I dump my glass in the sink and head towards my bedroom so I can shower before dinner. I just turn to go up the stairs when a note on the side table in the hallway catches my eye.
Connie, we’ve popped to the shop, be back soon.
Mum xx
Smiling about the fact I’ve got the house all to myself for a little while, I head up to my room. I kick the door open and drop my towel on the bed before walking over to my speakers and plugging my iPod in. The sound of The Pussycat Dolls quietly plays, but I crank the volume up, knowing I’m not going to get moaned at for the noise.
When the bass hits, I raise my arms above my head and do my best sexy dance along to the tune. I grind my hips and try to wiggle my bum Beyoncé style while watching myself in my full-length mirror. I look at my new curves and smile that I’m developing my womanly shape at last. Over the last few months, my hips and boobs have really popped out, which I’m unbelievably happy about. I thought I was going to be the only woman to still have a girl’s body; all my friends have been embracing their new figures for ages. I was feeling like their little sister when we all went out.
I reach up behind me and pull the bow holding my bikini top together and throw it on top of the towel on my bed while still shaking my bootie around my room.
I turn and go to change the song when something slow comes on, but a figure stood in my doorway makes me scream and immediately I bring my hands up to cover my boobs.
“Shit,” I say, willing my heart to stop pounding from fright. “I thought you’d all gone out.”
“Your mum and Ruben went to the shop, but it was my turn on the Playstation so I stayed behind.” He runs his eyes up and down my almost naked body and mutters, “And I’m so glad I did.”
My mouth falls open and I watch him checking me out.
What the fuck?
Fin is my big brother’s best friend. They’ve been best friends since they were in nappies. Our mums had been friends since they were kids as well. I’ve pretty much grown up with Fin as an adopted brother. He’s always here and tagging along with our family outings. His mum sadly passed away when he was little, and his dad isn’t very good at doing family things, so we’re the best he’s got.
The only problem with this whole set up is that I don’t love Fin like a brother, like I should. I love Fin in a ‘he is the hottest guy in the world and I want to marry him and have his babies’ kind of way. And this has always been the case. Well, for as long as I can remember.
Ruben and Fin are two years older than me and are both now doing their apprenticeships with my dad. They both think I’m this annoying little girl. Neither of them really have much time for me. As much as I’d love to join them playing the Playstation or even out playing football, I’m not invited or welcome because I’m just a little girl. Yes, I’m pretty bitter about it. I also hate myself for fancying the pants off Fin, because I know he’ll never feel the same way. I wish I could just forget him and find someone who is interested in me.
Fin taking a step forward so that he’s in my room snaps me back to the present. My heart suddenly starts racing for a very different reason the closer he gets.
“I’ve been watching you sun bathing in that little bikini all afternoon. You’ve been driving me insane.”
My heart skips a beat at his words, but then my brain makes itself known.
He’s joking, right?
This must be a huge joke that he thinks is hilarious, but unfortunately will have me crying into my pillow for days, if not weeks.
I square my shoulders in an attempt to cover my hurt. “Whatever. Can you get out so I can shower, please?” I’m actually proud of how strong I sound saying it.
“I’m serious, Con. You look smoking, baby,” he says, as he reaches up to tuck a loose bit of my hair behind my ear.
“Eh…”
“You think I don’t notice you? Well, you’re wrong. I see you. I see all of you.”
I’m too stunned by his words to do anything, and when he wraps his hands around my wrists and gently pulls my hands away from my boobs, I let him. He breaks eye contact with me and stares down at my exposed chest. I watch with fascination as he runs his tongue along his bottom lip before biting down on it. Most girls would be shy about being stared at like this, but I’ve always been overly confident about my body, even with my prior lack of curves. I’m even happier about showing it off now, though.
Between my legs starts pounding like I’ve never experienced before, and I have the sudden urge to grab hold of his hand and shove it down my bikini bottoms.
“Fuck it,” Fin suddenly says, like he’s made some big decision, before taking the final step towards me. He reaches back and pulls his t-shirt over his head at the last minute, and not a second later, the hot, soft skin of his chest presses against my boobs. The feeling of skin on skin is amazing and only makes me want this more.
“You want me to stop, then just say stop. Okay?”
I can’t speak. I just lean farther into him.
“Connie,” he warns. “I need to know you’re with me here and that you’ll stop me if I go too far for you.”
I know he’s saying this because I only turned sixteen a few weeks ago. I am so ready for this, though.
I know Fin has been with girls before because I’ve heard him and Ruben comparing notes. I, however, have dreamed about Fin being my first, I never in a million years thought it would happen though.
My brain eventually starts working enough for me to respond. “I promise, but I won’t be stopping you.”
I watch as he runs his eyes all over my face, I guess to make sure I’m being serious, before he leans in and brushes his lips gently against mine. My whole body ignites with just the simple touch and when he runs his hands over my waist and up my back, goosebumps break out and it feels like my skin tingles from head to toe.
We kiss for ages and it seals my belief of what a first kiss should be. It’s soft to start with, but before long, our desire gets the better of us and it gets rough, like we can’t get enough of each other. I run my hands over as much of Fin’s exposed skin as I can get my hands on. I love how he feels, so smooth and soft but hard at the same time.
Eventually, Fin must decide that it’s time to move on, because he slowly starts to walk me backwards and it’s not long before I feel the backs of my knees hit the bed. He must feel it, because he breaks away from me, runs his eyes down my body and he reaches out to untie my bikini bottoms. He watches as they fall to the floor before running his eyes back up my body. The look in those blues when they meet mine again solidifies my confidence with my body. I’d walk around naked for him every day if it put that look on his face.
He looks at me, almost silently pleading for me not to back out now. He must be joking; there is nothing that could stop me.
I reach out and push his shorts and boxers down over his arse and let them fall to his ankles. The sight of him takes my breath away. He’s everything I thought he would be and more. He is seriously ripped for only an eighteen-year-old. I know he spends plenty of time working out, but I didn’t appreciate quite how much. I grab his hands and pull him down on top of me, stopping any question he might have had as to whether I want this or not.
Well, it was pretty much what I was expecting. Painful. Although I know that Fin has had some experience, it can’t have been that much, because we were mostly just a jumble of limbs rolling around. Having said that, though, he enjoyed himself, and that means more to me than actually enjoying it myself. Fin was my first. No one can take that away from me. I’m seriously hoping that this was the first time of many, and we’ll have plenty of time to master it together.
I’m lying on my side with my head on his chest and one arm and leg wrapped tightly around him. I’m fairly sure he’s fallen asleep from the slowness of his breathing. I lift my head and risk a look up at him. My heart melts when I take in his face. His blonde hair is falling down on to his forehead, his cheeks are flushed and his lips swollen from our kisse
s. I run my eyes down his neck and follow the lines of his chest and stomach before noticing that he’s hard again when I get down that far.
My appreciation of his spectacular body unfortunately gets cut short, though, because I’m suddenly yanked roughly from the bed. A loud growl is emitted before Fin is also pulled from the bed and practically thrown against the wall by my very angry big brother.
I quickly reach over and grab the first thing to hand, Fin’s t-shirt, to cover up as I hear the first grunt of pain when Ruben’s fist connects with Fin’s face.
Present…
“So, this isn’t the first time this has happened then?” Emma asks sadly.
“I’m so sorry. I know I should have learnt my lesson, I know I should have stayed away from him, but it’s impossible.”
She gives me a sympathetic look before saying, “I know how that feels.” I presume she’s talking about trying to stay away from Ruben, but I don’t question her. I’m too consumed with my own life at the moment to put much thought into it. “You don’t have to apologise to me though, Con. I understand, and I knew there was something between you. I just didn’t know the extent of it.”
Emma insists on feeding me before taking me to be with Fin at the hospital, although I barely eat any of it. My mum rang a few minutes ago with an update. Well, I say update, but all she said was that Fin was okay and the doctor was currently with him.
Fin
Feeling something shaking on top of me helps pull me from the fog that is clouding my brain. I try to open my eyelids, but only one of them moves, and even then I have to fight to open it more than just a crack. What the fuck?
The bright artificial light that instantly enters my one eye makes my head pound, so much so that I have to shut it again and wait for the pain to ease.
When I feel able to, I try again. This time, though, I can’t feel the shaking, just a weight and an unbelievable pain in my chest. It takes a few minutes for my eye to focus, and when it does, I’m as confused as I think I’ve ever been. There are spotlights above me, surrounded by ceiling tiles. It’s not until I look in front of me and see a curtain that it suddenly hits me as to where I am. In fucking hospital. I hate fucking hospitals.
A soft noise makes me look down and I instantly realise what the weight is. Connie has her head resting on my chest. She looks to be asleep. I stay still and take the opportunity to take her in. How I ever managed to refuse her is still beyond me. I can’t remember a time when just one look at her didn’t take my breath away. I tried my hardest to do the right thing, though. I really did. But she’s more addictive than any drug to me.
Her face is peaceful in her slumber, but I can see that before she fell asleep she was anything but. Her eyes are red, and she has black make up tracks running down her cheeks from where she has been crying. I suddenly understand what the shaking I was feeling earlier was.
She looks so much younger in her sleep, and I suddenly have a huge feeling of déjà vu.
Ten years ago…
I’ve got the best view in the world. From where I’m sat on Ruben’s bed, I have perfect sight of his little sister, Connie, laid out on a sun lounger in a tiny black bikini. Thankfully, from where he’s sitting to the left of me, he can’t see her. I know this because I checked when he went to get more drinks. The last thing I need is to be caught checking out his sister. He’d kill me. I’ve seen how he’s reacted to guys obviously wanting her before. That kid at school a couple of years ago didn’t see Ruben coming when he made a comment about wanting to tap her. Everyone in school learnt a very important lesson that day. Don’t even look at Connie Foster, let alone touch her.
It’s a real fucking shame that I can’t stop looking at her, and that I dream most days of what it would be like to touch that banging little body she’s rocking. Fuck me, little Fin is getting excited just thinking about it.
Luckily, I just finish adjusting my suddenly tight shorts as Ruben turns to me and hands me the controller. “Here, it’s your turn. I died.”
I just start a new game when Ruben’s mum, Elizabeth, knocks on his bedroom door and enters. “I’m just popping to the shop; you guys want anything?”
Ruben starts rattling off a list including toiletries, and to his mum’s utter horror, condoms. I have to really fight to hold in a laugh at the look on her face.
“Oh for goodness’ sake, Ruben. I am not getting all of that. Come with me.”
He gets himself off the bed with a huff that tells me that he was seriously asking his mum to buy him condoms. I lose my fight, and by the time he turns to me, I have a wide smile on my face and I’m chuckling to myself.
“Yeah, laugh it up, prick. You coming?”
“Nah man, I always make sure I’ve got them things stock piled. No chance of me running out.”
“That’s cos you’re full of shit and you’ve never used one, let alone the box of one hundred you ordered online, you pussy.”
“What the fuck ever, dude. You know as well as I do that I’ve tapped way more pussy than you have.”
“Fuck you,” he quips as he leaves the room, but not before he turns the power off on the TV. Fucker.
I just get the TV back on and I’m starting another game, seeing as I died the minute Ruben turned the power off, when I hear someone coming up the stairs. I glance to the window to see my suspicions are correct. I continue playing and trying to ignore that fact that we are in the house alone and she is wearing that bikini. Fuck, or even less, now she’s in her room. My cock jumps and I lose my battle. My feet are carrying me towards her room before I even realise I’m moving.
Her cheesy pop music fills my ears when I’m halfway down the hall. I can’t believe my fucking luck when I come to a stop in her doorway. There in the centre of the room is Connie, wearing only her bikini bottoms and dancing around to the music. Her eyes are shut, her arms are up in the air, and her tits, fuck me, her tits are bouncing along with the beat.
I know how much shit I’m going to be in, but I can’t move. She has me completely enthralled and I can’t pull my eyes away. She’s too perfect for her own fucking good. Why has she got to be Ruben’s sister? I must have done something serious fucked up in a previous life to be punished like this.
The song comes to an end and I’m about to leave, I swear I am, when she turns and takes one step forward before locking her hazel eyes on mine.
FUCK!
I brace myself for the shouting that’s surely going to come. I mean, I was stood here watching my best friend’s little sister dance around her room basically naked; there’s going to be shouting. But to my surprise, it doesn’t come. Instead, her hands fly up to cover her tits, and after swearing in shock, she just stares at me, her eyes visibly darkening.
I’m so surprised by her lack of reaction that my mouth runs away with itself in excitement. I begin rambling about how I’ve been watching her all afternoon. I can see the scepticism in her eyes that I’m taking the piss out of her, but I couldn’t be further from telling the truth right now. I’m surprised she can’t tell, because it must be obvious as fuck that my cock is trying to break out of my shorts.
I can’t stop myself. I move towards her. I have to touch her.
The next thirty minutes or so are a blur of kisses, caresses and, thankfully, sex. I gave her the option of backing down, but much to my sheer delight, she was with me all the way.
I hate to admit it, and I just know it’s going to haunt me forever, but I was so nervous that I was a complete fumbling idiot. Anyone would think it was my first time. But the knowledge of it being her first time and the fact it was Connie, the girl I’ve been dreaming about ever since I realised girls existed, meant it wasn’t my best performance. I’m pretty sure she never even got off - not cool. The first rule is always that you get the girl off first, even I know that, but as I said, little Fin was so excited that there wasn’t time. I tried to be as gentle as possible so not to hurt her, but I don’t think I’d needed to worry for the short few minutes I was i
n her before I blew.
I know I sound like an arsehole, but the look she gave me afterwards made me feel like a God. Even though she didn’t see stars, she was still acting like she’d just been shown heaven. I pulled out of her, chucked the condom over the side of the bed to sort out later, and pulled her on to my chest. She almost instantly fell asleep and I spent what felt like ages looking down at her. Strands of her mousy brown hair had fallen from its band and were curling around her face. Her eyelashes rested on her pink cheekbones, and her full, swollen, pink lips made my cock twitch in anticipation.
I think I must have fallen asleep with her at some point, because the next thing I know, her weight is off me and I’m being pulled from her bed and thrown across the room. I’m fully conscious by the time I hit the wall with a thud. I look up to see what the hell is going on, and I see Ruben snarling down at me. I glance over at Connie briefly to see that she has pulled my discarded t-shirt on to cover her nakedness.
I put my hands up in surrender to Ruben as I get up off the floor. I’m just about to say something - fuck knows what, mind you - when his fist connects with my nose.
“FUCK!” I shout, as I feel blood start to pour down into my mouth.
Ruben gets a good few punches in before the sound of Connie’s screams alerts her mum, who comes storming into the room, and the two of them just about manage to drag Ruben away from me. I’m impressed they manage it, because they are both tiny, and Ruben is seriously pumped up. Luckily for me, a bit of smooth talking from his mum calms Ruben down and he soon gets sent away. We all stand in silence as we listen to his footsteps pound down the stairs before the front door slams shut.
Angel Series Books #1-2.5 Page 95