“I like that plan.”
“I have so many things to share with you.”
“I cannot wait.”
We climb out of bed and head into the bathroom. As she braids her hair, I admire her ass and find myself getting hard again. What the fuck is wrong with me? She turns and looks at me, smiling.
“What are you looking at?”
“Your gorgeous ass. I want to take a bite.”
“You’re welcome to do so.”
“I will take you up on that.” I walk towards her and wrap my arms around her waist. “You can use my toothbrush if you want to. I don’t mind.”
“I have one. I always do. I have a thing about brushing my teeth. I didn’t get an opportunity last night.”
“Worth it?”
“Absolutely worth it.”
I take her hand and guide her into the shower with me. Taking the soap, I rub it between my hands, and then glide it over her skin. Her nipples harden at my touch, which only turns me on even more. Her breathing is heavy as I move over every part of her body. When I get between her legs, she spreads them slightly and smiles. I pay special attention here, hoping she’ll be up for more the rest of the day. I can’t even believe how strongly I feel for her right now.
“Luca, you’re such an amazing lover.”
“It makes me so happy to bring you pleasure.”
“You do. Can I wash you now?”
I hand her the soap and she steps behind me, washing my back and my ass. Her fingers slip between my ass cheeks, causing me to hold my breath. It’s sexy and adventurous, something I wasn’t expecting from her. She walks in front of me and kisses my neck as her soapy hands glide across my body. When she gets to my cock, she grasps it and drives me crazy sliding it through her fingers. She watches my expression, and those sweet eyes of hers turn suddenly very sensual.
“You’re fucking sexy, Londyn. I love it.”
She doesn’t respond and dips her finger down low, in that crazy sensitive space between my balls and my ass.
“Fucccckkkk,” I say, exhaling. It’s impossible I could come again, but she’s making me feel like it could happen.
I pull her close to me and kiss her, my dick rubbing against her stomach. She’s driving me crazy. She moves her body against mine, getting me more and more excited.
Unbelievably, I start to feel the pressure building deep between my legs. Taking me in her hands once more, she strokes me as I lean against the tiles until finally I explode again. Her movement slows and when I open my eyes, she is watching me with a satisfied smile on her face.
“You enjoyed doing that to me, didn’t you?”
“Very much so.”
“You and I may be better suited for each other than I even knew.”
“I would agree.”
“Let’s finish up here.”
“Okay.” She turns to rinse off, but I grab her from behind and pull her into me.
“Thank you, angel.”
She giggles, twisting around. “You’re welcome.” Londyn rises up on her tiptoes and kisses my lips. “I hope you’ll refuel for later, though.”
“You can count on it.”
We finish washing and dry off. I give Londyn a shirt of mine to wear for the day and as expected, she looks amazing in it. She has just the right balance of angel and seductress.
“Coffee or tea?” I ask.
“Whatever you’re having,” she says as she sits at the small table I have in my breakfast nook. “I love your house. It’s so charming and sweet, yet very stylish.”
“I’m glad you like it. I want you to like being here.”
“I do. I always have.”
I start to make the pot of coffee and take some eggs out of the fridge. I decide to make a quick frittata. “Your place is nice.”
“Ah, yes, it is. My parents bought it for me. They insisted when I moved to America. They didn’t want me to live in a bad neighborhood. I was nearly forced to live with my brother, but once Madeleine decided to come they were okay with me living in my own place.”
“That’s very generous of them.”
“Yes. We didn’t have much growing up, but my dad is very frugal. He has saved a lot of money over the years. When his parents died, he was left a rather sizable sum that he split between Devon and I. My brother used his for schooling and I used mine to decorate my home.”
“Not schooling?”
Londyn blushes slightly. “My schooling was funded by scholarships. I’m very grateful.”
“That is not surprising. So you could use your money for fun things.”
“Yes. I still have enough for a wedding, though. My parents insisted I put it aside.”
“A wedding?”
“My mum has been dying for me to marry for several years. I keep telling her I’m too young and times are different than when she was my age. I told her I would feel ill prepared to care for a plant at this point, much less a husband and child.”
“I have a feeling you would do well at it.”
“Thank you.” She pushes her hair behind her ear and I want to attack her. “They liked you.”
“They did?”
“Oh, yes. My dad said you were a gentleman. My mum insisted I was in love with you. She saw it in my eyes.”
I stop scrambling the eggs for a moment. “I’ve been told several times recently that I have a look in my eyes whenever you are around.” I chuckle. “I thought I was playing it so cool.”
“You were. I was clueless.”
“Now you know.”
“Indeed.”
“What does Madeleine think of me?”
“Maddie thinks you are divine. She always has. Well, except when I came home in tears after the row you and Nico had.”
I frown. “Did she forgive me for that?”
“As long as I have, she’s happy.”
“And you have?”
“Well, since I spent the evening with your glorious penis buried inside of me, I would say we’ve moved past that.” She laughs and I laugh too.
“Maddie thinks you are sexy as hell,” she continues. “I didn’t see it the same way at first since I was so overwhelmed. I always knew you were attractive, but I was focused on being a good assistant.”
“And you are. Excellent, in fact.” I pour the eggs in a skillet then proceed to chop up a few vegetables. “When did you first know that there might be something between us?”
“Last night.”
I turn to her and smile. “You had to know before that.”
“Well, the night of the almost kiss I had hoped. I thought you might kiss me and I wanted it more than anything in the world. When you didn’t, I assumed you just lost yourself for a moment.”
“I wanted to kiss you so very badly. I thought about it all night. I was just scared.”
“Of what?”
“Of fucking it all up. I’ve previously alluded that I am not good at this whole love game. I’m actually happy you were angry with me last night and we got it all out in the open.” I sprinkle the vegetables on the eggs and pour two cups of coffee. “Last night, I was planning to tell you how I feel about you no matter what, but I didn’t know how. Our little argument forced it out of me.”
“I cannot believe you thought I was with Nico.”
“A reflection on him, not you.”
She nods. “So, when did you know you had feelings for me?”
“I don’t remember exactly, but it’s been a long time. You crept up on me. By the time I realized I was falling for you it was too late to do anything about it.” I smile at her. “Not that I wanted to.”
“Who was the girl you were with that night?”
“I have a lot to tell you about that. Let’s eat first, no?”
“Sure.”
I slice the frittata and put it on plates for both of us. Joining Londyn at the table, I sit down and eat quietly. She eats too, but keeps her attention focused solely on me. The loving look in her eyes reassures me that I can tell her whatever I want t
o. I need to start at the beginning.
After breakfast, we move to the living room and I prepare to tell her about my life. Taking a deep breath, I begin.
“Ten years ago something very bad happened and I’ve never been the same.”
Londyn reaches out and rubs my hand. “I’m listening.”
“I killed my girlfriend.”
“WHAT?!” I ASK, STARTLED.
“I didn’t mean to, of course. There was an accident and when it was all over, she was dead.”
“Oh, Luca.” I don’t know what else to say.
“We were heading to my parents’ house in Cape Cod. It was Christmas Eve. At that time, it was a summer home and I thought it would be romantic for just the two of us to go there.”
I nod my head.
“I was going to propose that night.” Luca looks up at me and his eyes are filled with so much sadness, I almost start to cry.
“We had been dating for several years and I knew she was the one. I had the ring and I had asked her father for his blessing.”
“What happened?”
“We had gone to dinner first and I had a few drinks to calm my nerves. It’s about an hour drive to the Cape, but once we started driving, the snow was coming down pretty hard. I was trying to be careful, but I hit some ice and lost control of the car. We flipped and rolled a few times and when we stopped, she wasn’t sitting next to me anymore. It was dark and the visibility was so bad. I climbed out of the car and looked everywhere for her. I found her on the side of the road, barely alive.”
My heart hurts as he speaks and tears fill my eyes. He doesn’t look at me.
“I didn’t know what to do. I pulled her into my arms and cried. I was frozen with grief. In a panic, I called Nico and told him what was happening. He told me to stay where we were and he would be there as quickly as possible. He said not to call the police.”
Luca lowers his head and clasps his hands tightly together. I can tell that this is extremely difficult for him to tell me.
“I’ve never told anyone this story before. Nico and I had a plan and I’ve never strayed from it all these years. Neither has he.” He glances up at me briefly then looks down again. “I want to tell you, though. I want you to know everything about me and why I am the way I am. And then I pray to God that you still want me.”
“Luca, it’s okay.”
“When Nico got there, he realized I’d had more to drink than I thought. We worried I would be arrested and charged with manslaughter or worse. Nico decided that we should say he was driving. We would tell everyone Nico drove us so I could focus on my girl and he lost control on some ice.” He lowers his head again before looking back at me. “Londyn, I was so grief stricken I agreed. I sat on the side of that road and watched the life slip away from the woman I loved. There was nothing I could do to save her and it killed me inside. She died and I barely had a fucking scratch on me.”
“What was her name?” I ask, softly. Luca pauses, as though it is difficult for him to actually say it. I rub his back to encourage him.
“Sara.” As soon as he says the word, tears slide down his cheeks and my heart aches for him.
“Nico drove his car to a nearby store and walked back. When he returned he called for help and when the paramedics arrived, he told them our story. I sat there and didn’t say a word. He told them that Sara got car sick so she was sitting up front and I was in back. He said we didn’t know how she was knocked out of the car. The lies just kept piling up.” Luca rubs his forehead and my stomach clenches with anticipation of what I will hear next. “It took the paramedics twenty minutes to get her away from me. I couldn’t let her go. I watched them cover her up and I lost it. I had to be sedated and hospitalized for two days. By the time I woke up, Nico had been charged with reckless driving and vehicular manslaughter.”
I cover my mouth and gasp. This story gets worse by the moment.
“Nico told me no matter what, we stick with the story. He was young and it was going to be alright. He worried that it would ruin my career plans and he didn’t want that for me. He told me it was an accident and that he would be okay.” Luca looks up at me with an intense gaze. “That’s not what happened.”
“What happened?”
“It was ugly. It was ruled that careless driving was involved and the charges would not be dropped. My parents blew through their savings paying for Nico’s defense. It took years to clear him, but not until he spent six months in jail and two years on probation. He accepted a plea that reduced his sentence. It nearly ruined his life.”
I have no idea how to respond. I am simply shocked.
“Nico never changed his story and wouldn’t allow me to do it. I always wondered why no one ever questioned why Nico was with us, but they didn’t. We were close and I guess it wasn’t farfetched that he would help me with my proposal. Nico said it would be worse for all of us if I admitted it was me who was driving. Mom and Dad and Sara’s family would be devastated. We had to keep the lie going. I’m sure you can imagine how much guilt I felt. And still do.”
I nod.
“When it was finally over, my parents were broke. My brother had been put through the ringer and served time for a mistake I made and my Sara was dead. I shut myself off from my family, from Nico, and anything associated with her. Everyone chalked it up to depression, but it wasn’t that. It was pain and guilt and there was no way I could forgive myself for it.”
“That’s why it’s hard for you and Nico?”
“Yes. Nico says he accepts what happened. It was his idea, but every time I look at him, that night is the first thing I see. I see Sara looking up at me, tears streaming from her eyes, as her last breaths leave her body.” He looks up at me. “She looked so perfect, even then. Except for a few cuts, nothing was wrong with her on the outside. I didn’t understand how she died.”
“How did she?”
“Internal injuries. She wasn’t wearing her seat belt and that is how she was thrown from the car. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve wished I died that night with her. The pain has been unbearable.”
“I can’t imagine. Nico isn’t angry with you?”
“No, he’s not. He’s desperate for my love and affection that I cannot give. I see my parents and feel guilty for lying to them. I’ve tried to make myself feel better by financing their needs over the years, but it feels like blood money. The only person I can handle is Clara. That’s who you saw me with.”
“Who is Clara?”
“Sara’s twin sister.”
“Oh. Does she know what really happened?”
“No. Everyone thinks that my guilt is because I wanted to go to the Cape that night. I insisted even during a snowstorm. No one knows except Nico and me. And now you.” He sits up and takes a deep breath. “I haven’t been able to put my guard down since she died. I compared every woman I met to her and they never matched up. I had a few relationships that I was hopeful would work out, but as soon as there was a chance things could turn serious, I bailed. I just didn’t think that I would ever be able to love again. That’s why I was so afraid of you.”
“What changed?”
“I don’t know. You came into my life in this sweet, quiet way and just seeped into my soul. All of a sudden, you consumed my thoughts and I began to crave interactions with you. Before I knew it, I realized that what I was feeling was love.” Luca brushes his thumb across my cheek. “You have something about you, Londyn, something that has been so healing to me. You’re the first person I’ve ever wanted to tell about Sara. Because of you, I’m able to say her name out loud. Do you realize I haven’t even been able to think her name much less say it? I swear to God she sent you to me.”
I cannot hold back my tears anymore and I bury my face in his chest. Nico told me if Luca ever opened up about this, it meant I was special. I am floored. Luca strokes my hair, shushing me and holding me tight.
“Do you think I’m a monster now?”
“A monster?” I look up.
“Heavens, no. I am heartbroken for you. I can’t imagine the pain you’ve felt over this. I want to take it all away from you.”
“You do, Londyn, don’t you see? You do. Because of you, I’m opening my heart to love. Do you remember that night you were here and I broke that dish?”
“Yes.”
“I dropped it because of the thought I had. I realized that the reason you were getting to me is because you understood me. We have so much in common and I felt so comfortable with you. It was like it was with Sara and it floored me.”
“I don’t know what to say.”
“Look at me.” I lift my face up so our eyes meet. “You are the first woman I haven’t compared to her. I’ve been trying to find her replacement for years and no one could be that for me. You came into my life and created something new. You were my friend first and that friendship changed me. You made me see that I am capable of loving someone. You made me see that I can’t replace what was lost, but I can have something just as wonderful. I can love again. I do love again. I love you.”
Luca wipes away my tears and plants a gentle kiss on my lips. He pulls me close and we cry together. I am overwhelmed by the depth of emotion coursing through me.
“Londyn,” he whispers, “My angel, you are saving my life.”
Laying my head against his chest, I try desperately to comprehend his words.
“You’re so quiet. Have I upset you?” he asks.
“No, not at all.” I turn my face up to his. “I am astonished and honored that you would share this part of your life with me. I feel special and cherished and I want you to feel those emotions, too. I want you to feel safe with me. You can trust me with your heart. I will protect it.”
“I already know this. It’s why I knew I could tell you. It’s liberating to say the words out loud. Sara has been a lingering ghost for me. There hasn’t been room in my heart for anyone else. For the first time since it happened I feel forgiven.”
“By Sara?”
He nods. “Yes. I was meant to find you, Londyn.”
“I believe that too,” I whisper.
“You don’t feel differently about me now?”
“Yes, I do.” Luca’s face falls and I offer a smile. “I love you even more. It takes a strong man to show such vulnerability and pain. I’ll do my best to kiss it away and love you as hard as I can.”
Londyn Falls Page 30