Oxford World’s Classics

by Jane Austen

‘A hundred & seventy five Madam.’

  ‘Two hundred indeed Sir’ said my Mother.

  ‘And Remember I am to have a new Carriage hung as high as the Duttons’, & blue spotted with silver; and I shall expect a new Saddle horse,* a suit of fine lace,* and an infinite number of the most valuable Jewels. Diamonds such as never were seen! and Pearls, Rubies, Emeralds, and Beads out of number.* You must set up your Phaeton which must be cream coloured with a wreath of silver flowers round it, You must buy 4 of the finest Bays in the Kingdom & you must drive me in it every day. This is not all; You must entirely new furnish your House after my Taste, You must hire two more Footmen to attend me, two Women to wait on me, must always let me do just as I please and make a very good husband.’

  Here she stopped, I beleive rather out of breath.

  ‘This is all very reasonable Mr Watts for my Daughter to expect.’

  ‘And it is very reasonable Mrs Stanhope that your daughter should be disappointed.’ He was going on but Mary interrupted him

  ‘You must build me an elegant Greenhouse* & stock it with plants. You must let me spend every Winter in Bath, every Spring in Town,* Every Summer in taking some Tour,* and every autumn at a Watering Place,* and if we are at home the rest of the year (Sophy & I laughed) You must do nothing but give Balls and Masquerades. You must build a room on purpose & a Theatre to act Plays in.* The first Play we have shall be Which is the Man* and I will do Lady Bell Bloomer.’*

  ‘And pray Miss Stanhope (said Mr Watts) What am I to expect from you in return for all this?’

  ‘Expect? why you may expect to have me pleased.’

  ‘It would be odd if I did not. Your expectations Madam are too high for me, & I must apply to Miss Sophy who perhaps may not have raised her’s so much.’

  ‘You are mistaken Sir in supposing so, (said Sophy) for tho’ they may not be exactly in the same Line, yet my expectations are to the full as high as my Sister’s; for I expect my Husband to be good tempered & Chearful; to consult my Happiness in all his actions, & to love me with Constancy & Sincerity.’

  Mr Watts stared. ‘These are very odd Ideas truly Young Lady. You had better discard them before you marry, or you will be obliged to do it afterwards.’

  My Mother in the meantime was lecturing Mary who was sensible that she had gone too far, & when Mr Watts was just turning towards me in order I beleive to address me, she spoke to him in a voice half humble, half sulky.

  ‘You are mistaken Mr Watts if you think I was in earnest when I said I expected so much. However I must have a new Chaise.’

  ‘Yes Sir, you must allow that Mary has a right to expect that.’

  ‘Mrs Stanhope, I mean & have always meant to have a new one on my Marriage. But it shall be the colour of my present one.’

  ‘I think Mr Watts you should pay my Girl the compliment of consulting her Taste on such Matters.’

  Mr Watts would not agree to this, & for some time insisted upon its being a Chocolate colour, while Mary was as eager for having it blue with silver Spots. At length however Sophy proposed that to please Mr W. it should be a dark brown & to please Mary it should be hung rather high & have a silver Border.* This was at length agreed to, tho’ reluctantly on both sides, as each had intended to carry their point entire. We then proceeded to other Matters, & it was settled that they should be married as soon as the Writings* could be completed. Mary was very eager for a Special Licence & Mr Watts talked of Banns.* A common Licence* was at last agreed on. Mary is to have all the Family Jewels which are very inconsiderable I beleive & Mr W. promised to buy her a Saddle horse; but in return she is not to expect to go to Town or any other public place for these three Years. She is to have neither Greenhouse, Theatre or Phaeton; to be contented with one Maid without an additional Footman. It engrossed the whole Evening to settle these affairs; Mr W. supped with us & did not go till twelve. As soon as he was gone Mary exclaimed ‘Thank Heaven! he’s off at last; how I do hate him!’ It was in vain that Mama represented to her the impropriety she was guilty of in disliking him who was to be her Husband, for she persisted in declaring her aversion to him & hoping she might never see him again. What a Wedding will this be! Adeiu my dear Anne – Yr faithfully Sincere

  Georgiana Stanhope

  From the Same to the Same

  Dear Anne

  Saturday

  Mary eager to have every one know of her approaching Wedding & more particularly desirous of triumphing as she called it over the Duttons, desired us to walk with her this Morning to Stoneham. As we had nothing else to do we readily agreed, & had as pleasant a walk as we could have with Mary whose conversation entirely consisted in abusing the Man she is soon to marry & in longing for a blue Chaise spotted with Silver. When we reached the Duttons we found the two Girls in the dressing-room with a very handsome Young Man, who was of course introduced to us. He is the son of Sir Henry Brudenell of Leicestershire. Mr Brudenell is the handsomest Man I ever saw in my Life; we are all three very much pleased with him. Mary, who from the moment of our reaching the Dressing-room had been swelling with the knowledge of her own importance & with the Desire of making it known, could not remain long silent on the Subject after we were seated, & soon addressing herself to Kitty said,

  ‘Dont you think it will be necessary to have all the Jewels new set?’

  ‘Necessary for what?’

  ‘For What! Why for my appearance.’*

  ‘I beg your pardon but I really do not understand you. What Jewels do you speak of, and where is your appearance to be made?’

  ‘At the next Ball to be sure after I am married.’

  You may imagine their Surprise. They were at first incredulous, but on our joining in the Story they at last beleived it. ‘And who is it to’ was of course the first Question. Mary pretended Bashfulness, & answered in Confusion her Eyes cast down ‘to Mr Watts’. This also required Confirmation from us, for that anyone who had the Beauty & fortune (tho’ small yet a provision)* of Mary would willingly marry Mr Watts, could by them scarcely be credited. The subject being now fairly introduced and she found herself the object of every one’s attention in company, she lost all her confusion & became perfectly unreserved & communicative.

  ‘I wonder you should never have heard of it before for in general things of this Nature are very well known in the Neighbourhood.’

  ‘I assure you said Jemima* I never had the least suspicion of such an affair. Has it been in agitation long?’

  ‘Oh! yes, ever since Wednesday.’

  They all smiled particularly Mr Brudenell.

  ‘You must know Mr Watts is very much in love with me, so that it is quite a match of Affection on his side.’

  ‘Not on his only, I suppose’ said Kitty.

  ‘Oh! when there is so much Love on one side there is no occasion for it on the other. However I do not much dislike him tho’ he is very plain to be sure.’

  Mr Brudenell stared, the Miss Duttons laughed & Sophy & I were heartily ashamed of our Sister. She went on.

  ‘We are to have a new Postchaise and very likely may set up our Phaeton.’

  This we knew to be false but the poor Girl was pleased at the idea of persuading the company that such a thing was to be & I would not deprive her of so harmless an Enjoyment. She continued.

  ‘Mr Watts is to present me with the family Jewels which I fancy are very considerable.’ I could not help whispering Sophy ‘I fancy not’.

  ‘These Jewels are what I suppose must be new set before they can be worn. I shall not wear them till the first Ball I go to after my Marriage. If Mrs Dutton should not go to it, I hope you will let me chaprone you; I shall certainly take Sophy & Georgiana.’

  ‘You are very good (said Kitty) & since you are inclined to undertake the Care of young Ladies, I should advise you to prevail on Mrs Edgecumbe to let you chaprone her six Daughters which with your two Sisters and ourselves will make your Entrée* very respectable.’

  Kitty made us all smile except Mary who did not under
stand her Meaning & coolly said that she should not like to chaprone so many.

  Sophy & I now endeavoured to change the conversation but succeeded only for a few Minutes, for Mary took care to bring back their attention to her & her approaching Wedding. I was sorry for my Sister’s sake to see that Mr Brudenell seemed to take pleasure in listening to her account of it, & even encouraged her by his Questions & Remarks, for it was evident that his only Aim was to laugh at her. I am afraid he found her very ridiculous. He kept his Countenance extremely well, yet it was easy to see that it was with difficulty he kept it. At length however he seemed fatigued & Disgusted with her ridiculous Conversation, as he turned from her to us, & spoke but little to her for about half an hour before we left Stoneham. As soon as we were out of the House we all joined in praising the Person & Manners of Mr Brudenell.

  We found Mr Watts at home.

  ‘So, Miss Stanhope (said he) you see I am come a courting in a true Lover like Manner.’

  ‘Well you need not have told me that. I knew why you came very well.’

  Sophy & I then left the room, imagining of course that we must be in the way, if a Scene of Courtship were to begin. We were surprised at being followed almost immediately by Mary.

  ‘And is your Courting so soon over?’ said Sophy.

  ‘Courting! (replied Mary) we have been quarrelling. Watts is such a Fool! I hope I shall never see him again.’

  ‘I am afraid you will, (said I) as he dines here to day. But what has been your dispute?’

  ‘Why only because I told him that I had seen a Man much handsomer than he was this Morning, he flew into a great Passion & called me a Vixen,* so I only stayed to tell him I thought him a Blackguard* & came away.’

  ‘Short and sweet; (said Sophy.) but pray Mary how will this be made up?’

  ‘He ought to ask my pardon; but if he did, I would not forgive him.’

  ‘His Submission then would not be very useful.’

  When we were dressed* we returned to the Parlour where Mama & Mr Watts were in close Conversation. It seems that he had been complaining to her of her Daughter’s behaviour, & she had persuaded him to think no more of it. He therefore met Mary with all his accustomed Civility, & except one touch at the Phaeton and another at the Greenhouse, the Evening went off with great Harmony & Cordiality. Watts is going to Town to hasten the preparations for the Wedding.

  I am your affec.te Freind G. S.

  [Detached peices]

  To Miss Jane Anna Elizabeth Austen*

  My Dear Neice

  Though you are at this period not many degrees removed from Infancy, Yet trusting that you will in time be older,* and that through the care of your excellent Parent* You will one day or another be able to read written hand, I dedicate to You the following Miscellanious Morsels, convinced that if you seriously attend to them, You will derive from them very important Instructions, with regard to your Conduct in Life.—If such my hopes should hereafter be realized, never shall I regret the Days and Nights that have been spent in composing these Treatises for your Benefit—.* I am my dear Neice

  Your very Affectionate

  Aunt.

  June 2dThe Author1793—

  [A fragment—written to inculcate the practise of Virtue]*

  A beautiful description* of the different effects of Sensibility* on different Minds

  I am but just returned from Melissa’s* Bedside, & in my Life tho’ it has been a pretty long one, & I have during the course of it been at many Bedsides, I never saw so affecting an object as she exhibits. She lies wrapped in a book muslin* bedgown, a chambray gauze shift,* & a french net nightcap.* Sir William is constantly at her bedside. The only repose he takes is on the Sopha in the Drawing room, where for five minutes every fortnight he remains in an imperfect Slumber, starting up every Moment & exclaiming ‘Oh! Melissa, Ah! Melissa,’ then sinking down again, raises his left arm and scratches his head. Poor Mrs Burnaby is beyond measure afflicted. She sighs every now and then, that is about once a week; while the melancholy Charles says every moment, ‘Melissa how are you?’ The lovely Sisters are much to be pitied. Julia is ever lamenting the situation of her friend, while lying behind her pillow & supporting her head—Maria more mild in her greif talks of going to Town next week, and Anna is always recurring to the pleasures we once enjoyed when Melissa was well.—I am usually at the fire cooking some little delicacy for the unhappy invalid—Perhaps hashing up the remains of an old Duck,* toasting some cheese* or making a Curry* which are the favourite dishes of our poor friend.—In these situations we were this morning surprized by receiving a visit from Dr Dowkins; ‘I am come to see Melissa,’ said he. ‘How is She?’ ‘Very weak indeed,’ said the fainting Melissa—‘Very weak, replied the punning Doctor, aye indeed it is more than a very week since you have taken to your bed—How is your appetite?’ ‘Bad, very bad, said Julia.’ ‘That is very bad—replied he. Are her spirits good, Madam?’ ‘So poorly Sir that we are obliged to strengthen her with cordials* every Minute.’—‘Well then she receives Spirits from your being with her. Does she sleep?’ ‘Scarcely ever—.’ ‘And Ever Scarcely I suppose when she does. Poor thing! Does she think of dieing?’ ‘She has not strength to think at all.’ ‘Nay then she cannot think to have Strength.’—

  The generous Curate*—

  a moral Tale,* setting forth the Advantages of being Generous and a Curate.

  In a part little known of the County of Warwick, a very worthy Clergyman* lately resided. The income of his living which amounted to about two hundred pound,* & the interest of his Wife’s fortune which was nothing at all, was entirely sufficient for the Wants & Wishes of a Family who neither wanted or wished for anything beyond what their income afforded them. Mr Williams had been in possession of his living above twenty Years, when this history commences, & his Marriage which had taken place soon after his presentation to it, had made him the father of six very fine Children. The eldest had been placed at the Royal Academy for Seamen at Portsmouth* when about thirteen years old, and from thence had been discharged on board of one of the Vessels of a small fleet destined for Newfoundland,* where his promising & amiable disposition had procured him many friends among the Natives, & from whence he regularly sent home a large Newfoundland Dog* every Month* to his family. The second, who was also a Son had been adopted by a neighbouring Clergyman* with the intention of educating him at his own expence, which would have been a very desirable Circumstance had the Gentleman’s fortune been equal to his generosity, but as he had nothing to support himself and a very large family but a Curacy of fifty pound a year,* Young Williams knew nothing more at the age of 18 than what a twopenny Dame’s School* in the village could teach him. His Character however was perfectly amiable though his genius* might be cramped, and he was addicted to no vice, or ever guilty of any fault beyond what his age and situation rendered perfectly excusable. He had indeed sometimes been detected in flinging Stones at a Duck or putting brickbats* into his Benefactor’s bed; but these innocent efforts of wit were considered by that good Man rather as the effects of a lively imagination, than of anything bad in his Nature, and if any punishment were decreed for the offence it was in general no greater than that the Culprit should pick up the Stones or take the brickbats away.—

  Finis

  To Miss Austen,* the following Ode to Pity* is dedicated, from a thorough knowledge of her pitiful* Nature, by her obedt hum1e Servt

  The Author

  Ode to Pity

  1

  Ever musing I delight to tread

  The Paths of honour* and the Myrtle* Grove

  Whilst the pale Moon her beams doth shed

  On disappointed Love.

  While Philomel* on airy hawthorn Bush

  Sings sweet & Melancholy, And the thrush

  Converses with the Dove.

  2

  Gently brawling down the turnpike road,

  Sweetly noisy falls the Silent Stream*—

  The Moon emerges from behind a Cloud


  And darts upon the Myrtle Grove her beam.

  Ah! then what Lovely Scenes appear,

  The hut, the Cot, the Grot,* & Chapel queer,

  And eke* the Abbey too a mouldering heap,*

  Conceal’d by aged pines* her head doth rear

  And quite invisible doth take a peep.

  End of the first volume.

  June 3d 1793*

  Volume the Second

  Ex dono mei Patris*

  Contents*

  Love and Friendship*

  Lesley-Castle

  The History of England

  Collection of Letters

  Scraps

  To Madame La Comtesse De Feuillide*

  This Novel is inscribed

  by

  Her obliged Humble Servant

  The Author

  Love and Freindship*

  a novel

  in a series of Letters.*

  ‘Deceived in Freindship & Betrayed in Love’*

  Letter the First

  From Isabel to Laura*

  How often, in answer to my repeated intreaties that you would give my Daughter a regular detail of the Misfortunes and Adventures of your Life,* have you said ‘No, my freind never will I comply with your request till I may be no longer in Danger of again experiencing such dreadful ones.’

  Surely that time is now at hand. You are this Day 55. If a woman may ever be said to be in safety from the determined Perseverance of disagreable Lovers and the cruel Persecutions of obstinate Fathers,* surely it must be at such a time of Life.

  Isabel.