by T. N. Cole
“Michael, my man.” I fist bumped him.
“Well, well, well, here’s a mofo I haven’t seen in a while.” He chuckled.
I scratched the back of my head, trying to look sheepish. “Yeah well, I’ve had things to do.” I winked at the girl who was still standing there, blatantly eye fucking me.
Michael glanced at the girl, then looked back at me. He shook his head. “That shit never gets old, dude. You’ve seriously been standing here for two seconds. Get your ass inside.”
I shrugged. It wasn’t like I was ever trying to pick any girls up; well, not anymore at least. “Thanks, Mikey,” I said in a falsetto voice, making him roll his eyes. I handed him a twenty even though I knew he would’ve let me in for free. He clapped me on the back in appreciation then let me go in. I didn’t spare the girl another glance.
It took my eyes a few seconds to adjust to the dark. The place was packed. From all the texts I had been getting all day, I knew this was where everyone would be tonight. Great, it was going to be a bitch and a half to find Katelyn in this crowd.
Or you could not find her, Mel teased. She’s a big girl. Let her take care of herself.
I squared my shoulders and started weaving through the crowd. I spotted Alex with a few girls I recognized and decided to go over there to ask if he had seen Katelyn.
Alex spotted me when I was a few feet away. He released the girl he had under his left arm and opened his arms. “Tristan Westdyke! Glad you could grace us with your presence.” He wasn’t that drunk. Yet. The girls he was with straightened up even more when they saw me, adjusting their hair and dresses. I didn’t give a shit. I needed to find Katelyn.
I bro-hugged Alex and refused his wordless offer of beer. It had been two years since I had let myself drink. “Dude, have you seen Katelyn here?”
He raised his eyebrows, and then his grin turned smug. “So you are tapping that…”
I punched him in the arm. “No, dipshit. She just didn’t trust your sorry ass to look after her tonight, so she asked me to come.”
Alex’s eyes widened. “That’s even worse. You’re becoming pussy-whipped without the pussy!”
“Shut up. Just tell me if you’ve seen her. I think she might be alone.” I gave him a pointed look. He knew that was a bad idea.
“Shit,” he swore. “I think last I saw her, she was with that one dick, Luke. He was getting her a drink.”
Son of a bitch. Luke wasn’t that bad of a guy—he was just a douchebag who liked to get laid. A lot. Okay, so maybe he was a dick. I had no doubt that he would try something with Katelyn. “Where,” I bit out.
Alex turned and climbed up on the closest chair. He stretched his neck to see over the crowd. “There she is. Damn, she’s hot. She looks fine, unharmed. But you might want to go over there. You know, stake your claim. Go, caveman. Play knight in shining armor.” He pointed to the other side of the room toward the makeshift dance floor.
I rolled my eyes at his last couple of comments. He jumped down from the chair, and I steadied him when he stumbled a little from the beer. “Thanks, dude, I’ll catch you later,” I said. He nodded at me and then turned back to the girls he was talking to before I’d interrupted.
I waded through the crowd to get to where Alex saw Katelyn. I saw a few girls who had propositioned me once or twice in the past, and I threw fake grins at them, just to appease them. I didn’t need any drama from them, which could start with just one wrong look. Otherwise, I didn’t stop till I found Katelyn. And when I saw her, I stopped dead in my tracks.
She was still talking to Luke. She had her hair down and curled, framing her pretty little face. She still didn’t have that much makeup on, not like the other girls who caked it on for a night out. She had on a tight, black sleeveless top tucked into a gold, glittery skirt. The long, toned legs I had seen at the gym were emphasized with gold stilettos. Her top wasn’t low cut and her skirt wasn’t obscenely short. I realized this was why she was so gorgeous—she wasn’t trying to get attention. Katelyn was effortlessly beautiful. Even without all my issues, there was no way I could ever corrupt her.
I knew I couldn’t be the only one who was admiring her, and sure enough, all the guys in her vicinity were sneaking glances at her. Fuck it, none of these dickheads deserved her either. I strolled toward Katelyn. You’re playing with fire, Mel warned.
She turned her head and stopped mid-sentence, giving me a quick once-over. I tried to picture what she saw; jeans, black Henley, and a walk I worked hard to make look relaxed when I was always anything but. I wondered if she saw the dead look in my eyes I always seemed to see when I looked in the mirror.
Her smile brightened, and damn if it didn’t kill me a little on the inside. She ignored Luke and rushed to me, throwing her arms around my neck. Her heels gave her enough height to do so, but I bent a little and wrapped an arm around her slim waist to catch and support her. I was a little surprised—after all, we hadn’t even known each other for that long. Maybe she was drunk. I grimaced at the thought. I ignored the rush of warmth I felt when she hugged me. “I was afraid you weren’t coming,” Katelyn murmured in my ear.
I released her and unlocked her arms from my neck. I tipped her chin up to look into her eyes. Gorgeous. I saw relief shining in her eyes, but I could tell she was nervous as well. Her eyes were a little unfocused but that wasn't surprising. Dicks like Luke always made sure pretty girls had a red Solo cup in hand at all times. I gave her a half smile. “I would never let you come to one of these parties by yourself, Katelyn. No matter how much you annoy me.”
She grinned at me again, then seemed to remember Luke standing behind her. “Oh, do you know Luke? He’s been keeping me company while I was waiting for you.” She grasped my arm and dragged me toward him.
I nodded at Luke. “Hey, man,” he greeted—his smile clearly forced. He already knew that Katelyn sure as hell wasn’t going home with him now that I was here.
“I wanted to dance, but Luke said he wanted to finish his beer first.” Katelyn pouted a little. “So, will you dance with me?” She tightened her grip on my arm. Did she want to get away from Luke?
I groaned internally. I hated dancing. And I knew dancing with Katelyn was definitely a bad idea. But I needed to get her away from Luke.
“Actually, I think—” Luke tried to interject.
“Let’s go, Katelyn,” I cut him off and pulled her toward the dance floor. I twirled her in a quick circle on the way to make her laugh, which I knew would piss Luke off more.
Once we were in the throng of people, we paused and looked at each other. I didn’t know what was playing. I didn’t glance up to see who was watching us. I was too mesmerized by the girl standing in front of me, who was biting her lip and staring at my mouth.
Tristan, Mel snapped at me. What are you doing? Tristan!
I spun Katelyn around and gently placed my hands on her hips. She started moving her hips to the music. Then she took a step back and pressed her back firmly against my front. My grip on her tightened as my body started to follow her movements. One of her hands came to move my hand to her stomach and hold it there, and the other snaked up to hold me by the back of the neck.
I could barely hear people yelling in excitement or the music getting louder. All I could focus on was the warmth of Katelyn’s body against mine. The way her body grinded to the beat. The sweat that started to dew on her bare shoulder. The way my hard-on felt against her firm ass. She didn’t seem to mind. I pulled all her hair to one side and pushed it over her shoulder, leaning down to nuzzle her neck. Time ceased to exist. Nothing mattered except for our bodies moving together in the perfect rhythm. A bead of sweat trickled down her neck, and before I could do something stupid like lick it off…
I felt someone punch me in my arm. And then came some slaps on my back. I looked up to see Logan and some of my other friends lead some girls onto the floor. They were all grinning suggestively at me, and I knew they were thinking I was going to fuck Katelyn later. That th
ought was like a bucket of ice water. What was I doing?
Katelyn felt me stop, and she spun around to face me. I let my arms fall from her waist. I knew she could see the tension in my jaw, my closed expression, and my hardened eyes. The smile slipped from her face, and she frowned up at me. She could see that I regretted dancing with her, now that I remembered we weren’t alone. My friends’ jesting had brought me back to reality—one where I could never be close to Katelyn. Her eyes flashed with anger. She led us off the dance floor to a corner that was surprisingly not occupied by a couple making out.
“Katelyn…” I started.
“No.” She cut me off, slightly slurring from the alcohol. “Were you just dancing with me to piss Luke off?”
That line. It triggered the memory with no warning.
Mel had to be shitting me. Was she seriously dancing with Matt? The guy everyone knew to be a complete dick who proudly boasted of his conquests in the locker room.
“Tristannn,” Christy whined from her perch on my lap. She tugged on my shirt. “Tristan, take me home.” She pouted and started caressing my chest suggestively. I ignored her, my eyes locked on Matt and Mel. One wrong move, and I was taking the cocksucker out.
I watched Matt try to slip one hand under Mel’s shirt while he danced with her from behind. Mel caught his hand and moved it back to her waist. Thirty seconds later, he tried it again, and I snapped. I stood up abruptly with my fists clenched, carelessly dumping Christy on the floor and halting the conversation of my friends who were sitting around me.
“What the fuck?” Christy screeched. But I didn’t hear her. Nor did I hear any of the guys who called after me as I stomped to where Mel had now pushed Matt away.
“What’s the problem now, sweetheart?” Matt slurred.
“The problem? Maybe I don’t feel like having sex with you in front of everyone!” Mel fired at him.
Matt smirked. And then he saw me towering behind Mel, glaring at him. His grin widened at the sight of my scowl. “Well, well, well, if it isn’t Mr. Perfect here to save the day.”
“Get lost, Matt,” I snapped, my fists balling up, ready to punch the idiot’s lights out.
He saluted me with his middle finger then surprisingly walked off, swaying unsteadily.
Mel whipped around to face me. She pushed me. Hard. “What the hell was that?” She was pissed.
I bristled. “What do you mean what the hell was that? That was me saving your ass!”
“From what? I was handling myself just fine!” she responded indignantly.
“Yeah, sure looked like it,” I remarked sarcastically.
“Maybe I wanted to dance with him. Ever think of that, Tristan?”
I raised my eyebrows incredulously. “Are you kidding me right now? You were the one who shoved him off first! I was helping you get rid of that asshole!”
“Helping? No. You’re just doing that stupid caveman thing!” she shouted.
“What the hell are you talking about?”
“Guys are ridiculous! You don’t get to ignore me while sucking face with that slut monkey who was in your lap, and then go all territorial when another guy starts showing interest! Newsflash, you can’t stake a claim on someone who isn’t yours!”
“You think I’m staking my claim on you?”
“That’s exactly what it looks like, dumbass! Well, guess what? The world doesn’t revolve around you! You either have me or you don’t! You can’t have the best of both worlds.”
“Wait, so you only danced with him to get me jealous?” I sneered.
“No! Yes! I don’t fucking know. All I know is I’m tired. I’m tired of this game we’ve been playing. It’s either all or nothing now. I can’t do this with you anymore.” Mel brokenly whispered that last part.
I stopped and looked around the room. Almost everyone had stopped what they were doing to watch us argue.
“I can’t do this,” I muttered. “I’ll talk to you later.” What she was asking for was ridiculous. I needed to get the hell out of there before I said something I couldn’t take back.
“You can’t just walk away from me like this, Tristan. Tristan! Wait!” I heard her rushing after me out of the house.
Katelyn was rambling. “You know, maybe I was wrong. It’s not like you even like me. I mean, we’re not even friends—you said so yourself yesterday. Plus, I am a little drunk…”
What the fuck was that, Mel, I growled in my head.
Nothing. Now she chose to stay silent.
I was shaking. I couldn’t be having flashbacks in public. I shouldn’t have flashbacks period. I had to get out of there.
I pushed off the wall I had fallen against when the memory had hit. I had just stepped around Katelyn when her tiny hand clamped down on my forearm. I closed my eyes and exhaled through my nose before turning to face her.
“Tristan, I’m sorry. Don’t leave me here, please,” she whimpered. “I’ll back off, I promise. Will you just stay? With me?”
We locked eyes. Her pleading turned to confusion when she saw the turmoil and pain so clearly on my face.
“Tristan?” she asked uncertainly. “What’s happening? What’s wrong?”
“I have to get out of here,” I bit out. However, I knew I couldn’t leave her here by herself. I’d just have to take her with me. “Let’s go.”
Before she could protest, I grabbed her hand—ignoring the warmth emanating from the contact of our skin—and began shoving through the crowd to the back entrance of the Kappa Sig house. To her credit, Katelyn just stuck close behind me and followed. It got a little tricky when we got outside.
“Tristan? I don’t feel so good,” Katelyn muttered.
I ground my teeth in frustration. She must have had more beer than I thought. I felt like a ticking time bomb, and I didn’t know what would happen when the timer reached zero. “Throw up now, if you need to. Don’t throw up in my car. I’m taking you home.”
“Home?” That seemed to snap her out of her queasiness. “Why are you taking me home? I want to stay with you,” she insisted.
Instead of answering, I turned and started toward the car again. I heard shoes clatter to the ground behind me. I stopped and looked behind me to see Katelyn crouching awkwardly to pick up the heels she had kicked off her feet without letting her skirt riding up. She straightened up. “I can’t keep up with you on these things,” she said defensively.
I didn’t want her walking barefoot, so I closed the gap between us and quickly bent to carry her by supporting her behind her knees and across her back. She yelped in surprise and closed her eyes. When she opened them, she glared at me. “Caveman.”
I almost stumbled as my mind fought to push back the memory again.
It was cold and raining outside, but the cold was a welcome slap in the face. I couldn’t have Mel. She was too…perfect. I didn’t need to fuck her up more than I already had. It was bad enough that we were best friends, which already exposed too much of my sorry life to her.
I could have taken my car and driven somewhere. That probably would have prevented the whole tragedy from happening. But, no, I had to be dramatic and blindly walk in the middle of the night toward who knows what.
I didn’t know Mel would follow me through the freezing rain. But I should have. That girl was tenacious.
“Tristan…” Katelyn hesitantly placed her hand on my cheek. “Concentrate. Where did you park your car?”
I stopped and glanced around. Shit, I had already passed it. I paced back three cars and let Katelyn down so I could unlock the car and open the passenger door for her.
She slid into the car, and I closed the door before moving to the other side to get in the driver’s seat.
“WHERE DO YOU LIVE?” I asked her, as I pulled out onto the street. I needed to be alone if these memories were going to bombard me. She had already seen too much. I didn’t want her to take pity on me. I didn’t deserve anyone’s pity.
“I’m not telling you. I’m going with you,” Kat
elyn fired back.
I looked at her incredulously. “The hell you are! Tell me where you live, so I can drop you off. I can’t deal with you tonight, Katelyn. So help me—”
“So help you what? What are you going to do? Drop me off on the side of the road in the middle of the night? Go for it.” She crossed her arms over her chest.
I snapped and pressed my foot harder on the gas pedal¸ entering the freeway. I wasn’t taking her to my place. The last thing I needed was for her to know where I lived. She was acting a little mentally unstable, insisting on staying with me when I was clearly hanging on to my sanity by a thread. Ha! Maybe she was the normal one then, and I was the crazy one. Actually, I knew I was the crazy one, which was why I needed to get the hell away from her and self-combust in peace.
I glanced sideways at her to see that she was already turned in her seat and studying me. She wasn’t even concerned that I was nearing 100 mph at this point. I quickly glanced away, avoiding eye contact so she couldn’t see that my eyes were swimming in the guilt of my memories.
I randomly took the next exit. I had no idea where we were by this point, but I kept taking turns. Right. Left. Left. Right. Suddenly, we were on a gravel road. “Where are we?” Katelyn asked softly.
“Not so confident in your plan to stay with me now, are you? No one can hear you scream out here,” I replied snidely.
She rolled her eyes. This girl has no sense of self-preservation, I thought.
“Tell me, do you often get in cars with guys you don’t know and let them drive you wherever they want? Or am I just getting lucky tonight?” I taunted. I was treating her like shit—I knew I was. But I needed a distraction before I broke down in front of her like a freaking pussy.
“You’re a dick,” she replied. “I’m not a slut, if that’s what you’re implying.”
“Actions speak louder than words, that’s all I’m saying,” I smirked.
“What the hell is—” Katelyn stopped when we saw where we had arrived. Stonebridge Lake was illuminated in moonlight. Even I didn’t know what to say anymore. I let the car roll to a stop.