by Natalie Dean
As she turned her back to the woman, something on the wall caught Bess’s eye. There were dozens of papers tacked up with pins. She’d been in this store a hundred times but had never before noticed these ads. At first, Bess was going to dismiss them as useless, but as the woman was still at the counter buying her eggs, Bess decided to look busy by skimming the contents of the papers.
Then she saw one that really caught her attention.
Looking for a Bride
Lonely farmer looking for companionship. Can’t offer much, but can put a roof over your head and treat you good. Looking for pretty young lady with an eye toward matrimony.
~William Miller
Bess’s heart began to pound in her chest, and she reached up, pulling the paper free of its tack. Turning it over, she could see that it had come from Wyoming territory. That wasn’t quite all the way to the coast, but it was a good distance from New York City. A plan was beginning to form in the back of her mind, and for the first time that day, Bess began to feel a slight glimmer of hope.
That morning she had stood by the grave of her husband, and now she was considering marrying another man she had never met. Bess shook her head as she tucked the ad in her pocket.
In just four short days her life had completely changed.
Heading West
Bess glanced nervously over her shoulder. There were dozens of men and women milling about the train platform, but it didn’t appear as though any of them were paying any mind to her. She sighed and shifted nervously from one foot to the other. She had been standing on this platform in the early morning light for nearly an hour, and she was more than ready to get on the train.
Though there was a chill in the air, the gentle breeze promised a warm day, so Bess had dressed lightly for the journey. She still had the ad in her pocket, and she fidgeted with a train ticket in her hand. The night she had found the ad, she had gone home and penned a response to Mr. Miller immediately, telling him she was an orphan in a dire situation and was desperately looking for a place to live.
She assured him she was more than willing to help with the chores on the farm, and that she wasn’t looking for anything fancy, just a quiet life she could live in peace. Bess had included a detailed description of herself, hoping she had given the man enough of an idea of what she looked like that he would be able to find her quickly once she arrived in Wyoming.
At the end of the letter, Bess once again reminded Mr. Miller of her desperation, telling him she was going to follow the letter shortly, and therefore he ought not to reply to the letter in the post. Not only did Bess wish to get out of town as quickly as possible, but she knew if the wrong people got their hands on the letter, they would be able to track her down.
Bess had posted the letter the same night she had written it, hoping that it would go out in the post first thing in the morning. She had then gathered what little money she had left and purchased a train ticket. She was thrilled that there was still a seat available for the train leaving that same week, meaning she would only have to wait a few days before she was able to leave this awful town – and the memories it held – behind her.
The only person she had told was Sheriff Muldoon who, though he was glad to hear she was leaving town, was concerned about the decision she had made. In spite of all his inquiries as to who she was going to marry and where she was headed, Bess declined to answer. She insisted the less anyone knew about her, the better – an opinion which Sheriff Muldoon strongly disagreed with when it came to himself. But, Bess reminded him her options were limited and her time was short, and he eventually agreed with her decision.
Now, as Bess blinked against the rising sun and waited to be allowed to board the train, she couldn’t help but feel a pang run through her heart. Though fear had been the primary emotion she had felt the past few days, Bess also realized she was leaving her husband, whom she had loved, behind in that cold cemetery, and that realization hurt.
Bess shook her head, trying to knock the emotions out of her mind. In her letter to Mr. Miller, Bess had intentionally refrained from telling him that she was a widow. She had said nothing about the gang and nothing about the threat she was under. Bess figured the less he knew about her dark past, the better. Feeling as though someone was watching her, she suddenly whirled around. Men and women were walking about, but again, no one seemed to be paying any attention to her.
I’ve got to settle down. I’m bound to attract more attention to myself if I keep acting this way than if I were to simply act like anyone else. Besides, even if they do see me getting on this train, they will have no idea where I am going, Bess thought as she smoothed the front of her skirts and picked up the carpetbag she had packed.
At long last, the conductor stepped out of the engine and walked over to the train car, calling out to those who were waiting on the platform. At once, the dozens of men and women who had been waiting pushed forward, cutting in front of Bess and pushing to get on the train first. Bess cried out in pain as someone stepped on her foot, then shook her head at their rudeness when they didn’t bother to stop to see if she was injured.
With a slight limp, Bess finally made her way to the door of the coach and handed her ticket to the conductor.
“Morning, Miss, and where are we headed today?” he asked casually, and her tongue caught in her throat. The sheriff had been adamant about her keeping her travels a secret, and she quickly reminded herself she didn’t know anything about this man. Her husband had shown her that anyone could be part of a gang and hide it well, and by telling him where she was going, she may very well be telling the men from the gang exactly where she was headed.
“I’m just going to see where the wind takes me,” she said at last with a nervous laugh. The conductor punched a hole in her ticket and looked at her with an odd expression on his face, then he gave her a curt nod.
“Very well, move along then.”
Bess gathered her carpetbag to her chest as she walked through the narrow aisle in the center of the train coach. Men and women had filled many of the seats already, and Bess felt that they all had their eyes on her as she clung to her bag and walked toward the back of the coach. She had never ridden on a train before, and she wondered just how safe it really was.
Bess selected the very last bench seat in the coach and sat down with a thud. She had intended to be more graceful, but at the moment she went to sit down, it felt as though her knees simply buckled, and she had no choice but to sit down hard. Two of the women who were seated on the bench in front of her glanced over their shoulders then exchanged a look with each other, and Bess felt her cheeks burn with embarrassment.
At first, she slid over in her seat to be as close to the window as possible, hiding her face from the other passengers on the train, but she soon realized that anyone who was on the street could see her. Immediately, Bess slid back toward the other side of the seat, stopping about halfway across the bench seat. She could still feel the judgmental glances from the women in the seat in front of her, but she didn’t care.
Squaring her shoulders, Bess sat up straight and proud, trying to present herself as far more confident than she felt. At long last, the conductor gave the final call, and the doors to each of the coaches were closed. Bess started when she felt the shudder run through each of the coaches, then all at once, the train began to move forward. She looked out the window from her safe position and marveled at how fast the buildings were rushing past. Bess took a deep breath then let it out slowly, feeling more relaxed now that she was on the move.
She was leaving all her problems behind, and all that lay ahead was a new beginning – the fresh start she needed.
Mr. William Miller
“Next stop, South Pass City! Next stop, South Pass City!” the conductor cried as he walked through the train car. Bess marveled at how he could walk in and out of each of the train cars without being frightened, as she felt she would get dizzy and fall off if she tried to do the same thing. Relief rushed over her, and sh
e sat up, her aching joints protesting her every move.
She had been traveling for days, and though she reminded herself it was much faster – and far more comfortable than traveling by stagecoach, it was still taxing on her small frame, and every part of her was ready to get off the train. As the days passed, Bess tried to focus on the positive of her journey, rather than think about what must be happening back in New York.
She trusted Sheriff Muldoon to be true to his word and stay on the case until justice was brought to her husband, and she hoped that he would tell her when he managed to find the man who was responsible for Jacob’s death. At the same time, she knew with each passing day that the end of her three-week time limit was drawing near, and she was no closer to having any of the money than she had been in the beginning.
So, Bess decided to focus her thoughts on what her new husband may look like. She wondered if he was going to be tall like Jacob had been, and she wondered what color his eyes were going to be. She didn’t even know how old of a man he was, and part of her wondered if he was going to be much older than her like a father, or closer to her age than even Jacob had been.
You’ll soon find out, she thought.
The small town was rising up in the distance, and Bess felt the palms of her hands grow sweaty. She never was one to get nervous for things, unless, of course, she didn’t know what to expect. And right now, she definitely didn’t know what to expect.
South Pass City was a mining town, and she knew many of the men who lived there were after gold. However, she could see that the land was green and the rolling hills stretched on for miles, making the prospect of farming promising. Bess leaned closer toward the window as the train pulled into town.
Men, women, and children stopped to watch the engine as it slowed to a stop, and Bess immediately felt that everyone was staring at her. Unlike the large, wooden platform that had been back in New York, this platform was narrow, with only enough room to help passengers disembark from the train.
She waited as the train pulled to a complete stop, and her knees felt weak as she rose. Bess wanted to stand at the top of the stairs and scan the faces of those who had gathered, but the people behind her were just as eager to get off the train, and it wasn’t long before Bess was prodded forward.
Once her feet lighted on the ground, Bess could smell the fresh air. It was different than New York. Less stuffy.
Suddenly, she noticed a man to the left waving at her. Bess was grateful she had taken the time to describe herself so carefully, right down to the dress she was going to wear when she arrived. Pushing her way through the crowd, she stopped in front of the man.
“Mr. Miller?” she asked, and he nodded as he beamed down at her.
“Yes, but please, call me Will,” he said extending his hand. To her surprise, he didn’t shake her hand, but rather lifted her fingers to his lips and gave them a light kiss. A shy smile flashed across her face, and she felt her cheeks flush red.
“Bess Brown, but of course Bess is just fine,” she said timidly.
“Pleasure to meet you, Miss Brown,” Will said, and Bess bit her tongue. She had nearly corrected him, but she reminded herself she hadn’t told him she was a widow.
“I’m sure you’re tired, but the preacher is only going to be in town for another two days – I thought we could get the formality over with tonight, then you can take your time getting settled in?” he half -asked as he looked at her. Bess paused for a moment, then realizing he was asking her to get married right then, she stumbled over her words.
“Oh, yes – of course, I suppose that would be the best way to go about things.” Bess smiled, but there was another one of those familiar pangs in her heart. Less than two weeks prior, she had been married to another man. This was all happening so fast.
A broad smile spread across Will’s face, and he took her carpetbag, then offered her his other arm.
“Don’t worry, though my house – our house – is cozy, I’ve got the bedroom set up for you to settle in with privacy. I’ll sleep in the living room until you are fully comfortable, and please, take as much time as you need.” He went on to explain how his house was decorated, but really needed a woman’s touch, as he had been a bachelor his entire life.
“I have some family, my father died when I was just a lad, but my mother remarried a man who had a son that was close to my age. My parents still live in Georgia, but my brother and I both moved. He went north to New York and well, I came West.’
“Gold is what brought me out here initially, but I fell in love with the land. I guess you could say that there’s more kinds of gold out there than just the yellow rock,” he winked at her, and Bess nodded, though she was finding it difficult to concentrate on what he was saying.
Instead, she was doing her best to look him over without him realizing that she was. He was indeed tall, though she didn’t think he was quite so tall as Jacob. He was leanly built, if not a bit muscular. It was evident from the moment she saw him that he spent a lot of time out in the weather. His hair was brown, his eyes were an even darker brown, and he had a short beard.
She could see kindness in his face, and his smile was enough to make her heart skip a beat in spite of her grief. Suddenly, Bess realized that he had asked her a question.
“Yes, my parents passed when I was very young. I don’t have any siblings or anything – just me, really. It’s been rather a lonely life for me up until now, I’ve always spent most of my time on my own.” Bess didn’t think what she had said was a complete lie, as she had spent most of her marriage wondering where Jacob was and what he was doing. There was no need to mention him.
He wasn’t part of this situation.
Will suddenly stopped, and Bess looked around in confusion, wondering why they were stopping at this old building.
“I know it’s not much, but we use what we can,” he said with a chuckle, and Bess suddenly realized they were in front of a small church. Bess thought it looked more like a shanty than a church, but she didn’t complain.
“He’s expecting us – I told him you were coming, and if you were willing to get the ceremony over with immediately, we would stop in,” Will explained as he held the door open for her. Bess once again nodded, though she couldn’t think of anything to say.
She was about to get married for the second time.
An Honest Living
Bess had to be honest. She had no idea what to expect. When she had married Jacob, there was quite a few people at their wedding. She had known enough people from the orphanage to invite, and he had an extensive list of connections. She remembered the day well – she had worn her Sunday best and felt like a queen.
But now, the only people in the room besides herself and William were the pastor and his wife. They were both old and also very kind, and though Bess was nervous, she did feel comfortable with the decision she had made.
“Just stand over here, Dear,” the old woman said as she pulled Bess in front of her husband. She turned Bess to face Will, then she brought their hands together. With a kind smile and a gentle pat on the shoulder, she then stepped aside and clasped her hands in front of her.
Bess did her best to pay attention to what the preacher was saying, but she felt almost as though she was watching herself recite the vows. They were very much the same vows she had said to Jacob, but when she had repeated the vows to him, she had meant every word. She now felt that she was merely going along with the situation. There was no feeling, no passion.
Then, all at once, it was done. She signed the marriage license where she was told to sign, and she was suddenly Mrs. Miller. Bess felt numb as she walked out of the tiny church next to her new husband, but she assured him she was alright when he asked how she was feeling.
“Just tired. It has been a very long day,” she said with a sigh. He agreed and helped her get into the wagon. They rode to his little farmhouse in silence, but Bess’s thoughts were running through her mind a hundred miles an hour.
Bess
was surprised at how quickly she was able to settle into her new life. William had been correct when he said the house was cozy – she thought their house in New York City had been small, but this was even smaller still. However, he had done his best to make the bedroom as comfortable as possible for her, and she appreciated the vase of flowers he had picked and placed on the window sill.
Bess was used to spending her days primarily alone, and it was going to be an adjustment having Will there most of the time. Though it was true that he spent much of his time out in the fields or in the barn tending to the animals and the land, he was still in the house for every meal and at night.
Bess was pleased that she had taught herself to be as good of a cook as she was. She could tell from the first time she made them breakfast that he was impressed with her skills – which she credited to the years she spent as a waitress in New York.
“They did you a service, to be sure,” Will said with a large bite of pancakes in his mouth.
The days passed quickly, and soon became weeks and eventually a couple of months had passed. Bess thought the time passed quickly on the prairie, and she felt it was because she spent much more of her time actively doing things rather than sitting by the window and wondering where her husband was or what he was doing.
Every day Bess made an effort to be up and have breakfast on the table before the sun was up. Though the kitchen was close to the living room, Will assured her that she did not bother him when she was up before he was. If there was one thing she admired about this man, it was his great respect for her. Never once did she feel uncomfortable or awkward around him, and she knew that anything she asked of him, he would do for her in a heartbeat.
Companionship quickly grew between them, and before even the first month had passed, Bess thought of Will as her dear friend. She looked forward to the time they spent together, and she missed him when he was out in the fields all day. Yet, she was still careful to conceal as much of her past as she possibly could, and she took note that he didn’t speak much of his family, either. Before long, it felt that the two of them were locked in their own little world, untouchable by anyone.