Dark Desire (Dark Saints MC Book 5)

by Jayne Blue

  “You’re incredible,” I said. “I’ve only known a few truly strong women in my life. I think you’re one of them.”

  Ariel turned in my arms. Her luminous green eyes searched my face. I loved every detail about hers. She had pale skin, kissed by the sun at the bridge of her nose and cheeks. It brought out her freckles.

  “Was your mother one of them?” She sucked in a breath after she asked the question, as if she knew the pain it might cause me to answer.

  I stepped back, letting Ariel go. I ran a hand over my jaw. Most of the time, when people asked me about my mother, I didn’t answer. After a while, people stopped asking. Even Bear.

  “No,” I finally said. I went to the couch along the wall and sat down, running one thumb over the opposite palm. Ariel stayed at the window.

  “She wasn’t strong?”

  I shook my head. “Nope. Not strong enough. My mother had a bad habit of relying on the wrong guys to take care of her. My father being the worst.”

  “You lost them so close together,” she said. My heart jumped and that familiar wall started to go up. How the fuck did she know that?

  “I-I’m sorry,” Ariel said. She came toward me, taking careful steps. “I, uh ... I did some research on the house. You know, before I bought it. And you said you’d lived there. It wasn’t hard to put two and two together.”

  I felt raw, exposed. My back stiffened and an old anger rose within me. Ariel was bold though. She came to me, putting a light hand over mine as she took a seat next to me.

  Who was this woman? If anyone else had asked me these questions or said what she’d said, hell, if it were a guy, I might have decked him. She was different though. Still, old habits die hard and the walls went up.

  “My mother was a whore,” I said. Ariel blanched, but she didn’t pull away. Give it time, I thought. Straightening in my seat, I looked at her. My unflinching stare became a dare. How far could I go before Ariel pulled away?

  “She stripped for the club,” I said. “We owned The Dude Ranch when it was downtown.”

  “Right,” Ariel said. “Down by the docks. Cups is there now.”

  “She hooked up with my old man. He was a real loser. All he did was make her promises he never kept. That house was one. It was a mess when they bought it. Year after year he told her he was gonna fix it up himself. He’d start projects he didn’t finish. Rip holes in the wall or the floor where he was going to fix the electrical or build her a hot tub and he’d leave it like that. Wrecked. Exposed. Unfinished. Whatever. He just made more of a mess. Everything he touched turned to shit. He got her hooked on drugs, then he turned her out. Real pedigree, I come from.”

  Ariel’s smile was kind, not judgmental. Still, I bristled. And still, she didn’t pull her hand away from my knee.

  “Enough,” I said. “This is what the north side is.”

  “I don’t believe that,” she said. “You and I both know better.”

  “What do you know?” I asked. “You lost your mama cuz she got sick. I’m not saying that’s any easier, but it’s different.”

  “You’re right.” Ariel finally pulled away, but she didn’t break my gaze. “It’s not easier. And my father was wonderful. He stayed. He taught me a skill. He gave me my passion and the means to follow it. He made me who I am.”

  “Yeah. My daddy made me who I am too.”

  “And who is that?”

  Fuck. I came here tonight for ... something else. I wanted Ariel. Badly. But I knew from the start she was more than what I was used to. Now that she was showing me exactly how much, an old anger rose like barbed wire around my heart.

  “I’m exactly what you think I am.” The words came out with a dark tone. Ariel flinched. Color came back into her cheeks.

  “You don’t know what I think.”

  “Yeah? Why’d you let me take you home last night? Why’d you let me in? What were you looking for?”

  She narrowed her eyes, defiant. “And exactly what are you looking for now, Chase? What does that even mean ... Chase. What are you chasing?”

  “Tail,” I blurted out. I was an asshole. But I couldn’t stop myself.

  Ariel laughed at me. “I don’t think so. You going to sit there and tell me I was the best you ever had? You just had to come back for more?”

  She cut right through me. Dammit. Who was this girl? “You think I’m some fixer-upper?” I challenged her right back. “Can’t be done, baby. I’m not lookin’ to change.”

  Ariel got even bolder. Something smoldered between us and it was more than just lust. She reached for me, putting a hand on my cheek. “You might not be looking to change, but you’re looking for a change.”

  I brought a hand up and circled it around her wrist. There was a moment. A beat. I saw the hunger in her eyes. If I were a mind reader, I just knew I’d find the scene from last night in the hallway playing out again for her. She’d taunted me. It had been a throwaway comment. Was she the best I’d ever had? Fuck. Maybe.

  I moved first. I pulled Ariel to me. She sank into the kiss; a little groan escaped from her mouth. I wanted her more than any other woman. That was true. At the same time, I knew she’d make me give more than any other woman. In that brief moment, I had no idea if I was worthy.

  I let her go. Her eyes searched mine, still lit with fire. “Chase,” she gasped.

  I ran a thumb over her cheekbone. She was so soft, so warm. She’d be mine for the taking. “You’re right,” I said. “It’s been a long day.”

  I can’t believe I did it, but I found the strength to stand up and let her go. She’d asked me what I wanted from her. The answer became a drumbeat straight through my heart.

  Everything.

  Chapter 12

  Ariel

  It would have been easier if Chase had stayed. We both knew what would have happened. I wanted him. He wanted me. Sex was simple. Except now, it was anything but. As I stood over the blueprints for the Hutchins Street project, Chase’s face seemed to swim in front of me.

  “Ariel, you hearing me?” Ed tapped a finger in the center of the prints.

  Blinking hard, I smiled and looked up at him. “Yeah. Load bearing beam. From here to here. I told you, make it work.” I ran my hand from the kitchen into the main living area on the plans.

  “You going for something rustic? Or are you going to paint it?”

  Smiling, I pushed myself off the table. “Not rustic. If that house were out in the country somewhere, sure. But those houses were built by people who were looking for something modern for the times. I want to honor that somehow.”

  Fresh starts. That’s what the north side of Port Azrael was filled with half a century ago. Since then, it had become the boulevard of broken dreams. But I would change all of that.

  “Mid-century modern,” I said. “That’s what I’m going with.”

  “Hmm,” Ed snorted. “Sounds like a fancy word for old-fashioned.”

  “Not the way I’m going to do it. I sense doubt in your tone. Haven’t you learned by now that I’m always right about these things?”

  “You’re more and more like your old man every day. Except you’re softer than he was. That’s the kind of thing that’s going to cause trouble. You coddle that crew.”

  We’d had this argument a million times before. Ed thought I was too far into everyone’s business. They looked at me more like a big sister than a boss. He was right to a point. But I also knew I’d earned loyalty out of every member of my crew.

  “I coddle no one,” I said. “Not even you.”

  “How’d it go at Digby’s the other night?” Ed cut right to it and I squinted my eyes, bracing for the lecture I knew was coming. Of course he’d heard that I left with Chase. My crew was loyal, but they were also a bunch of gossips.

  “It went fine,” I said, looking through my office window. Nolan did a bad job of turning his attention away from me as if he hadn’t been listening in the whole time. Nolan had probably been the one to clue Ed in on my social life.r />
  “Uh huh.” Ed went over, shut the door and pulled the window blinds. Oh yeah, Nolan had been the one to spill the beans, for sure.

  “Don’t,” I said, putting my hands up. I let my next comment die on my lips. Ed was my father’s friend, but he wasn’t my father. And I wasn’t a kid.

  “You can’t tell me that, Ariel. You can ignore my advice, that’s your right. But I made a promise to your dad a long time ago. On the day you were born, actually.”

  I plopped in my desk chair and put my feet up. I motioned with my hands for Ed to get on with it. He came to the desk and leaned forward, resting his weight on his fists. “Don’t blow me off, honey. I’ve done a lot more livin’ than you have in this town. I’ve seen a thing or two. I just want you to be careful.”

  “And when have you ever known me not to be?”

  Ed straightened. “Well, never, I guess. But just tell me straight out. Is there something going on between you and that kid from the Dark Saints?”

  Kid. It was an odd way to describe Chase. I doubted he’d truly been a kid since the day his mother died some twenty years ago. My instinct was to dismiss Ed and tell him no. Of course not. But I could never lie to him straight out.

  “I don’t know.” It was the most honest answer I could give him.

  “What’s his name?”

  This got an eye roll from me. “Ed, please. Stand down.”

  “Nothing doing. Just tell me his name.”

  “Fine. Chase Cutter. He used to live in the house on Hutchins Street.”

  Ed started to pace. He ran a hand over his mouth. Twice, he paused and pointed a finger at me. Twice, he swallowed whatever he meant to say. Finally, he took a chair on the other side of the desk and leaned back hard.

  “Cutter. His old man was a fuck-up. Did you know that?”

  “I did, actually. Chase told me.”

  “You know how your dad felt about those bikers. You know what they are. What they do. Dammit, Ariel. He try shaking you down? No wonder this asshole was so interested in what we’re doing on the north side.”

  “It’s not like that, Ed. Believe me, I thought that too. I told him as much. But Chase isn’t looking to get in our way.”

  Ed studied me; his brown eyes twitched as he chewed the inside of his cheek. His concern touched me at the same time it infuriated me.

  “You’re smart. You’re tough. You’ve had to be and that’s the part that breaks my heart. But if I don’t tell you to watch out for landmines, who will?”

  I reached across the desk and took Ed’s hand. “I do watch out for landmines. And it means a lot to me that you care. And also that you trust me. So the truth. This guy, Chase. He’s got me interested. I don’t know for sure if I’m going to see him again, but I think I might like to. But I also know where to step, you know?”

  Ed grumbled. I couldn’t hold back a laugh. He sounded just like a grizzly bear. A big, overprotective grizzly bear. I stepped around the desk and hugged him.

  “I love you, you old fart. You know that?”

  Ed hugged me back but rolled his eyes. “You’re gonna be the death of me. I hate this shit and you know it.”

  I did know it. Ed was a confirmed bachelor and the crustiest guy I knew. I loved him for all of it.

  “All right!” he said, pulling away and smacking his palms on the armrest before he stood. “I’ve done my part. I’m not happy about it. But I do trust you, kiddo. Just know your old man’s spinning in his grave right about now.”

  I reached up and roughed up the few remaining wisps of Ed’s gray hair. He growled again and pulled away.

  My phone vibrated on top of my desk two feet away from him. Ed’s scowl came back when he saw the caller ID before I could grab it. It was the number from Bullock’s Body Shop. Though it made my heart trip, Ed had been around long enough to know exactly who it was too. He rose and thumped his fingers on the desktop.

  “Ed,” I started.

  He put a hand up to silence me. “I said my piece. I also said I trusted you.” With that, he turned and walked out.

  I picked up the phone. “Hey,” I answered.

  “Hey, yourself. Is this a bad time?”

  Through the window in my office door, I could see straight to the lobby. Ed stopped to say something to Nolan. The pair of them turned and gave me grim looks. I walked to the door and shut it. They could still see me, but I’d be damned if I’d let Nolan eavesdrop. It wouldn’t matter though. Ed had already clued him in.

  “No,” I said, turning my back to the lobby. I took a seat in my office chair and turned it to face the exterior window. I had a view of the flat prairie abutting the highway. Someday, I wanted to buy up that property. It was zoned commercial. “I mean, it’s a fine time. I was just going over some of the plans for your old house.”

  I heard a sharp intake of air on the other end of the phone. “Not my house anymore. Not for a long time. Anyway, I want to see you again.”

  That familiar heat speared through me. The truth was, I wanted to see Chase again too. Badly. Something had happened between us last night that I suspected was even more intimate than if he’d stayed.

  “I’m not so sure that’s a good idea.” I swiveled my chair, catching a glimpse of Nolan at his desk. He fixed his stare on his computer screen as the front door shut and Ed finally left. “Or at least, it’s not a very popular idea around here.” I said the last bit almost to myself. Chase’s laugh on the other end of the phone snapped me back to attention.

  “You much in the habit of doing what’s popular, Ariel?” he asked.

  A smile lit me from the inside. “No, actually. I’m more in the habit of doing things other people tell me I can’t.”

  I swear I could almost feel Chase’s warm breath through the phone. He waited for a beat before that sultry laugh reached my ears. “I think that’s what I like about you.”

  “So, what’d you have in mind, Mr. Cutter?” I said.

  “Dinner,” was his answer. “I’ve gotta go out of town for a couple of days. I’ll be back on Friday. I want to take you someplace you’ve never been before.”

  “Oh? That won’t be easy. I’m from Port Azrael too, remember?”

  “I know a place,” he said. “Just outside of town. It’s nice, quiet, good food. The best part is we gotta ride up the coast to get there.”

  Excitement thrummed through me. I almost lost my grip on the phone. The idea of riding with Chase again was something I craved almost as much as his touch. I knew by saying yes, I’d probably be opening myself up to both.

  “You’re saying I shouldn’t wear my hair fancy like I normally do?” Even now, I wore my standard no-frills ponytail.

  “I’m saying you’re perfect however I can get you.”

  There was a challenge and a promise in his answer. I bit my bottom lip and dropped my head. This was dangerous. I could tell myself we’d been casual up until now. The first night, I could blame the tequila. The next night, it had been Chase who stopped things before they went too far. Agreeing to go out with him would take things to a totally different level.

  Ed’s words echoed through me. My father would be rolling in his grave. I wondered if that were true.

  “Ariel?” Chase said.

  “I’m here. I’m just ... thinking.”

  “Don’t. Don’t think. Just answer me. Do you want to take a ride with me or don’t you?”

  I closed my eyes and leaned back in my chair. The memory of Chase’s touch warmed me. My eyes snapped open. “Yes,” was my breathless answer.

  “Good,” he said. “I’ll pick you up at your place. Eight o’clock too late for you for dinner?”

  “No. It’s perfect. I work late on Fridays. We have a reno deadline.”

  “I’ll see you then, baby,” Chase said. Then he clicked off before I could change my mind.

  Oh boy. I had a feeling I was in for the ride of my life.

  Chapter 13

  Ariel

  Friday couldn’t come soon enough.
Over the next few days, I came up with a hundred reasons why this was a bad idea. The crew might get the wrong impression. Ed was right about my father. Where the Dark Saints M.C. led, trouble followed. It was all true. Except a deeper truth fueled me even more.

  I liked how I felt when I was with Chase. He thrilled me in ways I wasn’t used to. It wasn’t just physical, though it was largely that. He’d made an offhand comment the other night that stuck with me. He said he was no fixer-upper. He wasn’t. And yet, beneath that rough exterior and patch, I felt there was something amazing about Chase Cutter, just waiting to be uncovered.

  True to his word, Chase showed up right at eight o’clock. I stood in the hallway waiting. I’d dressed simply, in jeans and a silk blouse. I’d piled my hair into a topknot, pinning it down against the wind.

  Chase’s swagger thrilled me as he dismounted and headed up my walk. When he caught sight of me in the doorway, his smile brightened. I realized then I might never get tired of looking at him. Chase Cutter was a throwback to a different kind of man. He was rugged and rough. Sensuality poured out of him with each step.

  He stopped before mounting the porch steps so he stood below me. His eyes flicked over me and once again I felt bare. He tilted his head and took a beat before sliding his hands up my arms. His body heat seared through the thin white fabric. Three steps above him, I leaned down a bit to reach him. Chase placed a soft kiss on my lips, but energy sizzled between us with the promise of more.

  “You hungry?” he asked.

  I think he meant it as an honest question. My instinctive answer flared inside of me. Yes. God, yes.

  “You gonna tell me where we’re going or am I supposed to be surprised?” I said.