Living with Embers: (Son of Rain #4)

by Michelle Irwin

  I grabbed my cell phone and crept into the bathroom. Instead of shutting the door, and locking myself away, I left it open a crack. I figured if Evie saw a locked door without a shower running, she’d assume the worst. At least if I didn’t shut the door and she woke, she would know I wasn’t trying to hide anything—unless she leapt to the conclusion that I was too stupid to shut a damned door before plotting her demise.

  “Clay, what’s happening?” Dad’s voice was urgent as he answered the phone. I figured he had probably sent himself insane with worry after our last call.

  “I’ve had to wait until I was alone before I could call. Things are crazy around here, but I have some good news.”

  “What’s that?”

  “Ethan is going to be okay”

  “That is good. Where is he?”

  “He’s at the fae court. I’m not sure when they’ll let him out. But there’s more, the phoenix isn’t a threat anymore.”

  “What do you mean?”

  “She doesn’t have any fire anymore. She’s just a normal person. There’s no need to kill her now.” I doubted it was going to work, but I wanted to find out his reaction to my news. It would give me an idea about his mindset.

  “That doesn’t matter. She’s a danger, Clay. To you and your family.”

  “I don’t think—”

  “You don’t know what to think!” he snapped. “Until a few weeks ago, your brain was addled by her, and now you don’t have all of the information.”

  “I think I have enough to make my judgement.” I met my eye in the mirror as I spoke. The fact that he was willing to kill her even if there was no chance she’d hurt anyone else proved just how badly his morality had been twisted. It was the proof I’d been waiting for.

  “Don’t tell me she’s got her hooks into you again?”

  “No, she doesn’t. Trust me when I say that I’ll do what I have to in order to keep my family safe.” He’d showed his hand and revealed that he was intent on destroying Evie, and I could only assume our children too, and that helped me to pick my side.

  “So I take it that means you haven’t killed her?”

  “No, not yet.”

  “Why not? You need to do that and get out of there before you get infected by the court.”

  “I found a better solution.” I was already whispering, but I dropped my voice even lower still as I added, “One that will keep everyone safe.”

  “You’ve found both your brother and sister?”

  “Yeah. I found them.”

  “And you really think you can bring them home?”

  “I think I can. They trust me.” That much was true at least.

  “How can I help? What do you need?”

  “I just need a little more time.”

  “And what about the phoenix? Can you execute this plan without tipping her or her guards off before you destroy her?”

  Halfway through his sentence, I heard a noise behind me. I spun on the spot and met Evie’s worried eyes.

  “She doesn’t suspect anything,” I said into the cell as I pressed my finger to my lips to warn her to be quiet.

  Her eyes widened and the pulse point on her throat flickered as her heart raced. She backed away slowly, one arm stretched behind her as if she was searching for the door.

  I had to stop her from leaving. If she left, she might run straight to the guard and what I was trying to do for her and our babies would be for nothing. I rushed to the door and shut it before she could get there. To ensure she didn’t make any sounds that might alert Dad, I pressed my hand over her mouth, but I didn’t use any force. I couldn’t even if I’d wanted to.

  “Are you telling me you have the whole situation under control? Do I have to be worried about any . . . slips?”

  “It’s all going perfectly according to plan.” Even though I answered Dad, I focused on Evie, imploring her to hear me out before she went crazy at me.

  “When?”

  “I think it’ll be a few more weeks, but I can already tell they’ll both put their family first and see my side.”

  “Are you sure about that?”

  I hummed to say I was.

  “And you’re going to be careful around that seductress, aren’t you?”

  My gaze was locked with Evie’s as he said the word. Despite her obvious fear, I could feel the truth in his lie as the warmth of her breath brushed over my palm and her lilac irises drank in my gaze. “Yeah.”

  “If I go more than two weeks before I hear from you again, I’ll storm the court to look for you all.”

  “Sounds good.”

  “I’m putting my faith in you, boy. Don’t screw it up.”

  “I’ll call you when I get some time alone.” I dropped my hand and my gaze from Evie and waited for it to start. The lack of faith she had in me, and her lack of trust, was understandable given the circumstances, but it would make things harder in situations with Dad where I needed her to trust me implicitly and listen to my instructions without hesitation.

  Even though I’d removed my hand, she didn’t say anything.

  “Well then, let’s have it,” I said, inviting her ire. At least that way, I could get it over and done with before explaining the plan I’d hatched in the early hours of the morning.

  To my surprise, she was more than reasonable. In fact, her rambled explanation of how she’d learned to have faith in me—him—a long time ago surprised the heck out of me. I wasn’t willing to open the jaws of a gift horse to peer inside.

  Because she was willing to listen, I started with my explanation. “I was thinking about what . . . my sister—”

  “Louise,” she interrupted. She looked so happy to be helpful, I didn’t have the heart to tell her I remembered that. I’d been overwhelmed with new faces and names, but I was mostly holding them straight in my head.

  “About what Louise said about him.”

  “And?”

  “And between what he told me, her scars, and everything else, I think he has some explaining to do.”

  She waited for me to say something more. I was ready to tell her the idea I’d come up with, but I wasn’t entirely sure what she’d think of it.

  “Once Ethan has recovered, I thought he, Louise, and I could meet with Dad and work it out.” I was certain when the three of us were together against Dad, he’d see our view. He’d have to listen and would learn to accept the changes that had happened.

  Evie’s eyes widened and she paled. “Absolutely not.”

  “Why not?”

  “Because, whether you believe it or not, he was responsible for your memory loss. Even if it was a gamble for him before, he now knows for certain that the waters of the Lethe River can wipe your mind again. If he thought that you’d relapsed into being sympathetic toward me, he would probably find some way to force you to be exposed again. If you take Ethan and Louise, it could be two of the three of you wiped and ready for brainwashing, leaving Ethan outnumbered if he tried to fight—which he probably wouldn’t in case either of you two got hurt.”

  “I have to do something. If he’s a threat like everyone seems to think, he won’t just leave you in peace, will he?”

  Evie shook her head and gave me a pitiful look, as though she had expected more of me. Once again, I was failing to live up to the expectations of Saint Clay and had let her down. “He didn’t before. He’s got no reason to now. If anything, he’ll launch more attacks while I’m weakened. It’s me he blames for everything. It’s me he wants dead.”

  Twenty-four hours earlier, her words would have pissed me off because she was thinking the worst of him. Now, she didn’t say anything that I hadn’t already worked out from my conversation with Dad. “Then surely you agree we have to do something. If what you say is right, he’ll come after David and Ava once he knows about them, won’t he?”

  She didn’t even hesitate before answering. “Yes.”

  “I won’t let him hurt them,” I reassured her. There was no way I would let any harm c
ome to those two, even if it cost me everything I had left.

  She grinned at me and I had to drop my gaze away from her eyes to stop the heat rising to my cheeks—and the blood from flowing south in a way that wasn’t altogether terrible.

  “But what if you’re wrong?” It was possible Dad would take the opportunity to wipe my memory again like she was suggesting, but there was also the possibility—however slim—that Louise, Ethan, and I could get through to him.

  “What if I’m not?”

  I lifted my gaze back to meet hers. “What if you were at the meeting too?”

  Something flashed in her eyes—confusion or perhaps disbelief—before she agreed. “That could work. And maybe Aiden as well. Possibly Ben.”

  “Ben?” I had a vague memory of Dad and Abe talking about someone with that name, but it had only been a snippet of a conversation I’d heard while training.

  “He’s one of the Rain. He’s human. If something happens to the fae, if he uses enchantments or anti-fae charms, Ethan, Ben, and I will be able to help.”

  It made sense to have more on our side that were immune to the charms. If what Evie said was true, Louise and I would be vulnerable. And so would David if Dad attacked the house. “Okay.”

  She decided to put an end to the conversation then in favor of finding something to eat. Considering how long it had been since I’d had anything substantial, I was more than willing to agree.

  Before I let the conversation die completely though, I had one more thing to tell her about the night. “Thank you for sharing the bed last night. It was—” I cut off before I said too much about how perfect it had been having the warmth of her body at my side all night. I gave a small cough to cover up my pause. “—much more comfortable than the sofa.”

  A pink blush rose over her cheeks, and it made me long to cup her face with my hands to cause it to rise even further.

  “It was nothing,” she said before giving a hard swallow. Her tongue slipped forward and rolled over her lips. It sent a shudder through my body as I imagined the feel of it against my own. “I just hope it wasn’t too uncomfortable sharing it with a stranger.”

  “No—” My voice squeaked and caught as the desires coursing through me reached fever pitch. If we remained in the confines of the bathroom too much longer, I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from doing the things I wanted to the most. I cleared my throat to try again. “Not at all.”

  While we waited for breakfast, the babies woke again so Evie fed them in turn while I changed the other before we nursed them both back to sleep.

  It wasn’t long after Evie had finished that a knock came on the door. The spread of food was ridiculous. Everything from pancakes to bacon and eggs was laid out on the long silver tray that took two fae to carry.

  “Dig in,” Evie said as she grabbed herself a plate.

  “There’s so much.”

  She chuckled. “They’re used to the amount of enchantments I used to have to eat. I’m back to having a human metabolism now . . . I’ll have to remember that in the future.”

  She might as well have been speaking French for all I understood.

  It must have been printed on my face because she tittered again. “The food here is enchanted. It grants non-fae like me and Ethan the chance to live among the angels, if only temporarily. When the sunbird was awake—and when I was pregnant—my body burned through the enchantments so fast I had to eat and drink so much. They’re obviously catering for that still.”

  “Is that why . . .” I looked to Ava and recalled what Mackenzie said.

  Evie turned solemn. “Yeah. She’s been getting some of the enchantment from me, and I’ve been giving her some water each feed.” She indicated toward a jug on the side table. “It’s not enough though. The aura failing happens to fae children sometimes too. It’s something to do with the growing mind not being magical enough to cope with both worlds pressing against each other.”

  When I frowned in confusion again, she sighed.

  “Remind me to show you the court from the outside after this is all done.”

  I wasn’t sure what that would prove, but I agreed. Then the light surrounding me caught my eye and I wondered why I wasn’t “non-fae” like her and Ethan. And why Louise was fae.

  Once breakfast had been packed away, there was a knock on the door. Evie opened it greeted her guest. It was a fae I hadn’t met. One with wings and an aura colored the same sugar-pink as the blankets she held in her hands.

  A look passed over Evie’s face that indicated she didn’t know this person very well.

  “We haven’t had the pleasure of meeting yet,” the fae said to Evie.

  As soon as I wondered what her name was, something floated into my mind. Jacinta. I had no idea where it came from, or how I knew it. I spoke the name aloud, and the new fae gave me a warm smile that indicated I’d got her name right.

  “Clay,” she said as she nodded in greeting with a familiarity in her eye that suggested we knew each other. “I will not keep you; I am aware that you are anxious to return to your home. I wanted to bring you these gifts. They are enchanted to bring your children happy dreams each night.”

  Evie took the mink blankets from her with a thank you. We’d barely closed the door behind Jacinta when there was another knock. Another fae. Another gift. As she bid farewell to the second fae, Evie stuck her head out into the corridor and then glanced back at me.

  “There’s a line,” she mouthed.

  I tilted my head in confusion.

  She walked closer to me. “There is a line of fae outside, all of them with gifts. We could be here for hours.”

  “I guess they all want to wish you luck and goodwill.”

  “Us,” she said. “They want to wish it to both of us. The whole court loved you as much as I did.”

  And they were only lining up because I was “back.”

  Despite the thought dragging my mood down, I stood with Evie and played host. Most of the fae only wanted to leave their presents. A few stopped to place personal goodwill blessings on the twins. Overall, it was an astonishing thing to watch because one thing was clear. They all loved and revered Saint Clay and his little family.

  I was just the temporary stand-in, and it would hurt me to forget that.

  CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

  NEARLY THREE HOURS later, we’d reached the end of the queue and more food arrived.

  The babies woke again not long before the last guest. I kept them entertained enough for Evie to bid her farewell before picking up David to feed him. It was good that for the most part the twins seemed synced onto the same schedule. I was certain that wouldn’t last for too long.

  As we started to pack up the gifts the babies had received and the things that had been brought from Evie’s house, I decided to take the opportunity to have a lesson in the things I had forgotten.

  “Can you run me through the politics here and some of the things I should know?” I hated admitting my weakness, but if we were going to pull off the deception, I would need her help. I didn’t want another surprise like Kieran. If I’d known he was the púca, I might have been able to form some questions in a way that would get us the information we wanted without giving up the fact we didn’t know what we were doing.

  Besides, I liked seeing the way helping me lit up Evie’s face, the way she smiled when she thought she was being helpful.

  It wasn’t just gaps we were trying to fill; we needed to lay a whole new founding layer.

  “I’ll try. There’s so much you never told me though.”

  “If we meant so much to each other, why were there things I didn’t tell you?”

  Her smile turned nostalgic, and her gaze grew dreamy. “I think you worried that you might scare me away if you admitted too much about what happened when you went on hunts.”

  “But I tried to kill you—”

  She winced at the reminder.

  “—and yet you’re still here.” It seemed crazy when I said it so plainly, but
it was the truth. Every action or admission that should have sent her running, hadn’t.

  “I love—loved you.” Her voice landed heavily on the D, a reminder that I’d—he’d—hurt her by losing my memory and becoming a stranger. “That doesn’t disappear because of one mistake. If you tried it again now that you know the truth, we’d have issues.”

  “So you would’ve forgiven anything he—I did during these hunting trips?”

  She looked to the floor, as if it would provide her the answers. “You changed in the time I knew you. The things you did . . . they never defined you in my eyes. Maybe that makes me stupid—”

  “I think it makes you forgiving.”

  “Only when it’s deserved. You, and your brother and sister, have earned it from me in spades despite the rocky start we all had.”

  The old me was a lucky bastard—at least until he’d thrown it away. I was about to voice that opinion when the same look of hurt—disappointment—echoed in her eyes and I was rendered mute. She didn’t want me offering her any compliments. She wanted the “real Clay” back saying those things.

  “So run me through what you do know,” I said to change the subject. “How about the court?”

  She bit her lip as she considered my suggestion. “That’s probably a good place to start. I guess the first thing you should know is that your mother is the queen.”

  My jaw fell open. How had no one mentioned that? “What?”

  “Your mother. She’s the queen here. At least for now. Eventually, either Louise or Mackenzie will take over.”

  I couldn’t even consider the second part of her statement. My head was still reeling from the one before.

  My mother was a fae queen?

  “Are you sure?” The question blurted from me, perhaps a little rudely, but I hoped Evie would understand. Because I’d been so concerned with trying to sort through fact and fiction, I hadn’t given much thought to what Evie or anyone else had meant when they’d said I was fae. It made sense in some way that my mother must have been fae, but a queen?

  Another thought struck—with all that Dad had said about the fae, why would he be with one? It just didn’t make sense. Maybe it was something else, some curse or throwback to previous generations.