by Pam Uphoff
"Locked up, if they've got any sense. Let's check Brian's office."
Eldon followed them as they crowded into the office, and Holly homed in on the locked cabinet.
Eldon snickered and reached out mentally to unlock it. This could be funny.
"Those are the bottles Heso used when he gave me that magic potion. See, they've got fakey looking rune-style lettering. Red hair? Lose weight? Ha."
One of the guys reached in and pulled out a bottle of wine. "And he mixed it up in wine?"
"Yep. What are you doing?"
"I'm going to test this one, that says big genitals. Hey, good wine!" He poured wine into the coffee mug on Rior 's desk and added a bit from the small jar and drank again. It got passed around the guys, and refilled with wine and with snickering something else was added.
"Here Holly, this will make you into a witch."
"Shh, be quiet. There's a w not a b there. Okay, okay, I'll drink it, just be quiet." She drank a bit, then more, then drained it.
"I've got one for wizard." Julia said. "And here's immortality."
The guys poured those into the next mug full of wine, and all of them, sisters included, drank some of it. Then they started looking at the hair colors, the eye colors, intelligence, metabolism, balance. Some, some of them they tried, others were discarded. Eldon was feeling a bit alarmed, he might need some of those himself, after all. But before he stepped in, one of the guys kissed Julia, and then everything snowballed as it usually did when that wine was involved. With the flashlights abandoned to shine every which way, he joined the orgy, oohh, that Holly was hot! About midnight the wine was all gone, and he dragged the slumbering idiots back through the hole in the wall, fondled hot little Holly one last time, then fixed the wall. He straightened Rior's office and headed home.
***
"Oh. My. God. I don't believe I did that." Holly whimpered faintly and sipped hot tea with shaky hands.
"Nor do I. I know better than to get drunk when I'm preggers. Speaking of which, how old is your implant?"
"Three years. Not a problem. How am I ever going to face the guys again?"
"With difficulty. You know, we may not have found any date rape drugs, but they could get rich with an aphrodisiac like that." Julia poured more tea. Most of it went in the cup.
"No kidding. Why worry about curing baldness, when you can trigger a four-hour-long orgy?" Holly mopped up spilled tea. "Good grief all four of them, and they even did each other."
"Yeah, they may have trouble facing each other, come to that."
"And I seem to recall some big fat guy, blond, maybe? The light was pretty bad." Holly sipped more tea.
"Yeah, flashlights getting kicked around on the floor. Yeah, the big guy. He was all over you."
They both winced as the front door slammed.
Their mother stalked into the kitchen and glared at them. "I didn't raise you two to be drunken sluts."
"Well, you tried not to." Holly winced away from the tears her mother was trying to subdue behind a foreboding expression. "Sorry, Mom. We were . . . Oh. Never mind."
"Here are the aspirins, drink more water." Her mother sighed and put the rest of the groceries away.
Julia sighed. "There were six of us, and only one bottle of wine. We couldn't have had more than a couple of skimpy glasses. I know I used to be a cheap date, because I couldn't drink much, but this is ridiculous."
"You are ignoring all those little shots on the side. Not that there were many of those, either." Holly put her head down on the table for a long moment. Cringed when the phone rang.
"Hello? Just a moment, I'll get her."
Holly took the phone her mother handed her. "Hello? Umm, Castles of Air . . . "
"I'm with the High Marks Management firm. We have sold the Jones Creek Business park and will be activating the early termination clause of all leases. We are e-mailing you the details."
Holly stared at the receiver. "Sold . . . termination?" She cringed as her raised voice hurt her head.
"Yes. Details are in the email. Good day."
Holly blinked at the phone. "I'm going back to bed. There is no other way to face today."
She slept for about three centuries and felt better on arising. "In fact I feel pretty good. Julia?" She barged into her sister's room, empty, then downstairs.
"Here, I printed it out." Julia waved a sheaf of papers at her. "We have a month to move out. What are we going to do?"
"Get a big rental storage unit, unless we find someplace we can afford right away. We can work out of the house for a while. You know we don't usually have more than a couple of jobs a month, except at Easter and the Fourth of July until next Thanksgiving. In fact this'll save us a ton of money."
Chapter Fifteen
31 January 2000
"Well, that's really inconvenient." Rior scowled at the email.
"Hehehehehe. For your love life. Do ya know those orgasm spells? Maybe she'll come with us, eh?"
"It is inconvenient for the business, Eldon." Rior could hear the chill in his voice.
"Or timely, you know we're all bored to tears." Falchion sniffed. "I opened two gates yesterday, nothing worth keeping. I'll do a couple more this afternoon. Then we can move, bubble most of the kids, a bunch of furniture and appliances and the computers. All the stuff in the shop too. It's got a nice ambiance."
Eldon wiggled his fingers in an annoying attempt to be ladi da. Fortunately he also had the sense to leave. Probably missing his early morning joggers.
"We'll stop making appointments more than a couple of days out, so no one is alarmed when we disappear. What do the books look like right now?"
Falchion opened the book—a nice faux antique leather bound ledger. "We're already booked solid for the week, and we've got lots the next as well. Not many after that. I'll just stop making appointments now, and start packing the stuff that's not on public display."
Rior looked at his office. "We never have branched out to selling the really strange stuff. Pity, we could have made millions."
"Maybe on the next World. Or, since we got so bored, maybe we ought to just give up and be out-and-out bad guys? Rob banks as half-morphed animals and such."
"That would certainly alleviate the boredom." Rior looked out his office door and through the window. "Now what?"
Lanton walked in. "John James escaped this morning, have you seen him?" There were three uniformed cops on his heels.
"No. I expect he's still stuck in traffic."
"How amusing. Mr. Withy? Have you ever been to Denver?"
"Yes?" He frowned. Had that been the name of the city where they'd robbed all those jewelry stores?
"How did Rex find out about the jewelry?"
The uniformed cops were spreading out as Lanton talked.
"What?" That genuinely floored him for a moment. "Oh? Is this a new theory about why he was killed? I thought James did it?"
"He's also confessed to nineteen other highly publicized murders. Two of which occurred before he was born."
"So you think he didn't kill Rex? But you think he'll come back here? How did he escape?"
"Apparently he claimed he knew an invisibility spell. And then he disappeared from his holding cell at the Courthouse, and no one will admit to leaving the door unlocked and unwatched."
"Do you think he'll come here?" Falchion frowned. "Why? This is the first place the police would look."
"Second, actually. I sent troopers to his altar in the woods, before heading here. Now, where might I find all of your little family group?"
"Home, I suspect, although sometimes they go out for breakfast or grocery shopping."
"And that would be the four homes at 2457 and 2459 Briarwoods Court, and 2456 and 2458 Yaupon Bend Court? Who lives where, exactly?"
"What does that matter?" Rior could feel himself bristling. This common Native was starting to annoy him. And he really didn't like the way one cop was getting around, out of his peripheral vision.
"
I sent a number of family problem specialists to those addresses. Child Protective Services should be joining them shortly."
Falchion went as pale as her tanned complexion would allow. Rior noted that it was fury, not fear and started rolling up spells.
"You think you can threaten my children? That you can take them? Oh, are you going to learn something new today, buster!" She stalked around him, and when the cop grabbed her arm she pulled power out of him and let him stagger away and collapse.
Rior started tossing sleep and paralysis spells and followed her out the door, and threw himself into the passenger seat of the SUV. She floored it leaving the parking lot, dodging cars like they were stationary, and shrieking up to her house in minutes. She slammed on the brakes late, rear-ending a police car and shoving it into the plain car ahead of it.
"Hey, hey, what do you think you're doing?" The uniformed policeman came at a run, one hand reaching for his holster, the other pressing the controls on the radio in his pocket. "All units . . . "
Falchion's gesture threw him through the air and skidding across the lawn. Rior followed it with paralysis, and ran to keep up with the angry witch. People were converging from all directions and he threw his most harmless spells profligately.
"Is everyone here? Falchion, a gate please."
She was hugging her two kids, but quickly snatched a bubble and scooped them into it, and stuck it to her arm. Then she sat down cross-legged.
Jade stalked out. "The nerve of them! You should have just killed them."
"No need to leave a bigger mess behind than we already have. Let's bubble up everything we want to take with us and put the kids in the two suburbans, we'll drive them through."
"Excellent idea." She walked back into the house, calling to the other witches.
Rior stayed near Falchion, not wanting her to be disturbed. A helicopter roared overhead, and he could hear sirens from all directions. He reached out carefully to his widest extent and formed a physical shield, grounded it. Eldon trotted over, and started changing. The sound level dropped abruptly as the wizard raised a muffling spell. The fence crunched as Heso drove across it and the lawn, bubbles stuck all over the SUV. He got out, the baby in his arms, and tossed a pair of jeans at Eldon. "I got all the electronics, and clothes."
Betelgeuse trotted out, and stuck bubbles on the inside of the SUV, moved Heso's so they were inside too. "Even though I suspect it doesn't matter."
Rior staggered a bit when the first police car hit the shield. He could see Epee running from house to car and back. "Heso, would you go bubble my library, and make sure the kids are tucked into one of the vehicles?"
"Sure thing." He glanced worriedly at the circling helicopter as he trotted off.
They ignored the accumulating police vehicles and personnel. Eldon's muffling spell seemed to work well. When men slid down ropes from the helicopter, he waited until they were near the ground before stunning them.
Heso walked back, and added to the bubble collection. "Geeze, you'd think we killed somebody."
"They were asking about Denver and jewelry when they made the mistake of threatening the kids."
Eldon snickered. "Do you mean to tell me that it was your carefully planned raid that caused all this?"
Rior sighed. "Yes. My fault not yours. By the One! I promise I'll never criticize your idiotic behavior until it gets worse than usual."
"I don't think that's possible." Betelgeuse looked around, and started dragging bodies out of the way. Heso started clearing a path for Epee's SUV.
On the outside of the barrier, the police were trying something new.
"Shaped charges. This should be fun." The sounds got a bit noisier as Eldon turned to watch.
Falchion raised her hands and a large foggy circle spread out in front of her. Rior chuckled. "And us without a single non-magical henchperson to look and see what's there."
Betelgeuse trotted over and leaped through. She came right back. "Pine forest, steep slopes, but open enough to get the two cars through. If we don't like it, we can camp there while we look for something else." She trotted to the SUV and started it. Edged forward and into the gate.
Epee leaped into the other and drove it over, edged it carefully through.
"Heso, check and come back."
He popped through, and reappeared immediately. "It's good. Let's get out of here."
"Go ahead. Falchion, can you close it from the other side?"
"Jade has that ready. C'mon." She scrambled up and jumped through. Eldon went next and Rior stepped through on his heels.
Looking back, the glowing whirlpool shrank and spun itself away.
"Well. That was a fun World, while it lasted." Eldon shrugged. "Hope they have fun trying to rationalize everything we just did."
The Sun Never Set On the British Empire
Pam Uphoff
Chapter One
Fall 1399 px
1 October, 2960AD
"The gate's gone!" Ajay realized he sounded hysterical, and tried to get a grip on himself.
Lord Fidel Iron frowned. "An illusion or is it truly gone? Damn Rufi with his gods! I wonder if they will follow it back here?"
"Well, it's six miles away. They can't find us, but they sure can strand us here." Ajay flapped his arms as panic turned into irritation.
His Lordship, of course, gave it some thought and nodded. "Neither of us knows how to open gates, but we can make corridors. We may need to have children, raise some of our own witches and try to train them." He shrugged. "Eventually we can get out, or we can simply live here and get rich, having some unique skills."
"Right." Ajay thought about fast bubbles and nodded. "Right, so it's not so bad. Even if the Guards got them all."
Iron winced at that.
Yeah, your son is there, your darling overambitious lad. You should have joined a few orgies, had a half dozen kids. Ajay hadn't a clue how many children he'd fathered. In fact, with the wine going around, the count was at least a dozen.
Fidel looked around his handsome little house, the tidy fences and horse pastures. Blackstone was a bit of a backwater on the eastern seaboard of North America, not quite far enough from the nearest city to make commuting impossible. A haven for a lot of rich people who didn't need to be in Richmond daily. He'd bought it a year ago, and planned to retire here. And being cut off from most of the gang is actually a good thing. Ajay . . . is not the worst of them. "I didn't plan on company. Do you want the apartment over the barn?"
Ajay nodded reluctantly. "I've got ID for here, bank card and so forth, but I didn't put much money in."
"I'll check the Gang's account, get you some startup funds. Then I'll list you as an employee, transfer money to you as if paying you." Fidel flashed his teeth. "You might even clean a stall, now and then."
Ajay snorted. "Do you have horses here already?"
"I brought one of the yearling colts. I was planning on crossing him with thoroughbred mares to get a good solid jumper. I suppose, being a sailor, you don't ride?"
Ajay shrugged. "I rode as a kid, on the island, and lots recently, since meeting up with your lot."
"Good. You'll fit in with the horsy set around here." The old man smiled. "All the right people ride or own horses. We'll fit right in."
"And that's all you were going to do? For the rest of your life?" Ajay shuddered at the thought of so much boredom.
"No, actually, I've been buying stock, slowly but surely, in the Lunar Redoubt. If we could make a corridor to the Moon, we'd be rich. And that would only be the start. There's all the manned satellites in orbit, possibly even Mars. We won't know until we set them up."
"The Moon. A corridor to the Moon." Ajay boggled a bit. Shook himself. "I'm going to need clothes. Back in a couple of hours."
He walked out to the car. The sleek little red machine was nearly as much fun as a sail boat. Its low cargo capacity was the reason moving Iron's stuff had taken so long, and stranded him here. He drove off, and first checked the all
ey wall—still no gate—and then drove to the Mall.
He put illusions over his own clothing to match the styles here, and just crowd watched for awhile. Checking out what real people wore. And what caught the eyes of the chicks.
Muscles and tattoos, apparently. On the other hand, the richer looking women were looking at the guys that Ajay bet were part of Iron's Horsy Set. Shirts with cuffs and collars, tucked into slacks. Polished leather shoes. All right, he was ready to shop, now. The beauty of magic was that he could easily fit into either set, at will.
He could get a haircut that would fit either set, then illusionary tattoos for one and not the other. Maybe he should even do a bit of face molding for one group. Save himself some grief in the long run. So he loaded up on everything the well-dressed social climber needed, plus enough downer duds to fit in there. He was tempted to just steal it all, but he didn't have the option of dodging down a gate anymore. And this was the nearest mall to 'home'. He handed over his bank card and watched a scrawny girl make a dash out the door. Security was all over her in seconds.
"It's an initiation rite."
He looked around at the clerk. "For what?"
"A local clique, sort of like a Sorority House, but without classes, homework or tuition."
Ajay pressed his thumb to approve his total and accepted his bags. He walked out past the scene of the tearful girl and the looming renta cops, and failed to resist temptation. An illusion of her to cover her, a spell of inattention, a spell of unnoticeability and a Pull, to yank her away from there to where he could unclip the handcuffs with another spell.
"There you go kid. Get around the corner without them noticing and you're home free."
The girl was backing away, her glance running from the renta cops to him and back. "How did you . . . What did you do? They act like they can't see me."
"They can't. Keep your voice down, and lets get around the corner. Oops." One of the cops had tried to touch the girl, and found nothing but air.
Ajay made the illusion give them the finger, and then released it, and hustled the girl around the corner. "Keep walking, get out of the mall quickly." He strode away, done with good deeds for the day.