Monachopsis

by Lyra Winters

  "Are you ready to become Alpha?" Dad asked as I sat down next to Mom, placing my hands in the center of my lap.

  "Absolutely," I said.

  Becoming Alpha meant a lot to me. It was the one thing that had kept me going these past couple of years. I would be responsible for the Maxwell pack, and they would depend on me. I was more than prepared for that.

  "Are you ready to plan the ceremony?" Mom smiled.

  It was pack law that whenever a pack obtained a new Alpha, there must be a ceremony held that invited all Alphas around the globe to attend. There were only about forty packs known, but more remained unregistered. This Ceremony was something they had groomed me for since I was just a pup, so I knew exactly how I wanted it to go. The only part I hadn't planned on was taking over the pack without a mate.

  "Let the planning commence," Riley said with a long sigh.

  Two hours later, and we had planned the entire ceremony from beginning to end. I was satisfied with the schedule, but we still had some details to work out with my pack ranks.

  "Let's start off with your two best pack warriors," Dad suggested.

  "I want Jason and Holly. They've been trained for the positions since their fathers are your warriors." I wrote their names in the small black journal.

  "Aren't you worried about them being mates?" Riley asked.

  I shrugged. "They work best together."

  "Who do you want to fall below Jason and Holly? You need about twenty wolves," Dad said.

  I stifled a yawn. "I'll check with Jason and Holly since they'll be the ones training them. I'll get it settled by the time the ceremony comes."

  "Good. What about your Gamma?"

  "Xavier."

  "Xavier? That man-whore?" Ivy snorted, not looking up from her phone screen.

  My body stiffened. "He's loyal, he's determined, he's motivated, and he's dependable."

  "You sure it's not 'cause you're fucking him?" Ivy asked.

  "That's none of your business," I snapped. "Besides, you have no say in who my Gamma will be." I scribbled his name down.

  Mom cleared her throat, squinting her eyes at Ivy. "Language. Your father and I don't need to know about your sister's love life."

  "I wouldn't consider it a love life." She snickered in reply.

  "Alright, who would you like to be your Beta?" Dad asked, his eyes unmoving from the journal.

  I knew what Ivy said had struck a nerve with my parents. It's not that they didn't approve of Xavier. It's that Xavier, and I had no romantic feelings for each other. He was warming my bed, and I was doing the same for him. Once he found his mate, we would end, and I was fine with that. I expected it and so did he. Though, I knew our arrangement worried my parents.

  I tapped my pen. "Riley will be my Beta." I jotted her name down.

  Riley jumped up from her spot and wrapped her arms around me. "Are you serious?"

  I leaned into her hug. "I couldn't have picked anyone better."

  That was true. There was no one else I'd trust to run this pack by my side. Riley had proved her devotion to me not only as her sister, but as a wolf.

  When I was rejected, she never left my side.

  Her and Xavier were the only two who cared enough about me to stay. My other friends from the pack abandoned me once they caught word I was rejected for Ivy. The pack showed me respect as an Alpha's daughter, but as a she-wolf they looked down on me—I could sense it. If my soulmate didn't even want me, why would anyone else?

  "You're kidding me!" Ivy bounced up off the loveseat, tossing her phone to the side.

  Riley grunted before going back to her seat. "Here we go."

  I stood up, crossing my arms as I waited for another one of her famous tantrums.

  "This position should go to me or Nolan! Nolan is dad's Beta's son. I'm your sister and I'm married to the Beta's son. It should be one of us!" She stomped her foot on the wooden floor.

  I gritted my teeth and took a deep breath. Don't kill her, I thought to myself. "Nolan's a piece of shit. Someone who could deny their mate, something considered sacred in the werewolf community, is not someone I want high in my pack ranks. As for you, you're irresponsible, immature, and you're impulsive. I'm honestly shocked you thought for a second I would have either of you running this pack by my side."

  She huffed, turning away from my glare. "Mom! Dad!"

  "This is your sister's decision," Mom said. Her eyes unwavered from Ivy.

  "I don't care! She's wrong. I don't even know why we always have to come to this stupid little shack. Why can't you just come to the pack house?" She crossed her arms and stared me in the eyes.

  A burst of anger rippled through my body and I clenched my jaw.

  "Ivy! Really?" Riley shook her head at her.

  Ivy rolled her eyes. "Nolan and I have been married for a year and a half. We are trying for a family."

  "You've been trying for how long?" Riley snorted. "It's almost impossible to have a pup with someone who isn't your mate. It's not natural for our kind."

  She growled. "Don't you think I know that?"

  "Girls." Mom was always trying to keep the peace between the sisters. Problem was, we had no peace with Ivy around. She always found something to argue about. She thrived off negative attention.

  "You're just going to get over yourself and deal with it. He chose me, after all." Ivy smirked.

  I let out a chuckle, anger swirling around inside me. "Oh, my fates, I just want to claw that look off your face." I took a small step toward her. "You're a manipulative bitch, Ivy. Your mate got killed, so you had to take someone else's."

  Her eyes grew wide, but it only pissed me off more. She tried to play the victim every time she'd hit a nerve with someone. The only reason she got away with it was that she's an Alpha's daughter, but then again, so was I. I didn't know how my wolf hadn't killed her yet with the disrespect she'd thrown my way.

  "Sophia! Reign it in." Dad used his Alpha command on me to contain my wolf.

  I snarled in his direction, disregarding the pleas in the room.

  I stormed out, shifting into my jet-black wolf. My skin sprouted fur, ripping through my epidermis. My claws ripped through the flesh of my fingers, and my bones snapped into a new form. I had become so numb to the pain of shifting that it didn't bother me anymore. My paws gripped the soil as I took off sprinting along the river and as far away from Ivy as my wolf would carry me.

  I arrived back at my cottage a few hours after my inability to control my shift. The only control I had managed to keep over my wolf was not to kill my sister. If I could even call her that. I followed the river for miles, not stopping until the pounding in my head ceased. Once I felt the anger seep away, I turned around and ran back home.

  I shifted back to my human form on the safety of my back porch. The crisp wind nipped at my exposed skin, causing me to shiver. I ran a hand over my face mumbling a "fuck" as my back door opened, revealing Xavier.

  His brown hair was disheveled, tanned-skin on display with him only wearing a pair of boxer briefs, as his chocolate brown eyes met mine. A smirk played across his face. "Couldn't contain your wolf?"

  I rolled my eyes, pushing him back inside before slamming the door shut behind us.

  "Not that I'm complaining. You know I love seeing you naked." He winked, grabbing my shoulders and pulling me into his chest. His strong arms wrapped around me as he rubbed circles on my back. "Riley told me you lost control of your wolf."

  Xavier was warm and comforting. I felt content when I was around him, the same way I did when we were just friends. I stepped out of his embrace, walking toward the bedroom.

  "Ivy was explicit about our arrangement to my parents once again," I said, shaking my head.

  He paused for a moment before starting to walk behind me again. "Arrangement? Fuck, Sophia. I think I'm more than just an arrangement."

  As we approached my bed, I spun around on my heels. His expression was stern as he gripped my chin by his thumb and index finger. "Look
at me."

  My hand rested on his arm as I stared at him. "You know you're my best friend."

  He sighed, letting me go. "Right. That's all I'll ever be to you."

  My eyebrows knitted into a frown. "Xavier, you have a mate out there."

  His eyes flashed and he stepped closer, towering over me. "Don't you think I know that? I can't help but feel something for you though. I have since we were younger."

  A gasp escaped my mouth. His lips descended on mine. He seared me with his kiss as we fell back onto the bed. His lips felt warm, but I pushed against his chest to stop him.

  "Xavier. We need to stop." I said.

  "Why? You know you feel it too." He sighed, sitting up. "I've been in love with you for a long time. Forever almost."

  I sat up, gathering the covers and wrapping them around me. "You haven't met your mate," I paused. What if the same thing happened to her? I could never live with myself. "It's a different feeling. You won't know what real love is until you meet her. I promise you that."

  "I don't care because I haven't met her yet. Who knows if I'll ever meet her?" He started to sound like Ivy.

  "You will, and then you'll understand what I mean." My hand rested on his shoulder. "You can't be unfair to her. You promised me you would always have your heart open for her. You're talking like you've already broken that promise."

  His eyes welled up with unshed tears. "I know." He ran a frustrated hand through his hair. "Fuck. I'm sorry, Sophia. I'm so sorry." He gripped his hair and then looked up. "What happens when we stop this? What happens to us?"

  "We'll still be best friends. Just like we always have been." I tilted my head to the side. "You are my Gamma, after all."

  His mouth gaped. "Are you fucking serious?"

  I nodded. I knew he was angry. Hurt even, but I couldn't let the same thing happen to him. I just couldn't. "Regardless of what we are to each other, I know I will always be able to count on you."

  He was quiet for a moment, then a big smile spread across his face. "What if we celebrated? You become Alpha in two days. What's the harm in that?"

  I bit my lip. The devious little devil. I knew it was wrong but I couldn't help but want to give in.

  "You let me take your virginity, Sophia. What is one last time going to hurt?" He pouted his lip, tucking a piece of hair behind my ear.

  I leaned my head against his palm. "One last time. Then, that's it. Promise me?"

  "Cross my heart, Soph." He used my childhood nickname as he used his finger to cross over his chest.

  "This is a bad idea." I shook my head before he brought his lips to mine.

  We kissed for a long time, our bodies tangled together in bed. The way he went about this time was different. His thrusts were deep and slow, he caressed every inch of my body and didn't stop kissing me. I couldn't help but feel like this was more than just sex to him. I felt uneasy, but I knew this was the last time we would be together like this. Whether it was what he wanted or not.

  Love was tailor-made for one's soulmate. I wouldn't let my own selfishness take that away from him or his mate.

  The sweltering sun heated my fur as I stood imperious in the forest. Trees of all sizes surrounded the over-sized clearing that was mostly dirt and patches of green. The smell of damp earth and wild jasmine lingered in the air. My father's wolf, whom mine was almost an exact replica of, stood tall beside me. His coal-black fur glimmered in the sunlight, and his icy eyes shone proudly.

  Our pack, along with the Alphas and Betas from around the globe, stood in human form around us, spectating. In mere seconds I would become Alpha of Maxwell Pack and I couldn't be more ready.

  My dad threw back his head, letting out his last howl as Alpha. Those in attendance bowed their heads to him. He faced me as I bared my neck, awaiting the next step of the process.

  'Are you ready?' His hardened voice rumbled through my head.

  'Yes, Father,' I replied.

  His teeth sunk into the flesh of my wolf form, and the transfer of raw Alpha power seeped into my soul. My veins pumped it through my body, as it electrocuted my very being. It took me hostage, and I reveled in the feeling.

  He unclamped his jaw from my neck. 'I am proud of you, Sophia.'

  'I won't let you down.' I shook my head as the blood from the bite began to matte my fur.

  He stepped back, shifting into human form. The sounds of his bones relocating and his fur residing back into his skin could be heard throughout the clearing. As he stood up, he acquired a robe from my mother.

  My parents stood slightly to the side of clearing. It was their duty to narrate the rest of the ceremony to the visiting werewolves since I couldn't use the mind-link with them—as they were not members of our pack.

  I stood with my chest puffed out and my head held high as I accepted my new position as Alpha.

  "I thank you all for coming to our Alpha Ceremony as I give the Maxwell Pack over to my first born—my daughter, Sophia. She will now appoint her Beta," my father announced.

  Riley stood in front of me in her wolf form. Her thick brown fur streaked with a vibrant red, and her blue eyes trained on me with reverence.

  I nodded. 'Are you ready?'

  She bared her neck to me. 'Yes.'

  I leaned in, and bit through her fur and flesh with ease. A surge of scorching energy rushed through me to her. I unclamped my jaw and pulled away, ignoring the tinge of blood remaining on my tongue. Her eyes were shining bright as she held her head up. The bond between Alpha and Beta was prominent, and the one we shared as sisters had amplified.

  'Welcome to your new position as Beta of the Maxwell Pack.'

  'Thank you, Alpha,' her voice rang out through the mind-link.

  "Riley Maxwell has been appointed as Beta by the new Alpha Sophia Maxwell." Dad clapped as the audience joined him.

  "Now, she will appoint her Gamma, Xavier Kingston."

  In his chocolate-brown wolf form, Xavier trotted in front of me with eagerness.

  'Ready?'

  'I was born ready.' His wolf bounced on his paws, adding to the excitement in his eyes.

  I nodded before transferring the power over to him as Gamma.

  "Now, my daughter's upper command of this pack is complete." Dad walked with my mom toward the end of the clearing where the rest of the pack was.

  I threw my head back and howled my first howl as Alpha. My Beta and Gamma joined in, supporting me and showing confidence in their new Alpha.

  Once the display of my power was over, I shifted into my human form with my Beta and Gamma following suit. We were immediately handed our robes. The robes were a silky white with gold intricately woven at the seams. The silk slid against my skin with ease. The elders of the pack made them exclusively for the upper-ranked pack members.

  I stood in the middle of the clearing with Riley and Xavier flanking me. "It's an honor to accept the title of Alpha from my father." I scanned the members as I spoke.

  "I'm proud to take over such a loyal and trustworthy pack. I'm also eager to lead this pack with my sister as my Beta and my best friend as my Gamma. I will not let–" My words caught in my throat as my eyes settled on a man with messy silver hair.

  He had an aura of prominence as he stared back at me with a fire in his perfect gray eyes. The air between us felt like static electricity.

  All thoughts of my speech, and the ceremony, had dissipated from my mind. My only concern was this man. He was tall and muscular. His skin tone was pale and creamy. The intense power radiated off him like a force to be reckoned with. Irrefutably, he was an Alpha—and a strong one at that. Everything about him was perfect.

  Before I knew it, he was standing directly in front of me. I could feel myself being pulled into an abyss of pure love and desire. All I cared about was this man standing within arm's reach of me.

  He uttered one word before pressing his lips to mine in a frenzy of passion, "Mate."

  I could hear audible gasps from my pack, but I didn't care. This man captivat
ed me, drowning in his very essence, and I didn't want to come up for air.

  I reacted on pure werewolf instinct. My arms wrapped around his neck as he gripped my waist and pulled me closer. Everywhere he touched tingled with the matebond.

  Our lips molded together perfectly and the craving I had for him burned deep in my core. This feeling couldn't compare to anything I had felt before.

  I couldn't get enough of it, of him.

  The sound of shredding clothes and bones popping broke us out of our trance just in time, as a smaller brown wolf launched himself at my second chance mate.

  Time decelerated as the man who enthralled me pushed me out of the way. Sparks erupted from his touch and I stumbled back into Xavier who caught me with strong arms.

  The man caught the brown wolf's snout in the palm of his hand and slammed him to the ground with force. The sound of the impact was a sickening crack. Whispers echoed around the clearing. Violence never occurred during an Alpha ceremony, or if it had, there was no record of it.

  The brown wolf whimpered from the blow, submitting immediately. I recognized the brown wolf as Nolan. Thoughts swarmed my head as to why he would attack an Alpha. His father may have been a Beta, but he wasn't. A regular wolf going against a wolf as strong as this man was suicide.

  "You're a pathetic excuse for a werewolf. You fell to one blow in a fight you initiated." The silver-haired beauty sneered at my ex-mate.

  "What the fuck is happening?" Xavier whispered in my ear. It sent a sharp pain through me. Being touched by him was physically painful now that I had a matebond forming.

  Nolan shifted back to his human form. His body shook, coughing up blood. "She's not your mate. She's mine."

  "I am not your mate. I accepted your rejection. It broke our matebond," I said, pushing myself away from Xavier and toward him.

  The thought of him trying to say, even for a second, that I was his mate made my skin crawl. He rejected me, not the other way around. He married my sister for fatesake.

  My second chance mate stalked toward me. His unfaltering gaze bore into me with an intensity that made me shiver. He came to a halt a couple inches from me. All of my anger for Nolan melted away as I stared into his eyes.