Silent Heart
Page 21
‘Yes!’ He took off his signet ring, his mark of rank, and tried putting it on my finger, but they were just too little, even the thumb. Laughing he pulled a long golden cord off of his uniform and strung the ring so it could hang around my neck. I kissed him and pulled him down to me. We started to make love again but he stopped and looked at the door.
‘Someone is knocking. Stay here. I’ll get it.’ He pulled on his pants and opened the door just enough to stick his head out. He closed it and turned back to me with a grin. ‘Your maid says she has to get you dressed. She was quite disapproving of me. I think she knows what we’ve been up to.’
‘Oh no,’ I smiled and covered my face.
‘It’s alright I’m going to make an honest woman of you,’ he grinned and started getting dressed. ‘I’ll wait for you outside.’
‘Wait. I have to ask you something.’
‘What?’
‘Since we’re going to be married and all I think it’s time you told me.’
‘Why am I worried?’
‘What did I say while on willow bark all that time ago?!’ I asked with exaggerated movements. He threw back his head and laughed.
‘You really want to know?’
‘Yes!’
‘You told me you loved me.’ I stared at him my jaw hanging down.
‘You knew? All this time?’
‘You were drunk on willow bark and didn’t mean to say it. It was the truth but you weren’t ready to say it. I wanted to wait until you could say it in your right mind. You were so fragile and hurt and I was afraid to push it. You had just worked up the courage to hug me again.’
‘Oh.’
‘Oh,’ he laughed and kissed me. ‘I better get out of here. Your maid is knocking again. Love, as beautiful as you are to look at, I would cover up before she comes in.’ I scrambled under a sheet and he opened the door bowing to my frowning maid. ‘I’ll be outside,’ he grinned.
The maid looked at me with her hands on her hips, a stunning white dress hanging over one arm and pointed sternly to my clothes all over the floor. I couldn’t help it. I laughed. I showed her Stone’s ring hanging around my neck and pointed to my wedding ring finger. Her whole face lit up with surprise and she hugged me fiercely.
My gown was stunning and little white flowers that practically glowed were put in my hair. I danced the night away with my love. For once I didn’t wonder if everyone knew I had been raped but wondered with blushing smiles if everyone knew I had just made love to the famous Sir Richard. We announced our intentions to Evard that night, planning the wedding for as soon as he returned. This, of course, was gossip for the whole court before the night was through and I couldn’t make a step without someone I’d never met coming to congratulate me.
Stone stayed in my room that night. We made love until the sun came up and it was time for him to leave, not caring how tired he would be. We needed these last minutes of closeness before he had to leave my side. We stayed joined as long as we could, trying to soak up enough touches to last us in the coming months.
I watched from the courtyard as he and his men packed their horses. Mindful of Basil’s possible condition he took a different horse. Other wives were there as well doing the same things I was. ‘Come back to me,’ I said after our last kiss.
‘Even if I have to crawl back with a broken arm and three bloody stumps. You are my whole world, Paige. I’ll always come for you. Never give up hope. Even in death I will come for you.’
‘I love you.’
‘I love you forever.’
I watched him ride away from me and prayed I would see him soon. My dearest love.
Epilogue
I sat at my desk in my new larger room with periwinkle flowers painted all over the walls putting the last touches on the last painting in my book. Evard was so enamored by my story that he commissioned a picture book of sorts to tell the tale. He was clear he wanted every detail, no matter how gruesome or dark.
It started with the forest I had grown up in and went directly to that day I found Rinald and watched his last breath. I painted Stone and all our adventures, though I kept our blossoming romance to a minimum. I didn’t want to scandalize the entire court, though I’m sure most of them could guess with our quick engagement. Of my time in captivity, the scenes were mostly black with an odd flash of blood or a shadowed face here and there. I implied what had happened to me but left most of it to the imagination. The men of course guessed, as did the women who had lived through such things. The rest only imagined they understood. I took a chance on the last page and painted me in Stone’s arms with his hand resting on my swollen belly.
That was the one thing that had changed while I waited for him to come home. That last night as we lay desperately together, we conceived a child. Five months later, it was growing and moving and waiting just as anxiously to be born and meet its father as I was waiting for its father to come home.
When it became clear I was pregnant, there was much scandal and gossip at court even though they all knew Stone’s intentions. Evard and Sarah, his queen, sat me down with Betsy to haltingly translate; asking me if the child was definitely Stone’s or if there was some question. I laughed and swore and affirmed that the child could only be Stone’s. They asked again and again until I explained rather bluntly that two weeks after the men had taken me, I had my woman’s cycle and Stone was the only other man I had ever been with. They finally called off and decided I needed someplace bigger to live.
Arnold came bursting through my door two hours early for our lesson. He was quite skilled with his hands and had a penchant for carving so I had him working on brushes with me as well as language. He was my constant companion these days, seeing it as his personal responsibility to protect me while Stone was gone. He’d had the honor of being the first one to feel the baby move the month before. Since then all of court has had their hands on my belly.
‘You’re early,’ I said.
‘My Lady, they’ve been seen!’ he gasped for breath.
‘Who?’
‘Sir Richard and the others. They’ll be up to the grand courtyard in a few minutes.’
‘You’re just telling me now?’ I asked getting up
‘We didn’t want to upset you with a wait.’
‘And surprising me is better?’
‘Sorry, my Lady.’
‘No lesson today. Go on, you have duties when he gets in. Remember not a word!’
‘Yes, ma’am,’ and he ran off as quickly as he came. Betsy was gone on some errand so I patted my dress making sure the baby bump was well hidden and hurried down the stairs. Several courtiers saw me running and decided I needed an escort so I wouldn’t fall. I just barely managed to send them away by the time I got to the front doors.
I stepped onto the paved road just as the men were riding up. Seeing me, Stone lurched into a gallop and rode right up to my feet. He was clean and shaven making me think he spent the night with his parents. I wondered if my secret was already out. He dismounted as Arnold ran up; taking the reins of his horse, paying no mind to anything around us, and picked me up. I clung to him kissing every part of his face making him laugh.
‘I’m home,’ he said.
‘Did you find them?’
‘Every last one of them. It is completely over.’
‘Oh Thank God. Come, I have so much to tell you.’
‘In a few minutes. I really should report to Evard.’
‘Later. Don’t worry I have his permission to steal you for awhile.’ He looked at me surprised.
‘Okay.’ I took his hand and dragged him to the gardens. ‘So what have you been doing?’ he asked pulling me to a bench.
‘Painting and teaching mostly.’
‘Did Evard give you an official position?’
‘He did—.’
‘Good. I was worried about you fitting in while I was gone.’
‘I’m fine. Stirring up all kinds of scandal—.’
‘How is Basil?’
‘A foal! God what am I going to do with a foal?’
‘I have an idea on who you could give it to—.’
‘Give it away! This is Basil’s first foal, you really think I would give it away?’
‘I think you’ll approve of this one—.’
‘Oh, I have something for you.’
‘Stone! Fold your hands!’
‘After I give you this,’ he grinned pulling out a little wooden box and handed it to me. I stilled realizing I wasn’t going to get a word in until I let him do this. I opened the box and found a small silver ring set with a sapphire exactly the shade of my eyes.
‘It’s beautiful,’ I said putting my hand on his face.
‘Now you have a real ring and I can have mine back. I needed it a few times out there.’ He made a show of taking it out and putting it on my finger. ‘Now, what was so important you had to drag me away from my duties?’ he grinned.
‘How was your visit with your parents?’ I asked narrowing my eyes.
‘Pleasant as usual. Mom sends her love. It seems the two of you have bonded.’ I had to laugh. ‘But I don’t think you brought me out here to ask about that.’
‘How do you feel about children?’ He thought about this for a moment and nodded his head.
‘As soon as we’re married we can have as many as you like. Making them is fun,’ he leaned over and kissed my neck. ‘I can’t wait to get started.’
‘No, Stone,’ I laughed and stood up. I put his hand on belly. ‘We have a baby.’ He stared at me with this odd mix of rapt love and total shock.
‘Are—are you sure?’
‘Oh yes, I’m sure.’ I moved his hand to where the baby was kicking in protest to my position change. He startled and slowly went down on his knee, both hands exploring every inch of the baby bump. ‘Are you okay?’ I asked him.
‘Love, if you only knew. Every night I was out there I dreamed of this; of a life with you, children. And now you’ve given me everything I could ever hope for. Are you alright?’
‘I’m fine. Everyone takes good care of me.’
‘No, I mean is it safe? Are you healthy enough?’ he stood up and put his hands on my shoulders.
‘What are you talking about?’
‘Bear told me you shouldn’t have children.’
‘What? When was this?’
‘All that time ago when we were fighting in your cabin. He was worried about you alone with me and spouting off about you can’t marry anyone because you can’t have children. He said it wasn’t safe, your body was too weak.’ I sighed exasperated.
‘Yes I have to be careful but honestly I have a whole team of mid-wives. I can’t even walk down the stairs without some passing servant or courtier taking my arm. They feed me five times a day at least. Evard even told your mother. She visits at least once a month. Betsy checks the ingredients on my paints for God’s sake! I am perfectly fine and your child does nothing but kick me.’ I watched him struggle to hide a smile.
‘I love you,’ he said.
‘What is so funny?’
‘You’re just so exasperated with everything,’ he laughed. ‘I promise never to worry about you again.’
‘Stone!’
‘Is it wrong that this makes me want to make love to you even more?’
‘Maybe we can discuss that in bed.’ He grinned. ‘I can’t wait to show you our new quarters.’
‘New quarters?’
‘Evard decided we needed someplace bigger. It has three bedrooms.’
‘Three? Why do we need three? Wait a minute how many are in there?’ He looked suddenly scared.
‘Only one,’ I laughed. ‘One room is for Betsy so she can tell me when the baby is crying.’
‘Oh.’
‘Come here and let me welcome you home properly.’
‘I like the way you think.’
He followed me to our room and we collapsed into bed, skipping dinner and ignoring everyone else until the next day. We had a small wedding at his parent’s house two weeks later.
Ten days after mid-winter night I gave birth to a daughter. We named her Elaine after my mother. Elaine Elizabeth Stonewell. I called her Little Bird.