TooDangeroustoLove

by AliyahBurke

  “No, you know you are welcome to stay,” her friend said.

  “I have to get back to my home. Besides, if y’all don’t need my help I am certainly not going to get in the way.”

  “You’re not in the way, you’re family,” Gavin said as he walked into the room, kissing his wife on the cheek.

  “But even family gets in the way. I should leave,” Serenity said.

  “Not tonight. This is the first night we are going out on the town and I want you to come with,” Sanura protested. “There is that whole street party.”

  “All right. I will leave tomorrow. I have already been here a week. I need to get home.”

  “We’ll see,” Sanura quipped.

  They arrived and found the place was jumping with people. Gavin was pushing the stroller, and the women were hanging back a little talking amongst themselves.

  “So, who is he?” Sanura asked.

  “Who’s who?” Serenity responded.

  “The man you are runnin’ from. Don’t forget, I know the signs.”

  “I’m not runnin’,” Serenity vowed.

  “Right. How’s therapy going? You doing better?” Her friend knew enough to change the subject.

  “Really good. Every now and then it hurts but for the most part it is just fine.”

  “Glad to hear that,” a deep voice broke into their conversation. “I am claiming a dance with you.” It belonged to a man that worked in Gavin’s firm, his name was Ronald. He was a very sweet and handsome man.

  “Ron,” Serenity squealed. “It is so good to see you.”

  “Well, come give me a hug then, girl.”

  With a huge smile, she jumped into his embrace. “You are looking good.”

  “You too, little girl. You too.” He placed a platonic kiss on her cheek.

  Chapter Twenty-Three

  The evening passed on and Serenity let herself go, dancing with many people. Ate way too much, didn’t drink anything alcoholic, however. Lesson learned there. As they were talking she was next to Ronald, who had his arm around her so she couldn’t run from the questions, when another voice intruded into the reunion.

  “I’ll thank you to let go of my wife.” The voice set Serenity’s insides to quivering like there was an eight-point-eight earthquake going on inside of her body. The voice spoke with cool authority.

  Her groan must have been audible, for the whole group had fallen silent at that announcement. Gavin spoke up, “Who are you?”

  “Serenity’s husband. Brandt. Brandt Fowler.”

  Six pairs of eyes turned to look at Serenity, who seemed lost as she stared at the newcomer to the group. His eyes found and hung onto hers like a lifeline. “Serenity?” His deep voice teased her; it was velvet, the same every time it touched her. He reached out his hand and found his disposition softening as she moved effortlessly towards him.

  Without missing a beat, Brandt pulled her in close to his chest as soon as he touched her hand and then kissed her. It was a kiss that left no doubt to anyone who was watching whose woman she was. Right there in the middle of the festival he branded his woman.

  Serenity felt her arms rising up to encircle his neck and she barely registered that her feet had left the ground. They wrapped themselves around Brandt’s lean waist. Her fingers had delved into his black hair as their mouths devoured each other.

  Whistles, catcalls, and hollering finally broke into their haze. Serenity drew back just enough so their noses were still touching. “What are you doing here, Brandt?” she asked in a husky voice.

  “I came to get my wife. Do you realize that I have never woken up in bed next to you? Ever. I believe, wife, that is something we need to discuss.” He kissed her gently before adding, “Perhaps you should unhook your legs from around my waist now.” Brandt smiled at her blush but allowed her to slide down his body and feel just how much he wanted her.

  Serenity’s eyes never left his. “I thought you were kidding about the marriage thing. We aren’t really married, are we?”

  “Till death do us part, sweetling. We have been married for a week now.”

  Gavin stepped forward with his hand stretched out. “I’m Gavin, Gavin Rawlins.” Introductions to the rest of the group soon followed, but Brandt never let go of his wife. She was far too precious of an item to do that.

  * * * *

  Brandt stayed next to her for the rest of the evening. All through the laser show and fireworks, he was beside her. When the show was over, he began walking with her but when she veered off to go with the Rawlins’ he put his foot down.

  “Where do you think you’re going?” he demanded.

  “To bed,” she said.

  “My car is this way,” he stated.

  “Goodnight then.” Serenity smiled at him from under the lighted parking area.

  Brandt stood there as she turned and began to walk away from him. He was shocked; didn’t she hear him say they were married? “You’re coming with me.” He spoke softly but his words were lined with steel.

  “I’m sorry, what did you say?”

  “You are my wife, you are coming with me.” He began to pursue her, his every motion pure Alpha male.

  “My things are at their house.”

  “Get them tomorrow. Besides, you won’t need any clothes tonight.” He nodded at the other two. “It was a pleasure to meet you. If you will excuse us.” Brandt walked away, almost dragging Serenity behind him. At his rental car, he opened the passenger door and blocked her way so all she could do was get in.

  As he shut his door behind him, he speared her with a glance full of disbelief.

  “What?” she asked.

  “I don’t believe you left me there.” He turned the BMW over and drove towards his hotel.

  “Excuse me, but I said I was coming up to Georgia to see them and their baby.”

  “True. You did. But you know that I didn’t remember that.”

  “Not my fault. I’m not in charge of what you can and can’t recall. I’m having enough issue of my own trying to figure out how the hell I married you but have no recollection of it. At all.”

  “So when you asked me to let you tell your parents—who know, by the way, about our marriage that you went into willingly, I swear it wasn’t coercion on my end—you had no intention of being there when I came back later, did you?”

  “No.” Her answer was so fast and so direct it drove a dagger right into Brandt’s heart. He pulled off into a shopping center and turned the car around.

  “Okay, Serenity. You win. You win. I will take you back to your friend’s house, so tell me how to get there.”

  Serenity gave him directions, and as he drove the car was silent. As Brandt pulled up in front of the large home he put the car in park and faced her in the dim interior. His hand reached for her, stopping her escape from his overwhelming presence. “Hang on a second, there is something I have to say this first.”

  Serenity nodded and so he began.

  “Our marriage is real. I never believed that I would learn how to love someone like I did you. Both sides of you, Raven and Serenity. You are a woman that I would be proud to have next to me. I long for the day that I can wake up next to your body. I know you thought that it was a joke when I said we were married. It’s real, and if you want to divorce me I won’t fight you on it.

  “I realized that I can’t make you feel the same way, and it just seems that you want to get as far away from me as possible, so I am going to have to let you go. I don’t want to, lord knows I don’t. But, if it takes me out of your life for you to be happy, then that is what it will be. That’s all I want for you is to be happy. I love you, Serenity, and I will always love you, but I can’t keep chasing you and trying to get you to feel something you must not feel. I can’t fight these ghosts you have within you unless you let me know them.” Brandt got out of the car and walked around to the passenger side to open her door and assist her out.

  “I told you I would do anything within my power to make you
happy. So I will leave you alone.” With a sad smile, he reached down and brushed a kiss on her full lips and whispered, “I love you, Serenity Fowler, I love you. I hope you find what you are looking for.” With one more kiss, he stepped back and walked to the driver side, slid in, and drove off without looking back.

  * * * *

  Serenity stood there with her fingers touching her lips that ached for his as she watched the taillights of his car disappear into the Georgia night. Tears ran unnoticed down her cheeks. How long she stood there, Serenity had no idea. The last thing she remembered was Brandt’s final kiss.

  When she woke the next day, it was late in the afternoon. The house was quiet but she knew that her friend was home. Serenity hurt, every part of her felt like it had been broken. And it was all her fault.

  A knock sounded at her door. “Come in, Sanura.” Her voice sounded emotionless, dead.

  She did. “Come on, honey. Let’s get you packed.”

  “Where am I going?” Serenity sounded wooden.

  “Home to Alaska. I’m sending you on our jet. That way you can find the strength to go back and get that man of yours.”

  “He left me,” Serenity swore.

  “No!” Sanura was firm. “You pushed him away. We both know you love him so find your strength and then go get him. Be happy, you deserve it.”

  Home. Somehow, the thought didn’t fill her with the same joy. “You’re right.”

  “Of course I am. Now come on. You can leave within the hour. I already called your father so he knows you are coming.”

  A very unresponsive Serenity boarded the Rawlins private jet and headed home to Alaska. Ten hours later she was still very lethargic as Seth drove her to her home and put her to bed.

  For the next week, she just laid around and felt sorry for herself. Then, one cold morning, she decided that she had brought it upon herself and it was up to her to change it. If she so desired to do so.

  She took her dogs out and opened her garage. With a smile, she looked at her truck. It was time to get to work. Serenity called her father and headed into town with the dogs. While she was placing an order for decals for her vehicle her cell rang.

  “Hello?”

  “Can you bring us some more canned puppy food? We just had a litter and need some more.” Violet made the request.

  “Sure, I will just toss it on top of the bags I already have for you.”

  “Thanks, hon. See you in a few.”

  As she walked back to her truck a shiver came over her body. With a quick look, she noticed a guy in the back of a taxi that looked an awful lot like Brandt. Instead of looking again she just shook her head. If she wasn’t careful she would go crazy seeing him in everything she looked at.

  * * * *

  Kentucky, two months later

  Brandt had thrown himself back into his work. His heart still hurt but part of him held out hope since he never got divorce papers in the mail. He had just about gone over to her and begged her to come with him when he saw her in Alaska while he was picking up Hella, but he hadn’t. Did she ever think of him? Did she even miss him?

  He had taken the day to work outside with the men. A bit of excess energy needed to be worked off. As he was on the roof of the building, shingling, he heard the high-speed rev of a motorcycle. Motorcycles weren’t uncommon but this far back in the subdivision they were, since it was all new construction and no one had moved in yet.

  It wasn’t common for someone to be on a bike in March, still pretty cold. So he, along with everyone else, wondered what it could be that caused that person to be driving so fast, well over the posted speed limit.

  A lone person on a gunmetal and smoke colored bike pulled up and revved the engine before turning it off. Brandt looked down and hadn’t a clue as to who it was. They wore camouflage fatigues and a black leather jacket. On their head was a malachite helmet with the visor down, obscuring their view of the visitor.

  Brandt’s foreman walked up to the person and spoke to them. As he watched, his foreman nodded and pointed up to the roof where he was at. A black gloved hand shook the foreman’s as his man turned and headed to the ladder that led to his roof.

  “Boss, someone here to see you. Says it’s important.” Chad, the foreman, yelled up to him.

  Brandt made his way to the ladder and began to climb down. Perhaps something had happened to his father. His cell phone was in his vehicle and his father had been feeling poorly. He rolled his shoulders to get the kinks out and walked towards the bike and the mysterious messenger.

  * * * *

  Serenity sat on her bike and watched her husband approach. He looked so good. Even though it was still cool, he was not wearing a jacket and she could see a sheen of sweat on his brow. His black shirt was torn on the shoulder and his jeans seemed to hang just a little looser than she remembered. On his feet were his favorite pair of work boots—she recognized them from when she had gone to work with him.

  It had taken her these two months to come to terms with herself and who she had become. To realize that having a man care for you wasn’t such a bad thing. That it didn’t make you weak. It was still hard for her to not let Raven totally take over in some situations, but she was working on it. For the most part, she just had the good from Raven.

  Serenity had realized that she missed Brandt, husband or not. And she knew he deserved to know it. It wasn’t right that he had done all the chasing and she all the pushing away, she needed to let him know how she felt. Even if he had moved on, she still wanted him to know her position.

  But as she sat on her bike her heart climbed up into her throat. What if he spurned her like she had done him? What if he just walked away? What if? What if? What if? With a mental shake, she just enjoyed his masculine stride and the view he offered. It was like the man just dripped virility.

  “Can I help you?” His authoritative voice reached her ears and sounded like heaven.

  Silently she held up one gloved hand to stop his progress. When he stopped, his head cocked to the side like it did when he was really concentrating. No time like the present. She reached up and removed the protective helmet. Looking at his face through strands of wayward hair, Serenity said, “Hello, Brandt.”

  Brandt didn’t say a word.

  Serenity shoved her hair back from her face, then set the helmet on the gas tank in front of her.

  “I know you probably don’t want to see me or talk to me. Not that I blame you,” she rushed on to say, “especially after the way I treated you the last time we were together. But I just need you to hear me out.” Her gloved fingers traced the diamond pattern on the back of her helmet.

  “I did a lot of thinking since I spoke to you last.” She took a fortifying breath. “I can’t apologize enough about the rude and disrespectful way that I treated you. For that I am so sorry. But you were right…I was only good at one thing, pushing you away.” She took in the way the rest of work crew had gathered around to listen in. “If I could go back and change it, I would. I wouldn’t have left the room, the bed and most definitely I wouldn’t have left you.”

  The men were staring between the two of them and yet there was no change of expression on Brandt’s face.

  “Not that it makes a difference now, but I am learning to live with what I have done in the past. I still have nightmares, but I have found just about all I need to be happy. All that’s missing,” Serenity paused and took another look at his deadpan face, “all that’s missing is you and the love you once had for me.”

  She swung one leg over the bike and walked over towards him. Just the smell of his body made her mouth go dry. “I know I have no right to come into your life like this, but I needed to let you know. If you ever decide to forgive and want to talk, here is my card. Home number is on the back.” When he made no move to take it she just slid it in the pocket of his tee shirt and tried not to picture all the pectorals that were under the flimsy fabric. Serenity swallowed hard as she pulled off one glove to touch his face with her ba
re hand.

  Tears formed behind her eyes as she cupped his jaw and skimmed her thumb over his bottom lip. “I love you, Brandt Fowler. I always have and I always will.” With a small yet sad smile, she took her hand away, kissed her fingertips, and touched them lightly to his lips. “Goodbye.”

  She turned around, blinking back the tears, and pulled her glove on. Straddling her bike, she looked over at the six-foot-four and a half man. He still stood in the same place with the same expression on his face. None. With a small nod of acceptance, she put her helmet on and brought her bike to life.

  * * * *

  The last the group saw of her was the silver bike racing up the road and disappearing around a corner. Brandt didn’t move until the bike couldn’t even be heard anymore, and then it was only when his foreman shook his shoulder asking him if he was alright.

  It took Brandt a moment to recover. When he did and saw all his men looking at him like he was a complete moron, he realized that he hadn’t said anything to her the whole time she had been there. The shock of seeing her again had just been too much.

  “Man, you are crazy. Letting a woman like that ride away. Give me her card and I will look her up,” one of the workers said. A few more jumped in on the ribbing until a deadly voice broke into the mix.

  “Be very careful how you talk about my wife, guys.” Brandt had pulled the card out of his pocket and was looking at it, so he missed the shocked looks on all their faces.

  “Wife?” his foreman asked.

  “Yes, my wife. And since I just stood here like an ass, I think I am going to go home, find her, and apologize. I will see y’all later.” Brandt headed for his car without another word, totally ignorant of the looks of disbelief and amazement on their faces.

  * * * *

  Alaska, two days later

  The charcoal truck sat parked in the garage, and as he shut the door he realized it had been her he had seen up here. Irk was beside him, along with Hella, as he walked towards the large octagonal house through the snow. The beauty of this place took his breath away, so did the cold. He went into the warm house and poured himself another cup of coffee and walked back out to the porch. His father-in-law said she should be back soon, that she was out running a friend’s dogs. Seth had let him in and told him to make himself at home.