Sugar Doll's Hurricane Blues

by Lauber, Kalua

  “All right, so you got me but I’m turning in the photographs to the newspaper anyway.” Kevin said defiantly.

  “Go ahead then, I call you on your bluff. I don’t care what the hell you do. It will only make me more popular. The people of Baton Rouge do so love a good scandal.” The mayor played his trump card and hung up confident that he would not suffer the consequences.

  Kevin stood in the phone booth stunned. He looked at his beat up old Ford sitting there. A police car drove slowly by looking at him. He got out of the phone booth and tipped his hat to the officer who returned the gesture and drove off. Kevin got into his car, nervous, disappointed and aggravated with himself. He drove off. He had not anticipated that the mayor was a rascal. He felt foolish and broke. He knew that in this small town he would stick out like a sore thumb. He had only one place he could go for safety’s sake, Beauchamp’s.

  “He’s leaving, yes, should I pursue him?” Officer Dan called the office.

  “Follow him until he gets into Baton Rouge. When he gets on Florida Boulevard, detain him there. Take whatever he has in the car and rough him up a bit, or a lot I don’t care.” The mayor hung up the phone without saying goodbye.

  “Sure thing bro.” Officer Dan drove slowly down the highway. He was sure that his brother-in-law had not been completely honest with him. What was all of the hush, hush about anyway? If he had been mugged why not make a full report? He didn’t know what was going on but he was going to find out.

  Kevin drove steadily as he turned onto Florida Boulevard, fingering the photographs. “All of those poker terms, he must be bluffing.” He said to himself. He probably didn’t even call the police. But Kevin wasn’t interested in turning the mayor in and creating a scandal. He truly just wanted the money. A flash of blue lights interrupted his thoughts. “Damned!” Kevin pulled over on the shoulder.

  A tall, young officer walked toward his car. He leaned into the window. “License and registration please.” He said as he scanned the interior of Kevin’s car.

  “What’s the problem officer?” Kevin asked calmly never looking the officer in the eye but recognizing him as the same officer who he had nodded to earlier.

  “The problem is that we don’t like muggers in our part of the woods. Particularly not blackmailing ones.” Dan backed up from the door. “Tell me just how did you think that you were going to get away with this?”

  Kevin shrugged and handed over the pictures. “Could you please just let me go and forget all of this?”

  “I could do a lot of things but right now I’m arresting your black ass. Step out of the car please.” The officer stepped aside to allow Kevin to get out of the car.

  Kevin didn’t need to be told to raise his hands over his head. He knew the drill.

  Chapter Eight

  Remy saw Bertrand sitting at the bar looking dejected. “Hey man, what’s bothering you? Why don’t you just let it all out?” Bertrand grunted and pushed a bar stool in Remy’s direction.

  “Man I wish I could tell you, it would make things easier for me.” Bertrand sighed heavily and took a deep drink of whiskey.

  “Then I’m your man, tell a brother.” Remy smiled but his eyes were steady and serious.

  “I’ll tell you this much, man you are a great singer. I see great things in you and I think that you are better than this place. I want to cut an album with you as soon as my studio is up and running.” Bertrand smiled easily his troubles momentarily lifted.

  “Are you trying to fire me boss?” Remy smiled and patted Bertrand on the shoulder.

  “No bro, but I am having what you might call Fi Nan Cial difficulties. I meant what I said about your singing on an album. Your shit is tight.” Bertrand looked over Remy’s shoulder to the door at passing tourists. The quarter was never really ever quiet he mused.

  “What are you talking about? The bar is packed every night. You aren’t gambling again are you?” Remy looked at his buddy concerned.

  “No man, c’mon now, why you getting all serious? Let me get you a beer.” Bertrand lifted heavily from the stool and went behind the empty bar to the freezer. He took out an ice cold beer and handed it to Remy who took it warily.

  “Bertrand man, I thought that you’d given that shit up.” Remy shook his head as he took a long draw of his beer.

  “I know huh?” Was all Bertrand could manage.

  “How much you owe this time?” Remy turned his seat away from the bar and faced the open windows of the French Quarter.

  “Too much man. I don’t know what I’m going to do. I’m into Marsalas for big money.”

  “Damn man. Damn.” Remy put the beer down on the bar and stood up.

  “I could lose the place Remy.” Bertrand said. “Don’t tell Sugar Doll.”

  “I won’t man but you’ve got a good thing here and to throw it all away on the roll of the dice is just well…” Remy looked disgusted.

  “Stupid I know.”

  One of the tourists walked into the empty bar, it was mid-morning so there was usually no traffic in the bar until noon. Bertrand usually manned the bar for those looking for the “hair of the dog” remedy. “Hey brother!” Bertrand shouted in his friendly, welcoming voice. What’s your poison?”

  “Man who you hollering at ‘Fat Boy’!” The man said laughing.

  “Now that’s uncalled for.” Remy said walking toward the stranger.

  “Kevin?” Bertrand burst from around the bar as fast as his fat body would take him. “Man, you ole criminal! When did you get out? I’ll be God Damned!” Bertrand pushed Remy aside and literally picked Kevin up into the air.

  “Oh I see, a family reunion. Well I’ll leave ya’ll to it.” Remy said as he headed out of the door.

  “Wait man, let me introduce you to my boyhood friend! He is just like family Bertrand said hugging Kevin sideways. Remy this is Kevin, Kevin Remy.” Bertrand smiled happily.

  “You hang out with white boys now?” Kevin smiled easily. “No offense.” Kevin nodded to Remy.

  “None taken. Well ya’ll, it’s been fun but I got to run. Nice to meet you Kevin.” The two men shook hands and Remy walked out into the sunny morning.

  “Man where you been hiding?” Bertrand looked earnestly at his friend.

  “I been busy man. I was up in Baton Rouge for awhile and I ran into a little trouble. I got out of it though.” Kevin smiled.

  “Ole weasel man, tell me what happened and I’ll get us a beer, it’s time to celebrate.” Bertrand went behind the bar, a new spring in his step. He opened the beers quickly ready to hear one of Kevin’s adventures. “You never let a niggah down man, anything I do you can top it.”

  “Bertrand man I had a sweet idea about that ole rascal Mayor Thompson. You know he loves mixing the honies but no one has ever caught his ass in the act. I staked him out for awhile and I discovered he had the gal in Zachary.” Kevin grinned thinking about it.

  “Kev man, weren’t you afraid of the Secret Service?” Bertrand asked.

  “Man, they only work for the president and trust me this man didn’t want nobody to know where he was going. He was as they say, ‘Out of Order!” Kevin giggled.

  “So you followed him and then what?” Bertrand asked.

  “Well then my friend I met his lady love Sha Keisha. A young girl about 16 or 17. She’s wise though, let me tell you. It was easy. I approached her and came up with an idea of blackmailing him. Hell hath no fury. He was still dipping in the wrong pool and she’d heard that he was about to go to different pastures. So she told me when he was coming to see her again. I showed up camera in hand and got some sweet pics. Trouble began when he saw me!” Kevin laughed.

  “He saw you man, was he naked?” Bertrand laughed incredulously the alcohol catching up with him.

  “Buck naked and let me tell you that is one yellow niggah! His ass is as wide as some of our home girls!” Both men burst into uncontrollable laughter. “Wait it gets better, the niggah came after me man!”

  “Naked?” Ber
trand asked in glee.

  “Naked and trying to pull his pants on. He ran right up the street.” Kevin said chuckling remembering it.

  “What did you do?” Bertrand’s eyes were wide as saucers.

  “Niggah what do you think I did, I ran, laughing my ass off. He almost caught me.” The two men stared at each other for a minute and then burst into another fit of uncontrollable laughter. Kevin had tears rolling down his cheeks as he continued the story.

  “Man, I got to the car and looked back and there was the mayor of Baton Rouge struggling with his pants and running back to the house. That was the most fun I’ve had since we were kids man.”

  “So you have the photos man? What you gonna do, blackmail his ass?” Bertrand asked seriously.

  “Naw man, I’m not finished with the story.” Kevin thought back to the previous week with delight.

  “What else could happen?” Bertrand asked confused.

  “So there I was driving down Florida Boulevard about to get on the I-10 when this cop comes up behind me with lights flashing.”

  “Man you ain’t never had no luck, you always get caught.” Bertrand looked resigned, the humor draining out of him.

  “Will you let me finish the story?” Kevin threw his arms up in the air.

  “Go ahead, I already know the ending.” Bertrand sighed.

  “No you don’t niggah. So anyway, the police officer comes up to the window and asked me where I was going. I told him New Orleans. He asked for my license and registration, the usual. Then he tells me that they don’t like no blackmailing niggahs up there.”

  Bertrand looked stunned, “He knew?”

  “And then some, he took the photos and put me in the backseat of the cop car. So I’m thinking, ‘Damn back to jail I go’. Then he got on the radio to say that the wrong man had been caught. He sat in the front seat of that cop car and looked at the photos and then he handed that shit back to me.” Kevin said.

  “Now I know you lying. Why did he do that?” Bertrand looked interested.

  “He said, ‘That son of a bitch is married to my sister. She doesn’t deserve this. I tell you what I’ll let you go if you promise to give those to the newspaper. She wouldn’t believe me if I told her but she’ll believe that shit. I feel really bad for her since our momma died. This way she can take him to the cleaner’s. Then he opened the back door and let me out of the car.”

  “That’s all? What else?” Bertrand asked.

  “He told me that if I just use it to blackmail the mayor he would find me and kill me clean.” Kevin nodded.

  “Why didn’t he just take the photos himself?” Bertrand asked.

  “I suppose he didn’t want his sister to find out that he had anything to do with it.” Kevin answered.

  “What did you do with those photos?” Bertrand was riveted by this story.

  “I sent copies to the Times Picayune, the Baton Rouge newspapers and to his house.” Kevin took a drink of his beer.

  “To his house niggah?” Bertrand asked in shock.

  “I figured that his wife had the right to know before the news struck. I know how that officer feels. I think that if it weren’t for the bad men in my mom’s life that she would have been a halfway decent woman instead of a drug addict.” Kevin sighed.

  “So you didn’t get any money from the deal?” Bertrand asked.

  “No, but I got the best story ever and the best laugh I’ve had in years. I’ll make money some other way.” Kevin replied and the two men toasted their beer bottles and chuckled.

  Sugar Doll hadn’t seen her mother since she was a teenager. She used to pray that her mother would come to see her when she was in high school. She would look into the audience for the familiar face when she sang in musicals but never once did her mother make an appearance. Now the shoe was on the other foot. She was within walking distance from her mother’s bar but she vowed she would never go there. Tony’s visit echoed in her head for weeks. She tried to make sense of it but could not.

  “Hey pretty, when are you going to dinner with me?” Remy asked as he placed his hands on her shoulders.

  “When you ask me.” Sugar Doll answered.

  “Well I’m asking.” Remy smiled handsomely.

  “Asking what?” Sugar Doll teased.

  “Would you Precious Bouvier, accompany me to Le Beaudreu for dinner?” “Well since you put it like that, no.” Sugar Doll laughed.

  “No, why not?” Remy asked.

  “I need advanced notice, like perhaps a week.”

  “Is Friday night enough time?” Remy looked hopeful.

  “I’m performing Friday.” Sugar Doll toyed with his jacket.

  “What about Saturday?” Remy asked.

  “You perform Saturday.” Sugar Doll smiled.

  “Monday?” Remy asked.

  “Monday might work.” Sugar smiled and went back to the dressing room.

  “Man she is driving me crazy!”

  The show was a success and the place was packed again. Bertrand was noticeably absent. He was always in the bar. No one knew where he was and this had Remy worried. He helped the night manager to close the bar at 4 a.m.

  “This is just not like Bertrand. He didn’t call or anything.” Royal said as he locked up the money for the evening.

  “He usually takes Sugar Doll home.” Remy commented. He walked out to the front to see Sugar Doll sitting by the stage.

  “Hey girl, do you need a ride?” Remy offered.

  “No thanks, Bertrand always brings me home, it’s kind of far from here.” Sugar Doll smiled.

  “I know where you live country girl. I don’t mind, I’m not working tomorrow or I should say today.” Remy walked over to her and took her hand. “C’mon let me give you a ride, you look tired.”

  “Thanks, thanks a lot.” Sugar Doll smiled.

  They drove mostly in silence for the first twenty minutes. Remy broke the silence. “Where do you think Bertrand is right now?” He asked.

  “Well, Kevin is in town so maybe they are together somewhere. You never know, when we were kids they were as thick as thieves.” Sugar Doll smiled.

  “Thieves being the operative word. This Kevin has a record or something?” Remy frowned.

  “Oh he would never do anything to Bertrand. He’s like family.” Sugar Doll smiled again.

  “Like family, I’ve heard that before.” Remy looked reluctant.

  “Well in this case it is true.” Sugar Doll said.

  “There is a wharf right down that lane, Bertrand took me there, have you ever been there?” Remy asked.

  “No, I never liked fishing.” Sugar Doll answered.

  “How about we watch the sun rise together? It’s about that time. What do you think?” Remy had already started to turn the car in that direction.

  “Okay, I guess.” Sugar Doll felt her heart speed up a little.

  The lane was long and the shells crackled under the tires. It was deserted back there. The old wharf looked like it couldn’t hold people. Its graying wood stood splintering in the darkness. The sky was becoming pale in the east. They both got out of the car and faced that direction.

  “Everything is so quiet and peaceful. I’ve never watched the sun come up in the morning. My mind is always filled with so many other things.”

  Remy studied her closely. His hand found hers and clasped it. He pulled her to him in one fluid motion. His arms were around the small of her back. He kissed her deeply and could feel her warmth against him as he caressed her smooth arms. The kiss was hot and it affected him deeply. He wanted to inhale her. She did not pull away from him as she had in the past. They kissed like this for quite awhile. When Sugar Doll looked up the sun had already risen. She felt the heat of the sun begin to warm her back “You’d better get me home. Big Ma will be worried.” Sugar Doll said flustered.

  Remy wanted to recapture the moment and grabbed her into his arms once again kissing her deeply, feeling his passion stirring for her. This time she did push him away.


  He took the hint and went to open her door. He crossed to his side looking at her. She was beautiful. He drove the rest of the way to her house quietly with none of his usual quips or jokes. His heart felt a yearning for her that he had never experienced before and he wanted to feel it. He wanted to get inside of the feeling and be surrounded by it. He wanted this feeling to consume him and it did.

  Sugar Doll felt the beauty of the moment and noticed the difference in Remy. He looked so serious now. She wanted to take his hand but was afraid that it would break the mood they had in the car. They arrived at Big Ma’s thirty minutes later. He got out of the car and opened the passenger side door for her.

  “Good night lovely.” He said and kissed her slightly swollen lips gently. She returned the sweet kiss.

  “Good night Remy, thanks for the ride.” Sugar Doll said as she walked away from him. The warm of his touch still tingled her hand.

  “We still have a date for Monday?” Remy called after her.

  “We still have a date.” Sugar Doll smiled that beautiful smile and walked up the steps of her grandmother’s white and green baby doll house.

  The drive home was a lesson in pleasure and torment for Remy. He knew that he would have to contend with Bertrand about Sugar Doll. But he knew in his heart of hearts that they could have something good. Remy thought of her lips and the way that she held him. She smelled of magnolia and jasmine. “How am I going to tell Bertrand?” He thought aloud to himself but he needn’t have worried. Bertrand had other things on his mind.

  Chapter Nine

  Mona stood at the counter wiping down the glasses from the night before. The bar was quiet and dark although it was bright and sunny outside. All of the wooden shutters were closed tight. She was ready to scream. Mona had a famous temper but nothing had made her angrier than what Tony had just told her. “That little heifer thinks that she’s better than me? I am the one who paid for all of those fancy clothes she wears. I am the one who sent her to the best private schools.”