“Why are you wearing that?”
She blinked. “I–what?”
“That shirt. You were wearing that color the day you walked away from me.”
“I, I didn’t realize it. I swear I didn’t.” Realization dawned. “Is that why you were so angry when you arrived?”
He searched her face for several moments, then relaxed and leaned away from her, his arms falling away. “Yes, it was. I thought you were playing games, but I believe you weren’t. I don’t know why I should believe anything you say, but I do.”
Her shoulders sagged and she dragged her hands through her hair. “Look, can we do this later? You can insult me all you want when we’re alone, but not in front of Lily.”
He stiffened, then leaned closer again. “And that’s another thing. Why did you name her Lily?”
“You know why,” she whispered, then shook her head. “Not now, okay? Ask me anything later, after she’s asleep. We’ve only got another minute before she gets distracted and comes looking for us.”
He pursed his lips, but nodded. “You’re right. We’ll wait. Now tell me: what’s the best way to approach her with this conversation? You’re the one who knows her best.”
She could feel the pain in his words, pain that she’d caused, pain that she’d had to cause to protect him. God, what would he do if he found out? If he realized who was really behind their separation?
She cleared her throat. “Keep it simple and keep it straight. Lily gets easily distracted, but if she recognizes this is serious, she’ll sit still for a little while. If you can trust me a little more, it might be best if I started the conversation.”
He stiffly nodded, reluctantly agreeing. “How do you think she’ll take this?”
“I honestly don’t know. She’s asked about her father a few times and, as I mentioned, I’ve told her your name. We can start there. She doesn’t dwell on things, but her emotions tend to be extreme: happy and excited, or crying and distraught. She’s rarely ever just calm, unless she’s sleeping or at pre-school.”
“All right. There are just two other things to discuss before we speak to her.”
Her fingers began toying with the edge of her shirt. “What?”
“First, I’ve mentioned this before, but for security, you’ll need to move into the castle.”
She automatically shook her head. “We need to talk about that.”
“And we will. But surely, given everything that’s happened to my family in the last year alone, you realize there are forces out there that will stop at nothing to bring us down. The latest was when they tried to murder my new sister-in-law right before her wedding. No one is safe, and I need to manage that risk. If you think I’m not going to do everything in my power to protect you both, you clearly don’t remember me as well as you think you do.”
“Oh, I remember, all right,” she grumbled. She couldn’t hide from this anymore, couldn’t put off the decision for another day.
Pros: she and Liliana would be safe at the castle. Her lack of steady income would be inconsequential, not to mention no more cooking or cleaning.
Cons: she liked the cooking and cleaning, at least when she did them for Liliana. She liked knowing she could take care of her child, to prove her parents wrong, and to prove to herself she was worth something.
If they lived in the castle, she was also sure to see the person who’d driven her and Lorenzo apart years ago. It was uncomfortable, but it wasn’t unexpected.
They were, after all, a member of his family.
She took a deep breath. There was only one choice she could make. “Okay. I know you’re right. We would be safer in the castle, and I’ll do anything to protect my daughter. So, I’ll agree to move into the castle.”
His chest swelled in triumph.
“But, there are conditions we need to discuss first.”
“Of course. I fully expected that.”
She nodded. “What’s the second thing?”
“I’ll need a paternity test, so we’ll have to walk her through the process.” She stood in mute shock while he continued. “I’ve brought what we need with me, and I know a discreet doctor who will complete the test.”
Anger, hot and volcanic, gurgled inside her. “You! I can’t! You don’t believe–”
His hands wrapped around her arms quickly and tightly. “Of course, I bloody well believe she’s mine. Just look at her. Of course, she’s my daughter.”
She relaxed only slightly. “Then why the hell–”
“Because I’m a prince. If anyone doubts that Lily has my protection, we have medical proof she’s mine. And, I’m sorry to say, that not everyone in my family will believe she’s mine, even with the proof looking them straight in the face. I don’t want to do it. I need to do it. Do you understand?”
She pursed her lips, arguing with herself whether or not to tell him something. She decided he needed to know. “I understand. There’s something you should know, however: a DNA test was already done, using blood taken from you at the hospital. So, that’s not something we need to do.”
“You have the results?”
“Yes, I do.”
“So why were you so upset at the thought of a paternity test?”
“I was upset by the thought you didn’t believe me, and wanted a paternity test to prove she was yours. I may not be the best person, but I’d never lie to you about something like that.”
“I know. I told you I believed you.”
She nodded, satisfied with his answer. “Come on, then. Let’s go speak to Liliana.” When he didn’t let her go, she stared expectantly. “Something else?”
His voice was low and soft. “You’re beautiful, you know that?”
She sucked in a breath.
“I didn’t think it was possible for you to get more beautiful, but you did.” He tucked a lock of her hair behind her ear, then stepped back. “After you.”
“Thank you,” she breathed, then walked slowly back into the living room. Lily’s cup sat precariously on the edge of the table, and she’d found the remote and was pressing random buttons. Lily rushed forward. “Let me take that, honey.”
“I wanna watch princess show.”
The cartoon about a girl princess’s life was one of her favorites. “Maybe later.” She flipped off the television and scooted the almost empty cup back on firmer ground. “We want to talk to you for a few minutes, okay?”
“Okay, Mama.”
She settled Liliana on the couch between her and Lorenzo, cleared her throat, and started one of the most difficult conversations of her life.
Chapter Seven
Lorenzo leaned back against the couch, his head tilted up at the ceiling, his hands linked loosely across his stomach. His eyes stared at the cracked and stained ceiling, but his mind whirled with other thoughts.
It was done.
Liliana knew she was a princess. She knew he was her father, and that they’d be moving into the castle. Liliana had accepted everything so smoothly, so easily, he wondered again why Lily had never told him about her pregnancy.
Over four years of her life, plus the months of pregnancy – all gone. He’d never get those back.
Lily walked in, rubbing her arms, and he tilted his head to the side. “Is she asleep?”
Lily nodded and walked to the couch. “She was so excited, I wasn’t sure she would, but she did after three stories.”
“How many does it usually take?”
Lily smiled softly. “Sometimes four, sometimes more or less. Depends on her mood.” She leaned over to pour some coffee, and put cream and sugar in it. “I’m going to warm my coffee up. Would you like any?”
He shook his head, and she wandered into the kitchen.
He’d been right earlier; she’d only grown more beautiful in the years past. Having a child had added delectable curves to her figure, but also maturity. It was easy to admit he was still attracted to her, and not simply because of her body, or the fact that she was the mother of
his child.
He waited for her to walk back in and settle on the opposite end of the couch before he spoke. “Since when do you take cream and sugar?” At her startled glance, he said softly, “I remember things, too, Lily.”
She swallowed and he followed the line of her slender throat as she did. “I couldn’t really drink coffee while I was pregnant, and eventually just stopped. When I tried to pick it up again after I stopped breastfeeding, I found I didn’t like it quite the same as I did before. Pregnancy can change your taste in subtle ways like that.”
He nodded then leaned forward, and rested his elbows on his knees. His eyes barely took in the well-worn but bright rug underneath his feet. “Why?”
“I’m not sure why. A doctor might know better than me.”
“You know what I’m really asking.”
“Yes, I do.” Her mug thudded on the table as she put it down with shaky hands. “I’m sorry.” Her voice was barely a breath. “I’m so sorry.” She buried her head in her hands, her shoulders shaking. He never could take a woman crying.
He shifted next to her, his arm going around her shoulder, her body curling instinctively into his. God, it felt good to hold her again. The dance they’d shared at Alex’s wedding hadn’t been enough, not nearly, but he couldn’t think about a future with her right now. He – they – had to think of their little girl. Because of that, he had to know the truth.
“Did you avoid telling me about the baby because you thought I wouldn’t be a good father?”
She stilled unnaturally against him and pushed back, her hands falling away to reveal wide, wet eyes and an open mouth. “What?”
He cleared his throat; it still wasn’t easy to say, even after all these years. “You saw me. You saw me when I got back from Africa. I wasn’t well mentally.”
“So?”
“So, I really wasn’t right. I was suffering from–”
“I know what you were suffering from. I was a volunteer at that hospital, wasn’t I, when I met you?”
“I know, but–”
She gripped his hand tight, her hands still damp from her tears. “It was never about your mental state. Do you believe me? It was never about who you were. I loved who you were before treatment. I loved who you were after treatment. There’s no shame in mental illness, and you got help. You were treated. I loved you. I never wanted to leave you.” Her breath hitched and tears pooled in her red-rimmed eyes. “Never.”
Loved. Past tense. He ignored the pain in his heart to focus on what they needed to discuss. “Then why did you leave me?”
She took a deep breath. “There is something you should know. About my past. If we’re going to live in the castle with you, you need to know.”
Jesus. “What is it?”
“When we first met, I was just a volunteer and you were a patient. Volunteers weren’t supposed to share personal details about themselves with the patients. So, when we first met and you asked why I came to Valleria, I didn’t tell you everything.”
“Your father’s embezzlement.”
Her mouth dropped open, then shut. “You knew?”
He shook his head. “Not until after you left me. I eventually looked into your family a little, and discovered what had happened.”
She was hesitant when she spoke. “You didn’t, er, discover anything else?”
“Like what?”
“Like my involvement in all of that?”
He sat back. “You embezzled money from your father’s company?”
She furiously shook her head. “No. No, of course not. But my father and brother forged my signature on several documents. I could have been implicated.”
Jesus. “That’s why you came to Valleria? To escape potential criminal charges? But we have excellent relations with Italy, including extradition agreements. You couldn’t hide here forever.”
“I know. My family wanted to redeem our reputation, which was hard enough on a regular day, much less with an embezzlement scandal. I didn’t find out about the forged documents until after my father and brother were arrested. They threatened to leak it to the press unless I did what I could to redeem the family name.”
She sighed. “I tried doing some volunteer work and leaked it occasionally to the press, so we could get in the papers for my charity work and be seen as doing good, but it was useless. The paparazzi were vicious to us in Italy, stalking and following us, and those articles about me were never front-page news. It wasn’t enough, and I needed a break. So, I decided to do my volunteer work here, in Valleria. Since the authorities hadn’t discovered the forged documents yet, I didn’t see it as running away. I just wanted some peace, just for a little while.”
He never expected that she’d been treated like this by her own family. “Why didn’t you just tell the authorities what had happened?”
“I was afraid. My parents…my parents weren’t kind. My mother, if you can believe it, was even more ruthless than my father. I wanted to escape them and that was my chance. Besides, I didn’t have any idea where the documents were, or how they were connected to the embezzlement. My parents had that information, and they weren’t keen on sharing it with me. How could I go to the authorities claiming I was being unjustly implicated without any evidence? I doubt they would have believed me.”
“God, Lily.”
“It wasn’t so bad. I actually enjoy volunteer work, and I somehow got connected to someone at the VSO, who placed me at the hospital. We’d already fallen in…that is, we were already together when the documents were finally discovered.”
Her eyes drifted away as she remembered, and she was suddenly in a trance. “I’ll never forget it. I was at the hospital and was told a patient wanted to speak with me. That wasn’t unusual, so I went. It didn’t even occur to me that there wasn’t a patient in the room I was directed towards. I just went in and found someone waiting for me.”
Dread filled his stomach. “Someone?”
Her arms were wrapped around her again, like a protective barrier. Her eyes, broken free of the trance, moved to his. “They told me they’d found the documents, and that they’d help me prove I was innocent. They said they’d do that if I promised to leave you. If I didn’t, they’d reveal my secret to the authorities and the press, and make my family pay as well.”
Shock struck him like a lightning bolt. “Someone forced you to leave me? Threatened you? Who the fuck was it?”
“It doesn’t matter.”
As a fucking prince, he should have been able to protect her. “The fuck it doesn’t. You should have told me. All those years ago, you should have told me.”
She pleaded with him. “I couldn’t. You were still recovering. You were barely out of the hospital by then, and you still had work to do. If I’d known I was pregnant then, I would have, but I didn’t discover that until nearly a month after I’d gone.”
“Lily, I would have helped you. I wouldn’t have flown off into some kind of rage–”
She gripped his hand tight again. “I know. I know. Please, just listen. I signed all kinds of confidentiality agreements when I left you. The person involved helped discreetly clear my name with the Italian authorities, but only if I signed them. When I found out I was pregnant, I tried to reach out to the person who helped me, because I needed their permission to speak to you.”
A wave of anger gripped him. What the hell kind of person would force them apart, then force her to sign agreements and prevent her from contacting him? “Permission? To speak to the father of your child?”
“I tried every year on Lily’s birthday. I tried a lot more than once a year, but always then, because she’d always ask me where her papa was on her birthday.”
His chest compressed. His little girl. No wonder she’d been so accepting of him and all of it. She’d been waiting for years for him to appear.
“I didn’t get through until a month or so before the royal wedding. They didn’t believe me when I told them about Lily at first, but they saw her pictures.
You saw the resemblance instantly, and so did they. The DNA test I mentioned? They’re the ones who had it done, only it wasn’t five years ago, it was just before the wedding. Since you always donate blood regularly, they used some of your blood still stored at the hospital.”
She licked her tear-stained lips. “When they realized I’d had your child, they secured me an invitation to the wedding. I thought maybe they’d reach out to you before it took place, to let you know about me, but when we spoke it was clear my attending the reception was a surprise to you.”
“But why the wedding?”
“The person involved suggested I approach you at the wedding. I wanted a simple meeting with just us, face-to-face, but I had no choice.”
“Who took away your choices? Who?”
“I can’t say. I won’t say. Even now I’m worried that if I do, I risk someone taking Lily away from me.”
His expression hardened. Who was she so afraid of?
She clutched tighter to his hands, her eyes desperate. “Please don’t take Lily away from me. Please. I’ll fight with everything I have if you or anyone else tries.”
God, had he been such a fool? How could she think he’d steal Lily away from her? “I’ll repeat what I said on the beach: I’d never hurt you and Lily. Never. That means I’d never try to seek sole custody. You’re her mother. Of course, she needs you.”
She sagged against him, her head dropping against his chest. “Then what do you want from me?”
He buried a hand in her hair – God, he’d forgotten how soft it was – and maneuvered her face up to meet his. “Will you ever tell me who acted to keep us apart?”
She shook her head immediately. “I can’t. I told you.”
“Will you tell me if they try to do that again?”
“We’re not…together anymore.”
The truth hit him harder than he thought it would. “I know, but if someone is threatening you, they’re also threatening Liliana. We can’t have that.”
“Would you…”
Lorenzo & Lily (Royals of Valleria #8) Page 8