by Natalie Dean
The sun came up, and the sun went down, and Bess felt she was safe out on the prairie. There was no one who could find her out here, and no one who could hurt her. No one knew who she was, where she came from, or the dark secret of her past. She felt free to forget about it all. To pretend like none of those terrible things ever happened to her.
But, even with the great respect she could feel from William, and with the blossoming love she could feel toward him, there was something about him that she didn’t trust. Bess didn’t know what it was, or why she felt the way she did, but when he said he was going into town to get supplies, she had to fight the urge to accompany him. Yes, it was true that he would come home with the very supplies he had said he was going to go get, and he was always home within a couple of hours of going into town. But no matter how hard she tried, or how much she fought her feelings, she couldn’t fully place her trust in him.
Her distrust would keep her up at night, and there had even been times when she crept to the door of her room and peered through the crack, ensuring he was still sleeping in the living room as he assured her he was going to.
She had been told before that her husband was living an honest life. She had been told that the money they had came from sales he made and that he was selling products that were genuinely useful to people. She had believed all these things when Jacob had told them to her, and she had known that man for years. Finding out that he had been lying to her made her question anything anyone told her.
After all, how did she know Will wasn’t part of some illegal operation himself? How did she know the money he brought home was from the wheat he sold, and that he hadn’t instead robbed some poor miner of the gold he had worked so hard for? How did she know he was really going into town when he said that he was?
Though Bess desperately wanted to believe him, and though she spent hours telling herself that there was no other possible explanation for what her husband was doing, she still struggled.
After all, was there even such a thing as making a good, honest living?
Dark Secrets
“I’m going to be a little longer in town than usual, I’ve got a meeting with someone who might want to buy Scout,” Will said at breakfast one morning. Scout was a three-year-old stallion Will had raised from a colt, and he was worth a lot of money. With the summer months beginning to wane, Will was thinking ahead toward winter, and he wanted to get the supplies they needed as soon as possible.
At his words, Bess felt a twinge of mistrust fill her heart. She didn’t want to feel this way towards Will, but whenever Jacob told her that he was going to be longer than usual, she knew that meant he could be gone for days.
“Can I come?” she blurted out suddenly. Will looked at her in surprise.
“I don’t think you would really enjoy it. Business talk can take a couple of hours, especially since I want to get the most for him that I can,” Will explained, looking at her with a curious look on his face as he did so. The feeling of mistrust grew.
“I’d really like to go, it’s been a while since I’ve gotten out of the house, and it can get a little stuffy in here,” she looked around the room and fanned herself with her hand as she did so. William continued to look at her with the same odd look on his face.
“Another time, Darling, I really do want to give this my full attention, and I won’t be able to do that if I am worried that you aren’t having a good time.” He smiled as he reached over and rubbed her hand, but Bess felt the distrust in her heart quickly turning to anger. She forced a smile after a moment of silence, then gave a curt nod.
“As you wish,” she said, a little too sweetly.
Will gave her another curious look, but let the subject drop. They both finished their meal in silence, and after breakfast, Bess stood watching as William saddled one of the team and placed a halter around Scout’s face. She bent her elbows and hung her hands around the back of her neck, both hating the distrust she was feeling in her heart as well as blaming Will for being the one to put it there.
The morning passed slowly, and with each passing hour, Bess dreamt up new scenarios of things Will could possibly be doing. Her logical side told her that he was doing exactly as he said – after all, he had proven to her many times that he did what he said he was going to do. However, another part of her dreamt that he was somehow involved with a band of outlaws and that they were committing some terrible crime.
It was only a three-mile walk to town. Bess knew she could get there within an hour if she wished. After pacing back and forth, she simply couldn’t take it anymore.
She was going to go find out if he was really doing what he said he was.
Bess shielded her eyes against the sun as she walked into town. It always appeared to be hotter there than it was out on the prairie, and Bess fanned herself as she stepped along the walkway. Unlike New York City, the walkways in the West were made of boards. Her shoes left a hollow sound on each one as she stepped across it, making Bess feel gaudy and awkward.
She stepped as lightly as she could, looking around the streets for her husband. Though the town was small, there were many dark alleyways between the buildings. It reminded her of New York, and how she had always been careful to avoid such places.
She had no idea where he would be meeting with this man, nor did she know where many of the businesses in town were. Though she had been living in the area for a couple of months, she spent most of her time out at the house instead of in town.
Suddenly, she saw something she recognized. Scout was tethered to a hitching post outside of the saloon. She didn’t see her husband’s other horse, and she felt suspicion immediately swell in her heart. Putting her hands in her pockets, she did her best to keep out of sight as she drew closer to the saloon. He had told her that he wasn’t a drinking man, but why else would he be in a saloon? She wanted to get a glimpse of Will – to see what he was really doing. But, he was nowhere in sight.
She lightly crept up to the saloon, trying to peer inside without anyone seeing her.
“Bess?” a voice from behind her caused her to whirl around. To her dismay, Will stood behind her, mounted on his horse.
“What are you doing here?” he asked with a raised eyebrow. Bess smoothed her skirts. There was no answer she could give that would explain why she was there. It was obvious why she was there – and she knew that he knew the answer.
“I- well, I…,” she stammered, fidgeting with her skirts.
“Did you follow me? Why would you do that? Don’t you trust me?” he asked as he looked down at her. Bess had tears in her eyes as she looked up at him. She couldn’t tell him the truth – she had hidden it this long, she simply couldn’t.
“It’s just that I’ve never really been able to trust anyone before, and I came all the way out here to marry you, and I don’t know where you go or anything. She allowed sobs to take over and buried her face in her hands. William didn’t say anything for a moment, and Bess desperately wished that he would.
At last, he sighed and rode over to her, holding his hand down to her.
“Is there some reason why you feel you can’t trust me?” he asked. His tone was a mix of hurt and anger. Bess put her hand in his and he pulled her up onto the horse behind him. As she wrapped her arms around his waist, she sighed and looked off into the distance.
“No, Will, there isn’t. And, I’m sorry. Can you forgive me?” she leaned her cheek on his shoulder as she asked, but he said nothing. Bess felt her stomach tie into knots as they rode home in silence, and she desperately wanted to know what Will was thinking. When they got home, she climbed off the back of the horse, and Will turned it toward the stable.
“Will?” Bess asked, and he stopped.
“I really am sorry,” she said with emotion in her voice. He looked down at the ground, then sighed.
“Are you sure there is nothing that happened to you that makes you not trust me? I’ve done nothing but proven to you how much I care about you since the day you arri
ved. Why would you feel like you needed to follow me?” he looked at her with searching eyes, and Bess almost told him the truth. But, there was something in her that told her it would be a terrible idea.
If he knew that she had a gang after her, if he knew that she had been married before him, if he knew she hadn’t told him any of these things in all these months she had lived with him – he’d throw her out of the house. She just knew he would.
She shook her head with conviction.
“No, nothing happened.”
Bad Company
“I’m going into town this afternoon, and I was wondering if you wanted to join?” Will asked with a smile. He had just come in from tending to the crops, and Bess was setting the table for lunch.
She had made sandwiches, his favorite.
“What are you going to be doing?” she asked in surprise. Will never asked her to join him unless he was doing something that he knew she would also enjoy – and that was rare.
“Oh, nothing special. Just thought it would be nice to spend some time together is all,” he said with a rather dismissive attitude. A slow smile spread across Bess’s face. There was no end to the ways this man made her feel special, and she greatly enjoyed spending time with him.
“I’d love to,” she said cheerfully. Will was already diving into the sandwiches, and he nodded.
“Just as long as you don’t get bored,” he said with a wink, and she blushed. She still felt bad about following him into town as she had, but it was clear he was doing his best to ignore the situation and forget about it. There was no need to bring it up again, after all, she had apologized, and she had assured him it was merely because of how she grew up.
Bess, on the other hand, was determined to overcome her distrust of him and move on with her life. She had used the months to grieve her husband, and she was ready to let go of the situation. She had to move on with her life, or her life was going to be ruined. Jacob had made bad decisions, but his bad decisions didn’t have to ruin her life as it did his, but she had to be the one with the strength to move on.
“I thought I’d hitch up the wagon, then maybe we can take the long way home,” Will said between bites of his sandwich. Bess clapped her hands for joy. She loved it when he took her the long way home. There were so many beautiful sights nearby, from valleys that stretched on for miles to immense buffalo herds. Those massive creatures with their great horns both terrified her and thrilled her all at the same time.
“I’ll hurry with the dishes,” Bess said once she finished her sandwich. Will nodded, and headed outside to hitch up the team.
Bess sat in the wagon looking about the town. William had gone inside the general store to pick up a few things he needed in the barn, and Bess really didn’t enjoy listening to him bargain with the general store owner. She felt that her presence added pressure to the situation, as though he felt he ought to get more supplies for the price he was paying. Bess had assured him more than once that she didn’t know anything about farming or the cost that was involved, and therefore he ought not to feel pressured when she was standing there next to him, but she knew though he said he didn’t, he did.
She didn’t mind waiting in the wagon. It was a beautiful day – the sun was high in the sky, the bright, puffy clouds were floating lazily along the deep blue expanse, and the gentle breeze kissed her cheeks and ran through her hair as it blew by. She knew she ought to be wearing a bonnet, as the sun would make her freckle, but she also loved the freedom she felt when the breeze ran through her hair, and she decided it was worth the risk.
She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, then let it out slowly as she opened them once more. There were men and women walking about, but none were paying any attention to her. Though she had been in town a few months, she didn’t know many people who lived there, and she was okay with that. Miners were always passing through, each after gold and gold alone.
There weren’t as many women in town, and Bess had quickly gotten the impression that the women who did live there were content to say hello to her and leave their acquaintance at that.
Suddenly, something caught her eye, and she immediately felt sick to her stomach. There, at the other end of the street, were three men. She immediately recognized how they stood out from the crowd, and even more than that she immediately recognized the face of one of them.
Victor French.
“Oh, no! No! No! No! No! No!” Bess whispered to herself. She felt tears forming in her eyes and panic settle into her heart. They were a good distance up the street, and they weren’t looking in her direction, but Bess yanked on her bonnet strings anyway. She quickly tied the bow beneath her throat and sunk into the seat, feeling panic consume her.
Will came out of the store whistling a tune, but he stopped when he saw her.
“What on Earth? What’s wrong? You’re white as a sheet!” he exclaimed as he leapt up into the wagon.
“We have to go. We have to go – right now!” Bess said frantically. She glanced back up the street, but she lost sight of the three men.
“Will, let’s go!” her voice rose with intensity, though she fought to keep it under control. She frantically looked up and down the street, trying to get a glimpse of where the men had gone. William sat down on the wagon seat and put his hands on her shoulders.
“Bess! You have to tell me what is wrong with you? What’s going on? What happened?” he kept asking, looking up the street in the same direction she had. All that was up the street now were miners and settlers – each one looking like they belonged in the little town. Without answering him, Bess reached down and grabbed the reins.
“We have to go right now!” she hissed.
“Whoa, whoa, whoa, okay. We’re going,” Will said as he took the reins from her. She had never driven a team before in her life and had no idea how powerful the animals really were. Will looked at her with a mixed look. She could see that he was angry with her for how she was acting, but that he was also gravely concerned.
Something had happened when he was in the store, but she was so panicked that she couldn’t – or wouldn’t – let him know what it was. He turned the wagon toward home and slapped the reins on the backs of the horses. He coaxed them into a canter, but Bess kept looking back over her shoulder.
Though she couldn’t see the men nor any sign of them, she couldn’t shake the feeling that they were right behind her – following her. As they pulled out of town, she began to relax a little – though not much.
“Do you want to tell me what’s going on?” Will asked, a tone of impatience in his voice.
Bess sat silently for a moment, looking only at the road in front of them. She shook her head slightly, then leaned forward in her seat and buried her face in her hands. It was then that she burst into tears.
The Truth Comes Out
“Madam, I am certain Jacob now understands how serious I am, and it annoys me that I have to reach out to his wife to settle this business. However, I see now if something is to be done properly, I am going to have to do it myself.
Your husband owes me fifteen hundred dollars. As he is now dead and unable to pay himself, that means the responsibility falls to you. I am not a patient man, but I do know how to treat a lady well – so I will give you three weeks to come up with the money.
I advise you that it is in your best interest not to take this to the sheriff. Signed, Boss
“Bess, what is this?” William read the note out loud, then looked at his wife who was seated at the table in front of him. She had her head in her hands, and there were still tears running down her cheeks.
“I – I – have something to tell you,” she replied, sniffing and running her hand beneath her nose. He looked at her with inquisitive eyes.
“I was married to a man named Jacob Brown when I lived in New York City. I thought that he was an upstanding man who was a traveling businessman – at least, that’s what he told me. Truth is, I never saw him, he was incredibly secretive, and one night, he
turned up dead.” Her voice cracked, and she waded the kerchief she was holding in her hands. The stone-cold silence from William prompted her to continue.
“Sheriff Muldoon – he’s the head officer of the city – he came with two of his deputies and told me what had happened. Then, at the funeral, a man – one of the men I know I saw today – handed me this note. Of course, I went to the sheriff once more, and he told me my husband was involved with this gang. They’ve come after me. They’ve come for the money!” she sobbed into her kerchief, and William stood where he was, silently shaking his head in disbelief.
“And you never told me?” he asked, hurt and anger mixed in his tone.
She looked up at him, her eyes red from crying. Tears brimming over and running down her cheeks.
“How could I? What was I to say? ‘Dear Mr. Miller, I am running for my life from a gang, can I marry you and hide in your house?’” she scoffed and shook her head, looking away. William was silent for a moment, then he walked over and sat down at the table.
“I suppose that wouldn’t have been what I wanted to hear, but I would have liked to have known that you had been married before, that you have been lied to before, and that’s why you don’t trust me. All this time I thought that I had done something wrong.” William shook his head.
“No! No, it was never you. You are the kindest, most loving and honest man I have ever met. I love you, William, and I am so very sorry I brought this down on you. I’m going to make this right. It’s me they want. It’s me.” Bess put her hands over her husband’s, and she forced a smile. He gave her a weak smile in return.