Gate Wide Open

by M. T. Pope

  I looked on in sheer embarrassment. Here I was in a hospital bed with a bandaged up head. Mona just looked at me and smiled, causing me to do the same.

  My mother brought me over Alex and then Ashley, and I held my bundles of joy in my arms. The tears flowed freely. I was a father. A very proud father. I posed while my mom took pictures of me holding my babies. It was the proudest day of my life, bandaged head and all.

  I laughed as I looked back on it, but that was then, and this is now. When Mona had called the day of the paternity results and told me that I wasn’t their biological father, something in me changed. I really hadn’t realized that until now.

  I picked up a picture of my family off my desk. We had taken this picture about three months ago. All dressed in white, we all were smiling, showing our pearly whites.

  I, on the other hand, wasn’t smiling on the inside. I still had unrest in me. I was still a liar and I knew it. I wasn’t happy that James had what I wanted all my life. Offspring. Children. Little versions of me.

  The bad thing about it is, he didn’t even want them. I couldn’t prove it, but I was sure of it. He was a selfish SOB who only cared about materialistic gain, and that proved it for me.

  I gently placed the picture back down on the desk where it belonged. I looked across my desk at the picture of my parents and frowned. I had suppressed so much anger and hurt over the years.

  Some moments came across as good times, maybe even great times, but it was mostly just me and my mom doing our thing together. My father was always busy grading papers for his students and preparing assignments. Even in the summertime, he would teach school. I would ask if daddy was coming with us on our trips, and my mom would say he was making a living for us. I believed everything she told me, because she was my mom, and she never lied to me.

  Truth was, the busier he was, the less I saw of him, which was a huge relief for me, knowing what we did when he did have the time to spend with me. That shit surely wasn’t quality time to me. It was hell. I’ll tell you that.

  He’s gone now. Dead. Worm food. He’d never apologized for any of it, but it’s not like it would’ve helped me now anyway. I was fucked up for sure.

  “It is what it is.” I shrugged my shoulders in defeat. “Time for me to start looking ahead.” I turned toward my computer and continued with my workday.

  Two hours later, I was out again with Li’l Shawn after work and was enjoying spending time with him. Who could have thought I would actually have a child I didn’t know about? I mean, I loved all my children, but there is just something about having a biological connection with your offspring that really made a difference to me.

  I had taken him to the National Aquarium, the Science Center, National Great Blacks in Wax Museum, and various other attractions around Baltimore, and he was loving every minute of it.

  I was asking him questions, and he was asking me questions too.

  “Are you and my mom getting married? Do I have any brothers and sisters? Can I live with you? Why did you leave my mother?”

  They were all so overwhelming, I didn’t know how to respond. I told him I would explain it to him later on, and he reluctantly agreed. I was hoping he wouldn’t pressure me anymore about it until I told Mona about him. I was still trying to figure that one out. How in the hell do you do that? I know I pulled back emotionally when she told me that none of our children were biologically mine. I just didn’t know when to tell her or how. When is a good time to spring that kind of news on someone? I was still getting used to it my damn self.

  I pulled up to the apartment complex where they were staying and called Sherry’s phone, letting her know I was outside with Lil Shawn. I hated to see him go, but I had to mosey on home to my wife and kids. I so wanted him to be a part of the family I was leaving him to go home to. But I had to prep Mona first, just to see where her head was.

  Sherry sashayed out of the house in slippers and rollers just like a ghetto queen. I handed her a check for two grand out of my car window with the promise of the rest the next week. Then I popped the trunk to my car, so she could also grab the Wal-Mart bags Li’l Shawn and I accumulated.

  Christmas Day was just around the corner, so we had made a quick stop at Wal-Mart on Route 40. I let him go for it in the toy and electronic departments. He ended up spending about three hundred dollars. I was happy to see his smiling face. It must have been his first time really having a Christmas, because he was so fidgety, and he kept on thanking me. There was no telling who she had him around, and where she dragged him to.

  I pulled up to the house with the hope that I could pick Mona’s brain. I got out of the car and made my way into the house.

  I noticed that the lights in the dining room were on, and soft R&B music was playing. I cautiously walked into the dining room, not knowing what to expect.

  “Hey, baby,” Mona said as she seductively walked up to me in a swaggered strut.

  She was looking hot in a see-through pink robe that had fur around the edges. I could see she had on my favorite teddy, the one that exposed most of her breasts.

  She took my briefcase out of my hand and placed it in a corner. She then pulled me by the hand and led me to the table, which was candle-lit. “I hope you will enjoy this night as much as I did planning it. I know you’ve had it hard this week at the office, and I wanted to reward you for all the hard work you do to keep this family together.”

  I just looked at her with the fake if-you-only-knew smile as she unveiled a dinner fit for a king. She had fried chicken, baked macaroni and cheese, candied yams, homemade rolls, collard greens, and my favorite dessert, Oreo cheesecake.

  She made a plate, sat on my lap, and proceeded to feed it to me spoonful by spoonful.

  I was enjoying the food and the view of her chest as she fed me my meal. I wasn’t prepared for this. Now how can I bring up the idea of “adopting” a kid right now? It wasn’t the right time.

  Speaking of kids, she must’ve dropped the kids off at my mom’s house. They usually went over her house to make cookies and help her decorate the house around this time.

  After Mona finished feeding me, she led me upstairs, where she had me strip out of my clothes and step into our Jacuzzi tub that had been filled to the top and had scented candles around it.

  I stepped in the tub and sat down. She disrobed and immediately did the same. She sat in front of me and took my feet into her hands and massaged each one, cracking my toes in the process. Then she began to work her way up to my calves, kneading them like dough. I lay my head back and enjoyed the treatment she was giving me.

  After a couple intense minutes of that, she worked her way up to the most important muscle of them all. My dick.

  I lifted my head up and watched as she massaged it till it was hard as steel. Her eyes met mine, and we drew together like two magnets, kissing hard and aggressively like it was our last night together.

  She broke the kiss as she went down on my dick. Mind you, my lower half was underwater. She went down under the water and started giving me a blowjob that had me moaning loudly. She was doing a damn good job under the water, not coming up for long periods of time. I didn’t know she could hold her breath for so long.

  She came up just as I was about to cum. “Not yet, baby,” she said, pulling herself up and positioning herself on my dick. “I wanna ride you home, daddy.”

  We’d never fucked in the tub, and I was enjoying this experience totally.

  “Whatever, baby.” I moaned as she started pumping up and down on me like a jackhammer. “Do the damn thing.”

  She was bouncing so hard, water was flying everywhere, even blowing some of the candles out. I was in heaven.

  We came at two different times, her first, then me, and we collapsed in the tub, her on top of me.

  “Damn, baby!” I said to her as her head lay on my chest. “We gotta do this shit again.”

  “Sure, Shawn. This is all yours.” She opened her legs and rubbed herself feverishly.


  We got out of the tub, dried each other off, made our way into the bedroom and lay in the bed, spooning like we always did. I decided to test the waters while she was in a loving mode.

  “Baby,” I whispered into her ear.

  “Huh?”

  “You ever think Diana is getting lonely?”

  “What you mean, Shawn?”

  “I was thinking today that maybe we should adopt a child around Diana’s age. I’ve been noticing that Alex and Ashley are not paying her as much attention as they used to. I think it would be nice to adopt someone that Diana could play with.”

  “Baby, why are you thinking about this all of a sudden?”

  “Well, it wasn’t all of a sudden. I’ve been thinking about this for a while now. I know we’re getting older, that you would probably not physically want to have another baby.”

  “Really?” She turned toward me, a puzzled look on her face. “Are you sure?”

  “Yeah. With Alex and Ashley about to go off to college in two years, Diana is going to get quite lonely in the house by herself.”

  “Well, let’s think about it.” She kissed me on the lips. “We can talk about it more after we renew our vows and come back from our trip.”

  I was bursting inside with excitement. The only problem was getting Sherry to agree to give custody of Li’l Shawn to me and keep her maternity of him a secret.

  I began kissing Mona again as the excitement had made me horny again. I mounted her again and proceeded to fuck her brains out.

  Chapter 32

  James

  Questions

  December 20th, 2018, 8:56 P.M.

  I walked into the house, totally exhausted and ready to fuck or get fucked, whichever was fine with me. As soon as I got in the door, I noticed Wallace sitting in the living room listening to jazz music playing. He had brought a Christmas tree and everything while I was gone. Everything was so festive. It had been a minute since I’d experienced Christmas like this. It made me miss my mother, who I needed to call more often, since she was getting up there in age. I needed to take care of her more, maybe even bring her here to live with me. I know it seemed like I had no heart or feelings, but I was a human being. I had a heart. It was just caked under hurt and pain that I never dealt with. I was beginning to see that I was worthy of love and I was able to give it too.

  Somehow, in a short time, Wallace began to break down this wall of anger that I had put up. This love stuff had caught me off guard, but I remembered the feeling well. My momma showed it to me all the time, yet I still went out searching for it in all the wrong places.

  I stood a distance away and eyed my man sitting there on the couch. He was so fine, treated me so good. And here I was, a forty-five-year-old, running the streets, plotting and planning. I didn’t deserve him. I needed to be home appreciating my man.

  “Hey, Wallace, baby,” I said, sitting down next to him and kissing him on the cheek.

  He had a bottle of wine sitting on the table in front of him. It was obvious he had been drinking a little. He just turned and looked at me with a serious look on his face. “James, I’m not accustomed to having drama in my life or in my house.”

  “Huh?” I looked at him, confusion all over my face. I hadn’t the slightest idea what he was talking about.

  “And I definitely don’t like threats being made at me by people I don’t know.”

  “What are you talking about?” I said, now pissed off because he wasn’t being clear. “What are you talking about, people threatening you?”

  I began to wonder if Wallace was crazy, if that was the flaw he was hiding all this time. I mean, it wouldn’t be a surprise since I’m crazy as well. I always believed what my momma used to say to me as a teenager all the time, “You attract who you are, not what you want.”

  “Someone called here today and left a message for you on my answering machine.” He picked up the phone and proceeded to dial in the codes that played back the saved messages. He handed me the phone to let me listen.

  It was distorted, and the voice was muffled, so you couldn’t tell if it was a man or woman.

  “This message is for James or Jerry. Whoever the fuck you are. Your time is drawing nigh, bitch, so watch yo back and yo front because payback is right around the corner. Your ass is as good as dead, muthafucka. So live it up now, you shit-chaser, because your life is in my hands, and I’m about to end it.” Click

  I was speechless for once. Again I had no clue who it was. I sat back for a minute as the message played over in my head again. For the first time in my life, I was a little afraid. Just a little though.

  “I haven’t the slightest idea what that was all about,” I said, looking Wallace in the eyes. “That must be somebody playing a joke or something.” I slightly chuckled and placed my hand on his manhood.

  He took my hand off his dick and placed it on the chair beside him. “It didn’t sound like a joke, James.”

  I looked at him in shock. I was hoping to avoid all of this with my signature blowjob.

  “Whoever that was sounded pretty adamant about your demise. And, like I said before, I don’t like or need any drama in my life.” Wallace got up and picked the wine bottle up and proceeded to leave the room.

  “Baby, I will look into this tomorrow, and I promise that it won’t be happening again.”

  That was a lie that even I didn’t believe. I had no clue what to do about this situation, but to let it play out and hope that whoever was after me gave up or brought it on face to face and got this shit over with. I wasn’t going to let some crazy bastard mess up the only good relationship I had in my life. He or she wasn’t going to scare me this easy. A few threats and the car incident weren’t going to mess up the life I was destined to have.

  I sat in the living room for a few more minutes, questions flowing through my mind.

  Again, I shrugged it off and proceeded to go and please my man in the other room. I jumped in the shower and made sure I smelled oh so good when I got out.

  I walked into our bedroom, with emphasis on our, with the plan of seducing Wallace into forgetting about the threatening call. “I’m sorry, baby,” I said as I crept onto the California king-size bed. I crawled across like I was a cat on the prowl. I was naked and dazzling.

  He was watching Madea Goes to Jail. I could tell he was enjoying it. He had a smile on his face and chuckled as I made my way over to him. He was naked from the waist up, and I could see the glazed-over look he had from the wine he’d been drinking earlier.

  “I don’t wanna do anything to jeopardize our relationship, so maybe it’s best for me to move back into my apartment.”

  He retrieved the remote that was beside him and muted the movie and turned to me. “I trust you, James, and I definitely don’t want you to move out. You my baby.” He touched my face, brushing my cheek with the back of his hand gently. “Just handle yo business about whatever is going on and make sure that it doesn’t happen again.” He pulled me in close by my shoulders and began to kiss me passionately, letting his tongue slip into my mouth. Then he pulled out and let his tongue trace the outline of my lips.

  I let out a slight moan of pleasure. I reached over and tugged at his pajama pants, unleashing the monster within. It was pulsating and growing to full length fast. “Let me do what I do.” I took him in my mouth and let him enjoy my gift.

  He lay back as I did what I did best, and within minutes, he was coming all over my face. He cleaned himself up, and then he went back to watching his movie as I snuggled close to him with my head on his chest.

  I can’t believe the shit I did in the past was popping up now…right when I was thinking about throwing in the towel and settling down with my man. I drifted off to sleep, hoping this shit would end with me walking off into the sunset with Wallace.

  The next morning, I awoke to the smell of fried bacon. I loved me some bacon. I simmered in bed for a few more minutes before I grabbed my chocolate silk robe and slipped into my Winnie the Pooh slippers.
I sloshed my way into the bathroom to brush my teeth and wash my face before I made my way into the kitchen, where Wallace was.

  I walked in the medium-sized kitchen and sat at the table, and once again, I watched my man make me a meal fit for a king. He had eggs going, bacon frying, and I could smell cinnamon rolls in the oven baking.

  I shook my head. I didn’t deserve such a man. A tear slid out of my eye, and I quickly wiped it away.

  He had some calypso music playing and was swaying to the beat. So was I. He hadn’t noticed me yet, because he was really into the music and cooking. It was so cute. He softened my heart, and I didn’t even know it.

  I eased back out of my chair and made my way over to him, careful not to be too loud. I snuck up behind him and slipped my hand in his robe pockets, squeezing him and rubbing up against him.

  He wasn’t surprised at all. He just continued to sway to the music with me attached to him.

  I broke my embrace. “Ummmm!” I moaned. “Baby, it smells so good in here.”

  He turned around with a wooden spoon in his hand and guided it to my mouth.

  Fluffy, well-seasoned eggs danced in my mouth. “Wow! You sure you not an undercover chef or something?”

  He smiled and beamed with pride. “Well,” he said, turning back toward his pots and turning them off, “sit down, baby, and I will tell you all about it while we eat.”

  I did as I was told and took my seat across from him. He loaded our plates, and he then sat down at the table. We held hands as he blessed the food.

  “Okay, I’m ready.” I dug into my plate of food.

  He chuckled. “You always ready.”

  I laughed too. He was a comedian too. “No, seriously. I wanna know about my man.” I just had to know what he was hiding.

  He shoved a couple of forks full of eggs in his mouth before he began to speak. “Well, I am originally from Oakland, California, where I was raised by both parents. My dad was a doctor, and my mom pretty much stayed at home and raised me and my other two brothers. I was the oldest out of the three. My dad put in our minds a lot of pressure on being successful at an early age. He was superstrict and tolerated no foolishness, hence my no-drama policy.”