Gate Wide Open

by M. T. Pope

  “Hello,” I said, adding a chipper, upbeat spark to my voice. Again, I didn’t not want to talk to her. I was still shook from the news that she gave me about her sickness. I was ecstatic to hear her voice again, sick and all. I cleared my throat and spoke again. “Hey, Ma!”

  “How’s Mama’s baby?” She coughed a couple of times.

  Tears flowed from my eyes freely as the realization hit me again that she wasn’t going to be around forever.

  “Now, I thought you said you were going to call me back.” She sounded a little heartbroken.

  “Oh, ah, Ma, I’ve been meaning to call you,” I said, cowering like a little boy.

  I was fumbling with various things in the kitchen as I tried to keep my composure. I wasn’t strong when it came to sickness and death.

  “I’m sorry, Ma. I-I-I’m just trying to adjust to the news you gave me. I’m trying to come and see you. As soon as I get some stuff straight over here, I’m going to fly right out to be with you until, well, you know.”

  I couldn’t even say it. She was dying, and I was worried about how I was going to feel. I gagged a couple of times, holding back vomit, because I had just pictured her in her casket. Cold, stiff, and dead. I wasn’t ready to bury her or give her back to God.

  In the few seconds of silence on the phone, I prayed to God to have mercy and spare my mama. I didn’t pray much, but it was necessary for this situation.

  “Baby, Mama lived her life. God has been good to me. It’s just my time to go.”

  It was like she was dying right there on the phone.

  “Mama, no!” I almost screamed. Tears and snot flowed freely. I was losing it I couldn’t help but think this was payback for my malicious ways. This was the ultimate price. “You hold on, Mama. I’ll be there soon. Real soon.”

  “I will, baby. Mama will.” She hacked a couple more coughs. “Jerry, I’m over that. You never told me why you were locked up all them years.”

  I’d never really told my mother what had happened and why I’d ended up in jail for ten years. She had called me several times in jail and tried to pry it out of me, but I would immediately change the subject or fake like someone else urgently needed to use the phone. I just didn’t think she could handle the truth. I was off the chain ever since I’d come to Maryland from California and still couldn’t bring myself to let her know all about my life over here.

  “I’m sorry, Mama. It’s just complicated. Let’s just say, I got mixed up with the wrong people, and things didn’t work out for the best. I really don’t want to bore you with the details. They’re not flattering, but I’m better now. I have someone in my life that treats me right, and I’m looking forward to you meeting them really soon.”

  “So my baby found himself a man.”

  My mouth hit the floor. How did she know? “Huh?” was all that came out of my mouth.

  “Yes, Mama knows.” She giggled a little. “Jerry, you’re my only baby. I know you inside and out. Make sure he loves you and you love him. Mama, don’t believe in that type of livin’, but you are my baby, and I love you, no matter what. That’s all I am going to say about it.”

  “So, Mama…how is the family? Like Aunt Berta and them?”

  “Oh, they fine, baby.” She laughed. “They still crazy as ever, fighting and cussing and getting into all manners of trouble. Which reminds me, that crazy cousin of yours, Sherry, came by here with some cute little boy about three months ago asking about when you got out. She said she wanted to find out because she missed you and wanted to spend some time with you. She stayed with me for a week or so because she said she wanted to spend some time with me. She kept making phone calls all the time, blowing up Mama’s phone and eating up my food, so I told her she had to go. I loved that little boy, but she was a pain in the butt.”

  “Ummm, did y’all ever talk about me or anything?” I asked, trying not to be obvious.

  “Only when she asked me about where you were going to live and all that. I told her I didn’t know where you were going to live, but I gave her your number instead. I knew you told her to stay away when she called you.” Mama chuckled. “On her last day here, she asked me for some money to get her and the little boy back to Maryland. I went into my stash and gave her five hundred dollars and told her to never come back. She even had the nerve to tell me that that wasn‘t enough. That’s when Sophie came out for a visit.” She chuckled to herself.

  I did as well. Mama was as sweet as pie, but catch her the wrong way and she will conveniently lose her religion and unleash Sophie, her alter ego. Sophie was like Tyler Perry’s Madea character, but only worse. I could just imagine what she said to her or did to her. I was pretty sure she’d never set foot in my mom’s house again.

  “Oh, and, baby, she kept calling you James, for some reason.”

  “Ha-ha-ha.” I laughed nervously. “Ma, you know she crazy as a bed bug. Ever since we were little and she fell off my swing set backwards and hit her head on cement, she’s never been the same.”

  We both laughed at that one.

  I heard Wallace getting out of the shower and had to cut the conversation short. “Well, all right, Ma. I have to go get in the shower and get into bed for tomorrow. I have a busy day tomorrow.”

  “Oh, okay, baby. Mama loves her some Jerry.”

  “And Jerry loves him some Mama.” We both blew kisses into the phone and hung up.

  Just as I did, I heard the bathroom door open and heard Wallace’s footsteps going toward the bedroom.

  I began to scramble around the kitchen, getting things together. My man was expecting a hot meal, and I was going to give it to him. I quickly threw some garlic sticks in the oven with the potatoes and green beans for the last couple of minutes and proceeded to take the now done steaks off the grill.

  “Umm, boy!”

  Wallace shuffled into the kitchen with a wife-beater and some boxers and some chocolate, furry-type slippers I’d bought him. “My baby got it banging up in here.”

  I smiled with delight because, every time he called me baby, my world seemed to light up.

  “All right, baby, go into the dining room, and I will be right in with the food.” He kissed me on the cheek and walked off toward the dining room.

  I took out some candles and champagne glasses and put them on the dining room table, as well as our dinnerware. He had already turned on the digital music player, and the house filled with jazz and calypso. I fixed our plates and made my way to the dining room, where we sat across from each other. The lights were dimmed, and the light from the candle flickered on the walls.

  As we both savored our meals, we sat and just gazed into each other’s eyes. My shenanigans of the day faded away with each second of being in his presence. I felt safe and loved.

  My mind temporarily drifted to Mama’s sickness and how I was going to handle it. It seemed like I was losing one lover for another. I couldn’t compare the two, but that’s what it seemed like. I didn’t want to lose either. I was brokenhearted by Mama’s illness and awakened emotionally by Wallace’s love toward me. I pushed it all back down inside and finished my meal with my man.

  After we finished eating and playing footsie under the table, Wallace cleared the table while I went into the living room and started the fireplace. I moved the table back out of the way, spread out a fur-type blanket a foot or two away from the fire, and sat down Indian-style with my side to the fire.

  Wallace walked in with a bowl of ice cream and two spoons and did the same. He began to feed me ice cream slowly by the spoonful. Chocolate peanut butter ice cream was one of my favorites, and he knew it. After he fed me a couple of spoonfuls, we then took turns feeding each other until it was all gone.

  He sat the bowl on the table and crawled back over to me on his hands and knees and starting nibbling on my ear. He knew this was my spot. I was weak after his first lick.

  He moved around to my mouth and kissed me deep and long. It was as if he was trying to take my breath away, lingering on m
y bottom lip for a few seconds. He slowly pushed me back and kissed my neck.

  I had on a thin white wife-beater, which he ripped off slowly, exposing my slightly chiseled chest. He worked his way down to my navel, causing me to be tickled with laughter. He stopped there and took my hand in his and worked each finger into his mouth, sending me into a sexual fever. I was hot all over.

  After that, Wallace pulled down my pajama shorts and worked my dick to a hard, stiff erection. He then pulled himself up to where I was and laid halfway on me and halfway off. He kissed me and jerked my dick at the same time.

  My hands caressed his head and neck as he continued to work me to an orgasm. I came hard as he continued to kiss me all over.

  He laid his head on my chest until my breathing had slowed down. “I love you,” he whispered into my ear and kissed me on the cheek.

  He got up and came back with a wet washcloth and cleaned me and himself up, and we drifted off to sleep right there on the floor.

  Chapter 28

  Shawn

  Rock My World

  December 15th, 2018, 1:23 P.M.

  I was still seething hot when I walked into my office. I couldn’t believe my father did that shit to his family. It was like he was still trying to hurt us from the grave. To top it off, the detective on my father‘s case just called and told me that James had a solid alibi for the night of my father’s murder.

  I flopped down in my chair and massaged my aching temples. I had a shitload of cases I was working on, and all this shit going on in my personal life. It was enough to make me wanna jump off the top of the building. I didn’t know what I was going to do if anything else happened today. My ass just might go postal and kill everybody up in this muthafucka. I was thinking more and more irrationally as the days passed. Dealing with this faggot-ass James and all his bullshit was making me wanna say, “Fuck it!” and fuck him and get it over with. That’s what he wanted anyways. Why not go back to fucking him? Maybe he will leave me and Mona alone after I give him one last fuck.

  I couldn’t blame him though. I was a good-looking man. Even at the age of forty-five I had no gray hair or wrinkles to be seen. I was toned and had a little muscle to flex with. Mona couldn’t keep her hands off me at night. I was a wanted man, and I knew it. Too bad I couldn’t have my cake and eat it too. I was so glad I had a stronger willpower than I had ten years ago, because I would have fucked James by now. Then again, I couldn’t give all the credit to my willpower, because every time I looked at my wife and kids, I knew I would be worse off without them. Love for my family was holding me together.

  Buzzz!

  “Mr. Black, you have a call on line two. It’s Mona.”

  “Hey, baby, I was just calling to see how your day was going.”

  This is my baby all day long. How can I think about messing around on her again? Here she is checking up on me at work. I couldn’t ask for a better wife than her.

  “Baby, everything is everything. I am so glad to hear your voice. I can’t wait to marry you again.”

  I was genuinely excited about renewing our vows. I couldn’t let the death of my father and all the shit James was dragging me through distract me from this any longer. “I was thinking about setting up a second honeymoon as well. You know it’s always better the second time around.”

  “Oh, baby, can we go to Cancún or Paris?” Mona squealed into the phone like she was a kid getting ready to get a Happy Meal.

  “Sure, baby. Whatever you want. It’s going to be all about you.”

  “Wow! Baby, I can’t believe in a couple of weeks we will be going away on a second honeymoon. I gotta tell Momma the good news. I will see you when you get home.”

  “Okay, snookums. See you then.”

  “Oh, and, Shawn, there will be something special waiting on you when you get here.” Mona blew a kiss into the phone and then hung up.

  I didn’t have to be a rocket scientist to figure this one out. I was still a little apprehensive about the whole sex thing, but I again shrugged it off, because I knew Mona only called James’ name out the other night because of the stress he was putting us through yet again. I was hoping.

  I pushed the thought of James and his mess to the back of my mind and began to concentrate on my work.

  As I was heading out of my office, my phone started to ring. I was going to ignore it, but something told me to answer it, it could be important.

  “Mr. Black speaking.”

  “Well, well, well. You can’t call nobody?” James sneered into the phone then laughed at the tired, played-out pimp line he just spat.

  “I’m on my way home to my wife and kids. What do you want now? I hope it ain’t sex, because that is out of the question.” I decided I would take a stand and call his bluff. Maybe telling the kids the truth would make life a little easier.

  “I was calling to ask you to meet me at The Stable.”

  “Fuck, no,” I almost yelled into the phone. It was there that all this shit got me in trouble in the first place. I wasn’t about to go there again.

  “I wouldn’t be so quick to say no. I have someone I want you to meet, and I don’t think Mona would be happy if we pulled up at your house and introduced the two of you.”

  “Look, this better not be no game, James, because if it is, I will not hesitate in laying hands on you, if you know what I mean.”

  “Nigga, please! Your over-easy ass ain’t gonna do shit. Meet me there in a half hour.” Click.

  I looked at the phone in disbelief. This dude was still crazy as ever. I didn’t even know why I was shocked.

  I pulled up to the parking lot beside the restaurant and paid the parking attendant. Just before I walked in, I called Mona and told her that I would be late coming home because of a very important case I was finishing up. Since I was now a partner at the firm, Mona knew I was really serious about my cases. She said she would wait up and be ready to rock my world. I was looking forward to it and couldn’t wait to get my rocks off.

  My mind was racing, trying to figure out who in the hell did James want me to meet. I walked in the restaurant and made my way to the table where he was seated. From the distance, I could see a lady with her back turned toward me and a little boy about the same age as Diana. I had to think he looked quite familiar.

  When James waved me over, the lady at the table turned around, and so did the little boy. It was my old secretary, Sherry.

  What in the hell is she doing here?

  Then all of a sudden, the little boy jumped up and ran toward me screaming, “Daddy! Daddy!”

  My facial expression said it all. I was in complete shock and awe. This little boy couldn’t have been my son. Then it all hit me. I had fucked Sherry with a rubber that broke when we had sex in my office. It was the only way to get her to drop the charges she had against Mona.

  I pulled out the chair and went to sit down, missing it completely. This news was rocking my world, and there was nothing I could do about it. James had a big smile on his face the whole time. Embarrassed and awestruck, I made another attempt to sit in my chair.

  The waiter came over and asked if everything was okay.

  No, muthafucka. I just found out I have a son I didn’t know about. I just asked for a glass of water to refresh my now dry mouth and loosened my necktie, because it was getting increasingly hot in the place.

  After a couple of seconds, Sherry said, “First, I wanna say I’m sorry. I would have and should have told you about Li’l Shawn a long time ago. I just couldn’t bring myself to do it. I know it’s selfish, but I wanted to leave you and your family alone.”

  I just glanced at her, Li’l Shawn, and James like I was in the twilight zone or something. I was totally gone. I couldn’t believe this was happening to me. Just when I thought shit in my life was bad, here comes something else. “How do you know he’s mine?”

  I knew it sounded so cliché as it came out of my mouth. Here I was, another black man denying fatherhood. It came out so natural, but I truly d
idn’t mean it that way. I was just in shock. He looked like me when I was a child, but I still wasn’t sure. This shit is just too crazy.

  “Um, um, I mean, are you sure?”

  “Shawn, you are the only one I had sex with around the time I found out I was pregnant. Even though I did go about this the wrong way, I’m not a slut like you might think,” she said, looking me in my eyes.

  I looked at the little boy apologetically. “Well, I never said that. I’m just trying to get clarity.”

  “I don’t blame you. If I was in your shoes, I probably would be asking the same questions too.” She paused. “We can take a DNA test if you want to.”

  “Most definitely.”

  “Mommy, I need to go to the bathroom.”

  Immediately after Li’l Shawn and Sherry got up and made their way to the bathroom, James said, “Look, Shawn, you can make this easy on all of us. Just do what we ask, and Ms. Mona doesn’t have to know a thing about Li’l Shawn.”

  “Are you serious? You are really willing to pimp me out for the sake of a kid and the happiness of my family?”

  “Hell yeah.” James laughed to himself.

  I wanted to bash his face in right then and there.

  “This shit is just too good to pass up on.”

  Again, my mind wandered to hurting him badly. I just sat there and pondered his proposition.

  “Let’s say I go for this deal, what does it consist of?” I folded my arms against my chest and sat back waiting for the details.

  “All you have to do is make me happy with some sex and money every now and then. And Sherry is going to need two thousand in child support every month.”

  “I’ll think about.” I drank a little bit of my water.

  “Well, don’t think about it too long, because my fingers have a mind of their own and I would hate to slip up and call your house and let Li’l Shawn ask for his daddy himself.”

  Sherry, and Li’l Shawn came back from the bathroom, and again Li’l Shawn hugged me before he sat down beside his mom.

  “Sherry, how did he know who I was when I got here?”