All of Me (All of Me #1)

by Tamsyn Bester

  Poor fucker.

  He shuts the door behind him, leaving us alone. Gemma brushes out her slick black bob, and then regards me. Her eyes hold no love, only hate and resentment. They do nothing to hide her calculating, and manipulative soul.

  “You obviously came here for a reason, Jason, so spit it out so that I can get back to work.”

  I step closer, and drop a manila envelope on her desk. “Sign the fucking papers, Gemma. That way you can fuck Steve whenever you want to.”

  She sits back in her leather chair, and has the audacity to grin. It’s a menacing tilt of her lips, and I can see the dirty, oily cog turning in her head.

  “You know what I want,” she says, looking conceited, “Give it to me, and I’ll sign.”

  “There’s no way you’re getting half of my assets,” I reply, struggling to reign in my anger. This was her game from the beginning, and I was too stupid to see it. My father told me a union between me and Gemma would ensure that I inherit his company. He told me a partnership between Tate Enterprises, and Fitzgerald International would be beneficial to all of us, but the only way James Fitzgerald would allow it was through marriage. Unfortunately, my father took away my right to decide, and made the decision for me. I found myself engaged, and trapped in a loveless marriage before I could blink. In the process, I lost the only woman I’ve ever really loved.

  “I won’t walk away with anything less than I deserve,” Gemma says. Her face contorts and she shows off her vindictive self.

  How I thought I could have a happy life with this woman is beyond me. I would have made it work if I thought she had any redeemable qualities, but that requires a heart. Something she doesn’t possess. And to think I considered having a child with her. Thank God that didn’t happen. Not without a lack of trying on her end though. She’s tried to ‘catch me with my pants down’ more than once, but lucky for me she failed every time.

  “You deserve nothing,” I snap. “I will make sure you get just that.”

  Gemma laughs, and the sadistic sound fills her office. “Good luck with that, Jason. Don’t forget, we have dinner with my parents on Wednesday.”

  And just like that, she changes the topic. It’s her way of controlling our relationship, and dismissing the notion that our divorce will actually happen. What she doesn’t know is that I’m the one in control, and whether she likes it or not, I will get her to sign.

  “Be sure to send your parents my best, and apologize for my absence.”

  My wife’s perfectly shaped brows dip, and I see her features morph from confusion to anger. “You will be there,” she says, her voice commanding. I like a strong woman, but the way she barks orders has always been off-putting.

  “No, I won’t. I have a function that I have to attend.”

  “What function?”

  I grin, despite my anger, knowing I’m about to make Gemma’s day. “I’m going to a birthday party,” I reply. “For Lacey Forbes.”

  Gemma’s face pales, and she rises from her seat. There are very few things that render her speechless, and the mere mention of the woman she knows I love is one of them.

  “She’s back?” she asks.

  I respond with nothing more than a nod, and watch the color drain from her face. Understanding flashes in her eyes. She knows I’m willing to do anything to get Lacey back, even if it means trampling all over her and our pathetic excuse of a marriage.

  As I watch her, I realize that she’s no longer my wife. She’s my opponent. I should’ve seen her that way from the day I said ‘I Do’, but I was blinded by heartache, and loss.

  “Well,” Gemma says after pulling herself together, “that explains why you’re in such a rush to divorce me. You want to chase after your little whore.”

  Instead of becoming angered by her comment, I decide to torment her instead. “Is that jealousy I hear?”

  She huffs. “Don’t be ridiculous. You can have her – after you give me what you owe me.”

  “Are we negotiating now?” If so, she will lose. She has no idea what I’m truly capable of. What I’m willing to do to get back what she ruined for me two years ago.

  “No. Whether or not you give me what I want is actually irrelevant. You broke poor Lacey’s heart,” her voice drips with sarcasm. “Why would she forgive you?”

  I smile, and this time it’s genuine. “Because I love her.”

  Gemma’s eyes widen, and for a moment I see the hurt. Lacey got the one thing from me Gemma never did. Love. And deep down, that’s the reason Lacey is such a threat. I loved her from the moment I laid eyes on her, no matter how wrong it was. Her age was of little importance to me. I wanted her. Badly. It was something Gemma never understood, and she was always jealous because of it. She wanted that part of me to belong to her. But it never did. It always belonged to Lacey.

  I turn around and walk out of Gemma’s office. Just as I reach the elevator doors, my phone rings and my private investigator’s name flashes across the screen.

  “I have the information you wanted,” he says in lieu of a greeting. “I think you’ll be very interested. It looks like your wife has been having some fun with her father’s business partner.”

  CHAPTER 9

  LACY

  After hitting the gym for over an hour, I drag my tired body upstairs back to my apartment and mentally psych myself out for a hot bath. It’s the day of my party at my parent’s house, and I’ve tried everything to feel some semblance of excitement. But nothing has worked, and my trepidation grows with every minute that goes by. I try to think of every excuse in the book to get out of it, but I know my mother won’t hear of it.

  I resign myself to the fact that I have no choice but to tolerate my family for the evening, whether I’m happy about it or not.

  I open my door, ready to strip down and head straight for the luxurious clawfoot bathtub. Unfortunately, the familiar man sitting in my living room like he owns the damn place brings those plans to an abrupt halt.

  I shut the door loudly, and he turns his head, giving me a warm smile.

  “You’re home,” he says casually, like it’s the most natural thing in the world. It’s something I expect a boyfriend to say to his girlfriend, or a husband to his wife. Not an ex-lover.

  “How did you get in here?” I ask. I do little to hide the annoyance in my voice, and I don’t care if I sound rude. He needs to stop invading my life when clearly I no longer want him in it.

  A little voice mutters liar, but I silence it quickly. Now’s not the time for a useless internal monologue.

  Jason stands, eyeing me from the top of his coffee mug. Smug son of a bitch. Makes himself at home in my apartment, and drinks my coffee.

  “I own the building, remember?”

  He walks past me, his eyes glued to my sweaty gym attire. His gaze leaves me naked, even when I’m fully clothed. It’s disgusting. And hot.

  I catch a whiff of his cologne, and fight off the urge to visibly inhale. He always smelled amazing, and even now I want to breathe him and get lost in his scent. It’s a delicious aphrodisiac to me, when a man smells delicious, but with Jason it’s intensified. The combination of his cologne, and the testosterone he seems to ooze from every pore, is potent, and enough to make any woman’s mouth water.

  Instead of looking away, I decide to check him out the same way he does me. His crisp white shirt clings to his chest, and the rolled up sleeves reveal chorded forearms. I refuse to look at his hands, because I always thought they were one of the sexiest things about him.

  His black hair is stylishly messy, with longer pieces hanging on his forehead. He’s wearing royal blue slacks that fit perfectly around his waist, and upper thighs. If he had to turn around I would imagine how well fitted they are around his glorious backside. I’m well aware that I should hate him, but that doesn’t mean that I can’t admire his gorgeous, virile physique.

  “Like what you see?” He smirks, and my cheeks warm. I was never able to be subtle around this man. He always brought
the most primal reactions out of me.

  “Answer my question,” I say, ignoring his jab. I fold my arms across my chest, realizing the mistake as soon as his eyes drop to my breasts.

  “Like I said - ”

  “You own the building,” I finish for him. “But that still doesn’t give you the right to come into my apartment while I’m not here.”

  “I wanted to come see you, but when you didn’t answer I decided to wait.”

  “You always had a habit of making yourself at home,” I say, looking away. I’m afraid that talking to him like this will feel the way it used to. Remembering what we had will only hurt me, so it’s better to avoid it when possible.

  He steps closer, and touches my neck, rubbing my pulse point. His proximity has my heart racing around in my ribcage and I see his eyes the moment he feels it.

  “Only with you,” he replies, his voice soft. My breathing stutters, causing all rational thought to leave my body. My mind wanders to all the tender moments we shared, just like this one, and all the things I find myself wanting to do to him now, while he’s standing in front of me. It doesn’t matter that it’s wrong. My body still hums with a fierce yearning for this man.

  Our past will always hang between us, cloak us, and it has become the very reason why I refuse to travel down this road again. If I learned one thing from our brief relationship, if I can call it that, it’s that Jason Tate takes everything he possibly can from you, and then leaves you bare, with nothing in return. I gave myself to him freely once, until he had all of me, and then I was left out in the cold. But this time I can’t risk that, no matter how right being with him feels. We’re two halves of the same soul. Or so I thought.

  “You shouldn’t be here,” I tell him, stepping away. I need the distance from him before he sucks me right back in again.

  “Why?” he asks. “Do I make you uncomfortable?”

  “Yes.”

  His expression changes to disapproval as he frowns. It’s obvious he wasn’t expecting my answer. I didn’t think I was expecting it either, or for it to be so honest.

  “Lace, I -” he starts, but a knock at the door cuts him off. I’m grateful for the interruption, not sure that I’m ready for what he might’ve said. Despite knowing that this is a conversation we’ll eventually have to have, I’m not ready to go back two years and rehash what transpired between us. My heart isn’t ready, and it took me coming back and seeing Jason again to realize that.

  I spin on my heel and open the front door, my mouth dropping when I see who it is. Her smile is wide, and she’s surrounded by luggage. The last time I saw her was on a computer screen.

  “Cass!” I shriek, throwing my arms around my best friend. I squeeze her hard. I’ve missed her so much it hurts.

  I pull back, and smile at her. “What are you doing here?”

  She lifts her aviators onto her head, her blonde hair falling around her face in waves. Her eyes are bright, and happy, despite the dark circles beneath them.

  “Did you think I was going to let you feed yourself to the sharks tonight without back-up?” she asks.

  Her arms wrap around me one more time, and I blink back tears. I feel closer to Cassandra than I do to my own biological sister. She’s proof that you don’t have to share blood to be family.

  “Daddy’s in town for business,” she says with a shrug, walking past me and further into my apartment. She drags her bags behind her and drops them in the foyer. “I told him I wanted to come see you, and you know he can’t say no to me.”

  When she turns around to look at me, she sees Jason and stops mid-stride.

  “Oops, did I interrupt something?” She raises her brows, and looks between me and Jason.

  “No,” I reply. “He was just leaving.” I give Jason a pointed stare and hope he catches my not-so-subtle hint.

  He simply smiles, and walks up to Cassandra with his hand outstretched. “He has a name,” he says smoothly, not missing a beat. “Jason Tate. It’s a pleasure to meet you.”

  I see the change in her stance immediately, but Jason keeps his smile, and easygoing stature. He doesn’t know what’s coming, and truthfully, neither do I. It’s not something you really see coming until it’s too late.

  Her hand comes up before I can stop it, and makes contact with his cheek, a loud smack echoing through the space around us. Jason rubs his face, his look of shock mirroring my own.

  “That is for breaking Lacy’s heart,” she says. Just when I thought it couldn’t get any weirder, she does the unthinkable and slaps him again on his other cheek.

  “And that,” she adds, “Is for leaving her and running away like a coward.”

  The room falls silent. I look between them, waiting to see what Jason will do.

  His mouth curves into a smile, and he says, “I like you.”

  Cassandra folds her arms across her chest. “Well the feeling ain’t mutual buddy. I believe Lacy told you to leave.”

  Jason straightens, and grabs his suit jacket from the counter. He walks towards me, his hands coming to rest on my forearms as he bends down to place a kiss on my cheek. My eyes flutter shut when his lips make contact with my flushed skin.

  “See you tonight,” he whispers. He pulls back, and I turn to watch him leave, wishing that I could rewind this entire morning and start over.

  “Well holy cheese on a cracker, that was intense,” Cassandra says, reminding me that she’s actually here, in my apartment. “I think I need a cold shower after that.”

  I laugh. “Don’t be silly. It was nothing.”

  She raises her eyebrows. “That was not nothing. It was enough to make a nun cream her granny panties.”

  We stare at each other for a brief moment before bursting into hysterics. It’s familiar, and it makes me feel…safe.

  “God, I’ve missed you,” Cassandra says, hugging me.

  “I’ve missed you too,” I reply. “You weren’t supposed to be here for a few more weeks.”

  With a shrug, she walks around my apartment, and scopes out the view from the living room window. “I know, but I didn’t want you to attend your birthday party without back-up. Bitchacho’s for life remember?”

  I nod, unable to stop the grin on my face. “I’m happy you’re here. Did you want to catch a nap?” She must be tired. Long flights can be brutal.

  “Don’t be ridiculous,” she replies. “We have some major shopping to do for tonight. After seeing Jason, I think we’ll have to pull out the big guns for the party.”

  I shake my head. “You’re crazy.”

  ‘I know,” she replies, lifting a shoulder. “But you love me. Now get that hot ass dressed so we can show the people of Chicago what shopping looks like. I took daddy’s credit card before his driver brought me here and I’m ready to do some damage.”

  “What do we need to buy?’ I ask loudly, slipping on a pair of skinny jeans, and a white long sleeve top. I throw my hair in a bun, and slip on my most comfortable flats. After applying some make-up, I meet Cassandra in the living room. She’s on the phone, and judging by the silly smile on her face, I bet its Kyle who’s on the other end.

  She says goodbye, and then turns to face me. “What did you say?”

  Instead of interrogating her about Kyle, I simply repeat my earlier question. “I asked, what do we need to buy?”

  “Something that’s going to leave Jason walking around with a raging hard on all night.”

  Chuckling, I ask, “Where exactly do we find that?”

  “We’ll know it when we see it. I won’t stop until what you’re wearing tonight is a hazard to all males.”

  I laugh as we exit my apartment, and head out into the city.

  With my best friend at my side, I feel ready to conquer the world.

  ***

  We’re busy getting ready for the party when Cassandra appears at my bathroom door. She leans against it, and then asks, “You never told me what happened with the lady you met at the publishing house. Was she interested in yo
ur book?”

  I finish applying my mascara, and then turn to face her. I’ve been trying to talk to her about this all day, but I’ve never found the right moment. I’ve also been nervous about my decision.

  “She was very interested,” I reply. “She gave me until Friday to let her know what I want to do.”

  “Have you decided?”

  I take a deep breath, and reply, “Yes. I think I’m going to publish it. But under L. Forbes.”

  Cassandra lets out a high-pitched squeal, and bounds over to me. She hugs me tightly, careful not to mess up our hair, and smiles at our reflection in the mirror.

  “I’m so proud of you, Lace. This is a big step, and the first thing you’ve ever done for yourself. When you hit the New York Times Bestseller’s list, and start going on book tours and stuff, I’m coming with. I’m your number 1 bitchacho.”

  I laugh, and squeeze her back. I owe so much more to her than I’ll ever admit.

  “Of course you’ll be there. Bitchacho’s for life remember?”

  “Well duh, someone has to keep your ass in line.” She winks, and disappears into my bedroom.

  I look down at my hands, and wonder if I’m doing the right thing. Then before I can stop myself, I type out an email to Paige, telling her I accept her offer.

  Cassandra’s right.

  This is for me.

  CHAPTER 10

  JASON

  I stop my Aston Martin DB9 just outside Lacy’s parent’s house, and find a spot to park. The driveway and front lawn are already littered with cars.

  When I walk in, guests are milling about, talking, and the band is playing renditions of songs by Nat King Cole and Frank Sinatra. I look around and notice that Lacy’s family has gone through a considerable amount of effort to decorate their home.

  All the furniture in the living room has been removed, making the palatial space look like a ballroom.

  It’s extravagant, with red and gold drapes hanging from the ceiling, and fairy lights that provide a soft, and whimsical feel. A ‘Happy 21st Birthday’ hangs above where the band is situated with red and gold balloons placed strategically across the room.