by Amy Sparling
Me: Ugh, I’m sorry! Feel better!
I study myself in the mirror, feeling a little guilty at how relieved I am over April’s text. Not about her migraine—I feel horrible about that. She has this condition where she gets one about once a month, and it’s so bad she can’t function. She just takes these prescription migraine pills that make her feel sick and only reduce about half of the pain and she lays in her room all day with the windows covered to block out the sun.
That part makes me feel really bad for her, because it’s a terrible condition to have. But I’m also relieved because I didn’t know how to act around her today. I mean…I kissed Jonah.
How do you tell your best friend she was right and I totally like him after all the times I said I didn’t?
I’m totally not looking forward to hearing her jump around and sing the I Told You So song when she finds out. My phone beeps again.
Jonah: Good morning! Would you and April like a ride to school?
A boy who texts goodnight and good morning? What is this strange feeling I have? Oh, right. It’s called being treated with respect.
I’m grinning so hard my cheeks hurt as I type out a reply to his message.
Me: April is sick today, but I don’t want you to go out of your way. I can walk. :)
Jonah: It’s not out of my way. What time should I be there?
Me: Where do you live?
Jonah: Off 4th St….
Me: That’s totally far away!!
Jonah: So?
I bite the inside of my lip in a futile attempt to stop smiling. This boy is so sweet. I tell him he can come get me but only for today because I don’t want him going out of his way every day of the week. Plus, I’m not going to be the kind of friend who ditches her best friend when she starts dating a guy. I know April, and she wouldn’t want to be the third wheel in Jonah’s car every morning. Maybe just on the days when it rains. Besides that, we’ll keep walking to school.
I feel like walking into school with Jonah by my side will be this big event, like people will turn and watch us and we’ll be walking in slow motion down the hallways together with all eyes on us. Turns out we’re totally not even slightly popular, and no one cares. We don’t hold hands, but we walk closer than usual. I want to reach for his hand, but it’s all so new to me. Being around Jonah at the beach felt different, like we were new people outside of school. But now that I’m here with him in the familiar hallways of Sterling High, he almost feels like my annoying tutor again.
“Nat?” Jonah says just after the warning bell rings. He’s walked me to my first period class and we’re standing outside the door. “I don’t want to push anything you don’t want. Like…we don’t have to spend all day together or anything. I really like you.” He brushes my arm with his fingers as if he wants to reach for my hand but it’s too awkward and there’s no time. I grin up at him, unable to make my face stay normal for very long. Just seeing his cute expression while he figures out what to say makes me want to smile.
“I really like you too,” I say.
His cheeks redden. “If I do something you don’t like…just tell me, okay? I can slow down or give you space, or whatever.”
“Why are you so worried?” I ask, poking him in the stomach.
He shrugs. “I just want to do this right. I want to make you happy. Not rush into things…”
“I can practically see the list you’ve made in your head,” I tell him. “Dating is not like tutoring, Jonah. You can’t just write up a study plan and check off each step.” I give him a reassuring smile. Somehow, seeing how nervous he is makes me more confident. “We’re going to be fine.”
***
Jonah and I find each other at the start of lunch. I’d told him I wouldn’t have anyone to sit with today since April is gone and he happily offered to sit with me. I don’t know how this is going to work with our separate lunch tables, or what will happen when April comes back, but I’m looking forward to having this day alone with him.
We take our food out to the courtyard, which is a little uglier now that the school fenced in the portion around the cafeteria doors. Too many kids were caught walking off campus during their lunch break and not returning. Now we’re allowed to eat outside, but only in the designated fenced in parts.
Jonah and I choose a bench near the fence and I notice Natasha O’Hurn lift an eyebrow as we walk past her and her band friends. She doesn’t stop looking at us, even when we sit down and start eating our lunch. She probably doesn’t even realize I’m watching her watch us, because she’s looking at Jonah with an obvious hint of jealousy in her gaze.
“So your mom’s store is pretty cool,” Jonah says. He grabs a Cheeto and crunches it. “I think my mom goes in there sometimes. It has all that girly stuff she likes.”
“Well, tell her to go there more often,” I say with a snort. “And tell her to bring about five hundred rich friends to buy stuff so we don’t go out of business.”
“Are sales still bad?” he asks.
I nod and take a bite of my PB&J. “Selling books is helping, but not really. The bottom line still says we’re screwed.”
Jonah seems concerned, like he actually cares, when he asks some more questions. I get the feeling that talking sales and numbers appeals to his nerdy side, and that he’s not just asking me stuff to be polite, so I tell him all about the store. About how my mom married my ex step-dad and the store was their dream. I even tell him about Mrs. Reese the AP, and how she showed me my paper from freshman year when I wanted to open a coffee shop next door. Jonah thinks a coffee shop is a great idea since oddly, there aren’t any on the boardwalk already. Gigi’s Cupcakes sells coffee, but not many people know that, plus her store is so small it doesn’t have that sit around and enjoy your coffee vibe. My coffee shop would have that vibe.
By the time the bell rings, it only feels like we’ve been talking for a few minutes, not forty. I’ve never wanted to skip class more than I do now, so I could just stay out here with Jonah and talk all day. But now more than ever, I need to go to class. I want passing grades so that I can graduate, and so Jonah’s perfect tutoring record can remain intact.
We pick up our trash and start heading toward the cafeteria door. Natasha and her friend are still watching us, her eyes narrowed in jealousy. I can’t help but grin as I lace my arm through Jonah’s and lay my head on his shoulder as we walk.
A couple of months ago, I wouldn’t have cared one bit who Jonah Garza was dating. He was a nerd, who hung with nerds, and I didn’t want anything to do with that.
Now I see the error in my thinking. Jonah is so much more than a super-smart band-geek friend who never cuts class or gets into trouble.
He’s kind, and hot, and a great kisser. He’s patient, and clever, and he puts up with my shit. I feel like the luckiest girl in Sterling High.
My phone buzzes just after Jonah drops me off at my history class. My heart jumps with excitement as I slide out my phone and secretly check the screen under my desk. If it’s Jonah telling me he misses me already, I might melt into goo from all the sweetness.
My heart gets stuck in my throat as I look at the text. It’s not from Jonah.
Caleb: Hey boo, sry I was busy last nite. Wanna go out Friday?
Chapter 23
This day is going too well to let Caleb screw it up. I ignore his text. I even toss my phone in my backpack for the rest of the school day so I’m not tempted to check it. When the final bell rings, I sneak a look at it on my way to the library for tutoring. Caleb sent one more text, which was just a question mark. I smirk, satisfied that he’s waiting around on me for once, and turn the phone off.
Even though we are technically dating now, Jonah is in full tutoring mode when I enter the library. He already has my chemistry notes open with the history textbook stacked underneath that.
“What kind of grades do you have?” I ask curiously as I take my seat next to him. “I’m guessing you make all A’s.”
“I have a o
ne hundred average,” he says, glancing down at the chemistry notes. “Want to study vocab first?”
“A one hundred in what?” I ask. “Which class?”
“All of them.” I would think he’s joking, but he looks right at me with all the seriousness he usually has.
“Wow,” I say, exhaling. “Now I’m even more intimidated by you.”
He snorts and shakes his head. “Nah, chica. Nothing to worry about. I’m the one intimidated by you.”
I forget all about Caleb’s stupid text while I study with Jonah. It feels a little weird to be so completely over the guy, since I crushed on him forever, but there’s something about ditching a girl on her birthday that makes you severely unattractive. Plus, the more time I spend with Jonah, the more I realize how great it is to be with a guy who actually cares about you.
Jonah insists on driving me home after tutoring, but I tell him he can only do this on tutoring days because I can’t leave April to walk home alone. He offers to bring her, but I tell him that’s a little too fast. April needs to warm up to someone first. Plus, I like my walks home with her. It’s our time to chat, relax, and enjoy the outside air. I wonder how much my life will change now that Jonah and I are a thing.
Since April’s not here, and since I’m already getting a ride, I have Jonah drop me off at The Magpie so I don’t have to ride my bike there. He kisses me in the parking lot, then grins at me as I reluctantly step out of his car. If it were up to me, we’d hang out all day, but I know the best way to have a good relationship is to give it some space. I can’t make him tired of me this soon.
Mom is engrossed in a book when I walk in the store. She’s sitting in one of the arm chairs in the break room, the hardback book just inches from her face.
“Hellooo,” I say in a singsong as I tap on the doorframe.
She jumps. “When did you get here?”
I laugh. “Just now. Are you reading the merchandise?”
“No,” she says, slamming the book closed. “Why? Is that unethical? If I read it but don’t bend the pages and I never take it out of the store, is it still brand new?”
“You’re going to have to figure that out on your own,” I say, laughing as I go to the front desk and let her keep taking a break. I also take out my phone for the first time since lunch, because although I forget about Caleb when Jonah is around, now that he’s gone, I’m wondering if Caleb has sent anything else.
And boy has he.
Caleb: ????
Caleb: Did you get my text?
Caleb: Hello?
Caleb: this Friday… me and you.
Caleb: we’ll stay out late and I’ll show you a good time
Caleb: I’ll take your silence as a yes
My lip curls as I read his messages. What a disgusting pig.
Me: No need to blow up my phone. I had it turned off.
Caleb: there she is! You better wear something sexy on Friday
Funny how he can reply quickly today but was MIA on my birthday.
Me: No thanks. I have plans on Friday
Caleb: Saturday then
Me: how about never? Does that work for you?
Caleb: never does not work. What’s your problem? Lets go out!
Me: I said no. deal with it
Caleb: damn, girl. I like it when you play rough
I grip my phone and take a deep breath, telling myself not to give into my rage and throw it across the room. I can’t afford a new phone and Caleb isn’t worth it. I hate how cocky he is, how he thinks can just snap his fingers and I’ll be thrilled to go out with him.
A few minutes go by and then he calls me. I ignore the call. When a customer comes in, it takes everything I have to put on a polite smile and be friendly even though all I want to do is go outside and take a deep breath and scream.
I’m checking out the customer’s purchase—two metal bookmarks with charms on them—when the door opens again and Caleb’s stupid face grins at me. He doesn’t seem affected at all that I basically told him to screw off in my last text.
Anger boils up inside me and for the first time ever, I wish I didn’t work in The Magpie, so that he wouldn’t be able to find me.
“Hey,” he says in this pathetic seductive voice while he leans over the front counter. His body spray wafts through the room, assaulting my poor nose.
“Are you here to buy something?”
He glances around the store then looks back at me. “I’m here to talk to you.”
I fold my arms over my chest, grateful that Mom is still in the back room and therefore out of earshot. “I have nothing to say to you.”
“Why are you being so mean?” he says, crunching his eyebrows together as if he’s really offended. Ha.
“You know what’s mean?” I say, keeping my voice steady. “Standing up a girl on her birthday.”
“Huh?” he says, before quickly bursting into a smile. “Oh that’s nothing, Natalie. Wednesdays are stupid! We need to hang out this weekend so we can spend some quality time together.”
“I’d rather eat my own socks.”
He chuckles. “Look. Okay. You’re mad.” He rolls his eyes as if the idea of me being mad is just so unbelievably stupid. Maybe it is. Maybe if Jonah hadn’t been there on the beach when I was having a horrible day…maybe I’d still be the pathetic girl who does whatever it takes for some attention from a cute boy.
“Let’s talk, Natalie. I swear I’ll make it up to you.”
He gives me this sad little puppy face and it just makes me want to punch him. Mom appears from the back room, smiling when she sees I’m not alone.
“Hi there,” she says. “Welcome to The Magpie.”
“Thanks,” Caleb tells her. “Me and Natalie were just talking.”
“No we weren’t,” I say.
Mom lifts an eyebrow, but I’m not about to bring her into my drama. “I was just telling him I’m busy at work.”
“Give me a couple of minutes and I’ll take over,” Mom says, flashing me a smile as if she’s doing me a favor. “Then you can go talk outside. Maybe get some ice cream?”
“Perfect!” Caleb says. He grins at me as if he’s forgotten that I’m mad at him. “I’ll see you outside.” Then he bounces off with a pep in his step and I just want to punch something. How can he be such an ass?
But now I have to talk to him. I know without a doubt that he’ll just come back in here and embarrass me in front of Mom if I don’t. So when she’s ready to take over for me, I slip outside, balling my fists at my sides.
I can’t tell who’s yelling at first. As I walk the boardwalk toward the ice cream shop, I hear low voices talking in angry tones coming from somewhere up ahead. Then I see the door to the game store, well, what used to be the game store, is open and the yelling is coming from outside.
I hear the name Caleb and stop. The angriest voice is Jack Brown’s.
“I don’t know,” Caleb is saying. “She’s pissed at me.”
I lean closer, standing just outside the game store near the open door. Jack Brown says, “You were supposed to be charming, son. How the hell did she get mad at you?”
“I don’t know! Girls are crazy.”
“Go back there and win her over,” Jack growls. “Take her out way too late and make her miss work on Saturday when Marlene needs her there. The more you do it, the more she’ll want to give up the store.”
“That might take a while,” Caleb says, sounding more resigned than angry now. “I’m not going to pretend to date this chick, dad. I have a life.”
“You’ll do what it takes so we can secure the property.”
I’ve heard enough. I’m now so pissed I might be able to shatter glass with my stare alone. I step into the doorway and reveal myself to the two assholes inside the empty game store.
“Sorry to barge into the party here, but Caleb, I won’t be going out with you. Not now, not ever. Lose my number and stop texting me obsessively, you freaking stalker.”
His eyes go wide a
nd Jack’s face hardens, the lines in his jaw tightening. I don’t care. I’m too pissed to care. It’s one thing to use me, but no one messes with my mom’s store or her happiness.
I level my glare at Caleb’s dad. “And you, Mr. Brown, can go fuck off. You’ll never get my mom’s store. I don’t care if you buy every fucking store in this town, you won’t get hers.”
I’m out the door before he can say anything. And they must know what’s good for them, because neither one of them chase after me.
Chapter 24
I’m so seething mad I can’t go back to the store just yet. Mom will see right through me and she’ll obviously think I’m mad about the stupid boy who came to see me. Which I am, but not in the way she thinks. I also don’t want to run into Caleb or his stupid dad, so I slip behind the boardwalk to the access hallway where only the janitors and store owners have access. I take some deep breaths and walk back and forth a few times until I feel some of my anger fade away. I’m still pissed, more pissed than I’ve ever been, but I’m okay now. I am more determined than ever to work at The Magpie now.
I will make it successful and I will open my coffee shop when I’m older.
Back in the store, Mom is sneakily reading that book while standing at the front counter. I roll my eyes at her and begin restocking some greeting cards from the new batch we just had delivered.
“Natalie,” Mom says softly. She puts the book on the counter and gives me the exact same look she gave me the day my cat died while I was at school.
“What’s wrong?” I say. My hands are now shaking and I shove them in my back pockets. “I want to talk about something.” She pats the stool behind the register. “Come over here.”
“Is this about Caleb?” I say as I walk over. “Because I can’t stand that guy. He won’t be coming back here. I made it very clear I’m not interested in him.”