Just Say The Word

by Tiffany Patterson

  My head shot back. “Wow. So it’s been a decade since you two have seen each other?”

  “Yeah. At first, I wasn’t too keen on seeing her but she gave me her card and I started to think that maybe it was time Monique got to meet another family member of hers. She seems genuinely apologetic for how she treated me, and wants to get to know both Monique and I.” Sandra gave a one shoulder shrug as if to say she was still on the fence about how she felt, but willing to give her grandmother a break.

  “You’re the only family Monique has? Her father’s side of th—”

  “No.” She shook her head adamantly, and just before she closed her eyes I swore I caught a glimpse of fear. What the hell was that about?

  I wondered if her daughter’s father had threatened her in some way. Maybe to keep her quiet about their daughter. I’ve heard of worse shit.

  I angled my head when Sandra moved to stand in front of me, arms folded over her breasts.

  “I don’t tell most people what I’ve just told you.”

  “I’m not most people.”

  She nodded and looked down and then up staring at me again. “You’re not, and I don’t go on many dates or get caught up in relationships easily.”

  “Elaborate.”

  She glanced over my shoulder before pinning me with her gaze once again. “Do you know what you want with me? Because I-I’m feeling a little, or lot, off kilter here and it’d be nice to know that I’m not the only one.”

  I lifted my hand, cupping her chin, and stepped closer. “You’re not, little one.”

  Her eyes widened at the new pet name that had just fallen from my lips as if I’d been calling her that for years. The tremble in her bottom lip forced me to lean down and suck it between my teeth, going over it with my tongue before releasing it. It was a quick move, not quite a kiss, but it solidified something for me—I’d been unsure right until that moment that I had actually wanted what was happening between Sandra and I to happen.

  And I wasn’t one for doubting.

  Now the doubts were laid to rest.

  “So your grandmother raised you?”

  She nodded.

  “And you don’t have a relationship with your mother at all?”

  She gave me a funny look, lifting her eyebrow before nodding.

  “Just checking, ‘cause that first day I dropped you off at your job, you said your mother was going to pick you up.”

  Her eyes widened and she covered her mouth.

  I began chuckling. “It’s cool.”

  “I didn’t know you and-”

  I laughed some more before saying, “It’s cool. I knew you were lying then anyway. Finish telling me about growing up with your grandmother,” I ordered as I took her left hand in my right, continuing around the third floor.

  “What do you want to know?”

  “Everything.”

  “Everything? That’s a lot.”

  “I told you, I’ve got time.”

  Smiling, she averted her gaze, shrugging. “She was a district court judge and I looked up to her. She was very strict. Always demanded I participate in tons of activities and keep my head in the books. It wasn’t too much of a chore, honestly, though. I loved reading and learning new things, which I’ve already told you.”

  “Right, your weekend trips to the library for fun,” I joked.

  Sandra laughed, nodding, before continuing. “I enjoyed being on the chess team and in the chorus much more than hanging out with the athletes or the popular crowd. Not that they’d have me anyway. I bet you were one of the jocks.”

  I glanced down, realized that my arm was slung over her shoulder and she was leaned into my body. The move had felt so casual and normal that I didn’t realize we were locked arm in arm, with hers around the back of my waist.

  “I dropped out of school at fourteen. But yeah, before then I was a jock, on the basketball team.”

  Her head popped up and I pushed one of the curls that’d fallen over her face out of the way.

  “You dropped out?”

  I nodded. “My pops died when I was thirteen and my mom fell apart. I had a younger sister who was only seven at the time. After months of notices and phone calls from bill collectors and the bank threatening to foreclose on our house, I figured my mom wouldn’t do anything so I needed to. I connected with some of the people my father had worked for to earn money and eventually stopped going to school in favor of working.”

  Her head shot back, a wrinkle appearing in between her eyebrows, as we walked down the stairs to the second floor. “Your father’s colleagues let a fourteen year old work with them? What did he do for a living?”

  I chuckled. She really was as innocent as she appeared sometimes.

  “He damn sure wasn’t a judge.” Like her grandmother had been. “He was a drug dealer. Granted, he wasn’t an errand boy or the type that stood out on street corners, but he was what he was.” I wasn’t ashamed of my father’s or my history. “He hadn’t gone past the tenth grade but he was smart. He wanted to raise his family out of the neighborhood he grew up in. So, when my mom got pregnant, he married her, and worked his ass off to move us to a better part of Williamsport. He sent me to some of the best private schools in the city and pushed me to play sports and study hard. He didn’t want the same life for me. For a long time, I didn’t even know what he did for a living. He would often just say he was taking care of ‘business.’ I was thirteen when I found out the truth.”

  I ground my back teeth, hating the memory of that date and all of the horrible shit I’d said to him afterwards. Words I could never take back because soon after he was dead.

  “He did what he had to, to take care of you all. It wasn’t the best situation, but the way you still talk about him tells me he loved you all deeply and he did his best.”

  I paused, stopping in front of her so we were face-to-face, lifting her fingers to my lips, kissing them.

  “We’re even.”

  She gave me a perplexed look.

  “You told me something about you that you don’t share with others and I just did the same.” I was about to go a step further. “My father wasn’t the only one who had to make hard decisions. Once he died my mother could barely get out of bed. He’d been the rock of the family. All our extended family had made money through him. After his death, the family we thought had our backs either went to work for people who my father despised or they just fell off the face of the earth. We were all on our own. I was on my own. But I had my sister to look after. My father always said if something happened to him, I was the man of the house. So, I went to an uncle who I hadn’t seen in a while and asked for a job. He didn’t hesitate to put me on. I’m a hustler and as smart as my ol’ man. It didn’t take long for me to make money. I hated every minute of it, but I did it because the thought of Charlotte or even my mother starving sickened me more than selling poison.”

  “Don’t be ashamed for choices you made at fourteen.”

  I shook my head. “I’m not. I stacked money for years, and as soon as I turned eighteen, I started looking for my first investment property. My business today is built on that same hustle and intelligence I used back then. But it was also built on blood money. There isn’t a day that goes by that I don’t remember that.”

  “Do you still …”

  I shook my head. “I’ve long been out of that world, but I still have associates who never left that life behind.” Keeping associates in that world came in handy when I needed to find out information about properties or their owners, but I didn’t need to explain that to Sandra at the moment.

  My brows rose when Sandra’s hand lifted, cupping my cheek. A smile crossed her face. “We would’ve never ran in the same circles in high school.”

  I laughed. “Damn sure wouldn’t have. I’ll be damned if I was joining someone’s chess club.”

  She giggled, lowering her head. “You’re not going to let me live that down, are you?”

  “Hell no. That or that bou
gie ass classical music you’re always listening to.” I always heard the music in the background whenever I called her at home.

  “I’ll make you fan of it.”

  I frowned. “Doubtful.”

  We spent the next forty-five minutes exploring the museum exhibits on the second and first floors. I didn’t want the night to end. I wasn’t even surprised by that feeling any longer. I’d come to accept that wanting to prolong my time with Sandra in any capacity I could was just a facet of this developing relationship.

  “Thank you for dinner and the museum.”

  We were right in front of her door, yet again. She was whispering, certain that Monique was still awake and would open up the door once she realized her mother was on the other side.

  “Thank you for wearing those jeans,” I responded, eyeing the curvature of her hips in the pants she wore.

  “Oops!” She blurted out, covering her mouth when her laughter bubbled out, louder than she’d intended.

  “Shhh, you’re going to get us in trouble by the warden!” I whispered, close to her face.

  Monique had already sent her one text asking when she’d get home.

  Sandra giggled. “I know, isn’t she terrible?”

  “Just like her mama.”

  Her eyes widened and she swatted my chest. I used that as an opportunity to grab her by the hand, pulling her into me. Lowering my head, I covered her lips with my own. Someone moaned. At that point, I didn’t know if it was her or me, but the sound turned me on, shooting straight to my dick. My hands moved down passed her hips to that ass that’d been taunting me for the past three hours of our date. Sandra gasped into my mouth when I squeezed it and pulled her into me. I was sure she could feel the length growing in my pants. However, she didn’t back away, so I kept kissing. Allowing myself to get comfortable with the feeling of her in my arms.

  When it became too much I pulled back, my hands going to her waist again. “You need to go inside.”

  Sandra panted, her eyes holding a glassy look. “Yes. Inside. To my child.”

  I nodded and swallowed. “What are you doing this Saturday?”

  She frowned, thinking. “Taking Monique to the zoo. The weather is supposed to be in the fifties and she’s been asking for months if we could go. Kayla’s sister-in-law, Michelle, and her husband, Carter, are brining Diego.” She hesitated. “Would you like to come? Wait, no, never mind.”

  My eyes narrowed.

  “You probably have other things to do besides spend the day at the zoo with a bunch of kids. Forget I—”

  “I’ll be there. What time do you want me to pick you both up?”

  Her mouth flapped open a little.

  I tapped her chin with my forefinger, closing it. “How about ten a.m.?” I suggested when she didn’t say anything.

  She nodded slowly.

  “I’ll be here.” I placed another quick kiss to her lips before taking a step back. I watched as she turned and pushed her key into the doorknob, unlocking it and then entering. She gave me a smile and wave over her shoulder before disappearing behind the door.

  Yup. I was in this shit now.

  Chapter Ten

  Sandra

  “I need an STD test.”

  Kayla’s head popped up from her desk, eyes wide, and her mouth fell open. Obviously, my impromptu declaration in the middle of her office had surprised her. It was a Wednesday afternoon and I knew she stayed late on most Wednesdays seeing patients. I left work a few minutes early just so I could drive over and ask her to give me the test.

  “You want an STD test?”

  I nodded.

  “You and Damon have already—”

  I started shaking my head. “No, but it’s happening.” And soon, though I didn’t say that part out loud. “You said he and I need to have a conversation, so I figured getting a test would be the first place to start.”

  Kayla nodded slowly, as she pushed back from her glass desk and stood. “Do you want to talk about this?” she questioned after she’d come around the desk, standing over me as I sat in the loveseat in her office.

  I shrugged. “Not much to say.” I rubbed my hands together, feeling stupid. “Why do I feel like this?”

  Kayla turned the leather chair reserved for patients around so she could sit down, facing me.

  “Feel like what?”

  “Like a damn teenager. I’m twenty-eight years old for God’s sake. I have a ten-year-old daughter. And yet, the thought of being physically intimate with Damon … I was the girl who swore up and down she’d remain a virgin until she got married. I wanted to do it perfectly. Fall in love, get married, then have the two point five kids and the white picket fence and all that.”

  “Life doesn’t always work out the way we planned as kids.”

  “Psh. You’re telling me.” I frowned. “You know I have dated since Monique was born. Not frequently because I found most guys just assumed that because I already had a child that I’d have no problem spreading my legs to them without any sort of commitment. But Damon’s different.” I looked up at Kayla. “I didn’t expect him to be but he’s patient and has been vulnerable with me and let me be that with him. He doesn’t treat Monique like an inconvenience. We went to the zoo last week and I swore she had a better time with him than me. Hell, I think he had a better time with her than with me.”

  Kayla and I both giggled.

  “I’m sure that’s not true.”

  I shook my head. “No.” My eyes roamed up to the ceiling as I remembered when Carter and Michelle had taken the kids into one of the gift shops at the zoo, leaving Damon and I to see the gorillas. When one charged the window directly in front of me, I jumped back, right into Damon’s awaiting arms. He held me tight and leaned down, getting close to my ear, his beard tickling the side of my neck. He whispered that he wouldn’t let anything get to me. And I believed him.

  “I’m not making a mistake, am I?” I asked, looking Kayla in the eye. I was much too far gone to determine this on my own.

  Leaning in, Kayla cupped my hands in hers. “Only you can decide that.”

  I sighed, rolling my eyes. “You’re no help. The last man I trusted …” I trailed off, looking over Kayla’s shoulder.

  She squeezed my hand.

  “That was a long time ago and you were only eighteen years old. You’re a grown woman now, who’s been a single parent for a decade and been doing a pretty damn good job, if you ask me. And I’ll remind you, you did ask me.”

  I laughed and then moved toward her, wrapping my arms around Kayla’s shoulders. “I love you. Thank you for being such a great doctor and an even better friend.”

  “I love you back. Oh, and if Damon hurts you I’ll just have Josh kick his ass in the ring, okay?”

  I pulled back, my brows pinched. “Ring?”

  Kayla’s lips tightened. “Yeah, well, I have a patient arriving in five minutes.”

  “Wait, what did you mean by—”

  “We need to draw your blood for those tests you asked for.”

  I’d almost forgotten my entire reason for stopping by. I nodded and then followed Kayla into the section of her office where patients had their blood drawn.

  “How’s that pump working for Monique?” she asked as she began inserting the needle.

  I flinched at the first bite into my skin but then relaxed. “It’s going well so far. I don’t have to wake up in the middle of the night, every few hours to check her insulin.”

  “But I’m sure you can’t help getting up still.”

  I nodded. “It’s only been a few weeks. But I am getting better sleep and so is Monique.”

  “That’s fantastic. I wished they had those things around when I was Monique’s age. Would’ve saved me and my parents a lot of heartache and lost sleep.”

  I nodded. Kayla had been a type 1 diabetic as a child also. Unfortunately, her illness had worn out the organs in her body to the point that she eventually needed a kidney transplant. She got both a kidney and pan
creatic transplant which ultimately cured her diabetes, alleviating the need for constant insulin shots. However, she still needed to take immunosuppressant medications to keep her body from rejecting the foreign organs. I didn’t even want to think of Monique having to endure anything like that. Thankfully, my daughter’s diabetes was well managed.

  “Thanks. How long until the results come back?” I questioned, watching as Kayla carefully handled the vial of blood she’d just drawn from me.

  “Why? Got a hot date?”

  I grinned and looked down.

  “You do, don’t you?”

  “I’m going over his place this weekend. He’s having a special chef give us a private cooking class.”

  “That Damon’s so damn smooth. I knew he’d wear you down. I’ll put a rush on it and I should be able to have the results to you by Friday.”

  “Thanks, Kayla.”

  “Anytime. Give my niece a hug and kiss for me. I won’t be a Pilates tomorrow. I told Patience I’d help her with the boys after work. Aaron’s out of town until Friday.”

  Patience was another one of Kayla’s sisters-in-law.

  “Okay. You’ll be missed but family is family.”

  She smiled.

  I swallowed down the envy I felt. Kayla hadn’t come from a big family. She was an only child to her two parents. But when she’d married Josh, his family became hers, and she got along well with her sisters-in-law. They were always having dinner at one another’s homes and their ever-extending family was growing. Both her sisters-in-law had had recent births and Josh’s younger brother, Tyler, recently revealed he’d secretly wed on their family’s yacht while in the Caribbean, and his new wife, Destiny, was pregnant.

  “I’ll give you a call on Sunday,” Kayla stated as we hugged. “Or maybe Monday. You might be busy Sunday.”

  I lowered my lashes, knowing what she was getting at.

  “I’ll definitely call by Friday afternoon so you can pick up your results.”

  “Thanks.”

  I wasn’t worried about the results. I knew what they’d say. It was more that I wanted to have something to give Damon to show him what I was ready for. I pushed out a breath as I entered the elevator to exit Kayla’s office building. At least, I hoped I was ready.