by Catori, Ava
“Thank you,” she said, realizing how much she hated Wyoming in the wild. It was scary. She was used to animals at the zoo, not ones that could openly roam on your property and threaten your life. The most she dealt with in New Jersey were deer, raccoons, and squirrels. Out here, she’d already had a run in with a wolf, and now there was a cougar.
“Good day,” he said, heading back to his car.
Kristin locked her door, and worried about putting Molly out. She should quick put her out, and then she’d be set for a while. She hated how she was afraid to even open the door, thinking the cougar was waiting to pounce. Taking a deep breath, she opened the door and let her dog out.
Kristin heard a crackle of a branch in the distance and jumped. Was it a deer, was it the cougar, or was it simply her imagination?
Rushing Molly back inside, she locked her door, grateful to have the safety of four walls around her.
She couldn’t live here full time, at least not this remotely. If she stayed in Wyoming, she’d have to move to the safety of a development, a suburb with more homes around her. This wasn’t who she was. It might have been Ty’s world, but it wasn’t hers. The idea of being in the middle of nowhere was one thing, but living out here was quite another. She wasn’t prepared for these kinds of things. She pictured sitting on the porch swing, listening to the birds, not worrying about large wild cats.
There was no point in trying to fit into Ty’s world, she belonged in New Jersey. She wasn’t even sure she’d last the full year. It was a novel idea, but reality was different. She missed her street lights, missed her paved roads, and missed her backyard that saw little more than a bird, a squirrel, or maybe a neighborhood tomcat passing through it - small cats, domesticated cats, and not big, scary ones.
Pacing, she realized it bothered her more than she expected. This was probably part of life out here, and maybe you got used to it, but she wasn’t sure it was something she’d ever get used to. She double checked the lock on the door, making sure it was secure.
Nothing ever came of it, and after a week of not seeing anything, she relaxed a little more. Was that what life would be like here, all year. Would she love it one minute and hate it the next, fear taking her over, realizing how alone she was, forced to rely on herself?
She finally got to the point where she could walk out to her truck without constantly glancing over her shoulder fifty times. The cat hadn’t bothered her home, hadn’t attacked Molly, and hadn’t knocked on her door looking for dinner.
With fear behind her once again, she headed into town. She didn’t expect to see Ty’s truck at the market, and was surprised how much she wanted to see him.
He was walking out, as she was walking in. “Hey,” he smiled on seeing her.
Kristin couldn’t hide her grin. “What are you doing here? I thought you were at the farm.”
“I have appointments today. I’ll head back over tonight. My dad’s starting to feel better, so I’ll only be there for about another week or so. Do you want to grab a bite to eat, before I go back tonight? We could do dinner.”
“That would be nice,” she said. “Why don’t you come to my place, and I’ll cook.”
“Sounds like a plan. Does six o’clock work for you? My last appointment is at 4:30.”
“Sure, six o’clock. Do you have any requests? I’m about to go shopping.”
“Anything is fine,” he said, “and by the way, those muffins you made, delicious.”
“Thanks,” she blushed. She thought she’d gotten over her attraction on not seeing him, but with him standing before her, she knew it was still there. Only this time there was electricity in the air. She wondered if he felt it too.
They went their separate ways, but Kristin walked a little lighter, happy to have company later in the evening.
She decided to make the basics, steak with potatoes. She could mash them, and add a bit of cheese for a twist.
When Ty knocked, she greeted him with a smile. He’d missed seeing her smile, and was tired from the extra work he’d taken on. He was trying to juggle his own work with his father’s. A nice dinner with a friend was exactly what he needed.
Watching her move around the kitchen, he couldn’t look away. He was drawn to the woman unlike he’d been drawn to anyone in a long time.
“Can I help?”
“Nope, I’ve got everything under control,” she said. Looking over, she didn’t want to look away. Their gaze locked on each other, nobody saying another word.
She’d stopped paying attention, and as the potatoes boiled over, it snapped her back to reality. Ty laughed, running to lift the pot off the stove, as she turned the heat down. Placing the pot back on the burner, he turned to look at Kristin.
They stood, barely a foot apart, their bodies almost touching, and without thinking Ty brought his hand to Kristin’s cheek, gently stroking it. “You’re so beautiful.”
She blushed, turning away, breaking the moment. Her heart was racing, unsure what to do.
“I’m sorry,” he said quietly.
“No, don’t be,” she looked back at him, her blue eyes full of questions.
“Kristin,” he said, unable to get out any other words.
She stepped closer.
Ty brought his hand back to her face, stroking it gently, and then ran his fingers through her hair. Leaning in, he tenderly kissed her forehead. “I know you need to go slowly.”
She gave a small nod, terrified of what she was feeling. She hadn’t wanted to be kissed in so long. His tender warm lips on her forehead made her feel like a child, safe in the comfort of someone who can take care of you.
Looking up into his eyes, she got lost, knowing she was being pulled in, knowing she wanted more.
Breathing slowly, deeply, they stood locked in the moment – both afraid to move, afraid to break the spell.
It was as if time stood still, and nothing else in the world mattered. Ty’s hand came back to her cheek, and slowly his finger came across her lips, tracing them tenderly. “I want to kiss you,” he said, “but I don’t want you to be upset.”
“I want you to kiss me,” she whispered.
Ty leaned forward, letting his lips brush against Kristin’s, his arms wrapping around her.
Pulling back, she tucked her head against his chest, letting him hold her. As emotions washed through her, she let go of her past, and knew she was ready to step into the future. She didn’t know where it would lead, but it felt right.
The timer on the stove caught them off guard. Jumping out of his arms, she turned the oven’s broiler off.
Nothing was spoken, and getting the steaks out of the oven, she plated them up.
“I just need to mash the potatoes,” she said, barely able to speak. Her head was full of thoughts, swirling around, confusing her, but more than anything, staying busy would keep her out of his arms. She wanted to be in his arms, but needed to move slowly, and it would be too easy to rush things.
Talking was awkward at first, but they found their stride once again. Serving dinner, they discussed the jobs that he was doing on the farm, and talked about his parents. She filled him in on the news of the cougar, and how it scared her for a good week, but then she finally made peace with it, well, as much as she could.
“You don’t get cougars in the suburbs?” He smiled, teasing her.
“New Jersey isn’t known for its wild cats,” she grinned.
“What is it known for?”
“We have amazing beaches. We have boardwalks that kids love with amusements on them, and there’s this one place I used to visit a lot called Long Beach Island. It’s eighteen miles of white sandy beaches, and you could sit out in the sunshine, staring out at the ocean, getting lost in the serenity and calmness of the waves.”
“I’ve never seen the ocean,” he said, like it wasn’t a big deal.
“What, like ever?”
“Nope, I’ve seen lakes, ponds, rivers, and streams, but not the ocean.”
“Oh, i
t’s amazing, Ty. It’s soothing and calm, and yet has an untamed quality to it. You can look out at it, and it goes on and on and on, and you only see the horizon, nothing on the other side. You absolutely must see the ocean at some time in your life. It’s truly breathtaking, just like your mountains.”
“Your face lights up when you describe it. I can see it means a lot to you.”
“Yeah, the beach is one of my favorite places to be. I’ve got a lot of good memories there.”
“You’re going back there, aren’t you?” The reality hit him. No matter how much he enjoyed her company, she wasn’t here to stay. She was a temporary resident, and had no intention of making Wyoming her home. Was he foolish to get involved?
“Yeah, I guess I am eventually.” She knew what he was asking her. This wasn’t her home, she wouldn’t be staying.
Silence hung in the air. Could he risk his heart, knowing she’d be walking away, or could he convince her to give up her eastern home and stay out west with him?
The talking grew quiet, the look between them sad. They both knew what it meant. Why grow closer, only to be ripped apart later.
“I’m sorry,” she finally answered, knowing she’d be leaving.
He nodded. “I should be heading back to the farm. I have a few more things to do this week, before heading home.”
“Sure,” she said, understanding it was easier to walk away – easier to face facts – easier to let go before it hurt too much.
“Thanks for dinner,” he said, stopping to pat Molly on the head. “I’ll let myself out.”
Kristin watched him leave, as the future crumbled. She hadn’t felt anything in this past year, nothing had touched her, and yet for a moment, for a second in time she had hope – hope that she would live and love again.
She heard Ty’s truck pull out of her driveway, and went back to clean the dishes. She should have never risked her heart. It was foolish. She wasn’t even planning on staying in Wyoming. Why would she even think about getting involved? It was immature of her, leading him on, letting him believe they stood a chance, when she knew she was going back to New Jersey.
Cleaning the dishes, with the water running, she didn’t hear him return. The knock at the door took her by surprise.
Opening it, Ty looked at Kristin. “Please just give us a chance,” he said, standing with his heart on his sleeve. “I haven’t felt this way in way too long, and I hate for it to end before we’ve even given it a chance.”
Kristin caught her breath, “I don’t know what to do,” she said, holding the door open so he could follow her inside. “I’m afraid of getting involved and then what happens when it’s time for me to leave?”
“Nothing says you have to leave.”
“My home isn’t here.”
“It could be,” he said, looking down, “if you wanted it to be.”
She didn’t know what to say. They were still getting to know one another, and he wanted her to consider staying – for good. “I can’t look that far ahead, Ty. I like you, but we’re only getting to know one another.”
“Just give us a chance. If it doesn’t work out, you leave, and if it does, you consider staying. You don’t have to make any decisions now, but I’m not ready to say good-bye.”
Kristin sat on the edge of the sofa, dropping her head in her hands. “I’m not sure what to do.”
Kneeling down before her, he took her hand, “Kristin, I know you feel it too.”
She looked into Ty’s eyes, and felt the familiar warmth go through her, the one that said she wanted him. “We can try,” she said quietly, “but we need to go slowly. I don’t want to be a fool to my heart. I need to use my head.”
Taking her hand, he pulled her up to standing. Wrapping his arms around her, “Thank you,” he whispered, “thank you.” His heart hadn’t felt this full in ages. He didn’t know what it was about this woman, but she filled a void that had been empty within him for far too long.
Looking up into his eyes, he sweetly kissed her forehead. “I should go. I need to get back to the farm, but when I get back next week, maybe we can get together.”
“I’d like that,” she smiled softly.
His lips met Kristin’s, and sharing a small, sweet kiss, they parted. Passion was brewing, but they weren’t in a hurry, and knew it was safer to move slowly. He didn’t want to push her away, when she’d only just opened her arms and heart to him.
Heading back to his truck; this time Ty felt like his entire world had brightened just a little bit.
Chapter 7
She couldn’t think about the future, she’d only think about today. They had time right? She’d be here for at least for most of the year. Besides, maybe they’d run their course, have a small fling, and then go their own ways. Only something told her this was different, something she didn’t understand. She only knew that she wanted to be around him, and when he was here, she felt comfortable, safe, and secure. She hadn’t felt that way in a very long time.
She went back to the sink to finish the dishes, and without thinking, dipping her hands into the soapy water, sliced her finger with a steak knife. Snapping her hand out of the sink on contact, she checked it. Quickly pulling the drain, she turned the water on and rinsed the cut. She scolded herself over her carelessness, and checked it again. It was in moments like these that she realized how far away from town she was. Thankfully it wasn’t deep enough to need stitches, but what if it was? She’d have to drive at least forty minutes into town, and she didn’t even have a clue where the nearest hospital was if it was an emergency.
Her good mood slid away, the moment of elation with Ty turned into frustration once again realizing that living in Wyoming was a different world that her suburbia in New Jersey. Maybe if she lived near a larger city, but that damn dart landed on Chester Hills and she never put much thought into how remote it was. It was a good enough reason for her to come out here, but it didn’t mean she had to stay.
But she would stay, Ty was here, her heart told her she wanted to spend time with him, but her fondness for Wyoming, or at least this portion of the state was wearing thin. There was wildlife, dangerous wildlife, roaming freely around the area, amenities were far, and what if there was an emergency? And she most certainly wasn’t looking forward to the weather – winter would be an eye opener living this far out of town. She didn’t think this through…and realized it was a mistake.
Maybe fate had brought her here. Maybe she was supposed to meet Ty, but Kristin couldn’t honestly see herself staying here. This didn’t feel like home, and as much as she loved the peaceful feeling she got much of the time, she missed her shopping malls, franchise restaurants, and gas stations on every corner just the same.
Digging through the drawers and cabinets, she found a bandage wedged in the corner of the bathroom vanity drawer. Pulling the adhesive strip onto her finger, she dropped onto the sofa, feeling frustrated that her mind jumped back and forth between wanting to spend time with Ty, and knowing that Ty called Wyoming home.
She told him they could try, they could take things slowly, and she wanted to. She wanted to spend time with him. He made her heart sing, but what did their future hold if he wanted to stay in Wyoming and she went back to New Jersey? Shaking her head, she forced herself to think about something else, anything else. When it came down to it, she could only take it one day at a time, and couldn’t control the outcome. She’d just see where things went.
Ty drove back to the farm, excited that she was ready to move forward. He didn’t know what the future held for them, but he knew he wanted to spend time with her. Kristin made him happy. When he’d see her, his face would light up with a smile. His heart felt full, and he wanted to pull her into his arms and sweep her off her feet. He wanted to kiss her passionately, make her his own. One day at a time, he reminded himself, one day at a time.
He’d be back in a week’s time, and they’d have dinner. He had plenty of time to think about things, and plenty of time to figure out how
to convince her to stay.
When he returned, he brought her flowers. He’d picked out some daisies, and cleaned up before going to see her. Only on knocking she wasn’t there. He should have called first, she was probably in town. He decided to wait on the swing, only when she still didn’t show for a while, he headed home, leaving the flowers on the swing. At least she’d see he’d been here.
When he still didn’t hear from her, he started to worry. She should have been home by now. She would have called. He tried to reach her, but she didn’t answer, damn spotty signal.
He drove over again, but the flowers were right where he’d left them. He looked in the window, but couldn’t see anything noticeable. He couldn’t see Molly. Her truck was gone, so she obviously wasn’t here. He drove into town, looking for her, but still couldn’t find her. He didn’t pass her on the roads, she wasn’t parked in town.
His heart dropped. Did she get scared? Did she run away, going back home? Ty’s stomach knotted up, as he turned his truck back home. A lump sat in his throat. She was nowhere to be found. She hadn’t called and left him a message, and he knew she was scared. Had he pushed her too hard, sharing his feeling so soon, kissing her, holding her…did she need to escape from her own emotions?
When Kristin got home, she saw the flowers on the swing. She smiled, sorry that she’d missed him. It was too late to call him now. She’d call in the morning. If she hadn’t cracked her tooth on that walnut, she wouldn’t have had to go a couple towns over looking for a dentist who was open late and could take her in. The drive was crazy enough, trying to find her way to an area she’d never been, and then she got lost trying to find her way home. Thankfully he’d been able to put a temporary crown over it. She felt so much better, and was grateful the dentist fit her in on such short notice.
She was proud of herself for staying calm and figuring out what to do. Her own small town didn’t have a dentist. Settling in for the night, she propped the flowers up in a vase of water. She hadn’t expected him, it was a nice surprise. She wished she would have been here to see him. Kristin was excited to be back in Ty’s arms, finally knowing it’s where she belonged – at least for now.