“Greetings,” he said, laying his pen aside and closing a journal of some sort. He stood and extended his hand to Adam. “I see you made the trek unscathed.”
“Good morning, Horace.” Adam shook the lighthouse keeper’s hand. “I thought my fiancé would enjoy the challenge of taking the shore route here. Now we’ll see if she’s up for the climb,” he said, tipping a smile at Rebecca and making introductions.
After greeting Mr. Jenkins, Rebecca asked, “Are you saying there is another way to get here?”
At Adam’s nod, Rebecca laughed. “Oh my, I can imagine the look on Grandmother’s face when she realizes Dawson purposely misled her.”
“I warned Dawson of the consequences,” Adam said, laughing. He turned to Horace. “If you’re interested in seeing a Crane taken down a peg, just watch when my grandmother learns she could have come here in the comfort of a carriage.”
Horace Jenkins laughed and shook his head. “Sounds like something Dawson Crane would do.”
Adam nodded. “It does, but Grandmother is better for the adventure, and I’d bet my last dollar she’ll be glad we took the beach to get here.”
As their laughter settled, Horace gestured to the narrow set of stairs that wound around and around to the top of the lighthouse. “Shall we wait for Mr. Crane and your grandmother to arrive?”
“They may be a while yet. I think it’s safe to assume that Grandmother won’t be climbing anymore stairs today,” Adam said. He caught Rebecca’s hand. “Do you need to sit for a spell before we head up?”
“I don’t want to wait another minute, Adam.”
“You young folks go on up,” the keeper said. “I’ll be up after I greet Mr. Crane and your grandmother.”
That’s all Rebecca needed to hear. She was off toward the stairs like a breaking wave heading for shore.
Laughing at her single-minded pursuit, Adam caught her elbow. “You’d better save some of that energy, love, because you’re going to need it.”
“Race you to the top,” Rebecca said, stepping in front of him and purposely blocking the entrance to the narrow stairs.
“Oh-ho! You may soon regret leading the way as I won’t be in front of you to pull you along.”
“You’ll just have to push then,” she said, giggling as she bounded up several steps.
And off they went, climbing and teasing as if they were teens in the throes of a first romance. It wasn’t their first, of course. They had fallen in love once before—with each other—but for Rebecca it was all new and exciting.
Adam crowded her from behind, pretending he would pass her when they both knew it would be nearly impossible and highly dangerous if he succeeded. Gasping for breath, they circled around and up... around and up, until finally Rebecca stopped at the sixth level. Doubled forward, hands on her knees, she panted. “Should have... let you... lead,” she said, barely able to get the words out. “Can... barely... breathe.”
Laughing, Adam grasped her hand and pulled her down to sit on the stair tread. “I have no idea how... Horace and his... staff make this climb several times a day.”
With her hand pressed to her pounding heart, Rebecca rolled her head against the cool brick wall. “I can’t imagine it.” They sat for a minute just breathing.
“Want to see something remarkable?” Adam asked.
“Not if it involves climbing stairs.”
He laughed and squeezed her hand. “Just lean forward a bit and look down.”
Curious, Rebecca did as instructed—and she saw straight down the center of the circular staircase that went round and round and round to the bottom of the lighthouse. She cried out in alarm and threw herself back against the brick wall. Head spinning, she thought she might be sick. “Adam, please tell me these stairs will support us.” They seemed to have no scaffolding or support beams beneath them. A fall from this height was certain death.
“Of course, sweetheart. I’m sorry. I thought you would enjoy the sight.” He stroked her hand. “Horace and his staff tromp up and down these stairs several times a day. They keep them in magnificent repair. They’ll support us all the way to the top unless you’d rather turn back.”
She shook her head. “It just made me woozy. I’ll finish our climb as soon as things stop spinning.”
“That a girl.” He waited a couple of minutes then said, “Let’s go now so we can have a few minutes to gawk before Horace joins us.” Adam stood and helped her to her feet. “Watch your step and keep your eyes ahead of you. That should save you from toppling over the edge.”
“That’s incredibly reassuring,” she said, gripping the railing and continuing upward.
“I’m right here, darling. We’ll reach the top without the stairs collapsing.”
“We’ll never know it if they do,” she said, laughing as she continued the climb on tired, wobbly legs.
A few minutes later they reached the eighth level, breathing hard. They stepped into the service room lined with cupboard and tools. From there, Adam led Rebecca to another set of stairs and stopped her at the bottom.
“When we reach the top of these stairs we’ll be outside. It might be a little like looking over the edge of the edge of the world. Are you ready for this?” he asked.
She nodded, still quite breathless. “Just hold onto me.”
“Always,” he said. With that, he swept her into his arms and ascended the stairs.
Stunned, Rebecca gripped his shoulders. “What are you doing, Adam?”
“We’ll reach the top together, darling.” With that he took the final two steps and brought them to an outside balcony called a gallery that encircled the lantern room where the glass encased beacon of light resided.
All Rebecca could see was the long stretch of beach and miles and miles of blue ocean. “Oh, my...”
Slowly, he lowered her feet to the decking.
She stood beside him simply awestruck as her spirit soared like a seagull into the sunny sky above. A multitude of fishing boats dotted the shoreline and looked the size of pitch barrels from this height. She could see the shops at Crane Landing and the twin rivers and the bay and how they connected with the ocean. Huge, rolling waves struck the rocky shoals below, roaring and frothing as they broke across the shore. The rickety cliff-side steps that she had climbed were directly below. To her right she noticed a little inlet with a hidden boat dock and two rowboats bobbing in the water. The keeper’s large sturdy home sat on a grass-topped hill above the cove. Other small buildings that Rebecca couldn’t identify were located nearby. Finally, her gaze dropped straight down the towering lighthouse, making her head woozy and her stomach light. With a small gasp, she stepped away from the sturdy railing that surrounded the gallery.
Adam took her in his arms and steadied her. “May I suggest that you avoid looking straight down from this height?”
“Duly noted,” she said, releasing a light laugh. “Have I always been this sensitive to heights?”
“Not that I recall, but then we’ve never climbed this high before. You did enjoy climbing our trees at home.” He briskly rubbed her arms. “You’re trembling.”
“Well, I just scared the stuffing out of myself. And those trees I apparently used to climb have big limbs to hold onto and to break my fall.”
He chuckled and hugged her. “You’re safe here, darling. I won’t let you go.”
For a few minutes they stood, her back to his chest, taking in the expansive view of lush green woodlands and the Crane River that cut a winding path to the rocky beach where they merged with the cobalt blue ocean.
They watched together as a merchant schooner, sails unfurled, made is way out of the bay into the open Atlantic waters. The three-mast vessel rode the waves with ease. The men on deck moved like a colony of ants, the deck glistening with ocean spray and sunshine.
Safe in Adam’s arms, Rebecca allowed her gaze to return to the crashing waves below. “I’m beginning to understand why you would be concerned about the construction and durability of y
our sailing vessel rather than the romance of the journey. I’d only envisioned billowing sails and a vast, shimmering ocean of calm water, not those powerful waves pounding the rocks below.”
“The voyage is a lot more romantic if you don’t become fish bait,” he said.
She laughed. “I can’t argue that logic. Goodness, how small Crane Landing appears from this height. Perhaps it’s because I’m seeing more of the ocean that makes it appear so. Up here the world is so vast and... exciting,” she said. “Standing here in the wind makes me feel like I have wings.” She turned to face Adam. “I feel this way when I ride Star. Is that what sailing on a schooner is like?”
“Hmmm... sailing is like... it’s like nothing I’ve ever experienced,” he answered, his voice going soft. “At first it’s exciting and you want to race the wind, and then when you’re bounding across the waves you realize how powerful the ocean is and how insignificant and vulnerable you are... and then you grow quiet with respect. Time disappears and you become one with the ocean and it fills you up like wind in a sail. Suddenly, it’s just this moment and this wave and this snap of the sail.”
They fell silent, both of them enjoying a moment that needed no words.
“Do sailors ever tire of the ocean?” she asked eventually.
“I think they tire of the work and being away from their families, but I believe most of them love the ocean like a mistress. You’ve heard the saying that a sailor is married to the sea, right?”
She nodded, taking in all he’d said. “I’m beginning to see the attraction.”
“You’re my ocean, Rebecca.” His kiss was brief, but as powerful as the waves crashing into the shore below. “You are magnificence and mystery and pleasure and danger, and when I’m with you all I can see, or hear, or feel is... now... this moment. I love you, Rebecca, and I’m ready to sail with you. Let’s marry when we get back to Fredonia.”
“Oh, Adam...” She gazed into the beautiful dark depths of his eyes and saw his steadfast love and promise of home, and heaven help her but she wanted to say yes. She wanted to sail an ocean with him and build a home right here in Crane Landing. “I wonder if this is what Princess Cecily felt when Gabriel Crane swept her off on their incredible journey,” she said, because although she wanted to say yes, she didn’t think she should.
“I suspect she was scared but trusted that Gabe loved her and would do anything for her.” Adam stroked Rebecca’s cheek. “I’ll protect you and love you, Rebecca. You can trust in me and in our love.”
“Hello? You two up there, Adam?” The keeper’s warning call from below startled them apart.
Adam’s eyes closed for a brief second, as if the man’s timing couldn’t have been worse.
For Rebecca, the keeper’s call had been well-timed.
Horace Jenkins emerged onto the gallery deck where Rebecca pretended to be studying the shoreline. “Quite a sight isn’t it?” he asked, barely out of breath.
“It’s beyond words,” she said honestly. So was Adam’s profession of love. If looking over the tower’s edge had made her dizzy, Adam’s declaration had made her swoon. How could she have possibly waited all these years to marry him? Rebecca wished she hadn’t waited because now it left her with an impossible decision. She wanted to say yes, but knew she should say no.
As her gaze roved the shoreline, she released a startled gasp. A lone woman walked the beach just south of the lighthouse. Buffeted by the stiff breeze, the woman’s red hair whipped around her head, and her yellow dress flapped around her legs as she strode the shore.
“Ah, you’ve spied my daughter,” Horace said.
Stunned, Rebecca glanced at the man. “You see her?”
“Clearly,” he said. “She often walks this time of day.”
Rebecca turned her eyes to Adam. He nodded that he understood and assured her she wasn’t seeing things. Shifting her attention back to the keeper’s daughter, Rebecca studied the gal for several long seconds, wondering if the keeper’s daughter was the same woman Rebecca had seen on the beach near the shipyard.
“Is that your mystery woman?” Adam asked quietly near her ear.
Rebecca shrugged. It was impossible to determine. “Perhaps,” she said, but she felt far less than certain.
“Would you like to know a little about the workings of a lighthouse?” Mr. Jenkins asked.
“I would indeed,” Rebecca said, dredging up a smile for the kind man. “I’m particularly intrigued by that massive craggy looking piece of glass that is rotating in that open cupola.”
Her description gave Mr. Jenkins a good laugh. Adam, who had apparently visited the lighthouse before, smiled at her as if she were a sweet, naïve student.
“That’s our Fresnel lens, and the reason it looks ‘craggy’ is because those small sections of glass are angled to refract light. It’s a large prism that can reflect a small amount of light over many miles. I’ve had sailors tell me they can see our beacon twenty miles out,” he said, sounding like a proud parent.
“That’s incredible,” Rebecca said, eyeing the huge glass globe. “I understand how it might reflect the sunlight, but I don’t see where the light would come from at night.”
“Well, unless we’re experiencing a nasty storm and poor visibility during daylight sailors navigate by our colors. Every lighthouse along the coast has a different color pattern. Each lighthouse uses a different light signal, too, and our light comes from a flame inside the globe,” he said. “Our lamp emits three flashes every three seconds and that tells mariners they are off shore at Crane Landing at the southern end of Maine.”
Intrigued, she studied the lamp house and large lens. “That is just so... clever.”
Mr. Jenkins was a man who took great pride in his job and loved to share his lighthouse with others. He told Rebecca how he and his staff of three keep the oil lamps cleaned of soot and filled with oil they brought up from the oil house—one of the small outbuildings she’d seen below. They replaced and trimmed the wicks and kept everything cleaned, including the grounds and their rescue boats, which they had used a number of times, even though it wasn’t their paid responsibility to pull stranded sailors from the ocean. It was their job to sound the fog bell and keep log books and report hazards and wrecks. “Our lighthouse saves lives,” he said in a serious and somewhat grave voice. “I fished these waters for ten years before I sold my fishing boat years ago and took this job. I know how dangerous it is out there, so I do my best to give those men on the water all the help I can. It’s my job to warn them of danger, especially unseen hazards.”
She looked at Adam. “I didn’t realize there was so much involved in tending a lighthouse.” To Mr. Jenkins she said, “Thank you for the education, but more so for helping to keep people safe. I am in awe of all you do here.”
Mr. Jenkins blushed so hard his ears turned red, and he mumbled a thank you before he moved toward the stairs. “Shall we head back? Your grandmother is waiting below for you.”
Rebecca cast a last longing look at the ocean she hoped to cross one day. She wanted to sail to Enlightsia, to the home of Princess Cecily, someday with Adam.
As Adam guided her to the stairs, Rebecca knew she wanted to marry this beautiful man. She wanted all he offered her, and she wanted to give as much in return. But with her hallucinations and irrational thinking, what sort of wife would she be? What sort of mother? The harm she could cause herself was one thing. To carry that responsibility for a husband and dependent children was something altogether different.
As she descended the steps inside the lighthouse her thoughts went round and round, exhausting her with their ceaseless circling. She longed for a life with Adam, but her conscience acted like a rudder that steered her away from a possible disaster. If Adam realized what monsters swam in the dark caverns of her mind, would he throw her back like a bad catch? Head down, she prayed she would find a lighthouse at the end of her journey instead of an asylum and a broken heart.
Chapter Twenty-four
r /> Adam’s heart pounded in anticipation as Rebecca arrived at their little rental home on Mill Street. They had returned to Fredonia with their grandmother yesterday evening, but Rebecca had been too weary to view the house.
Heart pounding, he watched her ride into the yard on Star. That she and Star were happy to be reunited was obvious in their jaunty canter into the yard and the affectionate pat on the neck Rebecca gave her mare when they stopped.
“Star seems glad to have you back home,” he said, reaching up to help her dismount. “Now that you’ve had the chance to ride, are you feeling better today?” he asked, admiring the way she’d bundled her hair atop her head. The style gave her a perky look that enhanced her dark beauty. “You’ve been so quiet since we left Crane Landing that I’m a little worried about you.”
She released a long sigh. “I suppose I miss that beautiful bay and the lovely little house I had beside the river.”
“Me, too,” he said, honestly. He would always miss the briny scent of the ocean and the slow way the water seemed to inhale and exhale as if the ocean were a breathing living being.
With their thoughts back at Crane Landing they entered the house.
“This is the best I can offer just now, Rebecca. Our house doesn’t sit beside the river, but it’s just a minute’s walk to the gorge. I hope you will like it.”
“It’s lovely, Adam.”
“I want it to be more than lovely, Rebecca. I want to give you the world.”
She met his eyes, something in her own unsure and perhaps sad. “I don’t need the world, Adam. I was quite content with that small home on Crane River. I suspect, however, that Jojo would like a house where there aren’t a dozen other cats to contend with.”
He watched Rebecca as she took in the home she would be sharing with him. He’d asked Faith and Evelyn to set up their house for them so it was ready when he brought Rebecca home.
My Forever Love Page 25