We continue chatting until we need to get out and cool down.
“Hey, Molly is out tonight babysitting if you want to come back for a beer. We can stop off on the way for some dinner.”
“Ryan, seriously, do you want to spend all your night with me? Even I know how miserable I am!”
“Jax, shut up!”
Jax eventually headed for home just after nine. I told him if he wanted to drink more, he could sleep in what was quickly becoming his room as he has stayed so often after getting drunk recently, but he declined, not wanted to intrude on us once Molly was home. She is babysitting Oscar because it is Megan and James’ anniversary. They promised her they wouldn’t be late, so I’m hoping to get a text from her soon, saying she is on her way. I am already feeling anxious about her driving home as the snow that was falling lightly earlier has now started settling. That car of hers gives me nightmares as it is; I do not need snow on top of that. I should be glad that I eventually got her out at the weekend to order a new car. All day she dragged me round the different garages while she argued about what she should have. As far as I was concerned, anything small was out of the question. Problem was, Molly was really adamant she wasn’t confident driving anything big. She eventually caved though, when she test-drove the Mercedes A Class, because she said it didn’t feel big and I was happy that it wasn’t tiny. The only problem is that she got such a good deal on the new number plate that it won’t get delivered until March. That is potentially three months of bad weather I am going to have to worry about.
Just after ten, I get the text I have been waiting for, telling me she is on her way and that she is going to drive safely - my girl knows me too well! On a good day, it would take her twenty minutes, but in the snow it’s probably going to be more like forty, so I decide to head upstairs so I can be waiting for her in bed. I’m already getting tingles at the thought of her eyes darkening and her cheeks flushing when she finds me ready and waiting for her. God, I cannot get enough of that woman!
I must have fallen asleep, because my phone ringing wakes me. I quickly sit up and see that it’s already eleven o’clock. I look to the other side of the bed to see that it is empty. My heart instantly starts racing in my chest as the panic sets in. I grab my phone and answer it without looking who it is.
“MOLLY?” I shout into the phone.
“Ryan, it’s Susan. We are two minutes away - get dressed now,” she says in a menacingly low voice.
I pull the phone away from my ear and just stare down at it. Please God, no, don’t let what I’m thinking be true.
“NOW, RYAN!” I hear screamed into the phone.
Chapter Twenty-One
Ryan
Somehow, I managed to pull some clothes on and was standing at the front door when a taxi pulled up and Susan jumped out the back. One look at her and I knew, I just knew.
I felt my world implode around me.
This cannot be happening again.
Susan pulls me from my dark thoughts as she grabs my hand and starts pulling me towards the idling taxi. She has tears pouring down her face but I feel like I’m in a complete trance. It’s like aliens have taken over and are controlling my body.
This cannot be real. I must be dreaming.
“Ryan,” I hear someone say in the distance, but I let it wash over me.
“Ryan…Ryan.”
A hand on my thigh brings me back around and I look over to Susan’s concerned face as she studies me. I continue looking at her, willing her to tell me this is a joke. Unfortunately, those are not the words that come from her.
“Ryan, I don’t really know anything about what is going on, other that what I heard.” I feel my eyebrows draw together in question. “I rang Molly because I was worried about her getting home safe. When she answered, she was driving - on hands free,” she quickly adds. “We spoke very briefly because I wanted her concentrating on the road. I had just said that I wanted her to let me know when she was back that it happened.” More tears stream down her face and she goes silent.
“What happened?” I whisper the first words I have spoken since I first answered the phone what feels like hours ago, but was actually merely minutes.
“She was at the traffic lights by the services, she said. Just as I was about to hang up, I heard her scream and an almighty bang, along with other noises I can’t even begin to describe.” It’s not until she reaches up that I realise a tear has dropped down on to my cheek.
“I ran for the home phone and called an ambulance to get there and explained what I just heard. I woke Pete up, got dressed and came to you. It…it could be nothing, Ryan, she could be totally fine, but…”
I rest my head back and look up to the stars though the sunroof of the taxi and send up my silent prayers that my girl is going to be okay. Please, let her be okay.
Not many minutes later, the three of us are running to the reception desk of A&E in our local hospital.
“Molly Carter,” I say, in a much calmer voice than I was expecting. “She came in by ambulance, from a car accident.” My voice cracks at the end that time.
“Her ambulance came in a few minutes ago. Sir, I am going to have to ask you to wait until we know what that situation is. I will tell the doctors she has relatives here already so one will come and see you as soon as they can. You are relatives, right?” the receptionist asks.
“Uh…”
“Yes, he’s her husband,” Susan quickly pipes up from where she is standing slightly behind me.
“Okay, well Mr. Carter, if you would like to take a seat, someone will be with you shortly.”
“It’s Evans, Ryan Evans.”
“Oh but…”
“She hasn’t changed her name yet; it was only a few weeks ago,” Susan adds, trying to cover for me.
We go and find seats for what turns out to be the most horrific wait of my life. No one comes out to say anything. We have no idea if she’s alive, although judging by the fact no one has told us otherwise I would like to think she is. I just need to know what the hell is happening.
Eventually, the receptionist pointing over at me catches me eye, and I see what I presume is a doctor walking our way.
“Mr. Evans I’m Dr. John. I’ve been taking care of your wife. If you’d like to follow me, I’ll explain what is happening.”
“Please can I just see her?”
“The nurses are just getting her tidied up. They won’t be long and then yes, you may see her.”
We sit in the relatives’ room with the doctor for ten minutes while he explains that Molly suffered a major blow to the head when she crashed. They are monitoring the swelling but it could be crucial if it increases, so they may have to operate. The next twenty-four to forty-eight hours are crucial, and he keeps explaining that it is very serious. Every time he says it, I have to clench my fist at my side. I know how fucking serious this is, he does not need to keep telling me. He tells us she has a broken collarbone and arm that will be cast shortly, and that she is very bruised and battered but most of that is superficial. The only major concern is the swelling on her brain.
“Can I see her now, please?”
“Yes, they should be done by now. I’m sorry,” he says, looking over at Susan and Pete, “Only one visitor at a time.”
“Ryan, you go. We’ll be here if you need us, but Molly needs you the most. Go,” she says when she sees I’m about to argue, although I’m not sure why.
“Follow me, Mr. Evans.” I follow the doctor through the maze of hallways until he comes to a stop outside a door. “Mr. Evans, your wife is in intensive care currently while we monitor her condition. You will need to buzz in here to be allowed entry in the future.” I just nod my head at him and he unlocks the door and continues. “We have her sedated at the moment while we monitor her, so she will be asleep.”
The moment he opens the next door is when I see her. I practically push the doctor aside in my haste to be with her. She looks so broken, laid out on the hospital bed with w
ires and tubes coming from her. Tears instantly start pouring down my face and the lump in my throat feels like the size of a football. I take her tiny hand in mine and pray once again for her to pull through his.
Moments later, I’m distracted by a nurse placing a chair down behind me. I turn to look at her. She looks like the kindest woman on the planet, for which I am instantly grateful.
She gently places her hand on my forearm and encourages me to sit down. “This must have been a terrible shock for you. You need to rest,” she says as I lower myself down.
“You’ve got a fighter on your hands there,” she says, smiling over to Molly. “My name’s Hannah and I’ll be your wife’s nurse for the night. If there is anything I can get either of you, please ask.” I just about manage to hold my sob in until she walks back over to the nurses’ station. Hannah, of course it is! I can’t help but smile slightly through my sobs.
The doctor comes back some time later. I have completely lost all concept of time so it could have been minutes or hours, I have no idea. He checks the machines Molly is attached to before looking at her notes at the end of the bed. Once he is happy, he pulls a chair over and sits in front of me.
“I don’t want you to get your hopes up too high, but things seem to be looking like they are going in the right direction. As I said earlier, these first few hours are crucial, but so far the signs are good.” I let out a huge breath at his words. “Now, I need to ask you something,” he looks over at Molly, then back at me. The look on his face has me dreading what is going to come next. “Did you know your wife is pregnant?”
I just stare at him with an open mouth and wide eyes. Molly is pregnant. How…what…when?
“Mr. Evans,” he says, trying to bring me back to earth.
“She hasn’t been feeling well for a few weeks but no, I didn’t know that. I’m pretty sure she didn’t know either.” I think back to her drinking over the last few weeks. There is no way she could have known; I know Molly well enough to know she wouldn’t do that if she knew.
“Well, our tests show she is about nine weeks pregnant. Now, I obviously don’t need to tell you that there is a huge risk of her miscarrying with what her body has been through, and still is going through, but I wanted to make you aware. We will scan her later to check everything, but the heartbeat is strong.”
I slump back in the chair as I try to process everything.
“I’ll leave you to your thoughts,” the doctor says, getting up and leaving me with Molly. I watch him walk over to the nurse and say something, making her smile kindly at me and nod her head.
I turn back to Molly. I hold her hand softly in one of mine and place my other gently on her stomach. I can’t help but think that finding out she’s pregnant should be one of the happiest moments of my life, but here I am, scared out of my mind.
Four days she ended up spending in intensive care, the longest four days of my life. Just like Hannah the nurse said, she is a fighter. The doctors have said she is making good progress and the swelling has reduced massively. She is almost out of danger, that said, though they have kept her sedated longer than originally planned to try to give her body as long as possible to heal.
I am now more desperate than ever for her to wake up, to see her eyes, to see her smile, to tell her I love her and to know she can hear me. I had a few arguments about it but I have barely left her side in the four days she has been here. The furthest I have been is the toilets and the canteen when no one else was around to get something for me. The doctors and nurses have tried to send me home to get some rest along with all the Morrisons, my family and all our friends. They have all been here at some point over the last four days, even though they were only allowed in for a few minutes. I know they have all been sat in the relatives’ room for hours though, supporting both of us.
I watch as the nurses finish off getting Molly settled in her new room. They managed to get her a side room, which will be nice and quiet, although I’m not sure if it is for Molly or just for them so they don’t have to fight with me to leave because of the other patients she would be with on a ward with. I am grateful whatever the reason, though.
“Darling, please come home and have a shower and a good night’s sleep,” my mum says gently from the chair next to me.” Now Molly is in a room of her own and is getting stronger, they have let up on visitors.
“No, I’m not leaving her. There is a perfectly good shower there,” I nod my head to the adjoining bathroom, “if I want one.”
“Baby, I don’t think it’s a case of you wanting one,” she says, squeezing my hand gently.
Yes, I know how I look and how I must smell, but I am not leaving Molly, especially now they are reducing her sedation. She could wake up at any minute and I want to be there when she opens her eyes.
“Okay, well when your dad gets back with some food for you, we are going to head back to yours. We’ll be back tomorrow, but ring if you need anything.”
“I will, Mum, thank you.”
Susan and Pete rang my parents from the hospital the night Molly was brought in, and they drove straight down to be with us. They were here at 7am and have been here ever since. Her brothers appeared a couple of hours after we did, looking panic stricken. I just about managed to let them both have some time with her. Abbi and Liv were here all weekend but both had to go back. They have promised they will be here if I need them, though. Molly might have the shittiest parents ever, but everyone else around her who loves her definitely makes up for them. There has hardly been moment when there hasn’t been anyone here.
Not long after Mum and Dad leave does Susan walk in. I am so grateful for everyone’s presence the last few days. I’m sure I would have gone stir crazy without them.
“Ryan, I am not taking no for an answer. Take this and get in that bloody shower. When Molly wakes up, she does not want to be looking at you looking such a mess. I promise I will knock if she so much as twitches, but please, for all our sakes, have a wash,” she demands while handing me a bag full of toiletries.
“But…”
“No buts, get in there now.”
I do as I’m told, because as much as I don’t want to leave her bedside, I am well aware of what a state I’m in and Susan is right. Molly doesn’t need to see it when she wakes up.
The next morning, I wake up with the same stiff neck that I have done every time I wake up in this damn chair. I grab my phone to check the time, but what I see first makes me stop dead in my tracks. It’s the 15th January. Shit. I look back up at Molly and wonder if this day is going to be cursed forever more.
I spend the morning between nurses’ and doctors’ visits, talking to Molly about Hannah and about the things we did together. I try to keep it as light as possible, because I don’t think I can cope with any more misery, and I know that if Molly can hear me that she will feel the same.
It’s just after lunchtime when the Morrisons appear, looking a little worse for wear. I stand and give them all a hug before offering Susan my chair. I watch from the corner as they all say hello to Molly in the hope she can hear them. I listen to them explain what they are doing tonight to celebrate Hannah’s memory, and they try to convince me to come but I think they already know my answer. Yes, I want to celebrate Hannah, but as harsh as it sounds, that is now in my past and I really need to focus on my future and my future is still lying fast asleep on that bed. I haven’t told anyone about the baby yet, firstly because I want Molly to know before anyone else, but also because I’m scared that if I admit it, then it’s not going to happen. It has been drummed into me by the nurses and doctors how at risk the baby is with Molly’s condition, so I’m trying my best not to be too hopeful.
The Morrisons leave not long after that, and the afternoon is just a train of visitors. Jax sits with us for over an hour before Steven and Daniel show up after work, shortly followed by Shane and Chris, then finally Megan, after she has put Oscar to bed. By the time she has left, I am completely exhausted. It won’t be happen
ing anytime soon, but I really do need to sleep in a bed.
It’s just gone half past eight when I feel it. I had slightly dozed off, but I am sure I didn’t imagine it. I sit myself up straighter and wait to see if it happens again.
Five minutes later, it does: Molly gently squeezes my hand.
I scoot my chair closer to her and patiently wait to see if anything else is going to happen. I lift her hand up to my lips and pepper her knuckles with light kisses. “Come on, Molly. Come back to me, gorgeous,” I whisper between kisses.
As I wait, the little squeezes of my hand get tighter until I eventually start to see her eyes flickering.
I sit deadly still and I wait and pray that any moment I’m going to see her looking back at me.
Molly
The voices I can hear slowly start to make sense to me at the same time the pounding in my head increases. Where am I?
“Are you sure you won’t come? A good meal would really do you some good,” says a voice I recognise but can’t quite place.
“You’re probably right, but I’m not leaving.”
Ryan. Wherever I am, he’s here, so it must be okay, is the last thing I remember thinking before the blackness faded back in.
“Has Abbi been back?” a male voice says.
“No, she rings every day but I haven’t seen her since she ran away from you on Sunday.”
Ryan’s still here.
“Hey bro, how’s our girl doing?”
That’s Daniel’s voice. I’d recognise it anywhere.
“No change. They say that’s to be expected, though,” Ryan says. The sound of his voice makes my heart beat a little faster.
Who are they talking about?
“This waiting sucks,” Daniel says before everything fades again.
It’s quiet. It’s the first time I’ve not heard anyone talking. Am I alone?
It takes all my strength but I manage to move my hand slightly and realise I’m not alone. He’s holding my hand.
Angel Series Books #1-2.5 Page 55