s Lounge. Anderson’s was the only bar located directly on the beach that he loved so much. He was able to serve the locals like himself as well as the few tourists who came to town.
“That’s it,” Piper told him, switching off the back lights.
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