Wild Ride

by Jennifer Cruisie

  When they were all inside, he said, “Okay, let me start. Weaver, my mother and late part of the Guardia, a hereditary anti-demon peacekeeping force with supernatural powers stationed here in Dreamland to watch over five super-demons called the Untouchables.”

  “Ethan!” Glenda said, outraged.

  “Supernatural powers?” Weaver said, sounding skeptical.

  “Mom, Weaver is part of an elite secret government demon-research group investigating Dreamland because of its high demon population.”

  “So much for 'secret,” Weaver said.

  “Elite?” Glenda said, looking Weaver up and down.

  He looked from one to the other. “Play nice.”

  Glenda's chin went up and she pressed her lips firmly together, so Weaver said, “Fine. I'll go first. The government is interested in demons the same way it's interested in any force, as a possible threat and a possible weapon. My partner feels strongly that using demons as weapons is a bad idea because he thinks exploiting living things for government ends is wrong, and I think using them is a bad idea because they're evil little suckers and they'll turn on us in a heartbeat.”

  “She's also blown a hell of a lot of them away for us,” Ethan said, hoping that would soften Glenda.

  Glenda didn't say anything, so Weaver moved on. “My boss, however, is torn. She doesn't really believe in demons, thinks they're like UFOs and my partner and I are crazy, but if they turn out to be real, then finding a way to use them could considerably up her status in the Defense Department.”

  “Particularly after the demons kill everybody above her,” Glenda said, taking out a cigarette, which Ethan saw as a good sign.

  Weaver nodded. “The problem is, she's becoming more convinced they're real with every report we turn in. And she's talking about coming here herself, and if she decides that the demons are real and of use to her, she'll try to commandeer the park for the government.”

  “Over my dead body,” Glenda said. “She has no idea what she's messing with.”

  “I agree,” Weaver said. “Especially since I have no idea what we're messing with. Which is why I need information.” She sat back, waiting politely.

  “She saved my life, Mom,” Ethan said. “More than once. Talk to her.”

  “So there are minion demons in the park,” Glenda said. "How are they getting in?''

  “Ray Brannigan is bringing them in,” Weaver said.

  'Why?“ Glenda said, looking taken aback for the first time. ”He wants run the park, not destroy it. I know he wants us all out of here, but he doesn't want the park wrecked."

  “He's bringing them in to kill us, Mom,” Ethan said. "They killed I )clpha, they tried to kill Gus earlier this week, and they tried to kill Weaver and me today.

  Glenda jerked her head up. "What good does it do Ray to have you (O dead? I can see him going after Mab, he'll inherit her ten percent, but it's not like he's going to get any richer killing you and Weaver. He's all about money, he'd sell his soul for Her voice broke off.

  “Sell his soul for ...,” Ethan prompted.

  Glenda sat back. “My god. It was right there and I never saw it.”

  “What?” Ethan asked.

  “He made a deal with Kharos to take over the park.”

  “Who is Kharos?” Weaver said.

  “The devil,” Glenda said. “Ray's traded his soul for money and power. He made the deal forty years ago, why didn't I see it?”

  “I don't see how you could have seen it,” Ethan said, not following. “I don't see how you see it now.”

  “Wait a minute,” Weaver said, straightening in her chair. “The Devil?”

  Glenda ignored her to talk to Ethan. “Forty years ago, Ray Brannigan was a skinny, stupid teenager. Sometime after the weekend that the Untouchables escaped, he began to change. He filled our, got smarter, hell, his hair got thicker, almost overnight. Everything came his way. West Point, the Army Rangers, great investments, mayor Glenda tapped her cigarette, upset now. ”And I didn't pay any attention back then because your Father had just died and you were on the way and... Oh, god, Erhan, he's been planning on handing the park to Kharos for forty years."

  “Why wait so long?” Ethan said.

  “I don't know, go ask Ray.” Glenda stubbed out her unlit cigarette. “This is bad. Ray has access everywhere. He -”

  “Okay, about the Devil,” Weaver said, her self-possession gone. “The real Devil? He exists?”

  “A devil,” Glenda said. “A big one. And yes, he's real, the son of a hitch.”“ She shivered a little bit as if someone had walked over her grave. Or was digging it. ”Kharos wants out, he wants all the Untouchables out, and once they're all free, they'll take their real forms, they'll he so powerful that we can't -"

  “We need Weaver with us on this, Mom,” Ethan said, cutting her off as her voice began to rise in panic.

  Glenda swallowed. “All right.“ She nodded at Weaver. ”All right, you can help. But you do not interfere with the capture of an Untouchable. You can do whatever you want with the minions, but you have to leave the Untouchables to us."

  “And this devil is one of the Untouchables?” Weaver asked.

  “Yes,” Glenda said. “There are five: the devil, his wife, his right-hand man, a sex-crazed mermaid, and a trickster.”

  Weaver nodded, a little wide-eyed. “Okay, then.”

  “And you have to keep the government out of this,” Glenda said.

  “I'll keep Ursula out of it,” Weaver said. “My partner needs to know. And then we'll decide together what we report. He's against killing, but I think even he would have to admit the Devil needs to be put down. We still have a mission to complete, we can't stop our work, but we can help you fight evil.”

  “I have a mission, too,” Glenda said. “And I'll cut you off at the knees if you get in the way of my duty.”

  “That's fair,” Weaver said. “Especially if we're dealing with, you know, the Devil.” She shook her head, a little pale.

  Glenda looked at her, puzzled, and Ethan said, “Her dad was a preacher. Now our first problem. We got attacked by pirates -”

  “Pirates?” Glenda said, lost.

  “From the Pirate Ship,” Ethan said. “They were possessed. We destroyed them all, but I'm pretty sure there'll be more attacks because I think Kharos is trying to kill us all. So -”

  “You destroyed them?” Glenda said. “But then we have no Pirate Ship ride.”

  Ethan looked at her, dumbfounded. “They were trying to kill us.”

  “I know, but now we're down a ride,” Glenda said. “That's going to hurt the park receipts.”

  “So would a dozen minion-possessed pirates,” Weaver pointed out.

  “Right, right,” Glenda said, frowning. “Okay, forget the pirates, we'll just have to close the ride. Now we have to get Tura back in her chalice.”

  “Tura?” Weaver said, trying to follow.

  “The sex-crazed mermaid, kills cheaters,” Ethan said.

  Glenda nodded. “Then get Fufluns' chalice repaired and get him back.”

  “Chalice?” Weaver said.

  “Ancient wood cup that traps Untouchables,” Ethan said. “Fufluns is the trickster.”

  “Okay,” Weaver said.

  Glenda went on. “And stop Ray, whatever he's doing, but don't let him know we know he's in league with Kharos. Once Kharos knows we're on to Ray, he'll get another flunky and we won't know who he is.” She thought over what she'd just said and then nodded. “Those are the big fixes. After that, we can mop up the minion demons.” She stood up. “I'll go warn Gus that the minions are after him; he's probably at the Dragon. You warn Mab. She's in Delpha's tent telling fortunes, so she's probably okay for the moment, but let her know.”

  Ethan nodded. “So I say, “Mab, your uncle's made a deal with a devil, and he's trying to kill you'?”

  “Yes.”

  “Mab is Ray's niece?” Weaver said. “Can we trust her?”

  “Yes,” Ethan said. “S
he's Guardia, so she can't hurt us. Guardia can't harm other Guardia.”

  “Can't harm them,” Weaver said. “Is that just physically, or does that mean she can't betray you, either?”

  “Mab wouldn't,” Glenda said firmly. “Delpha trusted her. Delpha never made mistakes.”

  “So we go warn Mab.” Weaver stood up. “Thank you very much for accepting me, Mrs. Wayne.”

  She held out her hand, and Glenda looked at it for a moment, and then she took it.

  “Stop Ray,” she said, and they left the trailer to go warn Mab.

  “I say we just shoot him,” Weaver said. “Evil bastard, trying to unleash the Devil on earth.”

  “You heard Mom. Ray's the devil we know. We go after the demons first. Which reminds me. Can I have a D-gun now?”

  “Maybe,” Weaver said.

  Well, the good news was that his mother and Weaver were now talking, Ethan thought as he followed her.

  Then he stopped.

  That was good news depending on what they talked about.

  “You didn't like my mother that much, right?” he said, and followed Weaver down the path to the midway.

  Four hours after her first customer, Mab's skills were sharpening enough that she was getting pictures and words, as if somebody were whispering in her head, along with all the emotions her clients were feeling. And they were all seething with emotion, usually about relationships. At first she thought she'd just gotten a lot of excitable people, but as the day wore on, she realized it was part of being human, emotions zinging around inside you like pinballs even if you thought you were calm. And going to a psychic didn't calm people down any; a lot of them were thinking Don't think that, hoping she wouldn't pick up on their loudest needs.

  It was exhausting.

  “I don't know how you stood this,” she said to the urn, and then the next customer came in, a guy who had his tie on in the middle of an amusement park. “I have a business question,” he said, sitting down.

  “No kidding,” Mab said. “Ten bucks.”

  “That's a lot of money.”

  “You can take it back if you don't think what I say is true,” Mab said, and watched a greedy light appear in his eyes.

  In the rafters above, Frankie cawed and spread his wings.

  “That's fair enough,” he said, and put two fives on the table. “What can you tell me about my business dealings?”

  “I can tell you that you're planning on telling me that you don't believe me even if you do so that you can take your ten bucks back.”

  The guy pulled back a little. “Your psychic abilities tell you that?” he said, a sneer in his voice.

  “No, my vast experience with human nature tells me that.” Mab reached out. “Give me your hand.”

  He gave her his right hand, and she said, “Other one,” so he switched hands.

  She pressed her palm to his and saw... nothing. A great yawning void. “Huh, you may be getting that ten back legitimately. Let me try the other one after all.”

  The guy rolled his eyes and gave her his right hand, and this time when she pressed her palm to his, feelings rolled over her, seething needs, slithering little intents, and oppressive greed, and then a vision of him shaking hands with three other men You're cheating your business partners.“ She looked up at him. ”Wouldn't you think people would be smarter about that stuff now?"

  “You don't know that,” the guy said, trying to take his hand back.

  Mab held on. “No, but you know it and that's what I hear, what you know. What was your question?”

  The man stopped struggling. “I just want to know if my business dealings will be successful.”

  “The future,” Mab said. “Well, the future is iffy. Lots of choices to be made. But if things continue the way they are now . . .” She got a flash of him in a Mercedes, confident and proud. “. . . You'll be driving a Mercedes.”

  The man relaxed. “Well, that's good to know, not that! believe in this stuff.”

  The self-satisfaction rolled off him, no guilt at all, and Mab said, “Of course, that's in this lifetime.”

  “What?”

  “After you die, you're going to hell for being a dishonest bastard, and you'll burn for eternity.”

  The guy snatched his hand back. “I don't believe in hell.”

  “Most people don't until they get there.” Mab smiled at him. “Of course, if you stop lying and cheating, you can probably redeem yourself. If not, have them put marshmallows in your coffin. There's a bright side to everything, I always say.”

  “That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard,” the man said, and turned to go. Then he turned back and reached for the two fives on the table.

  “You really don't believe a word I've said?” Mab said, looking at him with cool eyes. “Remember where lying's going to get you, Snowball.”

  The man really wanted to pick up those two fives, Mab could tell he wanted to, but he pulled his hand back and walked out.

  “I made up the part about hell,” Mab said to Frankie after the guy had closed the sliding doors. “But I'm pretty sure I was right anyway.”

  The doors slid open, and Ray came in carrying a Styrofoam cup with a lid on it, a cigar chomped between his teeth. Frankie cawed again.

  “Speak of the devil,” Mab said, taken aback. “You want your fortune read?”

  “No.” He smiled down at her. “So, I don't suppose you've changed your mind about selling?”

  “No.” Mab squinted at him. “Are you losing your hair?”

  “No,” Ray said, sounding surly. “The light in here is bad. Did you sign that will yet?”

  “Ray, I'm not accepting Delpha's legacy, so I have nothing to leave anybody. There's no point in my making a will.”

  He nodded as if he wasn't surprised, and then glanced at his hand and seemed to remember he was holding a cup. “Almost forgot. Cindy sent you some tea,”

  “Thank you,” Mab said, taking the cup. She cracked the lid and sniffed it. Odd. She made a face.

  “It's some kind of herbal gunk,” Ray said around his cigar. “She said it was full of vitamins, keep you from getting sick out here in the cold.”

  “Okay.” Mab put the lid back on the cup and set it to one side. “Sit down, I'll read your palm. Tell you how your business is going to do.”

  “Very funny. Drink your tea.”

  “No, trust me, it turns out I really can do this.” Mab held out her hand. “Give me your hand, I'll tell your future.”

  “No.” He hesitated, and then he took the cigar out of his mouth and added, “You're a good girl, Mab,” and walked out.

  “What are you talking about?” Mab called after him, and then a woman came through the open doors, a ten-dollar bill in her hand, leaving the sliding doors open behind her.

  “I want to know about my boyfriend,” she said as she sat down.

  “Imagine my surprise,” Mab said, and pulled the cup of tea in front of her. “Sit down and -”

  Ethan knocked on the side of the tent and came in, and Frankie gave a caw from his roost in the rafters, startling the woman, who hadn't noticed him.

  “I'm kind of in the middle of something here,” Mab said.

  “We need to talk to you,” he said as Weaver followed him in.

  “Oh,” Mab said. “Hi, Weaver.”

  Weaver folded her arms. “Army Barbie?”

  Mab returned the smile. “I'm sure you've thought of worse for me. Now as you see, this lovely woman would like her fortune told -”

  Ethan nodded at the woman. “Park security, ma'am. If you could give us a minute.”

  The woman looked at Mab. “It's drugs, isn't it?”

  “No, she just acts like she's on drugs,” Ethan said, and the woman got up and left, not happy.

  “Good thing I don't make my living doing this,” Mab said, reaching or her tea. “I'd be annoyed.”

  Frankie swooped down low across the table and grabbed at the cup with his claws, spilling hot liquid everywh
ere.

  “Frankie!” Mab said, yanking her shawl away from the spill. “Damn.”

  “Where'd you get the tea?” Ethan said.

  "Ray brought it .. .” Mab's voice trailed off at the look on his face.

  “Your uncle's trying to kill you,” Ethan said. “Did he bring you anything else? What's in the jug?”