by A. C. Wilson
“Go home, Nora. I’m not leaving.” Rayne growled back and resisted Nora’s urgings to get up off the bar stool. As soon as Rayne shifted back, her face paled almost immediately. It all happened in slow motion, but Nora was mortified anyway. Rayne leaned over and threw up all over the floor. Nora could only close her eyes and hope that it didn’t splatter all over her new boots.
“Uh…I’m sorry.” Rayne groaned as she tried to hold onto her precarious seat. Nora reached for her phone in her back pocket, but felt a hand on her arm. She turned to find Colt standing next to her with a piteous look on his face.
“Let me give you both a ride home.” Colt smiled softly at Nora and reached a hand out to Rayne. Nora stepped back from the vomit and looked up to find the bartender looking much less than amused.
“Bill me.” Nora mouthed as she followed behind Colt and Rayne out the door of the bar. Nora wasn’t too worried about what the patrons would all say about tonight, except that Rayne might want to find a new bar to drink in after that less than graceful exit.
Colt walked them both to his truck and helped them inside. Nora felt strange meeting up with him like this considering what they both knew now to be the truth. He was Drew’s father. In some instances they were a family connected by the intricacies of life. She pulled the seat belt over her shoulder and locked it. Colt climbed into the driver’s seat and put his keys in the ignition.
“I feel like a hero tonight. Thank you.” Colt grinned and Nora felt her anxiety ease. Here was the goofy, friendly guy she knew.
“You really are. Thank you for coming to the rescue.” Nora looked over her shoulder to find Rayne leaning against the window in the back seat. Nora thought it was a good thing the doors locked when the truck was put into drive.
“I’m afraid to even ask.” Colt glanced to the backseat and then smiled at Nora. She could only shrug.
“Issues with my brother, I think.” Nora didn’t want to get into how this might be connected to the moment she told Randy she might be in love with Colt. Everything had consequences and it all came full circle.
“It happens to the best of us.” Colt pulled out of the parking lot and onto the main highway. Nora could see his face from the lights of the passing cars.
“What does?” Nora felt a bit fuzzy from the shots. She was trying to follow along. It probably wasn’t the best time to chat about important things or anything really.
“Personal issues come up and we make poor choices. I for one am a master at it apparently.” The regret in Colt’s voice caught Nora off guard for a minute. After the way they had left things when he had first dropped the custody ball on her, they had only ever talked through their lawyers. She had no idea that he felt this way.
“Emotions tend to blur the lines of right and wrong. I’m sorry that I dropped things on you like I did. I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to tell you about Drew if I waited and I’d already waited seven years.” Nora let out the breath she had been holding. It felt strange sharing this in the moment as it was and in front of Rayne. Nora looked back, but Rayne’s eyes were closed.
“It took some soul searching for me to even come close to understanding your motives for keeping our son a secret. The adult that I am now, I would have wanted you to share that little life with me. I mean I missed so much and I’m afraid I’m going to miss so much more.” Colt was calm in his exterior expressions, but she knew he was like a bunch of fireworks inside. She knew that feeling so well.
“I know and I’m only sorry for the time you’ve lost with him. Drew is an amazing boy, but I’m not going to apologize for doing what I thought was best at the time. There were no promises Colt, and I didn’t think that you would come back here. All I knew for certain was how important your dream was to you and I didn’t want you to blame me and Drew for ruining it.” They passed the last mile marker before the turn off to Randall Ranch. Nora indicated the turn and then sat quietly in her seat. She didn’t want to fight with Colt tonight. The couple of miles to Rayne’s house went by quickly and Nora was thankful for that. She could probably spend the night here if she thought that she couldn’t take more of Colt tonight. Then again her brother and Rayne had some things to work out.
“Here we are.” Colt said as he put the truck in park only a few feet from the front steps to the porch. The yard light came on and Garrett opened the door. Nora got out and then attempted to help Rayne from her perch. It didn’t go so well. Rayne was still really drunk and as she practically fell on Nora, Colt leveled her off by taking her arm around his shoulders.
“What in the hell?” Garrett asked as he stalked around the front of the truck and saw Colt supporting Rayne. Nora felt that it was best if she did the talking.
“We went to the bar and Rayne had a few too many. Colt made sure we got home safely.” The words seemed to pour out as Colt passed Rayne off to Garrett. As drunk as her friend was Nora saw the narrowed glare at her brother.
“Thanks for driving them. Come on, Nora.” Garrett turned towards the house, but Nora only followed as far as the steps.
“Colt is taking me home, Garrett. I think you need to have a rational and reasonable conversation with Rayne. She’s pretty upset.” Nora didn’t want to share too much as it wasn’t her place and Colt didn’t need to know what was going on.
“You can’t go home with him, Nora.” Garrett lowered his voice but the growl remained. Nora looked down at her boots and mustered some coolness. As hot tempered as she could be, Nora didn’t want to fight tonight.
“It’s fine. I’m a big girl, little brother.” Nora offered the last as a jab. Garrett didn’t like that he was younger and he always tried to defend Nora. Matt did too. They shared a considering gaze and then a brief nod had her brother taking Rayne into the house. Nora was doubly glad that Colt had stayed on the passenger side of his truck and she walked to the door.
“Ready?” Colt asked as he provided a hand to help her up. Nora wasn’t sure she was ready for any of this. So much of what she had been certain of before was suddenly shot to bits.
Twenty minutes later, Colt pulled up outside of her little house and turned off the engine. Nora felt as if spiders were sneaking up her spine and leaving cold footprints as they went. They sat quietly for a moment and Nora was just about to get out when Colt turned in his seat towards her. Her hand froze on the door handle.
“Nora, our conversation before was interrupted and I feel like I need to say this so you’ll understand me. I can only speak as the man I am now and that if someone were pregnant with my child, I would want to know as soon as possible.” Colt took off his hat and set it in the dash. Nora looked down at her hands and wondered if it was too late to run. He continued speaking before she could decide.
“I put everything into making singing a career and I didn’t have much. I went from job to job just trying to make ends meet and singing at night at every open mic. I didn’t have anything to recommend myself to a child. I wouldn’t have been able to support a wife.”
Nora’s heart was beating nearly out of her chest and her mouth was dry. She suddenly regretted the alcohol and staying in this vehicle with him. Mostly she was confused.
“Colt, I never wanted anything from you. I don’t want anything from you now except for you to make room in your life for Drew. Anything else he needs I can provide and I have done so since I found out I was pregnant.” Nora hated that she felt vulnerable. Unshed tears pricked her eyes and she couldn’t look at him. Colt reached over and gently touched her knee.
“I want to meet Drew and make him a part of my life. Hopefully we could even consider making you both a part of my life.” For a better part of seven years, Nora had wondered what it would take to get Colt to say those things to her. She often dreamed of a happily ever after with Colt, Drew and herself. She could only stare at that man now. Colt was a stranger for the most part and all they knew of each other was that one summer.
“Colt, I’m married.” The words fell out of her mouth and Nora felt a moment o
f supreme lunacy.
Didn’t I just wish that this would happen?
Haven’t I always wanted this?
Colt raised his fingertips to touch her cheek and Nora held his gaze. Everything was in slow motion.
“Unhappily, I thought.” Colt tilted his head. “You’re not in love with him, are you?”
The question of the century! Her wary eyes searched the face that she had dreamed of night after night, over and over for years. Still that question Colt had so carefully asked was one that needed an answer. Nothing could end or begin without it.
Chapter 24
Nora decided that another sleepless night would be too much to even consider as she got ready for work. It was a routine she was overly familiar with and could do almost with her eyes closed. Ironic that they nearly were! She had lost sleep before, but something about this stretch left her completely depleted and tender. The slightest sound, the random word would have her in jubilation or tears. It wasn’t fair. Everyone she loved had stepped back and suddenly she felt the loss. Even Randy had seemed to disappear overnight and she kept herself from calling or texting him.
Nora tried to convince herself that Randy had abandoned her and that if a man could walk so easily away, then he wasn’t worth running after. For a day or two she believed it. It wasn’t hard to feel angry and betrayed. They were feelings she was well acquainted with. The days passed. The hours and minutes trudged by. The more desperate her need to hang onto the dark emotions, the less sure of them she was. Nora realized that she had spent years being angry and hurt. Even though she had made the choice to raise and care for Drew all on her own, she was angry that she should have too. Even though she felt safer being on her own, Nora was hurt by the realization that she didn’t want to be.
These two breakthroughs nearly overnight had brought her to her knees and the vulnerable position made all of this more excruciating. The morning brought inner turmoil and outer chaos. She hoped that getting ready for work would calm the tender nerves.
“Hey Mom, can I go to Sam’s after school? We are going to work on our science project.” Drew said with a mouthful of cereal. Nora struggled to understand what he was saying.
“Did you decide what to do for the project?” Nora asked as she grabbed a clean mug and poured some coffee.
Coffee was a natural savior.
“His mom is going to help us make a volcano.” Drew hurried through the last bite and took his bowl to the sink. Nora lifted a brow as she watched him clean his mess. Drew rarely did that unless he was being told to.
“Fun, well, I guess you can get off at Sam’s. Call me when you get there though.” Nora made sure she had eye contact with her son. At seven years old he was responsible, but he could still forget what she hoped he wouldn’t.
“I will.” Drew grinned and then grabbed his backpack.
“Honey, you know we talked about your real father. I think you should meet him.” Drew turned a dirty look her way. “He really wants to meet you.” Nora prayed that she sounded impartial and that her son wouldn’t fight her on this. It was hard enough knowing she had opened this can of worms.
“Do I have to meet him?” Drew asked, his blue eyes firmly set on his mother’s. She tilted her head and then nodded.
“I think you need to meet Colt. I’ll go too.” She was quick to assure him that he wouldn’t be alone. Her son put on a thoughtful face and inhaled deeply. He looked so much older in that moment. She didn’t like it.
“Alright.” Drew put his backpack on his shoulders and moved forward to give Nora a hug. She held on a moment longer and squeezed a bit harder.
“You better get to the bus. I’ll talk to you after school.” Nora let him go and watched as he walked out the door. The school bus stopped just at the end of the driveway.
Nora finished up her coffee and grabbed her purse. Double checking that she had her phone and her wallet, she locked the front door. The drive to work wasn’t overly lengthy, but it was long enough to give her time to worry more. It was a vicious cycle really and it was getting to be a great pain in the butt. She was in the middle of scolding herself when her phone rang in the console. Glancing down at the screen, she saw it was Andy calling her. Clicking the phone onto speaker, Nora answered.
“Hey Andy.” Nora hoped that she sounded less bothered. Pregnant Andy was sensitive to such things lately. Matt had even told her that his wife opted to stay home instead of going about in public.
“Morning, Nora, how are you?” Andy’s voice sounded pleasant but strained. It was an odd combination even for the ever happy Andy. Nora’s alert when up.
“I’m on my way to work. Hoping the coffee kicks in soon or it is going to be a long day.” Nora lightened her voice, but her sister-in-law wasn’t fooled.
“Still not sleeping?” Andy asked, hitting the peg right on the head. Nora sighed and wondered why she tried to hide anything from her best friend.
“No, I can’t seem to quite get there. I feel like a walking zombie.” Nora attempted humor again, but Andy didn’t laugh. She was thoughtful and sad. It brought Nora down another peg.
“I’m sorry. I haven’t been sleeping very well myself. This little person I’m carrying can’t seem to stay away from the nerves in my legs.” Andy sounded exhausted. “Matt keeps complaining that I’m kicking him.”
“My little brother probably deserves it for one thing or another.” Nora chuckled and Andy joined in.
“I don’t know about that. Matt has been quite the doting husband and devoted father. I just can’t wait for this little one to be here.” Andy’s smile could be heard in her voice and Nora felt some warming in her heart.
Love and family. That is what life was all about. The greatest treasures and the greatest triumphs came from those two things.
“You have a blessed family, Andy.” Nora felt that strange anxiety flutter in her stomach again and she didn’t even want to consider what that might mean.
“Thank you. I did call to see if you wanted to come over and have some coffee this morning. As you are on your way to work, maybe you could come over afterwards?” Andy didn’t quite sound like herself. Nora figured it might be easier to help someone else with their problems instead of figuring out her own.
“Since when do you drink coffee?” Nora chuckled. “Of course, I’ll come over. I get off work at four.” Nora signaled as she pulled into the parking lot at the veteran’s home.
“Great. I’ll see you this afternoon.” Andy still sounded strange, but Nora couldn’t conquer Rome in one day. Some things just had to wait until they were face to face.
“Perfect. I’ll talk to you soon.” Nora said as she hung up the phone and sighed as she got ready to head into the building.
Nora thought the morning shift was one she liked the best. All of their patients had rested and weren’t quite as irritable as they were in the evenings. Sometimes she thought of them as little kids. Some things just came full circle in life and flaunting authority seemed to be one of them. The morning circuit actually went faster than Nora had expected it might. It was a pleasant surprise when at one o’clock she noted she only had three more hours until she was off shift.
“Nora, Mr. Clifton is asking for you.” Gloria, fellow nurse and friend, smiled sweetly. Nora huffed. Mr. Clifton was a very different soul and conflicted with Alzheimer’s and that brought on serious anxiety as well. The old man was also the culprit who had decked Nora in the head with a food tray a few weeks ago.
“How is Mr. Clifton doing today? Do I need a helmet?” Nora offered a half smile at her friend. The two nurses tried not to laugh, but the whole incident had given the other employees something to chuckle about while Nora was gone.
“He seems really good today.” Gloria picked up a pile of charts and walked around the desk. Sitting down at the computer, Gloria looked up. “He misses his beautiful Nora.” Gloria added a wink and Nora laugh good-naturedly. Mr. Clifton was a sweet man, but his illness was to blame for many of his quirks. It took s
ome time to calm him down when he began to panic in an unfamiliar landscape. That part was the unpredictability of Alzheimer’s.
“I’ll go check on him.” Nora put her own folders away and checked her pockets. She always tried to have peppermints on her when she saw Mr. Clifton. They were his favorites. She walked down the hall to his room. Mr. John Clifton was ninety-one years old and he had been at the veteran’s home for the last ten years. He had shared pieces of his military story with her over the years. He had been a very young man when he had entered the military during World War II. After hearing about the bombing of Pearl Harbor, John Clifton had volunteered. He said it had seemed so exciting to be going to war at the tender age of eighteen. Nora couldn’t imagine her own son going to war. The fear, the uncertainty, and the pride would have probably driven her off the deep end.
Nora came to Mr. Clifton’s door and pushed it open. It went easily and soon she could see him sitting in a chair by the window. Gloria must have opened it a few inches to let the soft breeze inside. Nora much preferred the fresh air to the stale, medical smell inside. She smiled as she neared him, but the old man didn’t look at her. He was progressively losing his battle with this disease and it was wearing on him physically.
“Mr. Clifton, Gloria said you wished to see me?” Nora asked as she came around the front of him. She tried to gauge where exactly he was in his cognitive state. Sometimes the change would completely take someone by surprise.
“My Nora.” He smiled and the wrinkles near his eyes perked up. His lips were flat and dry.
“How are you today, Mr. Clifton?” Nora tucked her stethoscope into her smock pocket and took a seat in the chair across from him. He lifted a feeble hand to stop her.
“John, please.” John smiled and then took a deep breath. Nora slid this picture away to study later.
“John, then, how is your day?” She didn’t mind repeating herself. It happened quite a lot when you worked here. Nora didn’t mind. Something about this place settled her and she liked helping the men and women who had served their nation.