by Meg Jolie
“Come on,” Willow said. She looped her arm through mine. I kept my eyes on the ground as she swerved our way through the crowd. I wasn’t aware that Corey had followed us until we were outside. I realized Willow and I were not alone on the front porch. Ignoring Corey she turned to me. “So now what? What do you want to do?”
“I think I want to find Tristan,” I said. Somehow, on that short little hike from the hallway to the front porch, my feelings of hurt and disbelief had been boxed up. I was saving them for later. Right then, I was simply livid.
But I was willing to give him the benefit of the doubt. Maybe it hadn’t been Tristan. Not likely. Especially when Corey described a girl that looked just like Jayde. It sounded just too coincidental. But still…I needed proof. And really, it should be easy enough. If Tristan’s car was there, that was all the proof that I needed. Either he had lied to me, or he hadn’t.
“Should I go get Jamie?” Willow wondered.
I shook my head. “Probably not.”
Willow took out her phone. “I’ll let her know we’re leaving but that we should be back.”
I didn’t say anything. Jamie was with Evan so she probably wouldn’t even miss us. As I was waiting for her to finish up, my own phone announced an incoming text. My heart skittered when I saw that it was Tristan. I felt a huge surge of relief; sure he was messaging me to let me know there had been a change of plans. The feeling of relief was so immense, I almost collapsed from it.
But then I retrieved the text.
Running late
I texted back,Where are you?
There was a hesitation that felt a lot longer than I thought it should be. Especially when the text that came back to me was a single word:
Work
Corey had been looking over my shoulder. “Maybe he’s at work,” he said hesitantly. “Maybe he was just giving that chick a ride somewhere.”
“And she was too helpless to make it to the door on her own?” Willow grumbled.
“Let’s go,” I said. “There’s only one way to find out if Corey’s right.”
“I’ll drive,” Corey said.
We followed him to his car. The whole situation felt wrong on so many levels. Just being with Corey, felt wrong. Being with Corey so that he could prove to me that Tristan was a liar? It was almost unfathomable. And yet, as I dumped myself into his front seat I had to force myself to come to terms with the fact that it was exactly what I was doing.
We drove in silence. I was grateful for that. My emotions were so tangled up I was afraid of what would come out of my mouth if I tried to open it. The entire ride across town I was sure that Corey was wrong simply because I couldn’t fathom that he was right. I possibly could have if not for the text from Tristan. I could have excused it as thinking something came up. Maybe the group that I’d met at Pulse had shown up and he’d gotten off work early.
But that, right there, was the problem. He said he was at work. And if he wasn’t…?
Corey muttered an expletive from beside me. It took me a few seconds to realize why. But when I did, it was just another mental kick
It was Tristan’s car. No doubt about it. He rolled by slowly; to be sure I got a good look. I wasn’t sure if that was for my benefit. Or his, so that I’d know he was right. He continued a short distance down the block and then pulled over.
“Britta,” Corey said. His voice sounded pained. “I’m sorry. I didn’t want to be right.”
“I’m looking at it, and I still don’t believe it,” Willow said.
“Are you okay?” Corey asked.
“No. Not really,” I snapped. “It sucks to have your heart broken.”
“Yeah,” Corey said as he blew out a breath. “I can’t believe he did this to you.”
“I wasn’t just talking about him,” I grated out. “You suck, too!”
He gave me a startled look. Then his expression turned to one of guilt. “I’m sorry I hurt you, Britta. I really am. And to be honest, I’ve regretted it just about every single day since. It was one of the stupidest things I’ve ever done. And yeah, that’s saying a lot. But, at least I didn’t lie to you. At least I didn’t go behind your back. I sure as hell didn’t sneak off into some girl’s apartment to do who knows what. And then send you a text saying I was at work.”
My emotional dam chose that second to crack. My tears came out in a gush.
Corey didn’t say anything. Though I was sure I’d regret it later, I let him pull me into his chest. I silently cursed the fact that it felt so familiar. In my heartbroken state I was also cursing the fact that I’d ever let myself fall for Tristan. Corey was right. At least he’d been honest. He hadn’t snuck around. Or lied. Yeah, he’d broken my heart too. But at least he was up front about it.
I’d trusted Tristan.
Just like I’d trusted my dad.
And they’d both taken that trust and shredded it, along with my heart, into little tiny pieces.
I felt ridiculous, wrapped up in my ex’s arms, crying about my supposedly current boyfriend. Yet, I couldn’t seem to do the adult thing and pull myself away. Corey didn’t seem to mind too much. He started murmuring things I couldn’t quite understand. I thought maybe that wasn’t a bad thing. I probably didn’t want to know what he was saying right then.
“So, um, I realize you two are having a moment,” Willow said. “But I’m still back here.”
That announcement was enough to make me come to my senses. Somewhat. I pulled away from Corey. It took some effort because he didn’t seem to want to let me go.
“Ohhh,” Willow said. Her tone implied something was wrong. When she added, “Oh, no,” I snapped my head back to look at her.
She grimaced and pointed out the back window.
The mental kicks just continued to come. The evening had gone from bad, to worse, to now…almost unbearable. Because Tristan and Jayde were walking across the street behind us. Corey had been right. Tristan was grinning down at her and she had her arm looped through his. They did look…cozy.
“We should probably go,” Corey said. “You really shouldn’t have to watch this. The car was proof enough.”
He moved, going for the ignition but I put a hand on his arm to stop him. “No. Don’t. Not yet.” I was still staring out the back window. I was waiting, anticipating the second when I would feel my heart shatter. It didn’t come. Not then. At that moment, watching Tristan and Jayde, watching them when they looked so happy…I just felt… numb. I felt like it couldn’t really be happening. I felt like that couldn’t really be Tristan.
I should’ve realized that with the way my night was going, it was quite possible for things to continue to get worse. But I didn’t realize that until I saw Tristan open the passenger door. He was still smiling…and he looked so happy…as he closed the door and went around to the other side.
“They’re leaving together?” Willow asked. Her voice held every bit of the disbelief that I felt. “Where the hell would they be going?”
Corey grimaced when he looked at me. “Do you want me to follow them?”
I leaned forward, bracing my elbows on my knees so I could put my hands over my face. I wanted to block everything out for a second as I tried to think.
I felt Corey’s hand, rubbing soothing circles across my back. Part of me wanted to scream at him and another part of me wanted to thank him.
“I don’t want to follow them,” I decided. “But could you take me somewhere?”
“Yeah, of course,” Corey said. He was using a soft, sympathetic tone. In a way, it annoyed me. But mostly, it just made me want to cry. “I’ll take you anywhere,” he said.
“There’s something I want to look into,” I said. Right then, I wished that I hadn’t let Corey drive us. I wished Willow and I had followed. I can’t imagine anyone would want their ex along when they’re trying to dig up dirt on their... well, Tristan. I wasn’t comfortable calling him my boyfriend anymore.
“Can you take me to Harrison’s?” I asked.
Corey
agreed and we pulled up close to closing time.
I glanced at the clock. It was almost nine. The store would be closing in a matter of minutes.
Corey reached for his door handle, obviously planning on accompanying us.
“Can you just wait here? Please?” This whole evening was awkward enough. I didn’t need Corey to witness one hundred percent of my humiliation.
“Sure,” he said.
Willow got out with me and led the way. I’d never been in Harrison’s before. I’d never had a reason to. Tristan hadn’t wanted me there. It was pretty much what I expected it to be. It had sheet music in racks on one side and instruments on the other. The entire back end was filled with pianos. A guy I assumed was college-aged came up to greet us. He looked oddly prim and proper. He wore khaki pants, a navy blue tucked in polo and a nametag that read “Dominick”.
“Hi,” I said. “I’m looking for Tristan. Is he working tonight?”
“He helped us pick out some sheet music for a duet we’re singing,” Willow helpfully lied from beside me. “We had a few questions on it.”
“He’s not here—”
“He’s not?” Willow interrupted. She gave him her best pouty face. “I thought he said he was working tonight.” She turned her pout into a look of introspective confusion. “I was sure that’s what he said. Did we miss him?”
Dominick shook his head. “No. He didn’t work at all tonight.”
“Oh,” Willow said. Her pout was back in place. “Well, he works a lot right? Do you know when he’ll be in next? We’re singing in a wedding that’s coming up in a few weeks. So we’d really like to talk to him about the piece he recommended. The sooner the better.”
“It’s hard to say for sure when he’ll be in,” Dominick admitted. “Are you sure I can’t help you?” He looked disappointed.
“No,” I said as I tried to force a smile. “You can’t. It’s a piece Tristan picked out because he has some experience with it. So I’d feel better talking to him. I guess we should’ve come in earlier in the week.” I tried to look disappointed. I knew I couldn’t pull off a sexy pout like Willow. But I thought I could pull off looking pathetic. “Figures. He works all the time and we end up coming in the one night he has off.” I shook my head to show my disappointment.
“Pfftttt,” he said as he waved his hand at me. “Are you kidding? Ever since he met Jayde, he’s always asking me to cover his shifts. I don’t mind. I need the money. It’s been pretty nice. And I suppose since his parents are loaded, he can afford to skip out as much as he does.”
Every muscle in my body tensed at this admission. All those night he was claiming to work? Almost every night of the week? He was with Jayde? I knew I was about to cry. Or hyperventilate. Or be sick. Or all of the above. I sucked in a ragged breath as Willow’s arm lopped through mine.
“Wait, who’s Jayde?” Willow asked. She was the epitome of curious innocence.
He shook his head. “Ah, no one. I don’t know why I brought her up. It’s not really important. I just meant to say that he used to work a lot more than he does lately.”
“Okay, thanks Dominick,” she said somberly. “I think you’ve told us all we need to know.”
17
“Do you want me to bring you home?” Corey offered. We were sitting in front of Krista’s again. I really didn’t want to go back inside.
I ignored his question. “He’s not back yet,” I said as I scanned the cars.
It was dark at this end of town. There were no streetlights. A light snow had started to sprinkle down. But I’d searched the surrounding cars as we approached, under the beam of Corey’s headlights. No sign of Tristan.
I felt Corey’s hand squeeze my shoulder. “I’m really sorry, Britta. I had no idea it would all turn out like this. I honestly thought you two broke up. Or I never would’ve mentioned anything.”
“No,” I told him, “I’m glad you did. I mean, who knows how long this has been going on. And it probably would’ve just continued to happen and I never would’ve known.” I was quite for a minute. “I guess I’d rather know.” Actually, I knew I’d definitely want to know.
“So now what?” Corey asked.
I shrugged. “Now I guess I confront him.”
He was watching me warily. “You seem like you’re taking this surprisingly well.”
I didn’t want to tell him that I was just keeping it together because he was in the car. Who wants to cry in front of the guy that just broke your heart less than a few months ago? Not me. But also, “I don’t think it’s really sunk in yet.”
“Well,” Corey said, “I’m here for you, you know. If you need me.”
I managed to refrain from making a contemptuous comment. He was being incredibly nice, after all. And the last month or so, we’d been talking. And things had been friendly. And who doesn’t need friends? So instead, I managed to maintain the friendly status. “Thanks. And thanks for being so nice about this.”
He could’ve been making a big deal about the events of the evening but he wasn’t. He was being oddly supportive and I really appreciated it.
“I meant what I said before. I’ve regretted breaking up with you almost from the day I did it.”
I just nodded. I was suffering a fresh heartbreak. That was enough. I didn’t need to rehash an old one.
“You know, Britta—”
“Okay, right then,” Willow interrupted from the backseat. “It seems like you two really don’t need me here. So I think I’ll just go back inside.” She reached around the seat and squeezed my shoulder. “Call me or text me the second you need anything, okay?”
I nodded.
She darted out of the car and hurried down the snowy sidewalk. I wondered if I should’ve followed her. Apparently my thought process was moving in slow motion because I belatedly realized hanging out with Corey might not be the best idea.
“So,” Corey hesitantly began, “do you want me to bring you home?”
I glanced at the clock. We’d gone to Harrison’s and back. And he still wasn’t here yet. I was tempted to tell Corey that yes, I would like to go home. Let Tristan show up here and wonder where I’d gone.
The thought didn’t reach my mouth before Tristan pulled up.
“Or,” Corey pointed out, “maybe you want to stay.”
I didn’t answer. I simply slowly got out of Corey’s car almost at the same time Tristan got out of his. My feet crunched on the snow as I walked toward him. I could sense Corey was just a few steps behind me.
I could see Tristan’s expression in the headlight beams. They hadn’t died out yet. He didn’t look pleased. Funny, because I was pretty sure I wore a similar expression.
“What’s going on?” Tristan asked as soon as we were close enough to talk. I could tell by his tone that he wasn’t happy to see me with Corey. And it went beyond simply being surprised. But he was trying to keep his voice steady.
“How was work?” I asked. Corey came to a stop right beside me.
“It was…work.” His eyes darted to Corey and back to me. “Is there something I should know about?”
“Funny,” I said. “I was going to ask you the same thing.”
“Britta,” Corey said. He had managed to slip his arm around my waist as he leaned in to whisper in my ear. I instinctively wanted to pull away but he held me in place and said, “I’m just going to go wait by my car. I’ll be right over there if you need me.”
He let go and slowly backed away. I was relieved. I’d been afraid I’d have to beg him for some privacy.
Tristan watched him go. His jaw was clenched. His eyes held an expression somewhere between confusion and fury. As soon as Corey reached his car, a reasonable distance away, Tristan turned his attention back to me.
“Were you just using me? To make him jealous? Because that,” Tristan quietly said, “is even worse than being your rebound.”
“This has nothing to do with Corey. This has to do with you and me. And where you were tonight.”
/>
He had the nerve to look annoyed at me. His eyes flitted to Corey and his car. The car he’d seen me emerge from. “Where were you?”
“Are you kidding me? You’re going to turn this around on me?”
“What are you doing with Corey?” he demanded.
I shrugged. “Corey saw you tonight. With Jayde.”
Realization flooded Tristan’s face. He threw his hands up in frustration. “I bet he just couldn’t wait to run back to tell you that, could he?”
I was oddly relieved he didn’t deny it. Yet the fact that he didn’t deny it made it even more real. Ironic because seeing him with Jayde and talking with Dominick had already made it plenty real enough.
“Oh, now it’s Corey’s fault? First it’s my fault, now it’s his fault. No. I don’t think so,” I argued. I saw movement coming from the house and realized it was Willow. Tristan just looked at me, like he wasn’t sure what to say. “Have you been lying to me?” I knew he had. I just wanted him to admit it.
“Before you even think of adding more lies,” Willow said as she came up to my side, “you should probably know that we went into Harrison’s. We talked to Dominick. He said you only work a few hours a week there because you spend most evenings with Jayde. Dominick was more than happy to fill us in on your…extracurricular activities.”
He made a sound somewhat close to a growl. “He told you that?” he asked in disbelief. “He’s got a big mouth.” He stared at me a minute.
“Is that where you’ve been?” I demanded. “All these nights? Busy with your…” I hesitated, struggling with saying what I needed to say. “Were you busy with your ‘extracurricular activities’?” It came out sounding incredibly snide. It was better than letting my hurt show through because I was about to lose it.
“Britta,” Tristan said as he took a step toward me. I took a step back and Willow slid in between us.
“So how long has this been going on?”
He shrugged but was clearly agitated. “A while. She came in one night to look at some sheet music. We started talking and things just clicked.”
“So you just started hanging out,” I guessed. “And things went from there?”