by Ali Parker
I needed to keep myself on lockdown so my newest obsession didn't think any less of me. I was a well-rounded guy, but not taking care of myself for so long had me twitching for more of her.
"No. I'm sure they're just having a fuckfest." She walked into the kitchen as Olivia turned around from the dining room table.
"Who's having a fuckfest? I wanna go."
I chuckled. "Jackie, Dana's friend that we came up from Dallas with."
"She's fine. We'll get ahold of her later." Dana shrugged. "We're headed to Central Park. You wanna come with us?"
Olivia shook her head. "No. You guys go have fun. I just wanna lounge around. I'll see you after awhile when you get back."
"Suit yourself." Dana winked at her friend and walked to the door. "Come on, handsome. Let's go make out behind a tree."
"The cops will fine you." Olivia gave us a cheeky grin. Something told me that she knew from experience.
"Might be worth it." I took Dana's hand as we walked out into the hall. Being with her in another place where I could breathe easy was exactly what I needed most. We'd have to make our out of town trips a regular occurrence.
Or I could go work for Damon. I might actually enjoy it.
It was a thought if nothing else. There was comfort in knowing that I might be getting closer to trying something new - something less restrictive - something that would open the door to usher love in the way I wanted it. The way I needed it.
Chapter 34
Dana
"It's beautiful out here." I breathed in deeply and intertwined my fingers with Kendal's as we walked down the main path in Central Park. A slight breeze blew along my neck, tickling my skin and leaving me feeling like I could take flight.
"Most beautiful thing I've ever seen." His eyes were on me.
I rolled my eyes and snuggled against his side. "Thank you for coming here with me. I really needed this."
"Don't thank me. I'm enjoying myself a lot. I feel like I can breathe for the first time in a long time." He released me and moved over to sit down on one of the many benches around us. "Come here and let me hold you."
"I like the sound of that." I moved toward him and turned, sitting down beside him and leaning into his warmth. "Were you really going to walk away from us when you saw my name on your schedule?"
"Absolutely." He let out a slow sigh. "I didn't feel like I had a choice. I still feel a little off having to sneak around behind the school's back, but Damon was right. I have to start living my life soon before there isn't much of it left to live."
"Tell me about Ana?" I glanced up at him and waited patiently as he seemed to work through a million emotions.
"What do you wanna know?" He glanced down at me, his eyes sweeping down toward my mouth as if he were lost in his need to kiss me repeatedly. It was mesmerizing.
"Did you love her?"
"Yes. With all of my heart." He leaned down and kissed me softly. "I hadn't really been in love before her, and I fell hard. Deep."
"Do you still love her?" I pressed my hand to his chest as he moved in for another kiss.
"No." He moved back and rested against the wooden bench beneath us. "I stopped years ago. She drove a dagger into my chest with her denial of our relationship. I have no clue what turned the tides for her or why she stopped believing in us as a couple, but somewhere along the way, she gave up on us. On me."
The pain in his face was palpable. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have brought it up."
He turned his attention back toward me. "No, I'm glad you did. I want you to know everything."
"Then tell me anything you want to tell me about her or anything else."
"Okay. Well, I grew up in a loving family and just had Mandy as my only sibling. She didn't have MS until she was a teenager, which was a shock to all of us. Before that she was so full of life, so fun and joyful. I'd try to pick on her and start fights because I was an asshole boy, but she never let me have my way with anything. I always bent when she started poking and prodding, especially after she got MS."
I reached over and ran my hand over his chest as I rested my head against his shoulder. "And you became her sole caregiver after your parents died."
"Yeah." He wrapped his arm around my shoulders and brushed his lips by my forehead. "I'd have done anything for her. I wish she could be here now to experience the simple things, you know?"
"So many people take them for granted." I touched the side of his face, running my fingers by the dark brown stubble that covered his cheeks and chin.
"That's why I decided to bend my rules. Life is too goddamn short and you never know when it's going to be snatched away from you. Where I still feel a little off sneaking around, I can't imagine not working through this with you. You light me up in ways I thought were forever dead."
I smiled and let out a content sigh. "Are Damon and Bethany getting married?"
"They sure are. I was just on the phone with Damon back at Olivia's place before you walked in. He wants to go shopping for the tuxes soon."
"Fun! I wanna go."
"Absolutely. I'd love for you to meet Damon's brother Matt. He's quite a character."
"How so?"
"He's the artsy type. Loves to paint and sing, but looks like a quarterback for the Dallas Cowboys. You'd never imagine him holing up in a paint studio unless you really knew him."
"What's he do for a living?" I sat up and stretched my arms toward the sky as a yawn bubbled up inside of me. Being around Kendal was relaxing, almost too much so.
"He lives off his dad's money." Kendal stood up and bounced on the balls of his feet. "I think he's getting ready to move to Seattle, but we'll see how that goes. Matt's the noncommittal type. He always has been."
"This coming from a man who has rules that guard his life."
"Hey. Those rules protect me." He reached down and helped me up before pulling me close. "I have a spiel I give everyone who comes close to me too. You wanna hear it?"
"A spiel?" I laughed as delight raced through me. "Like something you've memorized?"
"Yep. I gave it to Bethany when she started to TA for me, just in case."
"Even though she was dating your best friend?"
"I didn't know that at the time. It's a small world, right?"
"Give me the spiel." I lifted to my toes and kissed him quickly on the lips before moving back and crossing my arms over my chest. "And do it like you would if I were your new student."
"Speaking of... did you drop your mini-mester class that I'm teaching or are you still planning on taking the class?"
"I haven't dropped it yet, but we'll see what happens. Eight months all of a sudden feels like fifteen years. I'm not sure what I'm going to do."
"Don't do anything irrational please." He reached for my hand. "We'll figure it out together."
"I know. Give me the spiel. Impress me."
"Right." He cleared his throat as I lifted my hand.
"Wait. Let me play the part."
The confused look on his face was almost too cute. "Okay..."
I closed the gap between us and put my back to him, bending down a little and rubbing my ass over the thick bulge between his thighs as I glanced up at him over my shoulder.
"Hi Dr. Tarrington. I'm your new TA. If you need anything and I do mean anything... don't hesitate to ask."
"That's not fair." He wrapped his arms around me and leaned down to kiss my ear. "How about your legs spread wide and your tits spilling out of the top of your cute little shirt?"
I yelped and turned around, smacking him playfully. "You're horrid!"
"You love it." He seemed so full of himself, and sadly enough... I did love it. I could see why working at the college was so incredibly dangerous for him. "You ready for the spiel, you naughty little TA?"
"Lay it on me."
His eyebrow lifted and he shook his head before clearing his voice. "I'm thirty-one. I'm not a model, nor do I care to be. I'm a guy that loves math, football and I'm an extreme stickler fo
r the rules. I don't date students or TAs, so keep things staunchly professional between us, or I'll dismiss you."
I couldn't help but laugh out loud. He was beyond cute.
"If you really think that's going to keep someone away, you've lost your mind. That would make me want to get closer."
"That's because you're a bad girl pretending to be innocent." He pulled me close again. The thick press of his arousal against my stomach forced my body to grow warm.
"You think so?" I wrapped my arms around his neck and pulled him down toward me.
"Mmmhmmm." He pressed his lips to mine and ran his hands up and down my back, pressing into my muscles and massaging away any tension I was carrying with me.
"Are you really thirty-one? You old man." I laughed as he gave me a stern look.
"See? Completely bad girl."
"Only because you make me one." I kissed him again before releasing him. My phone was going off in my pocket, which was a good sign. "Hopefully this is Jackie." I pulled it out and answered it. "Hello?"
"Hey. It's me." Jackie. "Sorry for not answering earlier. Parks was showing me around the city, the hospital and the inside of his penthouse apartment, which is awesome!"
"Nice. Are you guys wanting to get together for a drink tonight?"
"Ummm... I don't know. I'll ask him and text you later. Would that be okay?"
"Of course. Just let me know."
"Thanks, Dana! You're the best friend a girl could have."
We hung up and I gave Kendal a look. "I really hate that she's spending the weekend with this guy."
"He that bad?"
"Worse." I tucked my phone back into my pocket and motioned for him to join me as we walked deeper into the park. "He fucked her a good ten times over a four-day period when he was visiting and most of those times were at the hospital."
"Is it horrid to say how hot that is?"
I snorted. "Yes."
"Then it's just deplorable. Creepy bastard." He wagged his eyebrows, causing me to soften even more toward him.
"She's falling in love with him, or at least the idea of him." I slipped my arm into Kendal's, wanting the touch of his skin against mine seeing that I wouldn't get it for a while once we got back home.
"And he's not the type to reciprocate the feeling, I suppose?"
"Not at all. He left town without giving her his number, he didn't call, he doesn't care." I ran my hand over the top of my head and exhaled loudly. "He's a playboy and Jackie doesn't seem to mind, but she's going to lose her shit when we get back home and he goes back to ignoring her."
"I'm not trying to be a dick at all here, but when women throw themselves at a guy, the guy usually takes advantage of that and keeps moving on. I mean, honestly, if Jackie were willing to throw herself at this Parks guy, then who else is she opening her legs to?"
"What? No one." I jerked back as if he'd slapped me.
"Just hear me out." He reached out and gripped my shoulders. "I'd never give Heather the time of day because of who she is. She doesn't respect me or herself. She cares about an hour of passion so that her icy heart will melt and feel something for a few minutes. If she's looking for that hour with me, then who else is she looking for it with?"
I forced myself to relax. "I agree, but in the world we live in right now, being a prude doesn't get you any favors. Not opening your legs on the first date is almost like a sentence to be forever alone. I can see why Jackie did what she did... and honestly, why Heather does what she does."
He nodded. "Maybe you're right. It's all just a big game anyway."
"One I'm glad we're not playing anymore." I moved into his arms and glanced up at him. "I don't want lust nearly as much as I want love."
"Agreed." He leaned down and kissed me a few times. "How about a fifty-fifty partnership. Half love and half lust? A relationship where your heart is filled with all the warmth it can handle, and your body still percolates when I walk in the room because you know what I'm capable of."
"I do?" I teased him as he gave me a cocky grin.
"If you're not aware, then maybe we should cut this stroll in the park short. I'm quite capable of slinging you over my shoulder and spanking your ass all the way back to Olivia's."
"And then what would you do once you got me there?" Love and lust were definitely taking turns pulling at my emotions each time Kendal was around. I wasn't sure which was winning out, but the battle between them was exhilarating.
"Drown you in kisses, open you up like a flower and force you to cry out my name until your throat hurt."
"Wow." My pulse spiked and my legs felt weak. "Can we do that soon?"
"How about now?" He bent down and picked me up again, surprising me and yet not.
He was a helpless romantic, whether he knew it or not.
Chapter 35
Kendal
The flight home was a bit of a blur after staying up most of the night before making love to Dana. The way she took me left me wanting to promise her the world, but I held my tongue. We would be together soon no matter how it happened. I could be mature enough in our new relationship to take things day by day. That was the only way Damon and Bethany were surviving.
It would work for us too.
I left her and Jackie at the airport in Dallas and spent the rest of the evening lying around my place, reliving the weekend in my head. Monday morning couldn't come fast enough. At least by being busy, I could force myself to think about something other than being drastic and leaving UT. Having her in my life left me wanting to consider all the possible options to us moving forward. I felt like a basket case by the time the alarm went off Monday morning.
I showered quickly and changed into a pair of slacks and a pressed button down shirt before heading to the campus on my bike. It wasn't exactly frowned upon, but I knew it would do me no favors with the students or the faculty. Everyone could bite it as far as I was concerned. I needed to feel alive more than I needed acceptance.
After locking up the bike behind the business building in the faculty lot, I walked as if I had purpose toward my office. It was the best way to keep people at bay. Just look busy or occupied in thought.
I made it to my office without being bothered, which was a miracle of sorts.
Someone cleared their throat just outside my door and caused me to turn from staring at my bookshelf.
"Dr. Turner. How are you?" I offered her a warm smile and nodded to the chair across from my desk. "Come on in. Make yourself at home."
"Eliza, please." She pulled the chair toward her and sat down gracefully. The older woman could be my mother and yet I considered her a dear friend and the only mentor I truly had.
"Now, just a minute." I tapped my lips and pretended to be lost in thought. "I'm pretty sure you told me to call you Dr. Turner the last time we spoke."
"Must have been someone else." She shrugged and gave me a quirky smile. "Tell me that you finally spoke with Mark about this situation you've been dealing with."
"No." I sat down in my chair and leaned back. "I really don't want to start anything, Eliza. Heather hasn't been around much, and I think I've earned a little bit of sympathy because of my sister passing."
"Right, well, I'm so sorry about your sister. Several of us came to the funeral, but didn't want to bother you in the middle of your grief."
"Thank you. I appreciate the support." I clasped my hands and laid them on top of my desk. "Mark is actually asking me to draw closer to Heather, which I don't plan to do."
Her voice dropped as her eyes narrowed. "Draw closer, how?"
"We're co-sponsoring Beta Alpha Psi, which is honestly the last thing I need to do. Their president is a bit of a..." I searched for the right word seeing who was sitting in front of me. Being vulgar was out.
"A skank." She crossed her arms over her chest. "Neither of you need to be involved in BAP. It's time consuming and you've just lost your sister and Heather is brand new. What was the purpose in that?"
Her frustration was pa
lpable, and I couldn't help but wonder where it was coming from. Had something else happened that had her on edge? There were always school politics running amuck, fucking up everyone’s plans, but she seemed a little too sensitive for her usually calm demeanor.
"Heather's father has some additional funds that I believe he's looking at spending in the world of academia. I think the business school dean is putting pressure on Mark to make sure they are spent here. Part of that is keeping Heather happy."
"And he wanted you to do that?" Her expression tightened as her cheeks burned pink. "That's absurd!"
"Hey..." I tilted my head to the side and studied her. "What's going on with you? You seem way more on edge than usual. Did something happen? What did I miss?"
She closed her eyes and let out a long sigh before pressing her hands to her face. "I just feel like everything is falling apart. I should have taken the dean position last year when they asked me to, but I didn't want the burden of working so goddamn much. And now... ugh."
"And now, what? You can't keep worrying about me and Heather. I'm going to work all of it out, Eliza. I'm a smart guy."
"It's not about you being smart, Kendal." She glanced up. "I had lunch with Daisy Jackson last week. I wanted to know why the hell she just upped and quit. She was a great professor, and between me and you, a good friend."
"And?" I glanced up as Heather moved into the doorway behind Eliza. "Morning, Heather."
Eliza stiffened and smiled before getting up. "Well, I still think you should take some time for yourself, Kendal. It's a lot to put on anyone... even you."
"Thank you." I stood up, wishing like hell that she wouldn’t go. I wanted to know what happened with Daisy and why she was so fired up. "I'll come see you later?"
"Yes. If you can catch me around." She moved around Heather without a word and walked out into the hallway.
"I don't think the old bat likes me." Heather shrugged and moved to stand in front of my desk. She leaned over and pressed her balled up fists to my desktop, opening her blouse beautifully for anyone who might want to see what she looked like under her clothes.