Silent Dances

by A. C. Crispin

  since Tesa ' s Mizari voder was covered with mud.

  Bru ce g ri nned at Tesa while unlocking the floor bolts so the couch

  could float. "Forget Sacajawea, hello Chief Joseph!" Tesa nodded , lip-reading the name of the Nez Perce chief

  who'd known when to fight and when to retreat. " I hope," she signed as

  Meg translated, "that I , too, `will fight no more, forever'!"

  Bru ce made a clumsy sign to her, a G ru s compliment that meant " you are one with the World."

  Thorn' s surp ri sed expression was almost comic . He clearly had not

  expected this reaction from the meteorologist.

  Peter came around the other side, his dark face drawn with concern . He

  and B ru ce floated the couch onto the station and down the long cor ri

  dor to the infirma ry .

  "I saw you counting coup on that big female," B ru ce said to Tesa . " That was quick thinking , girl."

  "I can't believe this," Thorn complained. "I thought you'd be furious."

  " Who, me ?" said B ru ce.

  "Yeah, you. You we re the one who was dead set against having ' a human woman living with a bunch of p ri mitive..."

  Bru ce shot Thorn a look that silenced him on the spot. "I can recognize

  when the ri ght person ' s been selected for the job."

  Peter coughed theatrically at the sparring males as they pulled up beside the

  infirmary' s diagnostic bed. Dr . Li scooted around them , reaching for equipment.

  Lauren was already there, setting up the scanner . When she saw Tesa ,

  she paled . " Honey , you look terrible ! Are you okay?"

  Tesa was signing, " It's only a flesh wound , only a flesh wound ," over and over . Meg wondered if she was deli ri ous.

  147

  SILENT DANCES 147 "Lau re n , set up for full body imaging ," Dr. Li said. "I w an t a good look at those kidneys."

  Bruce and Peter moved out of Szu-yi's way as she gently re moved the ice

  wrap from Tesa's face . The swelling around the Indian woman ' s eyes

  and nose looked even more shocking with Tesa ' s light eyes squinting

  through.

  Szu-yi's face softened. "You really did take a beating, Tesa. You must feel

  terri ble."

  Tesa shook her head, not understanding what Dr. Li had said.

  Szu-yi simply said, " Never mind . We'll fix it ." She patted Tesa ' s knee consolingly.

  The doctor' s sudden ch an ge reminded Meg of Szu - yi's gentle touch

  while she'd examined her ears, and the doctor's g ri ef when she'd re

  alized she couldn ' t save Meg's hea ri ng.

  The doctor scissore d Tesa ' s pant leg away , uncove ri ng the bloodied, dirty stab wound on Tesa's calf.

  " What a beauty ," Bruce said quietly.

  Thorn' s frayed ne rv es unraveled . " Dammit , Bruce , there's nothing beautiful about it! She nearly got killed down there." Peter shot Thorn a warn ing look, but Bruce only seemed amused . " My, a re n ' t we protective all of a sudden?"

  Lauren' s face clouded over as she sta re d at Thorn. "You' re both ri ght," Dr. Li said quietly. "Tesa could've gotten killed," she told Bruce , "

  but," she turn ed to Thorn, " she doesn ' t need coddling . She needs rest and medical ca re . That ' s me, Lau re n , an d Meg. The re st of you get out. Now."

  "What is this?" Bruce complained . " Suddenly only women a re capable of nursing care ? Sexism re ars its ugly head?"

  "Uncle Bruce , we have to get her und re ssed," Lauren

  warn ed . She seemed in control of her feelings , but, Meg noted, she

  avoided eye contact with Thorn . " I think Tesa would be more

  comfortable with just ` us girls."'

  "Let me get these two hotheads out of here," Peter offere d agreeably,

  moving in between Bruce an d Thorn , " so I can re mind them about the benefits of peaceful working relationships."

  "Let's get her out of those clothes," the doctor said, once the door closed behind the men. She held up a cutting tool. Tesa gestu re d for them to

  stop , indicating her shapeless top.

  For the first time since the batt le , she looked upset. "Don't cut this," she signed feebly , fumbling with lacings crusted

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  with dried marsh sludge an d blood . Meg realized suddenly that what she

  was wearing was made of feathers , ma tt ed now, and broken . Where had she gotten it?

  " Weaver made it," Tesa explained.

  "What' s she saying ?" Dr. Li asked . Lauren showed her the tr an slation on her voder.

  Tesa' s eyes b ri mmed with tears. "It helps Sailor focus on me. . . it honors Water Dancer ' s spi ri t ..." Overwhelmed, she began sobbing.

  Lauren gently patt ed the younger woman ' s arm and stroked her ma tt

  ed hair. Meg was alarmed by Tesa ' s breakdown, but Dr. Li was unpe rt

  urbed . " She's okay . Her body ' s just realized all the excitement ' s over, " she said ma tt er - of-factly.

  Moments later, Tesa pulled herself together . " I'm sor ry , I don't know why..."

  Dr. Li nodded reassurance. " Don't apologize , Tesa, it's just chemistry.

  Let's get you out of this shi rt ."

  " Weaver made that?" Meg asked, finge ri ng the garment. The young woman nodded while awkwardly wiggling out of it.

  "It must' ve been beautiful once ," Lauren re marked, "but it's a wreck now."

  "They' ve never done anything like this befo re," Meg said. " Taller helped design it," Tesa added, still sniffling. "Peter's mother was a

  textile curator at that big Senegalese

  museum," Meg re membered . " I bet he can do something with this .

  Take it to him, Lau re n . This represents something impo rt ant . We need to document it. And , Lauren ... make sure Bruce sees it."

  The technici an looked amused. "Sure thing, Meg."

  Later, as Meg and Szu-yi studied the readout of Tesa's body scan , Meg

  told Szu-yi what they had had to promise Taller. "How could you?" The doctor was incredulous. "Tesa needs two days in the regen and time to re

  st!"

  Meg shook her head. " She goes tonight. We wanted her to become one

  of them , well, she has. I c an 't go back on my word."

  The doctor' s thin lips d re w tight . " This is totally ir re gular. The re a re protocols about medical ca re . You're asking me to okay her re lease

  when I don ' t think she ' s ready."

  " Release her on my say-so and register your own protest. You'll be

  clear , an d an y consequences'll be on me."

  149

  SILENT DANCES 149 Szu-yi shot Meg an an g ry look. "You think that '

  s all I'm

  worri ed about , accountabili ty? I'm wor ri ed about her , her infection , her pain . You think I dem an d things be done by the book so I c an cover my ass ? I do things by the book because that ' s the smart way to do it. Protocols a re w ritt en by people who've found the best way, the safest way, not necessarily the easiest way." The doctor shut her mouth with a sudden snap. It was the most Meg had ever heard her say on the

  subject.

  Scott and I never did anything by the book , Meg re alized. Szu-yi thinks that if we had, Scott might still be alive.

  Scott' s ghost whispe re d irreve re ntly , You call that living?

  Hours later , Tesa emerged from the re gen unit stiff an d so re . Her face still had some swelling, an d the re were dark c re scents under her eyes.

  The doctor had impl an ted her punctu re wounds with a powerful an tibiotic, an tiviral regen drug that would stimulate rapid healing . The re gen unit had re pai re d the worst of her org an an d bone damage, but had not had the time to do much with the body bruising.

  Tesa didn' t ca re . The Ea rt h - normal gravi ty w as dep re ssing, the air smelled c an ned , an d she w as feeling claustrophobic.

 
; Except for a moment, Dr. Li re minded her too much of the doctors that

  had t re ated her as a child -- doctors who would never speak to her,

  only to her pa re nts . She missed her avi an family.

  "It's good you still have pain," Dr. Li said to Tesa. "Your aches will slow you down, p re vent you fr om reinju ri ng yourself."

  Tesa knew Dr. Li was an g ry about her having to leave, so she showed

  the doctor something she'd filmed on her voder. "That ' s Sailor ," Tesa explained , showing the doctor footage of "her " baby . " That ' s why I have to go back."

  Dr. Li only nodded, still frowning. The young wom an felt disappointed

  that she didn ' t warm to her blue - eyed, downy baby.

  "I've seen them before ," the doctor said, her exp re ssion tight . "At my home in China, in Zhalong . But there, the Zhalong cr an es are only

  shoulder high."

  "Szu-yi grew up in a farming community near a famous crane nesting

  ground," Meg explained. "In the late nineteen hundreds, when cr an es were end an gered , a captive b re eding facility was established there to save them."

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  150 A.C. Crispin and Kathleen O' Malley "Hand-raised cranes hatched at the facility were released into the surrounding wetlands," Szu-yi said. "And

  the tame cranes began to fight the farmers for control of the marsh. The

  farmers harvested reeds, grass, and fish and disturbed the nesting birds.

  Wild birds would have abandoned their nests, but not the Zhalong cranes.

  They fought the farmers-and trained their chicks to do the same. Now, there

  are thousands of pairs at Zhalong. They nest in your yard and attack you if

  you want to hang your wash. As a child I was terrified."

  Her expression grew distant. "My father wanted me to overcome my fear, so

  he stole an egg from a nearby nest. We hatched it, raising the chick like a pet. I loved that little thing. Then he grew up and joined the flock. A few years

  later, he brought a mate to our yard. When I went out to see him, how mature

  he'd become, how beautiful-he attacked me viciously, nearly blinding me. It

  was his yard now , not mine . I was his enemy. So you see, there's great irony in my working here." She tried to smile , but a dark fear haunted her eyes. "Don't expect that baby to love you as long as you'll love him. When he

  matures there'll be no place for you in his heart, only for his new family."

  Tesa wanted to remind the doctor that the Grus were not the cranes of Earth,

  but the doctor had planted a seed of fear. When Sailor matured could he still

  love her the way she'd love him? Why worry? said her inner demon. You

  won't be here that long. You'll be back on Earth, getting fi xed!

  Tesa limped through Peter's door into a room rich with vivid colors splashed

  across Senegalese blankets and rugs. The computer specialist sat cross-

  legged on his bed, surrounded by Grus mesh bags packed with short, downy

  feathers and skeins of colorful grass. Across his knees was the cloak Flies-

  Too-Fast had given Lauren. He was comparing its weave with Tesa's shirt.

  A great window dominated the room, and through it a semicircle of Trinity

  reflected the suns still on her face. Tesa looked at it longingly and had to

  force herself to bring her attention back to the people in the room.

  Bruce was also on the bed, leaning against the wall, legs stretched out and

  crossed at the ankles. Between the two men sat Lauren, winding up

  remnants of grass. Tesa was disappointed that Thorn was not there.

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  Her feathered costume was balled up in Peter's lap while he finished

  tying a knot , his handsome hands moving expe rt ly. He tu rn ed the re pai re d garment ri ght - side out , shook it, and said something . Tesa glanced at her voder.

  "Nothing comes loose," he'd said. "How does it look?" Tesa held back grateful tears as she looked at her shi rt , clean and beautiful again ,

  then she grabbed Peter in a warm hug.

  "I used to help my mother restore Pima feathered baskets," Peter said , his words marching across Tesa ' s voder . " There's some similarity in technique . That battle was quite a lot to put a valuable a rt ifact

  through !" He looked at Tesa with a w ry expression . " Not to mention a p rett y good inter re lator."

  "Tesa," Bruce asked , " when did you have time to make this?"

  Tesa looked up from the voder, sta rt led . " I didn't make ..."

  Meg gave Bruce a disappro ving frown.

  " You' re a native dancer ," the lanky weatherman insisted. "You' re used to making costumes."

  "Weaver made this!" Tesa signed sharply, t ru sting Meg to translate . " I never even saw it until it was almost finished. You're just selling the G

  ru s sho rt again , B ru ce!"

  Bru ce tu rn ed the edge of her garment over. "Come on, Tesa, this thing

  ' s pieced together like a quilt top," he said , plainly disbelieving . " You had to show them how to do that."

  "Weaver figure d out the technique herself ," Tesa insisted, "after seeing my old star quilt . She created new techniques to join the skin to the

  weavings . To make clothing for an alien species--especially when the

  maker has never worn any herself-is pretty sophisticated . Su re ly , even you can see that!"

  Bru ce shook his head. "Forgive my skepticism , but old beliefs die

  hard , l il darlin '. I can still remember the first day I saw this pre tt y marble ." B ru ce indicated T ri nity hove ri ng over them . " That day I thought - I'll b ri ng my family here, build a city , make the kind of money I'd always known I'd make by going into space . Then Scott and Meg

  found the G ru s, and that dream ended . But that was okay, because

  we'd get something better out of it. We ' d help get Earth full CLS

  membership."

  He scratched his thinning gray hair. " If, as you say, Weaver made this for

  you- - and, of course , I'm not doubting your word ... well, that could be the proof Earth needs . I should be

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  thrilled ... but there must still be a part of me that kept on hoping that I was

  right in the first place ... that someday there'd be cities on Trinity that I'd

  helped build."

  The Indian woman looked at the others, confused, wondering how many of

  them shared Bruce's feelings.

  "Tesa," Meg tried to explain, "when we found Trinity, none of us had any First Contact experience. We were colonizers."

  "I'd never stepped off a space station! " Lauren told her. "I collected and organized data, and kept the robot probes running. It was two years before I

  set foot on the planet."

  "And you?" Tesa asked Peter.

  "Thorn and I had no extraterrestrial experience," Peter admitted. "We had to have special training before we came. Szuyi had worked with the Simiu, but

  they were so sensitive and unpredictable, she asked for an assignment with

  minimal contact"--Peter laughed dryly--"and ended up with her favorite

  phobia."

  "Remember, Bruce," Lauren said, "when Scott first told us that he thought they'd found an intelligent species?"

  He nodded. "I told Scott he was crazy. I said they looked more like a food

  source then Earth's best shot at CLS membership."

  Tesa tried to mask her shock when she read those words. "Scott was

  furious," Meg reminisced. "You two fought over making contact with the

  Grus."

  "I respected his opinion," Bruce insisted, "but when I watched the Grus

  playing catch with a stick, or spending hours fixing their feathers ... their

  intelligence was hard to accept." He gently touched the feathers on Tesa's
/>
  shirt. "But when Scott said he wanted to call the CLS, whose side was I on?"

  Meg smiled and nodded, obviously remembering.

  "I backed you and Scott all the way," Bruce said, "and when the Falcon and Deborah tried to stop you"

  Tesa frowned at the strange reference on her voder, but Meg quickly

  explained. "That was Bruce's nickname for Jim Maltese, because of a holo-

  vid show they'd seen-The Maltese Falcon."

  "I was the only one on your side," Bruce continued. "I even convinced Lauren. But that's the past." He indicated the Grus shirt with a grim smile.

  "This ... will change things. This will shut up all that Simiu chatter. Once the

  Grus' intel ligence

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  is confirmed , Jamestown Founders will lose its claim to T ri nity , forever."

  Tesa shook her head, frowning . Having accepted the shi rt , Bruce was now really making too much of this simple thing. Her garment wasn ' t a

  patch on the sto ry -walls, on the complex legends of the White Wind

  people . There was a secret in those beautiful walls, and in the cloaks , a secret Tesa hadn't been able to ferret out. Maybe someone on the

  Crane could.

  Tesa lifted her hand to get their attention, an d when they tu rn ed to

  watch , she began to sign about the world inside the nest shelter . She told them about the sto ri es she could almost see, about the fractu ri ng of light th ro ugh a shimme ri ng ' s wings, about how Weaver searched through piles of feathers or strands of grass to find just the ri ght one

  for her project, when, to Tesa , they all seemed identical . She realized that she was moving her hands in the same a rt ful way her

  grandmother did when she was telling a good sto ry, and that the

  others were watching her with the rapt look a good sto ry teller always

  gets. It pleased her that they stopped looking at Meg, who was

  translating aloud , and watched her, an d the picture images she was

  creating.

  Finally, Tesa patched her voder into one of Peter ' s computer links an d called up the sto ry -walls. The group looked and glanced at one

  another , cu ri ously. They couldn't see it, either.

  "The stori es are there ," Tesa insisted . " Taller an d Weaver tell them, an d the chick follows it on the wall -- but to me it's invisible . They keep a calendar on a cloak . They show me things, and they feel sorry for me that I can't see it." She keyed in the Lakota words sintkala waksu . " This is what we call the stones we use to heat the sweat lodge. It means `bird