by Green, Maree
“Maybe you could just take it slow, you know? You’ve already started hanging around him at lunch. All you have to do is just start talking to him a bit more where people can see you. If they could see you guys gradually interacting a bit more each day, it won’t be like, ‘Holy crap! Did you know Jace and Mia are together?’. Do you know what I mean?”
I nodded even though she couldn’t see me. I knew she was right. I did. But it was still scary as all shit. What was the alternative though? As far as I could see, there were only three choices. Stay secret, make it public, or break up. Staying secret was only going to work for so long, and like Kaeli said, it made Jace’s life more difficult. Breaking up was…well, I didn’t even want to think about that. It hurt something inside me. That only left one option.
“I’m going to try it.”
Silence greeted me from the other end of the line. “You are?” Kaeli’s voice was all shock.
“Yes,” I said, feeling more confident with each breath. “As long as you’re with me.”
“I’m always with you, babe.”
We said our goodbyes and I decided to go have a shower and get ready for Jace. Having finally made a decision about going public, I was suddenly finding myself getting a little bit excited. I thought about telling Jace, but I decided to just ease myself into it, and just see how things progressed naturally.
Pulling on my silk nightie, I slipped into bed and opened my kindle.
An hour later, I heard the patio door slide open and I smiled. Jace slipped off his shoes and climbed over the bed, coming to lie down beside me. “Hello, beautiful,” he whispered before kissing me thoroughly.
My hands came up so I could bury my fingers in his hair, and I kissed him hard, sliding my tongue into his mouth. He pulled me closer, running his hand down over my hip until he reached the hem of my nightie and slipped his hand underneath, retracing it’s path back up again on my naked skin.
I gasped at how good it felt and moved my hands down his back, over the hard contours of his muscles. I yanked at his shirt, frantic to pry it off. Jace shifted to make it easier for me, and I finally succeeded. My hands went straight to his chest, and I slowly ran them down over the hard shape of his pecs and down to the contours of his abs.
When they skimmed lower, his stomach muscles tensed and he gently bit my bottom lip. I pressed myself harder against him, feeling his excitement growing, and I knew what I wanted to do.
Kissing my way down his chest, I took my time to explore every hard line. When I reached the button on his jeans, I quickly released it and lowered the zipper. Kneeling between his legs, I grabbed hold of the waist band of his jeans and, as Jace lifted his hips off the bed, I pulled them down.
His erection sprang free before me, and I eagerly took it in my hand and slowly moved it up and down his hard length. Jace groaned and my desire to pleasure him soared. Leaning forward, I licked up the length of him, letting my tongue swirl around the tip, then I slowly sucked him deep into my mouth.
“Fuck, Mia…”
His hands came down to cup my head, his fingers tensing against my scalp. I looked up to see him watching me with the darkest hunger I’d ever seen in his eyes, and my insides felt like they’d burst into flames. I sucked harder, sliding him back out until I could swirl my tongue around the tip again.
Jace’s head fell back against the bed and I heard his breath coming hard and fast. I sucked him in again, this time taking him all the way to the back of my throat while continuing to move my hand up and down at the base of him. Then I started to move faster, bobbing my head up and down while pumping my hand with determination.
Jace’s hands tensed, holding me while he started to thrust his hips upwards, his breath rasping and heavy. He lifted his head again and I met his gaze with a lust-filled one of my own. The sound that escaped him was pure animal. It sounded like a choked growl.
He thrust harder, and I sucked him deeper. Then I felt him twitch in my mouth, and he let out a groan. “Mia…”
The first spurt of hot liquid that hit the back of my throat surprised me, but when I realized he was coming, I gripped his hips tighter and swallowed.
The last time I’d done this, Jace had pulled out when he came. To have him so out of control that he couldn’t stop himself from coming in my mouth, did amazing things to my confidence.
I slowly continued to suck him in and out, swallowing every last drop of come, until his body began to relax underneath me, then I gently kissed my way up his chest. When I got to his jaw, he took my face in his hands and kissed me deep. I was surprised he would after what I’d just done, but he didn’t seem to care.
Breaking the kiss, he closed his eyes and pressed our foreheads together, breathing hard.
I stayed there for a while, silently waiting for him to return from wherever he’d disappeared to. When his hold on me loosened, I pulled up the blanket and shifted so I was snuggled into his side. Jace rolled so he was facing me, zipping up his jeans before wrapping both his arms around me.
“You didn’t have to do that, but I’m fucking glad you did.”
I grinned. Yep, it was definitely time to make my status in his life known.
Chapter 26
Jace
I arrived at school to find the paparazzi camped out at the gate, and about a dozen more girls than usual waiting to jump all over me. Admittedly, the paparazzi camp out only consisted of two dudes with cameras, but it was still the fucking paparazzi.
I knew their presence meant that we were finally going places, and I had to admit I found that slightly cool, but the girls were just annoying. They didn’t give a shit about me – or my music for that matter. They were just after some lame social status, and that did nothing for me.
It was easy to see how guys in the same situation could get caught up in the whole pussy conquest thing though. I had no doubt I could get any of the chicks standing there to drop her panties for me with just one word, but I wasn’t some fucking geek band boy who’d been hard up for a fuck over the last few years and now found himself in a position equivalent to a kid in a fucking candy shop.
The truth was, I’d had more than my fair share of girls over the last four years, and having a hundred more willing to spread their legs for me didn’t put stars in my eyes. To be honest, since that very first night with Mia in Aspen, I knew I didn’t want that anymore. The way Mia made me feel was like a fucking drug, and it surpassed anything and everything any other girl could ever do to me.
“Hi, Jace.”
I looked up to see a chick with short blonde hair batting her eyelashes at me. Seriously? Did these chicks really think that shit worked? She ran her hand up my arm, her fingers groping under the sleeve of my shirt and curling around my bicep. I looked down at her hand then back up to her face pointedly. She didn’t take the hint. Fuck. Who was she anyway? I didn’t even remember seeing her at school before. She was probably a fucking freshman or something.
I shrugged her hand off and stepped to the side, only to encounter another blonde girl ready to take her place. Holy fucking shit.
“Hey, Jace. I love the new song you guys have on YouTube. You must be pretty stoked to be going on tour with The Dark Hybrid.”
I vaguely recognized the chick from my English class. Rebecca, or Renee, or something like that. When her hands started making their way up my chest, I sidestepped her too. “Thanks. Yeah, The Hybrid are awesome.”
Glancing around, I saw Aiden’s car pull into the lot and start to drive towards me. My gaze automatically went to the passenger seat where Mia sat, and I felt a surge of some weird assed energy go through me. The urge to just grab her and stake my claim seemed to be getting stronger, and having all these girls hanging off me only made it worse.
I met Mia’s gaze through the windscreen and saw a slight weariness there as she took in the girls around me. It worried me that I didn’t know if it came from the fact that I was surrounded by girls, or if it was because of the crowd itself. I didn’t like not kn
owing that about my own girlfriend.
To be honest, it was not knowing the reason for her phobia of crowds that worried me most. I’d convinced her to try this with me without really knowing if what I was doing was right. I mean, the number of people that flocked to us was obviously growing every day. Was I only setting her up for something she couldn’t handle?
I sighed as I watched Aiden park. The only way I was going to be able to answer that was if I knew where her phobia came from, and Mia was the only one who could answer that. I needed to get her to open up to me about it.
“Hey, man,” Matt said as he came up behind me.
I turned to see both him and Dean standing there, thankfully taking a lot of the groupie pressure off me. A bunch surged towards Aiden too as he stepped out, and I moved a little further away, positioning myself so I was closer to where Mia was climbing from the car.
I wasn’t planning on saying anything. I just wanted to be closer to her, but when she met my gaze and gave me a shy but purposeful smile, I couldn’t help myself. “Good morning.”
I watched her take a deep breath and nervously look behind me. “Hi.”
Aiden moved around the car towards us, bringing all his attachments with him and making Mia tense. I wanted to growl at him to back the fuck up. “Okay?” I asked quietly.
“I…” her gazed darted between all the girls, Aiden, and me.
“I’ll see you at lunch hey, Mi?” Aiden said over my shoulder.
She met Aiden’s gaze and nodded softly. “Yeah, sure.”
Kaeli appeared from nowhere then, giving me a sympathetic smile before taking Mia’s arm and leading her away.
“You ready, man?” Dean asked from beside me.
I was more than ready to get away from this crowd. I nodded. “Yep. Let’s do it.”
***
Lunch seemed to be the only objective in my day. Everything I did was with a purpose that would bring me a step closer to that time. I didn’t even bother trying to convince myself that it had to do with anything other than Mia.
I timed my approach carefully, watching for the exact moment she would start heading out to the green, before striding out and taking a seat on a vacant bench. Much to my satisfaction, Mia arrived a few seconds after me and slid down beside me, with Kaeli taking the seat beside her.
“Hey,” I said, trying to sound casual. Yeah, I was a dick.
“Hi.”
Her answer was soft and shy, but there was a little teasing shine in her eyes. It made me want to grab her and tickle her so I could hear the little giggle I knew would be just under the surface. “Have you had a good morning?”
She bit her lip, making me want to do the same. “It’s been…long…” she said cryptically.
“Mmm…I think I know what you mean.”
“Hey, Jace…”
I turned to see Melissa sitting across the table from me and raised my eyebrows in question. She’d been annoying the fuck out of me all morning. I don’t know why she had to be in so many of my god damned classes.
“Are you guys playing this weekend? I’d love to come and see you.”
I bit back a rude reply and nodded. “Yep. Friday night. At the GV.”
“Awesome. Maybe we can catch up after.” She narrowed her eyes and lowered her head. I guessed it was supposed to be a seductive look or something. It wasn’t.
Turning back to Mia, I pressed my lips into a weary smile. “Have you ever been to one of our shows?”
She shook her head softly. “No. The crowds are a bit too much for me.”
I watched her carefully, trying to pick up on any clue that might give me some answers. “Why do crowds bother you so much?”
I was watching her so intently, I didn’t notice Aiden had turned his attention on our conversation. “They just do, okay?”
My gaze jumped over Mia’s shoulder to find Aiden glaring at me from the other side of Kaeli. That look, combined with the warning tone in his voice, had me instantly confused. I looked back at Mia to see she’d gone a little pale. Holy shit. What did I say? “I’m sorry. I didn’t…”
She smiled sadly and shook her head. “Don’t worry about it. It’s fine.”
I glanced over at Aiden again, hoping he could shed a bit of fucking light, but he’d resumed his interest in the swarming girls like nothing had happened. The fuck? Unease grew in my stomach. I had a feeling this wasn’t just some silly little phobia that could be fixed with a bit of gentle encouragement. This was big.
Kaeli whispered something in Mia’s ear and she shook her head, whispering something in return. Her whole body language had changed. I could feel the tension rolling off her in waves. I wanted to fix it, but what the fuck could I do with everyone watching? I didn’t think I’d been more frustrated in my life.
“Hey, man,” Matt said from further down the table. “How many tickets did Lenny give us?”
What the fuck did I care how many tickets he gave us? I shrugged. “I don’t know. Six?”
“You mind if I take a couple?”
Jesus, he could take them all if he’d fucking stop talking to me. “Nah, man. Take as many as you want.”
“You’re not bringing anyone?” He sounded surprised.
Mia pushed to her feet beside me and I looked up with alarm. Shit, was she shitty with me? “Are you okay?” I asked so only she could hear.
She smiled but it didn’t reach her eyes. “Yeah, I’ve just had enough for today.”
I watched her climb over the seat to join Kaeli. Yeah, I fucking sucked at this.
“Jace?”
Matt’s voice interrupted my thoughts before they could turn into a spiraling destruction. “What?” I couldn’t help the clipped tone that came out.
“You don’t want any of the tickets?”
“I fucking said I didn’t, didn’t I?”
Matt gave me an amused look, but had the smarts not to say anything. I turned my attention back to my lunch and did my best to blend in as much as I could until the bell rang. It was a fucking nightmare.
Chapter 27
Mia
Are you okay?
I’d read those words over and over again since Jace had sent them to me after lunch. I knew the ‘I’m fine’ text I’d sent back probably didn’t reassure him at all, but him asking me point blank at school about my anxiety had been a shock. I hadn’t been prepared for it, and I had no idea how to handle it.
It wasn’t that I didn’t want to share it with him. I did. It was just that I’d never really shared my story with anyone before. Not even Mom or Aiden. Sure, they knew what the police had told them, but no one could get me to talk back then, and I guess as the years passed by, they just learned to leave it be for fear of upsetting me.
When I became friends with Kaeli, I just pulled up the news article on it on the internet and let her find out that way. It was just easier for me.
I didn’t want to do that with Jace though. He deserved more than that. There were two telltale signs that told me he was worth the full unedited story. One was the fact that he didn’t tiptoe around me like I’d break, sending me a, ‘You didn’t look fine…’, text, calling me on my bullshit, and the other was the fact that he seemed to know when enough was enough, and after not hearing back from me, knew well enough to leave it alone.
As I sat in my room that night, I considered calling him, but I still had no idea how to tell him. The thought made me as nervous as hell. I knew it was a huge road block for me, and if Jace and I had any chance at all of making it as a couple, I needed to share my past with him and overcome all the things that stood in our way.
The buzzing sound of an incoming text message drew my attention to my phone lying on the bed in front of me. The instant I saw Jace’s name, my heart started racing, but not in the usual excited way. This was more like a slight panic. I opened it up to read the message with my heart in my throat.
Can I ring you?
Shit.
I threw the phone on the bed and stood u
p, pacing the floor. He was going to want answers. God, I would. But was I ready to talk? That was the million dollar question. I groaned and picked up my phone, typing quickly and hitting send before I could stop myself.
OK
Oh crap. The phone rang almost immediately. Taking a deep breath, I answered. “Hi.”
“Hey, how are you? I was worried about you after lunch today.”
I sighed. “I was fine. Aiden was just overreacting, that’s all.”
The line was silent for a couple of heartbeats before he spoke up, and when he did, his voice was low and cautious. “It wasn’t Aiden’s reaction I was worried about, Mia.”
My heart was going crazy. I was going to do it. I knew now. “Do you really want to know?”
“Of course I do. You’re my girlfriend, Mia. I care about you.”
In that moment, I knew he really did. I could hear it in his voice, and funnily enough, it made the nerves in me settle. “Has Aiden ever told you about how our dad died?”
I could almost hear the confusion in his silence. “Uh…only that he got caught in a riot or something, right?”
I held my breath for a while, willing the words to come. Something about the warmth in his voice made me want to give them up though. “Yeah.” I swallowed. “Well…I was there.”
They say a picture is worth a thousand words, but I was positive in that moment I could say the same for Jace’s silence. I could almost see the concern on his face, and it gave me strength to push onwards.
“Aiden and I were four. We were supposed to be at kindy together, but he was sick that day, so it was just me. When the centre rang and said they were evacuating because of the riots, Dad came to get me...”
I paused to take a few steadying breaths. I was trying to keep the quiver from my voice, but there was just no stopping it.
“We’d almost made it out of the district. We only had one more block to go, but someone had set a car on fire and it’d exploded, blocking our way out. Dad grabbed me out of the car and decided to carry me to safety. There were so many people. I remember thinking they all sounded so angry. Dad kept telling me we were nearly there, to not worry. That it was going to be alright…”