Surrender

by D H Sidebottom

  He nodded in greeting, poured his coffee then sat opposite me, nursing his cup. “How’s she coping?” he asked.

  I sighed. “Better than I thought she would, actually.”

  He nodded. “She’s always been strong. Gets her strength from her mother.”

  I smiled and tipped my head. “Oh, I don’t know Jeffery. I’d say, knowing what you’ve been through lately, that she gets parts of it from you.”

  He looked down at his coffee. “I don’t feel very strong, Jake. In fact, I feel like a fucking failure.”

  Reaching across the table, I patted his hand. “You’re far from a failure. What you did for Isla all those years ago, there’s not many men who would have coped with that.”

  He shrugged. “It was never enough though.”

  Whilst we were on the subject, I took a deep breath. “I wanted to talk to you about that.”

  He lifted his eyes to me then nodded, instructing me to go on. Glancing at the door to make sure we were alone, I made sure to keep my voice low. “I need to know where he is.”

  Jeffery snapped his narrow eyes to mine, knowing I was referring to Dwaine’s body. “Why?”

  “I need to make sure he’s . . . still there.”

  “What?”

  “Jeffery, there’s a reason this is happening to your family. I have a feeling this is something to do with what happened that New Year. I told Isla last night and I think you need to know. Dwaine Tyler was my stepbrother.”

  His eyes widened as he spluttered on a mouthful of coffee he’d just gulped down. I shook my head. “Don’t worry, if Isla hadn’t done what she did, I would have. But all this doesn’t make sense. It’s been ten years. First Seb’s murder and now Marianne’s in such a short time frame. The video was sent to Isla, not you, so it’s obvious this is something personal against her. I need to sort this quickly, if you get my drift.”

  Jeffery nodded. “Aye lad, I understand.” He sighed and leaned towards me. “I need to say one thing though.” I gave him a simple nod. “You hurt my daughter, after everything she has been through, and I will be digging another grave. You understand?”

  “I understand.”

  We eyed each other for a while before he gave me a slight nod and stood up. “Well come on,” he mumbled when I remained seated. “We have work to do.”

  I downed my coffee, left Isla a note to say I’d taken her dad for some more clothes then went to excavate a body. A typical day in my life really.

  OPENING THE FRONT DOOR, I smiled at Dr Lovejoy. “Hello Isla,” he murmured as he drew me into his embrace. He sighed in my ear. “You have no idea how unbelievably sorry I am. Your mother meant a great deal to me.”

  I nodded, pulling away and gesturing for him to follow me through to the kitchen. “I know, Doctor.”

  Turning my back on him, I filled the kettle and swallowed nervously. Jake hadn’t been open about Dr Lovejoy but he’d made it obvious he didn’t trust him, especially since he had hastily pulled my mother out of The Grange once he’d dug into the doctor’s background. Now I was nervous around a man who I had known and grown to care for over the previous ten years. It angered me that Jake had managed to manipulate my feelings so quickly but wouldn’t divulge what it was that made him take control over my mother’s residency.

  “Is there any news from the police yet?” Dr Lovejoy asked as I placed his coffee and sugar on the table.

  Shaking my head, I sighed and sat opposite him, again hating the fear Jake had drilled into me for no obvious reason. “No. They’ve released Seb’s body for burial though.”

  “When is the funeral? I would like to attend.”

  I smiled gratefully. “Friday, and thank you, I appreciate it.”

  “And how are you, Isla?”

  I shrugged, taking a sip of my tea. “Oh, you know . . .”

  He nodded, not needing me to explain. “Have you thought any more about my proposition?”

  “Not yet.”

  He sighed, something flashing in his eyes but it was gone as quick as it came. “I understand your hesitancy but I promise, it will help not only me but you come to terms with what happened and what you did, Isla. I really think, especially now, that talking over things would be of great benefit to you.”

  “Maybe,” I mumbled. “Maybe not.”

  He watched me over the rim of his cup whilst he took a drink, his eyes narrow and probing. I shifted uncomfortably. “Is everything okay, Isla, you seem a little . . . off?”

  Masking my unexplained anguish I blinked at him as if he’d offended me. “I’ve just lost my mother. Of course things aren’t okay right now.”

  He stiffened, a glimpse of anger glinting in his eyes. I was growing nervous. My insides fluttering wildly I knew it was only because Jake had instilled the doubt in my head.

  “I apologise,” he said stiffly, making me feel like a bitch.

  “No, I’m sorry.”

  He smiled warmly, nodding as he reached across and took my hand in his. “I understand, Isla. I’ll miss her as much as you will. She was a great lady.”

  Tears sprung in my eyes. “Thank you, and yes she was.”

  Dr Lovejoy snatched his hand away when the door opened and Henry, the bodyguard Jake had insisted stay near me, walked into the room. He glanced at me then fixed his stare on Dr Lovejoy as he took position against the wall. “Don’t mind me, sir,” Henry said with a smug smirk. “Just doing my job. Carry on.”

  “Is everything okay, Henry?” I asked quietly.

  “Everything’s fine, ma’am. Mr Devine has been in contact and he asked me to inform you that he and your father are returning now.”

  I nodded, sensing his watchful dislike of Dr Lovejoy and his hidden message that he had informed Jake of Dr Lovejoy’s visit. It was clear that Jake wasn’t too happy about the doc’s attendance and had sent Henry in to watch me when he usually just stayed out of my way. “Okay, thank you.”

  The doctor stood abruptly, making me jump. “Well, I have to be off. I just wanted to pass on my condolences.” He bent towards me, kissing me on the cheek. Henry took a step forward. “I’ll see you at Sebastian’s funeral. Take care, Isla.”

  “And you, Doctor,” I said with a genuine smile. “Thank you for coming.”

  “I’ll show you out,” Henry offered with a chilling smile. I frowned at him but he ignored me. “If you’d care to follow me, sir.”

  Dr Lovejoy frowned for a moment, then gave me a final smile and followed Henry out.

  I shot to the window and pulled back the curtain stealthily, looking to make sure the doctor actually got into his car and left. I had the awful feeling that Henry was going to pop him off and bury him in my back garden.

  Tutting at my rampant imagination when I watched Dr Lovejoy climb into his car and pull away, I blew out a breath and went to search for Henry.

  “What the hell was that about?” I snapped when I found him standing by the front door.

  He regarded me with a quirked eyebrow. “I’m sorry, ma’am, I don’t follow.”

  “Like hell you don’t! You made sure you gave Dr Lovejoy the heebie jeebies!”

  He sucked on his lips and lifted his brow further. “The heebie jeebies?”

  “Oh, don’t take the piss! You know what I mean!”

  He attempted to control his grin, my umbrage obviously amusing him. “Just following orders, ma’am.”

  “By that I presume you mean just doing what Jake tells you to!”

  He shrugged. “He pays my wages, I’m afraid, so that makes him the one to direct my orders.”

  “And did Jake ask you to report everything?” His silence answered my question. “Un-fucking-believable! Dr Lovejoy is a friend!”

  “You’ll have to take that up with Mr Devine, Miss Cormack.”

  “Oh, don’t worry, I will.”

  Jake and my father walked back in just as the police were leaving. Jake smirked at Sergeant Brook, who told me he was from CID and was taking over the murders of Seb and my mum
.

  “Well, well, I should have known this had your name written all over it, Devine.” Sergeant Brook sneered.

  That did not help my mood. It had already been black before Sergeant Brook and his cronies had arrived. He’d commented about how my property was on the Deviant site, insinuating sneakily about me being one of Jake’s whores. My brother and mother had just been murdered but his lack of sympathy had confused me; now I understood why.

  Jake laughed but nodded. “And is my father’s name tattooed all over your backside yet, Brook? Your arsehole would make the perfect ‘O’ for ‘God.’”

  Brook tensed, his eyes narrowing as he took a step into Jake. “If I find your name attached to any evidence that comes up, I’ll personally make sure you’re warming a cell in Wakefield for a very long time, you arrogant fuck!”

  Jake laughed again and shrugged. “I’ll make sure my father is aware of your threat, Sergeant Brook.”

  Brook glared at Jake and for a brief moment, I thought he was going to commit his own murder in my new front room but his partner, an older man who gave me the creeps the way he had remained silent throughout the whole of Brook’s interview, took his arm and dragged him out, closely followed by the two timid uniformed police officers.

  “Prick,” Jake hissed under his breath as he closed the door. He turned straight to me. “What did they want?”

  “What the police usually want after two murders. My confession and my guilt.”

  Sensing my attitude, Jake scowled at me as my dad put a hand on Jake’s shoulder. “I’ll err, just take a walk.”

  Jake nodded stiffly, keeping his gaze on me. “Henry will go with you, Jeff.”

  Henry, who had been guarding me during the interview, gave a nod and followed my father out.

  “You have something bothering you, Isla.”

  “Damn right I do!” I exploded. “How dare you make my friends feel uncomfortable in my house?”

  He quirked an eyebrow. “Your friends?”

  “Yes! Dr Lovejoy. You put stupid worries in my head for nothing about a man I’ve known for ten years then you send your muscle in to intimidate him. Why would you do that? He looked after my mother for ten years, Jake, and he did a damn fine job!”

  He stepped towards me but I held my ground, not allowing him to intimidate me any further. “I told you, Isla, your precious doc was unsuitable to care for your mother. You need to take my word for it. I wouldn’t just up her for some minor reason.” He was as angry as I was, his eyes spitting fire at me as I glared back at him.

  “Well, come on then, if it’s such a major issue then why won’t you tell me? I have all sorts racing through my head. I feared a friend I shouldn’t fear Jake! Have you any idea how that feels? And sending your bloody bodyguard in? Unbelievable!”

  “I don’t care what you think, Isla. You’re not permitted to see Dr Lovejoy.”

  My mouth fell open and I gawped at him, for a second wondering if I had heard him correctly. “I’m sorry, what?”

  His breathing was heavy and erratic as he struggled with his own temper. “I won’t repeat myself, Isla, but the last time you’ll be in close vicinity with the good doctor was an hour ago.”

  I stared at him, my mouth still wide open. “I’m sorry, I didn’t realise when you fucked me you attached a fucking leash!”

  His own eyes widened at my crude words and he took a step closer. “Why the hell do you never listen to me? I told you I’d take you to Seb’s that day but you had to jump ahead and nearly got yourself killed. I would have thought you’d have learned to trust me by now.”

  “How can I trust you when you give me nothing to understand you? I can’t read minds, Jake. I don’t like Genesis but I don’t forbid you to see her!” I countered, noticing the way his eyes narrowed and he stiffened when I mentioned his . . . whatever the fuck she was.

  He shook his head, spitting fire with his glare. “You have no need to worry about Gen, but you need to listen to me about your own friends!”

  “Go fuck yourself!” I spat and turned, snatching up my bag.

  His fingers gripped my arm and he spun me round. My heart stuttered at the sight before me. He wasn’t just angry, he was furious, his temples throbbing and his lips formed into a line. “I’m trying to protect you, Isla. I just. . . .” He raked his hands through his hair, dropping my arm and making my escape easy. “Fuck!” he spluttered as I made for the door. “He abused the women he hypnotised!” he blurted out.

  I froze, my stomach surging upwards as his revelation hit me full on. “What?” I wasn’t sure if I’d managed to speak or just thought the single word. My body was rigid and immobile, my feet steadfast to the carpet in case I keeled over.

  Feeling him move hesitantly behind me, I turned around to find him behind me, looking at me curiously. “I’m sorry,” he said quietly, “I didn’t want to tell you.”

  “Did he touch my mother?”

  He lowered his eyes but shook his head. “I don’t know, Isla.”

  “How do you know this?”

  “I looked into him. Adam found a few allegations had been made against him. There’s also . . . other stuff.”

  “Other stuff?” I murmured, my heartbeat speeding up as numerous horrors filled my head.

  Taking my hand, he led me over to the sofa and sat me down, perching gently beside me and stroking his thumb over my knuckles in a soothing gesture. “We also found out he’s a member of an exclusive club.” I shook my head, not following what he meant. “A sex club, Isla, but it’s not just the usual kind, it’s a kink one. A dark needs club.”

  Covering my hand with my mouth as I shook my head, I squeezed my eyes shut but snapped them back open when all I could picture was Dr Lovejoy and my mother. “Oh my God. My mum. I put her in there, Jake. As if I hadn’t ruined her life enough!”

  “Calm down,” he whispered as he grabbed my flailing hands. “This was a few years ago, there is nothing to say he . . . mistreated your mum.”

  “Mistreated?” I scoffed at the word. “Mistreated? I sent her in there because she watched me kill a man to stop her being raped! What a fucking contradiction!”

  “This is not your fault, sweetheart.” He was calm now, worried about my state of mind, wondering if I was going to fall over the edge and turn into what my mother had become.

  “Oh, I know!” I spat. “I’m going to kill him.”

  Jake smirked. “I like this part of you,” he breathed in my ear but I was too angry and horrified.

  “What the hell is wrong with the people of this world?”

  Jake looked down then shifted uncomfortably. “I’m one of those people, Isla,” he admitted quietly.

  I stared at him, weighting up his words. “Do you rape women?” My throat tightened as I waited for his answer, scared he would admit to it but he shook his head furiously.

  “No!”

  “Then don’t ever compare yourself to the evil bastards of this world!”

  “But I kill, Isla. Freely.”

  “Do you kill the innocent freely?”

  “You know I don’t, but I still murder and maim, Isla. There’s no excuses for what I do, and I never make any. I just want you to stop compartmentalising people into ‘good killers’ and ‘bad killers.’ We kill, we’re very much the same. You need to understand that.”

  I nodded slowly and swallowed. “Then I place myself in that circle too.”

  He frowned and shook his head but I placed a finger over his lips when he went to speak. “There are no good killers or bad killers, Jake. Just killers.” I repeated his words, trying to make him see.

  “Okay,” he conceded, unable to argue with his own beliefs. “I don’t want you to worry about it. I’m going to sort out the doc the way only I can.” I didn’t reply and he carried on, his hand softly framing my face. “I have some important business to attend to tonight that I can’t rearrange, but I’m picking you up at seven in the morning. Pack an overnight bag. You need some sun on those pale cheeks.”


  I didn’t argue, I didn’t have the energy. I needed a night away. Just Jake and me, and I promised myself that no matter how hard, I would put everything to one side of my mind until I returned and just concentrate on this broken man that obviously loved me a whole lot more than I loved myself.

  JAKE HELD HIS HAND out, helping me out of the helicopter as my wide eyes roamed every inch of land around us. After a private three hour flight and a thirty minute helicopter ride, I stepped onto an unspoilt expanse of secluded beaches, remote coves and the most striking generous-sized lodge I had ever seen slap bang in the middle of the vista that was currently taking my breath away.

  “Wow,” I whispered, unable to stop staring at the beauty surrounding me. “This is stunning.”

  Jake waved off our pilot then pulled me into a small copse of trees beside the open field we had landed in. He stared softly as he slowly backed me up until my back rested against a tall thin tree. He remained silent for a moment, his dark green eyes burning a hole into my soul.

  “I love you, Isla Cormack,” he murmured before he bent and kissed me, his emotions, his love and his adoration all pouring into me from his soft, sweet kiss. My heart seemed to explode in my chest, his idolisation making me feel like I was the only reason for him to breathe.

  Jake had been quiet since he’d picked me up that morning, his mind visibly elsewhere as he’d continually stared out of the helicopter window. I would be lying if I said I wasn’t worried, wondering if he’d changed his mind about our relationship after our little altercation the previous day, but now, the way his lips pressed hard against mine and his fingers twisted into my hair as if he was afraid I would vanish before him, my heart surged with relief.

  “Is everything okay?” I asked when he released me.