My Life Would Suck Without You

by Krystal George

  *I rode a donkey (Again see photos)

  I miss you too. My parents are adamant that this is good for me. Joey fits right in here with his olive skin. I stick out like a sore thumb with my pasty white skin. My 10pm curfew has turned into ‘you go straight to school and come straight home". I'm hoping it will lighten up once he sees that not everyone is looking to kidnap an average 5'2" brown haired white girl here. They have much better options.

  I can't believe they are doing so well! But now I'm worried that I was the weak link. No, that's not it. I rocked that team.

  Look at you nailing that basket toss.

  Quiet Melissa? I can't believe that. Then again its always the quiet ones you gave to look out for.

  I would seriously cut off my left nut to see Carla have her extensions ripped out in any fashion. Like cut it off with a rusty knife.

  XOXO

  Annie

  From: Jude

  Subject: Long time no talk

  To: Annie

  I hope you don't mind that Nik gave me your address. If it helps her out any, I sort of cornered her in the hall and made her. I just wanted to write to you and see how you were doing. I'm doing good. I think I may get a scholarship to UNC for Baseball. A recruiter has been to a lot of my practices and talking to coach. I think I've got a good shot at it.

  How is school going for you? Are you going to look into colleges there? Or are you going to come home? I miss you Anns. I really do.

  Well, I guess I'll talk to you later.

  Jude

  From: Annie

  Subject: Its only been 9 weeks

  To: Jude

  That's great that you might get a scholarship. You deserve it, you're a really good ball player.

  I haven't given college much of a thought. My parents are here for at least 2 years after I graduate. If I did come back for college I would pretty much be on my own, but if I stay here, well then… I would still be on my own sort of. I have some time to think about it, right?

  School is going ok. They don't have ROTC here, so I've been spending most of my free time helping out part time at the fishing docks.

  I miss you too, Jude.

  Talk to you soon,

  Annie

  From: Nikki

  Subject: MURDERER

  To: Annie

  You caught a fish? You didn't touch it did you? Or eat? You let it go right? Fish killer. I'm just jerking your chain.

  Want to know a secret? Jude strutted the halls like he won the lottery after he got your email. I'm not saying, I'm just saying that the boy has it bad for you. But for real. He was pretty beat up for a while.

  I've been working on my mom to come see you this summer, it's not going to well though.. She watched Hostel and is paranoid now. I think your dad may have planted ideas in her head.

  I'll keep trying.

  XOXO,

  Nikki

  From: Annie

  Subject: Newest recipient of the Aquatic Pardon

  To: Nikki

  I had to let it go, he had sad eyes.

  I did write him back. I also think someone (meaning you) are exaggerating a little. We only dated for a 5 months. I think mostly his ego is hurt. I mean mine would be too, if my sorta girlfriend disappeared after a new year party.

  He might get a scholarship to UNC. He's really excited about it.

  He also brought up my college situation. I honestly have no idea what I'm going to do. I have time now, but what happens when I don't?

  Anyways, this is going to have to be a short email. If I spend too much time in my room, my parents start freaking out about my spiraling into some depression. There are a lot of cliffs and high places here.

  XOXO

  Annie.

  From: Jude

  Subject: Only?

  To: Annie

  Anns,

  Yeah, you have time. But you wouldn't be all alone here. You'll have Nikki and I. You could apply to one of the colleges that we are going to. Or to one close.

  Hey, can I have your physical address. I have something I want to mail you.

  Can I ask a question? Why didn't you tell anyone you were moving? You were here one day, and the next day you were just gone. I know we were only together for a little while, but I would have thought I'd have at least got a goodbye. I came to school one day to find out my girlfriend had moved. I figured I ranked a little higher than the rest of the school. I'm not mad, but I am a little hurt.

  Miss you like crazy,

  Jude

  From: Annie

  Subject: See it from my side

  To: Jude

  Jude,

  Sorry, this is going to be so short, I have to do stuff with my mom.

  Jude, I move a lot. It was sheer luck that we were in Norfolk for 5 years. Pure and utter luck. Goodbyes are hard. It's easier if I just slip away and everyone can go on like they didn't know me. It will happen anyways, this way there isn't that awkward ‘staying in touch' phase. My friends from before? I haven't talked to them in years. People change and the longer you try to hold on to that the more it sucks in the end.

  I'm really sorry, I hurt your feelings. I didn't mean too. I'll write to you for as long as you want. But if you get to the point where we've just become too different to carry on a conversation, it's going to suck. We'll wake up one day and realize we haven't talked to each other in weeks… or is it months?

  I have to go.

  You're definitely crazy,

  Annie

  From: Annie

  Subject: Its official

  To:Nikki

  I hate you for giving Jude my address. This is why told you I didn't want to talk to people after I left! He had gone 9 weeks without me! He was getting over me. Then you ruined it!

  NO X's or O's for you this time!

  A very pissed off Annie

  From: Nikki

  Subject: Melodramatic much?

  To:Annie

  Annie,

  Woah doggy, What happened? Jude asked me if you said anything to me about him. He said he thought you were upset. Annie, you don't have to isolate yourself. People here care about you! If Jude wants to talk to you, then let him. Before you found out you were moving, you were so happy to be going out with Jude. You living there and him living here doesn't change that.

  I don't understand why you are so stubborn about this. I love you and only want what's best for you. As your best friend, it's my job to give it to you even when you don't want it. I present to you, Jude.

  Deal with it.

  Extra X's and O's for you grumpy gus.

  Nikki

  From: Jude

  Subject: Who are you?

  To:Annie

  Annie,

  I don't even know what to say.

  I can't believe you think we would just forget you if you just left.

  Especially me. I can't believe you would think that about me.

  People change. You're right. But we can't stop change, nor would we want to. Change helps us become better versions of ourselves. It doesn't make what once was any less significant.

  I'm going to write to you every day, even if I have nothing to say.

  Stubborn as always,

  Jude

  From: Jude

  Subject: Where are you?

  To:Annie

  Annie,

  Where are you at? I haven't heard from you in a few days.

  Please write back,

  Jude

  From: Nikki

  Subject: Stop Sulking

  To:Annie

  You better cut this shit out. Stop this pity party and answer our emails.

  So help me bob, I will call your mom.

  SOON PLEASE!

  From: Jude

  Subject: Anns….

  Date: March 13, 2012 3:05pm

  To:Annie

  Is this how its gonna be? You're just going to ignore me? Pretend like I never existed. Don't do this, Anns.

  I miss you more e
veryday

  Jude

  From: Nikki

  Subject: Final Notice

  To:Annie

  You have 24 hours to answer our emails or I am calling your mom and she won’t let you out of her sight for the next 2 years.

  Don't test me.

  Nikki

  From: Annie

  Subject: Aye Aye captain Bitch.

  To: Nikki

  You wouldn't dare call my mom. You were bluffing.

  I don't want to think about this. Cheer me up jerk.

  Annie

  From: Annie

  Subject: You are too sweet

  To: Jude

  Jude,

  I just got the picture you sent me. I love it. Its one of the sweetest things anyone has ever done for me. Is this from the bonfire you had over Thanksgiving break? It looks like it. Right before you drug me out and tried to make me dance. I warned you. Firelight is a great filter.

  Remember that time you and Nikki came to my ROTC lock in with me? Nikki spent the entire night flirting with that guy only to find out he was 12? And you taught me to skate?

  I was sore in places I didn't even know existed for weeks.

  How is the baseball season going? How are the guys?

  Always,

  Anns

  From: Jude

  Subject: Only for you.

  To: Annie

  Anns,

  LMAO. I remember. You fell on your ass so many times I was afraid you were going to bruise. I'm going to remind Nikki of her cradle robbing ways today in Chem class. That was a fabulous night. It was our first kiss. Do you remember that? I do. I had planned on kissing you that night when I took you home. You being, well you, had to beat me too it. Favorite first kiss ever.

  Baseball is going good. I've been pitching mostly or playing short. There have been several scouts hanging around games. I'm not sure if they're there for me or someone else though.

  The guys are good. Austin sprained his wrist. He's supposed to be taking it easy for a little while, but he's playing instead. Coach is afraid its going to make it worse. You know Austin, when he wants something he gets it.

  Tell me about your dock job. I can't imagine you with a fish in your hands.

  Miss you girl,

  Jude

  From: Nikki

  Subject: That's Miss Captain Bitch to you

  To:Annie

  Annie,

  A little bossy aren't we? If you thought I was bluffing you wouldn't have responded. By the way, thanks for reminding Jude of the lock in that shall never ever be mentioned again. I mean it, like never. ever. again. Jesus, I kiss one young guy and automatically I'm the Mrs. Robinson of Golden Heights High School.

  Cheer you up? I have two words for you: Poison Sumac. Attached please see the picture of our stupidest moment ever. I swear I still have blister scars in places I rather not mention. Luckily I haven't had to explain them to Luke. Yet.

  Speaking of the devil, Luke asked me to prom. No biggie.

  XOXO,

  Nik

  From:Annie

  Subject: NO.WAY

  To: Nikki

  NIKKI,

  DUDE! That's a huge deal! I'm so excited for you. I think an online shopping date is called for. You’re wearing blue. Baby blue.

  Oh god, the poison sumac. How the hell were we supposed to know? I'm convinced they planted it just to screw with us. Those blisters were awful. I'm getting itchy just thinking about it.

  I attached a picture of the view from my parents window. My window looks almost directly into another window. Creepy. But no one is usually in there, so I think it's a guest room.

  XOXO

  Annie

  From: Annie

  Subject: Jude Anderson, Superstar

  To: Jude

  Jude

  What can I say? I’m always up for a challenge. You can’t label that as the best first kiss ever. You haven’t had all your first kisses yet.

  They are totally there to watch you. Since you're so awesome. ;)

  Austin, Austin, Austin. He's too stubborn for his own good.

  So, I've only touched a fish a couple times. I mostly clean and organize the boats afterward. But when was the last time you touched a fish Mr. Anderson?

  I miss you. A lot.

  XOXO

  Annie

  From: Nikki

  Subject:Future FBI agents

  To: Annie

  Annie,

  Online shopping sounds amazing. I want a mermaid dress. Show off these cheer muscles I've been working on so much.

  You may be on to something about the poison sumac. I'll check to see if it actually grows here. It sounds like something too smart and well thought out for Corey and Ricky to have come up with though.

  I think I may be going out of town for spring break with mom and dad. They said something about camping. I'll let you know.

  Nikki

  From: Jude

  Subject: Are you serious?

  To: Annie

  Anns,

  Touche, my girl, touche. I don't think I've ever touched a fish that wasn't beer battered and deep fried.

  I think I can name someone else who is too stubborn for their own good. cough*annie*cough.

  If I remember correctly, you don't have an organizational bone in your body. Does your boss know this?

  Always,

  Jude

  From: Annie

  Subject: You sir can politely….

  To: Jude

  Jude,

  Shut up.

  XOXO,

  Annie

  From: Annie

  Subject:Welcome to suck fest 2012

  To: Nikki

  Nikki,

  That sucks. We don't have spring break here. :(.

  I wish we did. Mom and Dad are adamant about me not coming back over the summer.

  I hate it here.

  I miss you.

  I miss home.

  I think I'm coming home for college… No, I AM coming home for college. Hell, I’ll come home and be a barista forever.

  XOXO

  Annie

  From: Jude

  Subject: Make me

  To: Annie

  Anns

  Simmer down killer.

  I can say that it was the best first kiss, because it’s my last first kiss.

  I'm going on a cruise with my parents for spring break. My phone/laptop aren't allowed to go.

  I'm gonna miss talking to you. I'll send you a postcard. Hope you like the Virgin Islands.

  Yours Always,

  Jude

  From: Annie

  Subject: DONT LEAVE ME!

  To: Nikki

  Nikki,

  I hope you don't. Jude is going on a cruise with his parents.

  When does break start?

  I don't want to go a whole week without talking to you guys. :(

  XOXOX

  Annie

  From: Annie

  Subject:Pretty please, with a cherry on top?

  To: Jude

  Jude,

  I’m glad you’re not here right now, because the way that comment made my blush is super embarrassing.

  Nikki is going out of town too.

  You sure you can't sneak just the phone?

  Please?

  XOXO

  Annie

  From: Annie

  Subject:Alonaphobia

  To: Nikki

  Nikki,

  I guess you already left. Have a good time.

  XOXO

  Annie

  From: Annie

  Subject:Waiting not so patiently

  To: Jude

  Jude,

  I guess I missed you guys.

  I hope you guys have a good time.

  I'll miss you.

  I already miss you.

  XOXO,

  Anns

  "Annie!" My mother, Kellie, yelled up the stairs. I gave my computer one last refresh and sighed at the s
ame screen before I went downstairs.

  It had been 2 days since I received an email from either of them. 2 days. It doesn't seem like much, but for me it was. I had gotten so accustomed to talking to them every day, to holding on to those few shreds of my previous life, that those 2 days seemed like 2 years.

  It started at 2 days, then it became 2 weeks, then 2 months, then 2 years. The sinking feeling in my gut told me that this was the beginning of the end for my short-lived fantasy. I couldn't deny that I enjoyed it while it lasted though. I did. A lot.

  "Yeah?" I asked my mom as I walked into the kitchen and snagged a handful of olives from the bowl she just uncovered when her back was turned.

  "Did you eat some of these olives?" She asked, one eyebrow raised and that ‘I know what you did' look that moms seem to have.

  "What olives?" I was able to mumble through a mouthful of said olives.

  "Anyways." she added some type of spices to the bowl before recovering it and replacing it back in the fridge. "I'm worried. You haven't voluntarily left your room in 2 days."

  "Sorry?" I didn't leave my room for almost a month when we first moved here. I don't know why she was worried about 2 days.

  "You were so happy for a while." She started shoving her wallet and keys into her purse. "What happened?"

  "Nothing." I shrugged my shoulders in an attempt to appear nonchalant.

  "We're going to the market." without waiting for a response, she headed to the door.

  This was her technique for when she didn't want me to fight her on something. She just left, leaving me to follow her. Which is exactly what I did.

  The market was a beautiful thing, if I were any less sullen and grumpy, I would actually enjoy it. People from town setup in a grid like pattern with their goods. Anything from fruits to carved rosaries, to homemade beauty products. It sort of reminded me of a gypsy market, though I would never admit that out loud.

  Mom strolled through the aisles, stopping at several tables. Her Greek was amazing for someone who just started learning 6 months ago, when we found out we were moving. I guess that was just my mom, she had the ability to blend smoothly with her surroundings no matter where we were. Her green eyes and olive skin didn't hurt either. I sadly was not blessed with either of those gifts. My pasty white skin and blonde hair did nothing to hide that I was, in fact, a sore thumb here.

  After 3 or 4 more aisles, I was growing tired with being here. What I really wanted was to go home and check my email again. I knew there wouldn't be anything there, but I could still hope.

  "What did we come here for?" I asked, thinking maybe I could go find it for her.

  "Nothing particular. It's just such a nice day." She answered, looking at a pretty baby blue, eyelet dress. "This would look pretty on you."

  "It's nice." I said, getting more and more impatient by the second.

  "I think I'll get it for you." She pulled out her wallet and paid the nice man, thanking him in Greek. "What time is it?"

  "Just past 6." I answered, looking at my watch.

  "All right, we can go home now, Miss Impatient."

  When we arrived, I almost bolted from the car before it was even stopped. I had made it to the hallway before my dad stopped me.

  "Hey you." He said looking up at me from his recliner. He just have just got home, he was still in his uniform. "Finally decided to leave your room?"

  "Hey daddy." I did a quick glance at my parents and then the stairs. "Yeah, you know, fresh air and all."

  "Don't let her lie to you, James." mom said, giving me a smirk. "She didn't do it willingly."

  Oh, excellent. Now they were both going to gang up on me.

  "Is that so? Well, go back to your lair, you hermit." He said, he and my mother shared a knowing look. Whatever, I didn’t need to be told twice.

  Taking the steps two at a time (and tripping a couple times), I opened my bedroom door. Then my mouth hit the floor. Sitting on my bed, was Nikki and Jude, and sitting beside my bed, were two very hefty looking suitcases. What were they doing here? Was this for real? I closed my eyes and gave my head a quick shake. I opened one eye, hoping to lessen the blow my imagination had conjured

  But when I opened them, they were still there, both looking very proud of themselves. Without warning Nikki threw herself into my arms, hugging me close to her and possibly fracturing my spine.

  "Surprise!" She yelled, giving my arms a squeeze. "Annie? You look pale, are you ok?"

  "Just surprised." I say, It was true, I was in shock I think.

  My mind wasn't working correctly. I could see them, here in front of me, I could feel Nikki's arms on me, but I couldn't actually process that they were actually here. I was shuffled from one set of arms to another. My mind clicked on really fast and Jude held me close in a tight embrace. The scent of gasoline and grass that always seemed to cling to him wafted around me.

  "I missed you." He said I forgot how low his baritone voice was. How much older than his 17 years he sounded.

  "You guys are the best." I said, holding him so tight, I thought he might pop in my arms. Jude held me just as tight.

  “What are friends for?” Nikki asked, throwing herself across my bed.

  "My life would-"

  "Suck without us?" Nikki chimed in.

  "Yeah," I answered, leaning up on my tippy toes to press a kiss on Jude's lips. "My life really would suck without you."