Wild and Willing!

by Lawrence, Kim

The bleak expression that passed over his features made Anna’s tender heart tighten in her chest. ‘They have you.’

  Adam shot her a startled look. ‘I’m hardly parent material.’

  ‘I’ve already told you once, you have potential. Have you forgotten?’

  ‘I probably haven’t forgotten anything you’ve said to me.’

  She reacted to this unexpected admission with a rush of words. ‘No one’s born a parent; it’s something people learn as they go along. Mum and Dad had given up hope of ever having children when we came along and they coped with the three of us. You’re bound to make mistakes. I just don’t think you should be so hard on yourself,’ she finished lamely.

  What had he been trying to say? Why had he remembered everything she’d said? Could it be the impact she’d made on him wasn’t as superficial as she’d imagined? Get real, Anna, she told herself brutally. The only thing he wants from you is your body! Sometimes being brutal was the only thing that stopped her making a total fool of herself.

  ‘You’re the last person in the world I’d expect such a glowing character reference from,’ he said, looking at her with an odd expression.

  Her eyes slid away from the intent stare. She was very conscious that she’d sounded overly fervent. She shrugged. ‘Being a parent is a job for amateurs. Your problem is you’re too much of a perfectionist.’

  ‘Wouldn’t you be daunted by the prospect?’ His words brought her head up with a snap.

  ‘It’s not something I’ve given a lot of thought to,’ she admitted.

  ‘I don’t suppose you give anything much thought.’ The corners of his mouth turned down with disapproval. ‘Take that farrago this afternoon.’

  ‘I’ll have you know a great deal of thought went into that farrago,’ she retorted huffily. ‘Organised chaos requires very careful timing, and a bit of prayer doesn’t go amiss,’ she added with the faintest twinkle in her eyes. ‘I’m very pleased with the way things went. Except for this bit.’ Her gaze shifted to her bandaged leg.

  ‘You mean that wasn’t deliberate too?’ he mocked. ‘Plucky crusader risking her life to rescue elderly protester from the jaws of death?’ he suggested. ‘That media circus must have loved it.’

  ‘You really do think I’m a complete crackpot, don’t you?’ Her voice rose to an indignant pitch. ‘As if I’d pull that sort of stunt! When you’re fighting against the odds you have to do things that capture the imagination just to get your case heard. I wish it was easier to raise public consciousness—’

  ‘Save the lectures.’ He leant forward and placed a finger lightly against her parted lips. ‘What happened to your sense of humour? I was teasing.’

  Achingly conscious of the impression his finger had left against her mouth, she regarded him suspiciously. ‘My sense of humour is fine, thank you. It’s the fact that you have one that leaves me speechless.’

  ‘Ouch!’ He winced. ‘I take it that that show back there was your baby?’

  ‘A lot of people are just as committed…’

  He made an impatient gesture. ‘You wrote the script and directed the action?’

  ‘What if I did?’ She suspected her admission would unleash a fresh torrent of criticism.

  ‘I’ve never met anyone with so much stamina—mental and physical,’ he mused. His grudging admiration threw her off balance. ‘You really are a sucker for a lost cause.’

  ‘I like to win occasionally.’ One day she might convince him to stand up and be counted, she thought, forgetting for the moment that she wasn’t going to have anything to do with Adam Deacon ever again.

  ‘Is that what your Simon is? He’s a loser.’

  ‘Simon is not a loser,’ she contradicted him, her eyes flashing angrily at this sly dig. ‘You don’t know him, and he’s not mine.’

  ‘He let me come with you to the hospital, didn’t he?’ Adam reminded her, his expression making it clear he despised the younger man for being so easily out manoeuvred. ‘I know his type,’ he continued with a surprising amount of venom. ‘He relies on his schoolboyish looks and charms and has cultivated the helpless look that has all your maternal instincts screaming to look after him.’

  ‘I don’t feel the least little bit maternal as far as Simon is concerned,’ she informed him with a gentle, sphinx-like smile.

  The heat behind his hostile glare was vaguely shocking but also satisfying. It made her feel less impotent to know she could still hold her own verbally when so much was outside her control.

  ‘So you’ve dropped the “just good friends” story, have you?’

  ‘I’ve known Simon most of my life and I value his friendship. He’s kind, steady and he doesn’t make snap character judgements.’ To her dismay an evil voice in her head added, Boring, and she heard herself adding defensively, ‘Possibly because he’s not an arrogant pig with an over-inflated ego. He…’ The rest of her statement was lost in the warmth of his mouth as he leant across and kissed her full on the lips.

  ‘He’d never dream of doing anything so despicable,’ Adam said huskily as he lifted his head a little from hers.

  It occurred to him that not very long ago he could have claimed the same thing himself. Something about this woman made him override his principles, the precepts he’d conducted his life by. ‘Keeping you at arm’s length is getting beyond my control.’ The admission was bitter.

  Anna’s eyelids felt heavy as she lifted them to look into his face. She could see the fine tracery of lines radiating from the corners of his eyes, appreciate the texture of his lightly tanned skin.

  ‘No, I don’t think Simon would,’ she agreed, a husky catch in her voice. She caught her trembling lower lip between her teeth. ‘My sister’s in love with you.’ I really will have to do something about this communication problem between my mouth and brain, she thought grimly.

  ‘Which one?’ He stroked the curve of her cheek with his thumb.

  ‘Don’t be smart.’ She continued to fight with all her might against the hypnotic pull of his eyes. Now it was out in the open she wasn’t going to let him laugh it off.

  He did laugh in what she considered a heartless manner.

  ‘It’s no joke. I’m surprised you didn’t interview her for the job of wife and mother; she’s a much better catch than Jessica!’

  ‘I’m flattered that you think she’d be interested, but Rosalind and I have a strictly professional relationship. She’s a very single-minded lady and I’d have noticed if there was anything else on the agenda. It would have interfered with our working relationship, and I couldn’t have allowed that.’

  It sounded pretty ruthless to Anna but she didn’t mention this fact. It was hard enough to concentrate on the main theme of their conversation without introducing any sub-plots.

  ‘How can you be so sure?’ Could she have misinterpreted her sister’s distress?

  ‘Did Lindy say she was in love with me?’

  ‘No…but—’

  ‘What did she say?’

  ‘She said she missed you and she’s having trouble adapting to her new boss.’

  ‘How exactly did this translate as an avowal of love?’ he asked scathingly.

  When he put it like that she did see there was a possibility she’d read more into the conversation than had been there. ‘She sounded so…so emotional. Lindy doesn’t get emotional. Well, she does, but she hides it.’

  ‘Unlike you,’ he murmured drily. ‘Listen, Lindy’s great at her job. I’d have had no hesitation in giving her the registrar’s vacancy that’s coming up soon. It takes time to adapt to a new way of doing things, and I’m sure my successor is eager to stamp his own personality on the job. Maybe Lindy is feeling resistant. It’s possible she has looked on me as a sort of role model.’ He gave a self-deprecating shrug. ‘I could have a word with Steven—’

  Anna felt a rush of relief. ‘No, don’t interfere. Lindy’s very independent. Do you really think that’s the problem?’ It had been pretty awful feeling jealous of her own sis
ter and angry on her behalf at the same time. She was ashamed to admit that the jealous part had been the stronger of the conflicting emotions.

  ‘I was pretty strongly influenced myself by someone in my early days. If it hadn’t been for his encouragement I’d have walked away from medicine at a very early stage. Angus Montford was an inspiring teacher and a good friend.’

  ‘Was?’ she said softly. There was a sadness in Adam’s face that cut her deeply. She wanted to believe his explanation. She didn’t want to think of her sister suffering as much as she was, but she didn’t feel Adam could be compared to an elderly mentor.

  ‘Angus died three years ago. Jessica is his stepdaughter,’ he said stiffly.

  A feeling of hopelessness washed over Anna. The stepdaughter of a man Adam considered he owed his career to. He would never leave her for the sake of a passion he regarded as nothing more than temporary insanity. She couldn’t compete, but then she’d always known that so it shouldn’t hurt this much.

  ‘You’ve known her for a long time, then?’

  ‘Actually I’d never met her until the funeral. She was devastated.’

  ‘And you comforted her.’ It made Anna feel sick, imagining the form that comfort had taken. ‘Odd you’d never met her before if she was such a devoted daughter.’

  ‘There’s nothing odd about it,’ he said tersely. His expression made her feel small and mean-minded. ‘It made a difference at the time that there was someone else who had known Angus well and missed him. He was an extraordinarily perceptive man with a great mind.’

  ‘Perhaps I did jump to conclusions. I’m sure Lindy would have more sense than to get involved with someone who’s already spoken for. It’s not a formula for happiness.’

  ‘Very subtle,’ he said admiringly in a tone that made her flush. ‘But there’s no need to be subtle at this stage in our acquaintance, Anna. There’s no perhaps about it—if Lindy has lost her heart, it’s not to me. A man always knows when a woman is in love with him.’

  ‘He does…?’ This was bad news, she thought, closing her eyes. Was he trying to tell her that he knew?

  ‘I know you don’t love your Simon.’

  Anna gave a sigh of relief which was submerged by a flash of anger. ‘You also know you don’t love your Jessica!’ She caught hold of his hand and removed it from the side of her face. If he could be personal so could she!

  ‘Jessica cares enough about me to give up an offer of a job in New York, a job she’s always wanted. When I needed her she was there.’

  ‘And you’re proving how grateful you are by making love to me,’ she choked. She still held his hand pressed between her two smaller palms.

  ‘Don’t you think I’ve told myself that? For pity’s sake, Anna, have you any idea what you did to me when I saw you go under that car?’ He closed his eyes and shuddered as if reliving the incident. ‘I know it’s crazy to feel this way,’ he groaned, cupping her face in his free hand.

  Anna felt choked with emotion. ‘I don’t want the dregs, Adam.’

  ‘You expect me to reject Jessica after all the sacrifices she’s made for me and the children?’

  ‘I expect nothing from you except to be left in peace!’ she told him with quiet dignity.

  Not surprisingly the rest of the journey was completed in stony silence. On their arrival at Anna’s parents’ home, one look at Adam’s profile silenced her protest as he scooped her up into his arms and strode up the path to the farmhouse.

  Her parents greeted her with so much warmth and concern, she felt her eyes weakly fill with tears.

  ‘You wouldn’t believe how many people have been ringing, asking about you. You’re the local heroine,’ her mother said.

  ‘Hopefully that won’t take long to wear off.’

  ‘I’d have thought you’d have lapped up the publicity.’ Adam treated her grimace with a look of disbelief.

  ‘That’s it, put her down there, son,’ her father encouraged Adam, who laid her on the sofa. ‘We’ve just been watching you two on the local news. Well, Anna mostly, although they had managed to dig out your credentials as the doctor who was fortuitously on the scene.’

  ‘Enterprising.’

  Anna could see he wasn’t exactly enthusiastic about his moment of fame. He’ll probably blame me for that too, she thought bleakly.

  ‘You’ve got your moment in the sun too,’ she said. ‘It just so happens I wasn’t seeking to thrust myself into the limelight either, just the issue.’ He couldn’t be more wrong if he imagined she relished her up-front role.

  ‘Sit yourself down; we’re very grateful to you,’ Charlie Lacey said.

  ‘I can’t stay. I’ve got a taxi waiting and my fiancée has had sole charge of my niece and nephews all afternoon. Above and beyond the call of duty.’

  ‘Have you all been staying at the Rectory?’ Beth asked, having satisfied herself that her daughter’s injuries really were as superficial as Adam had told them on the phone.

  ‘A hotel; things are a bit too primitive at the house at the moment.’ He didn’t add that Jessica’s praise of the house had been strained, to put it mildly. ‘The builders are in next week, though there’s not much wrong with the place structurally. The sooner we can move in the better. The children are staying with my mother just now, but she’s not young. It’s only a temporary solution at best.’

  Beth nodded sympathetically, not pretending that the intricacies of his personal situation were unknown to her.

  ‘Well, thank you for putting yourself out on Anna’s account. Simon told us all about it.’ She exchanged a quick, amused look with her husband that left Anna wondering what exactly ‘all’ had been. ‘You’ve only just missed him. We finally persuaded him to go home. I thought it best; Anna hates being fussed. She gets quite…ahem…astringent,’ she said, ignoring her daughter’s squeak of protest. ‘But then perhaps you’ve already noticed that.’

  Adam wisely didn’t comment. ‘Goodnight, Mrs Lacey, Mr Lacey.’ His hand was heartily wrung by her father.

  ‘Thank you, Adam, dear,’ Beth said warmly. She looked pointedly at her daughter, prompting her to remember her manners.

  ‘Thank you,’ Anna managed gruffly. The ‘Adam, dear’ hovered in the air. She badly wanted to know how it would feel on her tongue.

  To her surprise Adam bent down, his hand on the back of the sofa, to brush her forehead with his lips. ‘Don’t make a habit of throwing yourself under the wheels of cars, will you?’ His words initiated a ripple of laughter, but Anna had seen strain, not humour in his eyes as he’d leant close.

  ‘I don’t hold out much hope,’ she heard her father say as the mobile members of the small assembly moved into the hallway. ‘That’s always been Anna’s problem—she never did think before she did anything.’

  I’ve really surpassed myself, Anna thought dismally. I’ve fallen in love this time, and no amount of thinking after the fact is going to alter that!

  CHAPTER SIX

  AFTER two days of hobbling along on crutches Anna was almost screaming with frustration. Never blessed with patience, she liberally inflicted her ill humour on the rest of the household.

  ‘Is it just your leg that’s making you so unpleasant?’ her mother asked after suffering another of her daughter’s outbursts. ‘Or is that just a convenient excuse?’

  ‘What’s that supposed to mean?’ Anna propped her crutches against the dresser and reached up to replace a china plate. She knew she was being impossible. She felt guilty for being such a pain, but no matter how hard she tried she couldn’t snap out of it.

  ‘I mean are you really being so vile because your wings are temporarily clipped, or is there some other reason?’

  Anna hooked the crutches back under her arms and swung herself across the room. ‘I’m sure I’ll regret asking this,’ she said resignedly, ‘but what other reason did you have in mind?’

  ‘Adam Deacon?’ Beth’s eyes were filled with sympathy as her daughter’s face went fiercely hot and then de
eply pale in rapid succession.

  ‘Adam Deacon has nothing whatever to do with me.’ From her mother’s expression Anna could see she might as well have denied her eyes were brown. Her mother hadn’t referred back to the embarrassing incident before and Anna wished she hadn’t now. Pity was the last thing she wanted!

  Beth Lacey gave an unruffled smile and wiped the excess flour from her hands onto her apron. ‘If you say so, my dear. I always thought you were more of a fighter.’

  ‘Fighter! In case you’d forgotten, Mother, Adam is almost a married man.’ Anna’s teeth clenched against the sob of frustration in her throat.

  ‘Almost.’

  ‘Mother!’

  ‘Sometimes fate has rotten timing, child.’

  ‘Is it really that obvious?’ Anna asked huskily, abandoning pretence.

  ‘Not to him perhaps. Have I said something funny?’ she asked as Anna began to shake, her laughter tinged with hysteria.

  ‘Obvious is exactly what Adam thought me when we first met. I haven’t actually given him much reason to revise his opinion.’ Her lips twisted in an ironic smile as she recalled their first meeting.

  Nothing had gone right since she’d met Adam, Anna reflected gloomily. First her direct approach had been misinterpreted and she’d succeeded in alienating him. When he had finally decided to follow his instincts she’d discovered she wanted a lot more than a brief fling. Great timing!

  Adam obviously set a lot of store by his integrity, and it was obvious to Anna he held her responsible for his moral lapse. It seemed Adam Deacon didn’t allow himself to become as human as everyone else. When the sexual attraction he felt for her had dissipated he would probably be grateful that nothing had happened. She could only hope that she would be too.

  That afternoon Simon chauffeured her to the small consulting room she leased in town. She could at least catch up with her paperwork even if she’d been obliged to cancel all her appointments for the week.

  When she’d got what she’d come for she found him curiously examining the small consulting room. She’d built up a small but growing clientele, and her relationship with the local medical practice meant she was frequently sent patients they thought might benefit from treatment.