I’m also hoping that this holiday will provide us with the time we so ardently need to be alone. To figure out where we go from here and how to make closure with our past. There has been so much sadness, anger, jealousy and betrayal… I crave peace and normality. I yearn for it with every fibre of my being but still don’t know if it is even possible.
Zack assures me that it is but I’m still not sure. It’s going to take a while for me to believe in happy endings…
Chapter One
The hotel which Zack booked for us is exquisite. I couldn’t believe my eyes when I first saw it. Five stars with a breath-taking view and a beautiful interior. He didn’t even tell me he had arranged for us to stay in the master suite of the hotel until we got here.
We decided on St. Tropez because I was extremely anxious about the flight. I’m not the best traveller and knew I would feel more at ease if we had a short journey. I’ve only been on a plane once in my entire life and that was when I went to Spain with my mum, Rachel and my brother. I was only twelve at the time and don’t remember a great deal about it except that I wasn’t a big fan of flying even then.
Zack was a little disappointed because he wanted to take me a little further. He had his heart set on Barbados but when I found out how long the flight would be, I wasn’t having any of it.
We flew one week after Zack managed to convince me to go away with him and there were so many times I came close to cancelling altogether. I knew it was just my anxiety building up and made sure I discussed all the issues I was having at the thought of going away with my therapist. She helped me to realise that it was all just part of the process and explained the reason behind my agitation and anxiety. It was quite simple really and helped me to understand why the panic I experience when I don’t feel in control. After all, I was about to remove myself from my comfort zone and it was only natural I would find this unsettling. In the end she gave me the strength to go ahead with my vacation and even though I was extremely nervous throughout our two-hour flight, I’m so proud of myself now that I’m finally here.
Zack insisted that he stay with me in my apartment after I received that hateful letter. He didn’t even want to go into work until I convinced him that I would be ok by myself. I’m still not certain about what’s going to happen once we get back from our vacation. I know Zack doesn’t want us to live apart anymore and the more I think about it, neither do I.
The weather isn’t too hot at this time of year but to be honest I’m glad of that, I don’t particularly like the scorching heat and at least the temperature is still pleasant enough for us to enjoy our time here together.
Most mornings we wake up around ten and spend the next couple of hours in bed before ordering room service for a late breakfast/early brunch. After dinner we take a stroll on one of the local beaches and return back to the hotel to get ready for our evening meal. We normally choose one of the restaurants in the port and dine there until late, taking one final walk along the beach before we return to the hotel.
For some reason all the walking we did earlier on today hasn’t tired me out yet. It’s three o’clock in the morning and I’m still wide awake. Zack is sound asleep beside me, breathing softly. I long to wake him but know that would be so unfair of me. He’s been working so hard lately, this holiday is exactly what he needed and I just can’t bring myself to disturb him.
Deciding to get up, I tip toe out of the bedroom and open the sliding door which leads out onto the balcony. I made sure to grab a thin sweater before I came out here, knowing the temperature would be quite low at this time of night. Our hotel is right by the ocean which makes it even cooler.
Curling up on one of the chairs outside, I can’t help admiring the spectacular view before me. The moonlight is glittering off the waves against the shore, illuminating the white yachts in the harbour. I breathe deeply, allowing my lungs to take in the fresh air which is coming off the ocean. I wonder what it would be like if we stayed here? I know it’s impossible and not practical at all but the thought of staying here indefinitely fills me with a sense of calm I’m not familiar with.
“What are you doing out here?”
Startled by the sound of Zack’s voice behind me, I turn around and smile up at him. He’s shirtless but is wearing a pair of his black boxer shorts, something he must have slipped on before he came out here to find me.
“I couldn’t sleep.” I yawn, raking my fingers through my blonde hair.
I decided to go back to being blonde a couple of weeks after Zack found me. I never felt like myself when I was dark and eventually came to realise that the drastic change I had made to my hair was my own way of trying to change something inside of me. I mistakenly believed that you can alter something which is internal by transforming the external. This isn’t true and as soon as this realisation dawned on me, I changed my hair back to its usual colour. Zack was especially pleased when he saw the result, telling me the blonde reminded him of the girl he first met. The girl he could not stay away from and the girl he felt absolutely compelled to be with.
“Why didn’t you wake me?” He asks, joining me on the balcony.
“I didn’t want to disturb you. This is your vacation too.”
“Don’t be silly. If you had woken me, we could have easily come up with something that would tire you out.” He says flirtatiously, making sure I don’t misunderstand the meaning behind his comment.
“Oh, really? Like what?”
“Want me to show you?”
Before I even have a chance to respond to him, he lowers himself to his knees with a mischievous smirk all over his face, slowly parting my bare legs with his strong and capable hands. I close my eyes and lie back in the chair, surrendering myself to him as he spreads my thighs. I’m completely exposed to him, bare and uncovered. This used to be something I was incredibly self-conscious about but now… now I welcome it and take delight in the fact that he finds me so desirable and irresistible to him. He hooks his fingers underneath the flimsy fabric of my underwear, gliding them down my legs as his mouth trails kisses down the inside of my thigh.
I moan loudly and arch my back, silently begging him to give me more of his sensual touch.
“What is it you want?” He taunts me, locking those smouldering brown eyes of his on my own. “Tell me.”
“I… I want. God, Zack, please!” I beg him, struggling to formulate the words I need.
“If you say it...” He growls seductively, refusing to break eye contact with me for a single second. “If you tell me what you need, I’ll give it to you. Otherwise I won’t know what it is that you want.”
Zack’s doing this on freaking purpose, I know he is. He’s purposefully tormenting me and he’s enjoying every single moment of it. He won’t give in until I admit defeat, demanding that I submit myself to him in every possible way.
“I need you. I need your mouth… on me, Zack. Please!”
“You want me to taste you?” He teases me once more until I’m left teetering on the very edge of what I can handle.
“Yes!” I moan loudly, throwing my head back as I circle my hips in front of him, taken over by my intense arousal for him.
I’ve never behaved like this before, I’ve always been to shy or embarrassed to act so brazen and bold.
“You want me to taste this sweet, wet little pussy of yours?”
“Uh-huh.” I mumble incoherently, placing my hands on my knees as I pull them up against my chest.
“Fuck, baby. You have no idea how incredible you look right now, so open and responsive. Say what you want me to do to you and I won’t stop, I’ll make love to you with my mouth until you come, until you come all over me, right in my mouth and on my face.”
“Zack, please. You’re killing me.”
“Just three words from you and you can have it.”
“Fine!” I exclaim loudly, almost angry with him for doing this to me. “Ok, ok. I want… I want you to eat my pussy.”
“That wasn’t so hard,
was it?” He goads me some more, triumphant now over his victory.
His tongue finally makes contact with me, deliciously gliding up and down the most sensitive part of myself. His fingers separate me, tracing small circles around my clitoris with the tip of his tongue. I tremble uncontrollably, burning with the unexplainable need I have for him.
He widens my legs some more, burying his face between them as he devours me. It’s as though he’s starving and I’m his only lifeline, his one and only source of salvation. I’m close to losing my mind, consumed by the elation and the exquisite ecstasy that his touch provides me. His tongue plunges all the way inside of me, stealing the very breath from my lungs as I try to suppress my screams of pleasure.
“Come for me, baby. Come all over me. Use me, Sam. Take what you need from me and let go. I know you need this and I’m always going to be the one to give it to you.”
His words are my undoing. My whole body ignites, exploding with the immeasurable passion that has always been there between us. Unable to deny it for a second longer, I decide to give into the temptation of Zack and the power he has over me.
My complete and utter abandonment seems to spur him on even more. He’s relentless in his pursuit of me and my pleasure, thrusting his tongue in and out of me whilst circling my clitoris with his thumb. I’ve never seen him like this before, he’s almost furious. Frenzied and impassioned to the point of madness.
He’s insists that I should come again even though I just did. He won’t take no for an answer and I should know more than anyone that once Zack sets his mind on something, he’s more than likely going to get it.
“Zack, I…I don’t think I can.” I whimper, trying to evade him and his persistency.
“You can.” He growls seductively, tightening the firm grasp he already has on my upper thighs.
“N-not yet. I can’t do it.”
He pauses, glancing up at me in contemplation. He looks deep in thought for a few more seconds before he breaks his silence, pulling himself up onto his feet.
“Let’s go inside.”
“Why?”
“Just trust me.” He says, offering me his hand.
I take it and follow him back into the hotel room. My legs are still trembling and I feel as though all of the energy I had has just been sucked out of me, leaving me with a weightless sensation. I feel like I’m light enough to walk on air and I don’t know whether I like this newfound response my body is experiencing for the first time.
“What now?” I ask hesitantly, turning around to face him.
“Get on the bed.”
His tone of voice is commanding. I’m unable to ignore it and automatically respond to him in a way I never have done before. Zack’s dominant side is still something we have yet to explore as well as something I’m intrigued by.
I climb onto the bed and lie down, watching him intently. I’ve been choosing to sleep in Zack’s old T-shirts since we’ve been away and it’s the only item of clothing I’m now wearing since my underwear has been discarded, left on the balcony without a second thought.
“Get on your hands and knees.” He instructs me, standing at the foot of the bed.
His penetrating gaze burns a hole right through me, watching me intensely as he observes me closely.
I do as he asks and wait for him to join me, struggling to gain control over my irregular breathing.
“Take off my shirt.” He directs me, maintaining his distant position away from me.
“Open your legs a little wider.” He commands. “I want to see you. I want to see every single part of you.”
I take a deep breath and spread my thighs even more, completely exposing myself to him like I did earlier.
“You have no idea how beautiful you are, do you?” He whispers reverently, coming up behind me. “You haven’t got a single clue how perfect you are and that makes you even more irresistible to me.”
His large hand rests on my right hip, squeezing me gently. I can hear his laboured breathing and know how hard this must be for him to keep his hands to himself.
“How badly do you want me?” I challenge him, deciding to get my own back for the way in which he teased me earlier.
“Words can’t even begin to describe how much I want you.” He answers truthfully. “You’ve been driving me insane from the first moment that I saw you.”
“But why? Why me?”
“I can’t explain it, Samantha. The truth is you belong to me and you always have done. You were destined to be mine.”
He wraps his fingers around my hair, pulling on it gently. I arch my back and moan loudly, enjoying the delicious and tantalising dominance he’s exerting over me. My arousal stems from the fact that I trust Zack completely. I know that he would never, ever hurt me and because of the trust that already exists between us, it makes me feel empowered and exhilarated when it comes to offering myself to him so freely. I want him to take control like this and I have no qualms about our sexual experimentation.
“I need this, Sam. I need you. Please let me take you. Let me take you how I want to. Let me give you what you need.”
I nod my head, giving him my silent consent.
“Do it.” I encourage him, pushing myself back against him, practically begging him.
He grabs hold of my hips firmly, removing his boxer shorts in one swift movement. He steals my breath away as he plunges all the way inside of my body, completing me in a way I can’t even begin to describe.
It’s only when we’re connected like this that I feel… whole. I feel like a whole person when we make love and I know it’s because of him and the way he makes me feel about myself. It’s like we’re two halves of the same person and when we’re connected so intimately like this, it unites the fractured pieces of our souls. All of the pain and the heartache we’ve both experienced over the past few months fades into the background and all that’s left is the two of us.
As it should be.
“You feel so perfect. You are perfect.” Zack groans, tightening the relentless grasp he has on my hips. “I will never get tired or used to seeing you like this.”
“Like what?” I ask, panting heavily, fisting the soft quilt beneath my fingers.
“Naked. Wet and open for me. Only me.” He growls possessively.
“Always.” I cry, throwing my head back as he continues to thrust himself inside of me, taking me from behind as he controls everything.
“No one else. No one else will ever see you like this, do you understand?”
“Yes! Yes, I know they won’t. Please, Zack… just keep going.” I plead with him desperately.
“Turn around, baby. I want you to take control.”
He gently pulls himself out of me, lifting me up until I’m straddling his waist. He locks those magnificent brown eyes onto my own, lowering me onto his arousal slowly. Zack is really big and it took me some time to get used to his size. It’s not like I was highly experienced before I met him, having only slept with one person on one occasion before Zack.
“Y-you want me to…?”
I can hardly say the words, struck by the overwhelming fear of letting go of my inhibitions. At the same time I crave abandonment and the exhilaration which goes with it.
“Yeah, I do.” He replies boldly, stroking the side of my face softly. “Ride me, sweetheart. Take it all, I’m all yours.”
His words turn me on and ignite something deep inside of me, spurring me on. I rest my hands on his shoulders, wary at first when it comes to being the one in control. I start to circle my hips before finding the courage to move up and down, delighting in the exquisite sensations taking over me once again.
Zack places his hand on the back of my neck, pulling me in for a passionate kiss. Our tongues meet, stroking one another until I wrap my lips around his, sucking on it in the hopes that it will entice him even more.
“Samantha, what are you doing to me? You’re driving me crazy.”
“Is that such a bad thing?” I ask, increas
ing my pace above him.
“Of course not, it just means I can’t get enough of you.” He groans deeply, squeezing my behind tightly.
“Is that such a bad thing?” I taunt him, purposefully repeating my question.
“No.” He chuckles lightly, enfolding his arms around my small frame. “I need you to come for me again, can you do that? I want you to come all over me like you just came for me a few moments ago. Tell me you can do it for me, baby.”
“Uh-huh. I think so.”
My hair is damp and so is my forehead. The temperature in the room has risen, adding even more stimulation to the atmosphere between us.
“You can? Good girl. I need you to ride me and show me how much you want it. It’s all yours. You know that, don’t you? Take it all, baby.”
“All mine.” I whisper, echoing his statement.
“That’s right.”
As I allow the knowledge of this to sink in, my movements accelerate. Within seconds, my head is thrown back, my back is arched and my hips are grinding above Zack. Our lips find each other, our tongues engaging in an intimate and sensual caress. We exchange oxygen, swallowing one another’s moans as we continue to arouse and stimulate the other person. I push him to the proverbial precipice of pleasure, persistent in my quest to satisfy him.
“I-I need to…”
“What is it you need? You need to come?”
“Yes. Please, Zack.”
“Take it, baby. Take what you need from me. I’m here, I’m right here for you. Come on me, come all over me.”
“Oh my God!”
I explode around him, squeezing him so tightly. My body contracts as my legs begin to tremble uncontrollably, my moans reach new heights, delighting in the indescribable elation that comes from us being connected like this. Making love with Zack is the one and only time I find peace, freedom and exhilaration. For someone who has lived the majority of their life feeling trapped and uncomfortable in my own skin, to transition into something else entirely.
Zack enables me to overcome the negativity of my past, his mere presence provides me with the confidence that I need to embrace my own sexuality. For the first time I feel comfortable within my own sexual skin and for that… I am thankful.
Now It's Just Us (Wrong Girl Book 2) Page 3