Facing the Storm

by Wilson, Yumoyori

  Malachi took a step forward to face me and reached out for my other hand. "Hottie. Lift your head."

  I did as he asked, my gaze meeting his proud eyes. "I get it. I understand what's going on, but I want you to be more confident. You've been training with your father. You know how to defend yourself; if you stall or begin to freak out, let your Kitsune help you. That's why she’s there. To help you when you're struggling and to protect you. Let's meet the Master Mage and get an understanding of who she is. Then you'll know the character of the person you're dealing with and her intentions in regards to training you. Alright?"

  I slowly nodded and rested my head on Malachi's shoulder. "I miss our jogs."

  "I miss them too, Hottie. I missed you a lot." His arms wrapped around my upper waist while I held back my tears. My heart ached at the time I'd missed with them. I missed us all being together, and even though we'd spent the last three days together, I greedily wanted more. A lot more.

  "Go and show Master Mage who is boss," Malachi whispered, pressing a soft kiss to the left side of my neck. He pulled back to look me in the eyes; his sky-blue orbs twinkled with joy and a serene smile on those loving lips. "And know that we're behind you. Regardless of what happens, we'll train you and make you as strong as possible."

  "You guys are so supportive," I grumbled with a pout, making Malachi laugh.

  "We'll always be supportive of you, Crimson. We're your set of matches to keep your fire burning." His husky voice shot heat through me and he tossed me a seductive wink.

  "Stop seducing Crim and move your ass."

  We looked back to see Quillian walking to where we stood, his hands in the pockets of his blue jeans. I smirked while Malachi groaned.

  "Why does everyone ruin my amazing moments. Go away," Malachi whined. He hugged me again like he was shielding me from Quil, who rolled his eyes.

  "Because you choose the most inconvenient times to flirt. Let's go and stop hogging Crim," Quil huffed.

  "I get to walk with her to the gate."

  "Not a chance hot ass."

  "It's Hottie McHot pants!"

  "Let me hug Crim." Quil groaned and Malachi pouted his lips but let go of me. I giggled quietly and the both of them stared at me in confusion.

  "You two love to bug one another. When do you stop?" I raised a brow as I waited on their replies. They exchanged looks and a sly grin formed on Quil's lips as he opened his arms to hug me.

  I moved into his embrace and took a deep inhale of his cologne before he whispered in my ear. "We stop when a certain Hottie is in bed with us."

  My face burned, and I loved the way his hot breath brushed against my ear. He pulled back slightly to kiss my cheek before he pulled out of the hug and slipped his hand into my left hand.

  "Let's go." Quil’s smile was wide as he urged me to start walking, leaving Malachi to catch up.

  "Matsu!"

  He caught up with ease and slid his hand in my right hand. I took a quick glance at both of them, noticing their pleased expressions which made my smile widen.

  Everything will work out. I just have to start believing.

  "Crimson Jiyuna. Are you ready?"

  I gave the tall woman standing before me a slight nod, my eyes taking in her magnificent looks in an attempt to ignore my fast beating heart.

  Chiyochi Na, Homatomashi's Master Mage stood before me. She was 6'2, with long white hair that reminded me of my Kitsune's white fur coat. She was in her half kitsune form; her white tails transitioned to a light teal and glowed with a golden aura.

  She was half Japanese and half black, having been saved from a village war that happened back in her home country by a Japanese soldier who worked in the palace.

  The man had taken in Chiyochi and her mother who was a single parent. Within two years they married, and the soldier had taken ChiyoChi in as his own. Since then, she trained to learn different fighting techniques to help ensure others learned how to defend themselves.

  The moment Aki introduced us, I could tell the power within her right away. It practically leaked off her, and it was contributing to my fidgeting. However, I got to see a hint of her kindness when she had to explain to Aki why we would be fighting without their presence.

  She may hide it well, but for a few seconds, the compassion that bled into her expression when talking to Aki told me that she respected his opinion and loved him. Not in a romantic sense, but like a mother would look at her son.

  After formal introductions were complete, ChiyoChi had given me and the others, who didn't know much about her, a summary of her life; it was time for me to take the test.

  I didn't have to change my clothes and had my twin swords hoisted on my back for extra support. My hair was left down, but my Kitsune remained in her spot, her tails wagging side to side from time to time as she remained half asleep.

  Even though I was a nervous wreck, this was my best bet for becoming stronger. I did trust in the guys to help me increase my strengths in each area they specialized in, but I knew right away Chiyochi could help me obtain the power I needed to reclaim the final crystal.

  Minzu and Urufu were somewhere around the property, but I knew if I needed them, they would come to my aid. I can do this. I just need to believe in myself.

  My Kitsune was rolling around in my head, looking impatient but silly at the same time. I could feel her anticipation, but she was being patient while having her own fun.

  "You are allowed to use any tactics to try and stop me. When one is unable to fight, whether it's from being cornered in a situation that would automatically mean death, or the inability to continue due to exhaustion, the test will be over. I will judge you based on your agility, magic power, physical combat, and the use of any special abilities or Kitsune. Any questions?"

  "No, Master," I replied firmly, my eyes 100% focused on her.

  I couldn't let the guys down. The room was soundproof, so they wouldn't hear our combat, but vibrations and magic pressure could still be felt outside those walls. I didn't want to worry them, and my ultimate goal was to impress them.

  "Let's begin," ChiyoChi announced and started to walk towards me. That was the first thing that confused me. She WALKED. She didn’t run or try to finish me off like you'd expect in a fight.

  My Kitsune had paused in her rolling fun, lying on her back as her pink eyes stared at the woman in confusion. I was just as lost and we watched her begin to walk around us in a wide circle. It was as if she analyzed us, just as we were analyzing her.

  There was a moment she'd stop and linger on a certain part of me, her eyes shifting from turquoise blue that reminded me of the sea, before she'd continue walking and they would transition to a dark purple like an eggplant.

  I didn't know if I needed my swords yet, but I pulled them out anyway, feeling the power vibrate through them as they began to power up; the symbols that resided on the silver metal of the blade lit up to a bright pink.

  "You have great power, child, but you hesitate to use it," ChiyoChi declared. I gulped as she stopped and faced me. "You hesitate because you're afraid of how powerful you can be."

  "That's...not true," I countered but bit my lip. My Kitsune was up now, moving to the border of the surface; her expression held a level of interest in the woman's words.

  "Isolation. Sadness. Loneliness. Fear," Chiyochi whispered. "You feel like isolating yourself from the world will give you time to process what has happened in your life and perhaps give you an opportunity to grow stronger while dealing with something that's left a wound on you. Both physically and mentally."

  My hands tightened on the hilt of my swords, trying to ignore the trembling in them as my eyes narrowed on this woman. Is she trying to break me down through her words?

  "The sadness that you try to hide is not due to what has hurt you, but what you perceive will be bestowed upon you when the men you love find out."

  "What are you doing?" I whispered, and she smiled in response.

  "The loneliness you feel confu
ses you. You're surrounded by people who love and cherish you for the person you have become. They love you, whether you feel like you're a damaged product that should be discarded when someone has used and abused your worth...setting you out to be wasted. However, their love doesn't reach you. Not entirely. Because you've put a barrier up...a shield to block their love from reaching you. Why? Simply due to those very feelings that rank you as unworthy."

  I moved then, dashing straight to her just as my Kitsune growled. We didn't want to hear her words. Couldn't stand to listen to the truth of them and acknowledge how painful it was to be read like an open book - our secrets being revealed one after another.

  She raised her hand to block my attack with ease; purple cherry blossoms appeared out of nowhere to shield my attack. My glaring blue eyes met her now green ones as she continued.

  "Fear. The very emotion that makes you react because it's your deepest secret that you're trying so desperately to avoid."

  "YAMERU!" I snapped in Japanese, my Kitsune rising to the surface. We jumped back before we dropped to the ground and used it as leverage to dash forward, cherry blossoms beginning to flutter down around us.

  ChiyoChi had a sad smile on her face which only irritated me more. She doesn't know me! Or my Kitsune. She doesn't understand anything. Isolation? I didn't isolate myself...I just took a break. I deserved it! That bastard hurt me! Sadness. Loneliness. Those are just emotions that come with being stuck in one place. Fear? I'm not afraid. She's just trying to distract me. Yes!

  My swords struck her shield of blossoms once more, but I kept attacking, striking blow after blow as the pink and purple cherry blossoms from both of us continued to rain down and come to our aid as I fought and ChiyoChi defended herself.

  "You're afraid of losing everything."

  "I'm not!"

  "You're scared of judgment, abandonment, and weakness. You don't want the people you love to judge your current weakness and abandon you. You love them to the point that you can't live without them. The fear that is now causing panic within you is losing it all and having to return to the life you once lived. A life filled with loneliness, sadness, and hopelessness."

  "CHINMOKU!" I snapped and found a perfect opening as I dropped down to slash at her feet. She jumped then, hovering above me as she summoned her cherry blossoms to assist her flight. My Kitsune growled, the sound vibrating through our throat as we pushed off the ground and used our power to support us as we got ready for the sword dance fight.

  My eyes widened when a whip materialized in her hand, my instincts telling me to cut it before I had to deal with the consequences later. My swords slashed against another barrier, and I used it to help me push off it when ChiyoChi lifted the handle of the black whip, that began to glow a dark teal.

  She whipped in my direction and I avoided it with ease, but my eyes grew wide when a whirlwind of power burst from her attack sending me flying into the wall. I cursed when my back hit the wall, the pain in my back coming back with force and disabling me for a second as I dropped to the floor. My Kitsune yelped, feeling my pain, and her pink eyes were filled with remorse.

  It's okay. Not your fault. I'd been foolish not to summon wind to slow my crash and now I was feeling the pain for it.

  ChiyoChi began her approach towards me, the hilt of her black whip in her left hand and the slick long thread in her right. "You're letting your emotions control your actions."

  "...I'm aware," I grumbled, hating the fact I just admitted it. I slowly stood up, outstretching my hands to call forth my swords that had fallen to my sides.

  They answered my call, shooting back into my trembling hold. My eyes were scanning for a way out, but I soon realized I was in the corner of the room and that alone was making me anxious. Too anxious to ignore the familiarity of the situation.

  I backed up to the wall where both ends met, my breaths uneven as I tried to think things through. You're fighting Crimson. This isn't the dungeon. That is ChiyoChi...not...Erica. You'll be fine. You won't lose.

  "You can't freeze in the middle of a battle, Crimson," ChiyoChi said softly, and in seconds she was in front of me. My swords were in defense mode before I could think, and I gritted my teeth, trying to hold off the crashing winds and purple blossoms that were doing their best to try and pin me against the wall.

  Pink blossoms began to dance around us in a circle, growing taller and taller in a way to shield off any escape ChiyoChi could make. I wouldn't let her run away, I'd just narrow the space until neither of us could move. I wouldn't be backed into the corner. I won't let her win...I promised to fight back. I. Will. Fight. BACK!

  My Kitsune roared, baring her teeth as she ran to take control once more; our white ears popped out while six tails emerged, glowing a dark pink as power whirled around us.

  ChiyoChi grinned and her ears twitched. She moved as far as my petal cyclone had allowed her and she lifted the handle of her whip and began to twirl it around above her bed.

  Purple petals formed within the closed space and I clenched my teeth as I felt the weight of her power and attempted to not freeze up again from the whip's threatening presence.

  My hair was flying everywhere, and I was struggling to stay in place. ChiyoChi’s whirlwind of purple blossoms picked up pace and power, overpowering mine within a minute. I decided to attack before I'd be lifted off my feet.

  I launched off the ground, using the power of the wind to give me a push to head straight for ChiyoChi who shot the tail of the whip at me. I lifted my swords to block the attack but crashed straight into another barrier she made.

  My eyes were locked on hers, and I knew right away I wouldn't win. However, that realization made me even angrier as tears began to form in my eyes. Why can't I be stronger? Why can't I defeat the people who try to hurt me? Why did I have to lose out on all this time that I could have trained to become the best I could be, but due to someone's selfishness for power, I was the victim of his actions and ultimately the weakest link in a group of men who'd throw their life on the line for me. WHY!

  ChiyoChi's eyes turned blue then, and her gaze softened. Just like that everything came to a stop: the winds, the petals, everything.

  My hands dropped in exhaustion and my swords clattered to the floor with a clanking sound. I was breathless, my shoulders moving up and down while tears rolled down my cheeks.

  I didn't dare move my eyes from the woman before me; the Master hadn't even broken a sweat whereas I had drops of it rolling down the sides of my face and beginning to drench my shirt.

  "Why do you question yourself, Crimson?" ChiyoChi whispered.

  "I should be stronger! Thanks to that man who I thought was my real father, I lost out on everything! From birth I was neglected. Only the times I got to spend with my mom, which were so few I can probably count them on my fingers, and the moments I remember with Jiyuna who I've now found out is my real dad, I lost out on all types of training. I watched in the shadows while shifters were trained to be the best. I was treated like an outsider and a disgrace that no one wanted to be in the same room as. Twenty-three years and I lost out on all of that! I can't even use my OWN swords that were supposed to be given to me 5 years ago!" I confessed, lifting my hands to wipe away my tears.

  "I feel so pathetic...so weak. I have to push myself to my limit because I don't have fucking time! I'm scared! I can't function without freezing up and no matter how desperately I want to fight back and protect myself, I fail! I have this amazing SSS affinity and a rare cherry blossom power, yet I can't even use it! My poor Kitsune has to be partnered with a girl who doesn't even know how to use her!"

  I lifted my gaze to glare at ChiyoChi as I shouted. "I was robbed of a life I should have received! A life that was MY RIGHT! Not a privilege I'm now getting 23 years later. How am I supposed to protect the men who'd lay everything on the line for me? How am I going to face these enemies or spies or whatever they are?! I couldn't...I couldn't even protect myself from that bastard Erica! I couldn't do anything be
cause I thought self-sacrifice was the smartest route. Now look at me! I can't even function when I see a damn whip! I can't be hugged or touched without someone asking me if it is ok. I want to be the best I can be, but HOW CAN I?!"

  I caught my breath and lowered my head, letting my tears fall as my sobs escaped me. "I want to be strong, Master ChiyoChi. I so desperately want to be able to bring change to this country. I want to heal...I want to laugh and hug and kiss the men who cherish me like no group of people have. I want to make my real dad happy and proud of me, and make sure my mom doesn't worry about me. I want to be able to apologize to my best friend for snapping at her. I just want my Kitsune, familiars, and self to be happy." The last sentence came out as a whisper.

  I stood there and cried, knowing that I'd failed. I couldn't damage her even a little bit, but she'd been able to break down my walls, both physically and mentally. I'd so desperately wanted power, but I knew I'd never obtain it in my current state. I would never be able to get the final crystal at this rate.

  I heard ChiyoChi sigh, and I closed my eyes and tensed, waiting for the disappointment in her voice as she told me I'd failed.

  Instead, arms wrapped gently around me, the scent of lavender and cherry blossoms enveloping me. Though I'd normally flinch or freak out by the sudden touch, it was the opposite- it was like a hug of a mother comforting her child, and that only made me cry harder.

  "Crimson. Life has not been fair to you, but you have tried your best to adapt to this new change. Some would run, while others would hide. Yet you've jumped into this world, not by choice, but for the sake of protecting those you love and cherish; you'd done your best to keep up. You have power and abilities that are finally blossoming inside you. All you need is time and patience to allow them to come forth."

  "I don't have time ChiyoChi. I don't...I need to get the crystal from N.R.O, and if I don't work harder, they'll come and try to kill those I love. I can't afford to lose anyone. I don't want to. My men...my lovers were used and left to be forgotten. They deserve better. I want to give them all of me and help them heal...but I'm just as wounded. Maybe even more so. I want to get better...I just don't know how in such a short period of time."