by Holly Bush
“You act as though your sister doesn’t deserve a marriage. Would you rather her be alone with a child and a reputation that she doesn’t deserve?”
Jim shook his head. “No. If anyone deserves happiness, it’s Emmaline. But she is . . . she is different.”
“We’re all different,” he said. “I believe that Emmaline and I will get along. I think we’ll be good partners, and isn’t that what marriage is all about?”
“This situation has changed her, has diminished her, in her own eyes, I believe. I’ve known for months that something wasn’t right for her, but I had no idea what it was. If she recovers herself after this child is born, she will challenge you in every conceivable way. She doesn’t suffer fools and will talk about nearly any subject and give her opinion.” He stared at Adam. “I will not tolerate her unhappiness. I would gladly insert myself between you and her even if it is not legal or right in the eyes of the law or the church and could cause discord between our families. She isn’t an object to be pitied.”
“I didn’t make you suffer through a lecture such as this when you were dallying with Olivia,” he said and arched a brow. “I’ve known you all of my life and knew that you were an honorable man, albeit a stupid one, when it came to her. Are you implying that I would conduct myself in a dishonorable way? That I would be a tyrant? A bully?”
“I don’t believe so,” Jim said evenly. “I believe you will act the gentleman because you are one. But I also believe that you’re doing this because you perceive you can fix this, whereas you’ll never bring Miss Wright back from the dead.”
Adam crossed the room in a few quick steps and got within inches of Jim’s face and snarled. “Do not attempt to diagnose me. I have made an honorable offer of marriage to your sister and I believe you should be happy for the both of us. And don’t ever, ever speak my Josephine’s . . .”
Jim stared at him until he looked away. Adam took a deep breath. My Josephine? She was dead and gone from all of this earth except perhaps from his heart and mind. Emmaline could never replace her but that didn’t mean he couldn’t be a good husband to her. He looked up at Jim and spoke quietly.
“I’ve discussed the fact that I am not in a position to offer love to her nor will I ever be. I told her, and I will tell you, I offer my protection, my name, and my honor. She understands what I am capable of. I intend to care for her and all of our children, including the one she carries now. She will be well looked after.”
Jim smiled a bit then. “I’m sure you’ll do as you say. It remains to be seen if Emmaline allows it.”
Adam stepped back as the door to the main room opened and his mother and sister stepped inside. Olivia went to her husband and flashed Adam a curious look.
“I hear you have invited Matt and Annie and the children for dinner and that you will have a guest, too,” Eleanor said and walked up to him, looking at him with her beatific smile and her warm and loving eyes. “How wonderful, Adam.”
“You’ve invited someone to dinner?” Olivia asked.
“I have. Will you sit with me for a moment? Mother? Livie?”
He seated himself across from them and leaned forward, his forearms resting on his legs. “I have asked Emmaline Somerset to marry me and she has accepted. She’ll be joining us for dinner.”
His mother jumped from her seat, and he rose. She looked at him with glistening eyes and hugged him and kissed his cheek. She held him tightly and whispered, “You are every bit the man that your father intended you to be and more. I could not be more proud of you.” She turned to Olivia and Jim and smiled. “What a joyous day! We will have a new family member and I will have a new grandchild to spoil!”
Livie was staring at him, her hands over her mouth, tears in her eyes. “Oh Adam! Adam!” She launched herself at him, “I’ve been so worried about her and so worried about you. Is this the right thing for both of you? You know I love you dearly.”
He held her close to him and kissed the top of her head. “I believe it’s the right thing. I think we’ll suit very well.”
Olivia started to say something and stopped. She kissed his cheek instead and turned to her husband. “And what were you two discussing when mother and I came into the room?”
Jim cleared his throat and stared at him. “I was congratulating your brother. He’s a good and honorable man. My sister is fortunate, and so is Adam.”
“That’s not exactly what you were saying but close enough,” Adam said and stared back. He turned to Olivia. “I’ve got to get back to town. I told Emmaline I’d pick her up at four. I thought we could gather together, just our family, before Mrs. Somerset and Mother plan something more extravagant.”
CHAPTER 4
“I will not, and I am saying this for the last time, I will not have a double wedding with Betsy and Edwin.”
“But it would be so lovely,” Louise Somerset said to her daughters.
“I have to agree with Emmaline, Mother,” Nettie said. “Betsy wants something elaborate and wants some time to plan and I don’t think that would suit Emmaline.”
Emmaline looked at her mother. “Even if I wasn’t expecting a child, and was marrying just because, well, I can’t fathom any good reason right now, I wouldn’t want ribbons and bows and fuss and all the whatnot.”
“What do you mean there’s no good reason to marry?” Louise said. “Of course, there is good reason. Every woman wants love, and children, and a family to raise and comfort her when she is old. Why else would you be marrying Adam?”
All of her sisters were looking down at their hands, even Jane, who often mended fences among the family. Emmaline was not. She was staring at her mother and wondering how she’d been born of this woman. “Mother. I am having a baby. I’m unmarried. That is the only reason that Adam asked and the only reason I said yes.”
“Must you take all of the romance and hope out of this?” her mother asked, red-faced, as she twisted her handkerchief.
“There is no romance. Adam is still grieving over the loss of a woman he loved, and I am an unmarried pregnant woman from a family he is related to and has known all of his life who he can offer help to. Don’t make this to be something it’s not.”
“But it could be,” her mother said and dabbed her eyes. “Jane. You should not be here listening to all of this talk.”
“Jennifer Wyland is going to be married this summer. She’s the same age as me,” Jane said.
“You are far too young to be thinking about marriage,” Louise said.
“I’m not thinking about marriage, but I am not too young to hear about it, do you think, Mother? I understand it’s a serious subject,” Jane pleaded.
“As far as romance goes, you have managed to land the most elusive and charismatic and handsome man in Winchester. Think about it,” Nettie said and made a disgusted face. “What if he was some spindly, balding man missing his teeth.” She shivered.
“Nettie! A person’s looks do not make his character. Adam Gentry is a gentleman through and through regardless of his looks or lack of them,” their mother said.
“Well, I say it’s better to crawl in bed every night of your life with Adam instead of Jerimiah Finch.”
Jane blushed, Betsy laughed, and their mother shouted her reprimand even as she walked out of the room and declared her head was pounding so much that she must lie down. Jane hurried after her mother and offered to brew some willow bark tea to help her relax. Nettie and Betsy followed Emmaline to her room while she changed her dress to go to the Gentry’s for dinner.
“What did he say, Emmaline?” Nettie said as soon as she closed the door on Emmaline’s bedroom.
Emmaline shrugged and pulled her dress over her head. “He told me about the woman he was going to marry, that he loved, and then he just asked me.”
“That was all he said? Nothing else?” Betsy asked.
“He said he could never love me but that he wants children and needs to marry to have them.”
Nettie sat down on the bed. �
��Do you want to marry him? Have his children?”
Emmaline plopped down onto the stool in front of her vanity and looked at herself in the mirror. “I suppose,” she said. “But I can’t think of that or anything that comes after that until this child is born.”
“John and I made love up until my eighth month with both children. John asked the doctor and he said it was fine. I can’t believe he asked him, though. I would have been mortified. What?” she said to the shocked faces of her sisters.
“I don’t want to know about this! Good Lord! Why would you tell us?” Emmaline asked.
Nettie shrugged. “It’s part of marriage. You’re both going to be married soon. It’s not like you won’t be having relations with Edwin, Betsy. I’ve seen how you look at him.”
Betsy blushed “When he kisses me, I can hardly think straight,” she said and then whispered, “And then I think about taking my clothes off. Am I terribly wicked? Am I going to Hades?”
Nettie laughed. “Of course, you’re not going to Hades! There would be no children on this earth if women did not take off at least some part of their clothing. Has mother told you what is going to happen?”
“I didn’t quite understand what she meant.”
“Did she talk about noodles?” Nettie asked, and Betsy nodded. “Thank God John explained the particulars to me before we married.” She looked out the window and sighed. “Hearing him talk about it was quite invigorating.”
“Edwin stutters so when he asks to kiss me that I hate to pepper him with questions,” Betsy said.
Nettie sat up on the bed. “Lock the door, Betsy. Here’s the thing. Mother’s description isn’t quite right. You know boys have something between their legs.”
Betsy gulped. “Yes. I mean I remember bathing Phillip.”
“John said that all men have different sizes of them, just like women have different size bosoms. When a man gets aroused because you’re kissing or he’s touching you or you’re touching him, his,” Nettie said and swirled her hand below her waist, “gets large and stiff and it goes between your legs and inside you. That is how a baby is made. At least now one of you will know what to do, Betsy.”
“It’s called a penis, Nettie,” Emmaline said as she brushed her hair.
“I’m going to die,” Betsy said. “That is a dreadful word.”
“Where did you hear that word, Emmaline?” Nettie asked.
She shrugged. “Jim has some books, scientific ones and ones from the Far East that talk about it. There are even pictures.”
“Jim?” Betsy gasped.
“Where are they?” Nettie asked.
“They were in his rooms behind the forge in a locked trunk under his bed, but they’re gone. He must have taken them to Paradise when he and Olivia married.”
“What happened?” Nettie asked.
“I was changing the sheets on his bed and saw the trunk. He must have forgot to lock it because every other time I was alone in his room it was locked.”
“I don’t mean the books, Emmaline,” Nettie whispered. “I mean what happened in Brunsville?”
The room was completely silent other than the patter of Emmaline’s heart in her ears. She stared at her hands and thought back to that night and to the man, no, that boy who’d planted this child in her. He’d been clever and funny and had danced with her twice. What a fool she was!
“Was it that Henry person? Carter’s cousin?” Nettie asked.
She turned in her seat. “I’m not going to talk about it. Ever. So, there is no use asking me.”
“It’s just that I feel so guilty,” Nettie said and swiped her hand across her eyes. “You were with John and I that night. After you told us that you were expecting, John wanted to get Jim and Matt and ride to Brunsville and . . . I’ve barely been able to keep him from sharing his suspicions with them.”
“We are not going to discuss this, and you have no reason to feel guilty. In any case, Adam has said from the moment of our marriage this child will be his. There’ll be no more questions because he or she is Adam’s and my child.”
“He said that?” Betsy asked.
“He did. Without hesitation.”
“He is a romantic, then, even if you are not.” Nettie walked over to the dressing table to drop a kiss on her sister’s head. “Come along, Betsy. Emmaline needs to get dressed.”
“DID you decide anything about a wedding date or details?” Adam asked as they rode to Paradise in the Gentry gig.
She shook her head. “My sister Betsy recently became engaged to Edwin Crawper. My mother wants us to have a double wedding with them. I told her we were not going to do that.”
“Olivia mentioned their engagement. I can’t say I’m sorry you decided against a double wedding. I already feel like an old man, and your sister is younger than you yet and I don’t think Edwin Crawper is much older.”
“I’d prefer we had the ceremony at home or at Paradise with just our families. What would you like to do?” she asked.
“Whatever suits you is fine with me, but I don’t want anyone to get the idea that there is any shame in this marriage because there isn’t. I don’t want anyone thinking we’re hiding away.”
Emmaline looked at his profile. His hat was pushed back on his head and his hair hung in curls around his neck. He still had on the same clothes as when he’d proposed. His face was shadowed with a dark beard. Adam Gentry would be concerned with what others thought but then he was marrying a woman carrying another man’s child. He couldn’t be that concerned. He turned to her then.
“Although in a town this small, folks are going to speculate and guess and gossip. We’re not going to pay any attention to them. But I was thinking we’d set the date for next Saturday. Olivia said that your sister is marrying in May and it would be good if there was any talk it had died down by then. We don’t want to overshadow her wedding with questions or comments.”
“If there is any talk?” she asked and took a deep breath.
He harrumphed. “Did you and your sisters and mother decide on anything else? A dress for you? Flowers? Did you talk about any of that?”
They were pulling up outside the Gentry home and Emmaline thought about seeing Olivia and Jim, Jim especially, and talking to Mrs. Gentry, and Matt and his wife. She liked the Gentrys, all of them, but she wasn’t quite sure how she’d fit in. She never fit in at home, she thought to herself, why would she fit in here?
“We talked about penises actually,” she said.
He turned to her with a start as he pulled the horse to stop. A young boy came up from the stables and took the reins from his hand. Adam closed his mouth and climbed down, coming around the gig to help her down.
“I’m sorry. What did you say? I don’t think I heard you,” he said.
She put her hand in his and stepped down to the ground. Emmaline looked up at him. “We talked about penises.” She saw Mrs. Gentry in the doorway. “Best get this over with.”
“Mrs. Gentry,” Emmaline said and put out her hand after she went up the slate walkway. She didn’t know whether to laugh, or cry, or hurry home and curl up in a ball under her covers. It was one thing to say yes to Adam in the privacy of her bedroom. This public reckoning would be much more difficult she imagined, and she couldn’t begin to guess his family’s reaction.
“Emmaline, dear! Please call me Eleanor or mother if you’d like. Annie does, but then her mother has passed on to her reward and your mother is still near and dear to you.” She pulled Emmaline in for a swaying hug and a soft kiss on the cheek.
Emmaline held her arms at her sides, but eventually patted Mrs. Gentry’s back. “I’ll call you Eleanor, then,” she said as they stepped apart.
The woman slipped an arm through hers to guide her inside as if she’d not been to Paradise many times before. “How are you feeling, Emmaline? Would you like to lie down before dinner? I won’t have Adam overtax you.”
“I’ll be fine, ma’am.”
“Here is the bride!” Elea
nor said then when they walked into the large room that was the original part of the house when she and Mr. Gentry were first married.
The first face she saw was her brother Jim’s. He was the tallest person, the biggest person, and he was standing a bit apart from everyone else near the window. She imagined he’d watched Adam hand her down from the gig and follow her inside. It took every bit of her discipline to not run to him and let him hold her and carry her home. He’d been her rock since she was a child and the head of the family since her father’s death. He would save her. But did she need saving?
Annie hugged her and held her hands. “I’ve told Teddy and Ruth that they have a new aunt. They’re very excited, although Teddy doesn’t want you to take his uncle Adam away,” she said smiling.
“I’ve no intentions of taking him anywhere,” she said, and Annie chuckled.
Olivia pulled her away and hugged her tightly. “Everything will work out for the best. Adam is such a fine man, but of course, he is my brother and I’m overly partial. But I think perhaps you two were meant to be together.”
“I think we’re going to be together because I’m expecting a child and not married, and he is mourning a woman he loved.”
The room went silent for a moment with some awkward shuffling of feet and forced smiles all around. She’d been quiet for the last three months or so since she’d known for certain that she was with child, struck dumb perhaps, in the biblical sense, but she’d found her voice, the one that her mother said was the reason she wasn’t often asked to step out with a young man or join a group of women in some pursuit, other than Olivia and Nettie and Marabelle. But then why gloss over the truth?
Adam walked to her. He picked up her hand from her side and held it. “Very true, Emmaline. But that doesn’t mean we’re not going to have a long and happy life together. I believe we will.”
She swallowed, knowing she’d made everyone in the room feel uncomfortable and deflated. She didn’t mean to. She really didn’t. He was looking at her kindly even though she’d said penis in front of him and described their upcoming marriage in the rawest terms possible. He’d told her, though, he didn’t judge her for just a sliver of her life. She felt the damnable tears again.