Winds of Change

by Anna Jacobs

  It was good, though, that the Queen had named the town Royal Wootton Bassett, only the third town ever to receive that honour; not good that the repatriations were going elsewhere.

  Being a soldier’s wife was beginning to get to her, Katie knew. If she hadn’t had Ned to look after, she didn’t know what she’d have done.

  Books were lifesavers too. She’d never read so much in her whole life, mostly romances or cheerful chick-lit that was guaranteed a happy ending. They helped her feel better, somehow. She wasn’t reading anything miserable or heavy until Darren came back safely.

  And now she had a new father to deal with, a man sparing with words, who didn’t usually let his emotions show, but who’d been there for her when Ned was rushed to hospital. That meant a lot.

  She did hope Mum wouldn’t come up from Cornwall to see Ned and check up on them, which she did periodically. It might damage Katie’s growing relationship with Brody because Mum wasn’t noted for her tact and excelled at putting her foot in it big time. It was a good thing Sam, her mother’s new husband, found that amusing. Other people got upset. Katie smiled at the thought of Sam. He was such a nice guy. He’d taken a lot of the emotional load of keeping her mother cheerful off her.

  And now, to top it all, her birth mother was going to be in England. She couldn’t refuse to see a woman who was coming all the way from Australia to see her. But from the way Brody talked about the woman, she didn’t sound trustworthy in relationships.

  And anyway, Katie wasn’t sure she could forgive her for giving her baby away. Her father said he’d not been consulted, which amazed her. He said he’d explain about her mother’s family another time.

  But how could you form a relationship with someone who’d given you away? She had a child of her own now and if anyone tried to take Ned away from her or hurt him, she knew she’d fight tooth and nail. Whatever it took.

  The traffic lights were all green, so Brody got to the hospital before Katie that evening.

  Ned was sprawled on the bed scowling at a book. He said a grudging hello to his grandfather.

  ‘Something wrong?’

  ‘This one’s too hard for me. But it’s got dinosaurs in it.’ The child’s face brightened. ‘Can you read it to me?’

  ‘Sure.’ Brody found he had to keep stopping to discuss the illustrations and listen to Ned’s views on dinosaurs.

  Katie came rushing in late, with only fifteen minutes left before visitors were chucked out. ‘Sorry. I was at work and got held up in the traffic.’ She hugged Ned, hesitated, then planted a quick air kiss near Brody’s left ear.

  As they were walking out of the hospital together, he risked it. ‘Would you like to have dinner somewhere?’

  Her response was instantaneous. ‘I’d love to. The house seems empty without Ned. If his temperature stays down, he can come home tomorrow. I’ll have to phone you and let you know.’

  ‘What sort of food?’

  ‘I don’t mind.’

  ‘I know a nice little Indian restaurant.’

  ‘Great. Let’s go.’

  It wasn’t far and once they were settled at their table, he asked something he’d been wondering about. ‘What’s your husband like?’

  ‘Tall, dark but not handsome. He has lovely twinkly eyes, though.’

  Brody managed to keep the conversation going by asking about her life, then she began fiddling with the edge of her plate and shooting him worried glances. ‘Is something wrong?’

  ‘Yeah. Well, not wrong. It’s just . . . my birth mother’s been in touch. Or rather her representative has. She’s coming to England to meet me. Why can’t she email me herself? Why is someone else doing that?’

  ‘Miranda’s coming here? I didn’t think her family would let her off the leash for long enough.’

  She looked at him in surprise.

  ‘Sorry. I shouldn’t say things like that.’

  ‘You sound as if you hate her sometimes.’

  He picked up his wine glass and took a sip. ‘I didn’t mean to. I just . . . hate what she and her family did to me.’

  ‘What’s she like?’

  ‘I’ve not seen her for twenty-six years. She’ll be forty-seven.’ He paused, unable to imagine Miranda looking old. Had she put on weight? Was her hair grey? Did she wear glasses now?

  ‘What was she like when you were together?’

  ‘Small, fair-haired, old-fashioned in many ways. I used to tease her about that. It came of having such an elderly father, I suppose. James Fox should have been born in the nineteenth century. I’m sure he didn’t believe in votes for women!’

  Katie laughed. ‘She’ll probably have grey hair now. Mum dyes her hair because it’s gone sort of iron grey and she hates that. But she’s older than this Miranda. Mum’s sixty now. She says she doesn’t feel old and gets mad if I tease her about it even. You’re forty-seven as well, aren’t you? Do you feel old?’

  He looked at her in surprise. ‘Old? I’m not old. I suppose I must seem old to you, but I don’t feel it inside.’

  ‘How did you and my mother meet?’

  ‘We met at university. We were in the same year. She was studying English and I was doing IT, which was less common then. Miranda was living at home. My family were in the country, so I was a bit lonely, I suppose. She was lonely because she was shy and didn’t know how to mix.’

  ‘Did you fall in love with her straight away?’

  He’d forgotten how he’d felt about Miranda because the anger had taken over once the family had closed ranks on him and kept him away from her. ‘I suppose I did. Well, quite quickly, anyway.’

  He changed the subject, didn’t want to remember those days and the pain of losing Miranda – losing his unborn child, too. Why had she taken everything away from him? She’d not only stopped loving him but had caved in to her family about having the baby adopted.

  The only possible conclusion to draw was that she couldn’t have loved him, not in the way he’d loved her, anyway. Or maybe she was just a coward, unable to stand up to people. How could he have been so mistaken in a person? It was a question he’d asked himself many times over the years because, whatever he did, he’d never been able to forget her and the few short months they’d been together.

  That was what had ruined his marriage. But at least he saw his son regularly and was on reasonable terms with his ex.

  He wasn’t on any sort of terms with his first love.

  Miranda hired a car for a week. Surely in that time she’d be able to buy a vehicle of her own?

  She sat behind the wheel, deeply relieved that the car had a satellite navigation system because she hadn’t had time to study the map of England in detail. Now all that remained was to decide where to go and program in her destination.

  Should she go straight to her sister’s? She was fairly certain Regina would put her up for a night or two. But she was afraid Regina would tell Sebastian where she was, afraid he’d find some way to get to her.

  And most of all, she was afraid of not managing, not standing on her own feet.

  There was a folder of brochures on the seat beside her. She flicked through them, wondering what they were about. To her relief, a couple were from hotel chains, offering accommodation at what seemed a reasonable price. She looked at the map and found one in Wiltshire, in a town called Swindon.

  The instructions for using the satellite navigation system were clear and she programmed in the postcode of the hotel she had chosen. A woman’s voice, sounding very upper-class English, told her to take the first left.

  Taking a deep breath she drove out of the parking area, waving back to the cheery attendant. Cars whizzed past her, all seeming intent on breaking the speed limit. She’d been driving for years, but suddenly she felt like a learner. Was it her imagination or did people drive more quickly here in the UK?

  She could only hope that the satellite navigation system knew where it was going because she didn’t. Cars, roads, junctions, motorways loomed at her in quic
k succession. They were well signposted but what saved her from panicking was the pleasant-sounding electronic voice guiding her.

  The motorways were absolutely crowded and traffic was slow at first. She didn’t mind that. It gave her time to get used to the car. When she saw a sign for Services, she turned off and found her way into a crowded car park. She sat over a large cup of coffee and a croissant, watching people, something she often did, quite used to being on her own.

  The caffeine perked her up and she made her way out to the car again, feeling quite proud of herself. She could do this.

  By the time she got to the hotel, she was so exhausted she was worried her driving might be affected. She hired a room and took her luggage up, staring round it and pulling a face. Why did so many hotels choose neutral colour schemes? Still, the room had everything you really needed and there was a café where she could get meals.

  She sat on the bed, wondering what to do next? She was too tired to drive anywhere, didn’t want to ring Regina yet.

  In the end she gave in to her sleepiness and lay down on the bed.

  She woke five hours later in mid-afternoon, furious with herself for sleeping so long. Not stopping to unpack, she grabbed her handbag and went down to the café for a snack. She managed to chat to the waitress, who was happy to tell her where to go to do some shopping.

  Only when she got out of the hotel grounds, she found the directions didn’t work. Lost, she had to stop to ask directions and program her satnav.

  In the end she got herself to a big shopping centre and bought herself something to read and a couple of casual tops, plus new jeans. The clothes Lou had bought her were too smart for everyday use – well, too smart for her. Prices seemed very reasonable and she had plenty of choice. She also bought some fruit and snack food.

  Then, feeling very happy with her purchases, she made her way back to the car, to stare in dismay at a smashed window and the space where the satnav had been fixed to the bottom of the windscreen.

  A woman came to the car next to hers. ‘Oh, dear! I don’t know what the world’s coming to when you can’t even leave your car here in safety. Lost much?’

  ‘Just the satnav system.’

  ‘They’re always after those. You’ll have to ring the police.’

  ‘I can’t. I’ve only just arrived in England from Australia and I don’t have a mobile phone yet.’

  By this time a man had joined them. He thrust a mobile at her. ‘Here. Use mine, love. Dial 999.’

  She held back tears only with an effort. ‘Thank you. You’re very kind.’

  It was two hours before the police let her go and she then had to wait for the car rental firm to bring her another car and help her program this new satnav system with her hotel, because without that, she had no idea how to get back.

  She was way beyond tears by the time she entered her room, unplugging the satnav system and taking it inside with her this time. She dumped her shopping and went down to the café, ordering a glass of white wine first and then, almost as an afterthought, a proper meal.

  First day in England and she’d already been robbed. Fine start that was. What would her family say?

  It wasn’t till she’d taken a sip of her second glass of wine that she realized that, even so, she’d coped with the emergency. She hadn’t panicked or fallen to pieces. She’d done what was necessary and got a new car to drive.

  That was good, wasn’t it? Yes, of course it was. She raised her glass in a toast to herself.

  But she wished she wasn’t on her own. She envied the couples sitting chatting, smiling sometimes, touching one another without realizing it.

  Oh, she was being stupid, wishing for the moon. Get on with it! she told herself. She finished her wine and went to her room. She’d go car hunting tomorrow morning.

  Then what? Her daughter? Was she ready to face Katie? Not yet, no. Definitely not.

  Fourteen

  When Regina picked up the phone at work, it was her daughter.

  ‘I won’t keep you a minute, Mum. Just wanted to know how Auntie Min was. I’m really looking forward to catching up with her tonight.’

  ‘I don’t know how she is, I’m afraid. There was an accident on the M4 and by the time I’d got to Heathrow the passengers had disembarked. She didn’t know I was coming so she didn’t wait around.’

  ‘Oh, no! You mean she’s all on her own in a strange country? Poor Auntie Min?’

  ‘I’m afraid so. And if she has a mobile for use here, I don’t know her number, so I’ve no way of getting in touch with her. I don’t know why she hasn’t rung me, though.’ After a short silence she changed the subject. ‘Do you and Tim still want to come to tea tonight?’

  ‘If you don’t mind.’

  ‘If I minded, I’d not have asked you.’

  Silence and a sniffle.

  ‘I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have spoken sharply.’

  ‘I’m sorry too. I cry for nothing these days. It’s not much fun being pregnant, is it?’

  ‘No.’

  ‘How on earth did you cope on your own?’

  ‘I coped because I had to.’

  Another silence, then, ‘I have to go now, Mum. Another test to do.’

  Regina stared at the phone after her daughter rang off. She kept forgetting how fragile Nikki must be feeling. What on earth was she going to do about her daughter? She wasn’t going to look after another baby, or have her life upset by one coming to live with her, but she didn’t want to leave Nikki in such a horrible slum, either.

  Only, there was Tim to think about too. His parents were moving north soon and he’d be on his own as well. Nikki might not want to marry him, but she’d not want to hurt him, either, by moving out to a place on her own.

  Regina frowned. She could use some of her father’s money to buy a small flat or house for her daughter to live in. She’d earmarked it for a retirement fund, which was a boring thing to do with a windfall like that, but once an accountant always an accountant. It’d be sensible to make sure she was financially secure when she got older. After all, she had only herself to rely on.

  She’d been wrestling with this problem of how to use her inheritance ever since she got back from Australia. It must be wonderful to have someone to share your problems and toss ideas around with. She’d never been that fortunate. But she’d coped, and coped well, too, if she did say so herself.

  Miranda woke at two o’clock in the morning, wide awake, because it would be early morning in Australia. She had trouble getting back to sleep and hoped her internal clock would adjust to the northern hemisphere more quickly.

  Should she call Regina? she wondered, quailing at the thought of what she had to do today. No. No, she was going to do this on her own. Had to, if she was to regain her self-respect.

  After she’d finished breakfast she questioned the hotel’s concierge about where to go to look at cars, and with his help found some postcodes to enter into her satnav system. It seemed as if everything went by postcode here.

  She visited four car yards and could find nothing she felt certain of, though several cars she’d looked at would do at a pinch. She didn’t particularly take to the salesmen, though, so didn’t trust them not to palm off a lemon on her. What did she know about English cars?

  She wasn’t going to try anywhere else because jetlag had kicked in again and was making her feel dopey, but as she turned a corner she found another car yard straight in front of her, a smaller one, so pulled over to the side of the road. It’d be stupid to drive past. She might not find it again

  This time the salesman was less pushy and more understanding of her problems.

  He laughed at her when she said she’d only driven automatics because hardly anyone in Australia bought manual gear changes any more.

  ‘No fun having the car do it all for you,’ he teased.

  ‘I’m happy to leave it to the car. I’ll have enough trouble dealing with the crowded roads here. People drive faster than in my part of Australia.
Um . . . where do I find the rules for driving?’

  ‘I’ll give you a copy of the Highway Code, whether you buy a car or not. From what I’ve heard, it’s not that different from the Australian one. And of course you can find it on line, once you get a computer connection.’

  He steered her towards a Renault Modus and gave it an affectionate pat. ‘This one might suit you nicely. It’s automatic and has air conditioning. Some people say you don’t need air with our climate, but park your car in the sun and you’ll soon find how useful it is. Here. Sit in it. Because they’re higher than a normal car, they’re easier to get in and out of. I bought one for my wife, who’s got a bad back. She loves it.’

  She slid into the car and found it very comfortable. ‘Can I have a drive?’

  ‘Sure.’ He fumbled in his pocket and fitted the key for her. ‘I’ll sit beside you since you don’t know the town. My name’s Don, by the way.’

  ‘Mine’s Miranda.’

  ‘Nice name.’

  ‘Do you think so? I’ve always hated it.’

  ‘You should be proud of a pretty name like that.’

  Which was a different and more positive way of thinking about it, at least. ‘Can you take me somewhere that isn’t narrow and crowded?’

  Half an hour later she signed the papers to buy the car and gave him a small deposit by credit card. ‘Now I have to find a bank and open a UK account.’

  Don grinned and pointed across the road. ‘Couldn’t be more convenient, eh? You can have the car as soon as the money comes through.’

  She felt pleased with herself for sorting out a car so quickly.

  It took over half an hour to arrange for her bank account to be transferred and she paid extra to have her money sorted out quickly. She went back to give the news to Don.

  ‘It must be hard,’ he said suddenly.

  ‘What?’

  ‘Coming to a new country on your own.’

  She made a non-committal noise. It would have been harder to stay in Australia but she wasn’t going to tell people about Sebastian. As far as she was concerned, he was out of her life for good.