Heart of a Rebel

by Glenna Maynard

  Parking the car, I get out seeing Foxie hunkered down over something and gagging. Romeo grabs my arm and tries to stop me from seeing what he is trying to hide.

  “Let go of me,” I say jerking from his shaky hold.

  “Baby, leave it. Go to the house with the kids.” He tries to order me but I shove past him and oh my fucking…hell.

  LL is lying in the dirt. It’s dark so I can’t tell but I think she is dead.

  “Is she?” I get choked unable to believe that Romeo would go this far after everything.

  “She is,” Foxie answers my unspoken question trying to keep from getting sick again.

  My stomach drops thinking of her kids and how happy they were to have their mother back. I don’t pretend to like LL but she was their mother. Romeo can’t look me in the face as I look at the man I was prepared to share my life with.

  I take his hand and snap him into action. “Whatever happened you can’t go back. You have to move forward. What are we going to do with her?”

  He looks at me and nods. “I know a place. If you will help me get her in the trunk.”

  I know where he plans to take her. LL will be put to rest next to Slim Black. Skull owns a scrapyard. It isn’t in operation, hasn’t been for years but with needing to get rid of her and the car... That would be the ideal place. Striker once told me that is where they buried his father. Well the man that raised him.

  “Foxie, we need a flashlight and gloves—whatever you can find in the building.” She doesn’t say anything and scrambles to do my bidding.

  Kneeling down next to LL, I run my fingers over her eyelids to close them. The smell of vomit and urine is almost too hard to bear. I take my shirt and bring the collar up over my nose to try to help mask the smell.

  Romeo isn’t speaking. I am afraid he has gone into shock. I’ve never seen him like this. He has been in dark places before, but never one such as this.

  Foxie comes stumbling through the weeds with one pair of gloves and tape. She is sweating profusely. I am concerned she is going to have a heart attack or faint.

  “Give me the gloves,” I say gently taking them from her hands. Someone has to take control here. I cross my heart and say a prayer that I don’t go to prison for this.

  “No, she was my best friend I should do it,” Foxie says shaking her head.

  “Okay, I will go sit with the kids and Lil Bit until you get back.”

  I am relieved to get away from the smell of death and that look masked over Romeo’s face.

  Lil Bit looks at me with wide eyes and I shake my head letting her know I can’t talk right now. She nods and goes back to playing Uno with Dawn and Jamie. Colt and Miracle are sprawled out on a blanket in the floor watching a movie.

  Dawn and Jamie know something is seriously wrong and I don’t know what to say to them. I told them their mom wasn’t feeling well so their dad and Foxie took her to get checked out. We didn’t discuss a plan. I hope I didn’t make a huge mistake but I had to tell them something.

  Foxie

  Romeo is driving LL’s car with her body in the trunk with me following closely behind in Baby’s car. I can believe he killed her but at the same time I can’t. I came pretty close to dying in a similar fashion many times at the hands of my husband Slim Black, God rest his troubled soul.

  Grim stepped in more times than he would have probably liked to keep me from death’s doors. The only reasons I can see for Romeo to commit this act is to protect Baby or his children and with what Baby admitted earlier tonight, I am positive he did it for the sake of the kids.

  We make it to Skull’s old scrapyard. The place has been closed down since he fell ill years ago. Slim tried to buy him out a few times but he wouldn’t ever budge. Maybe I can get Rebel to make the old man see reason before he kicks the bucket and sell out to him. It would make a nice business for Rebel and Lil Bit.

  I know he is hurting now but he will come around and make a life for his family eventually. He’ll have to or I will see to it that he does.

  He’s playing a dangerous game with Baby and they are both going to end up hurt for it. Nothing good will come from them using each other, but I know it is a lesson they need to learn on their own, and I am curious if Baby really means what she said about Striker. I do think had she not gave into her hurt and desire by running off to Romeo…Striker would have got his shit together for her.

  Romeo blinks his brake lights twice signaling me to park. He pulls LL’s vehicle into place for the crusher.

  “Is this where Slim was brought to?” I ask Romeo as I help him get LL loaded onto a cart.

  He scratches the back of his neck. “Do you really want to know what happened to him?”

  “I have a pretty good idea, but yes, if you don’t mind it much. I’d like to know the truth.”

  The boys told me their father was buried in the woods but I knew better than that. I can’t blame them for not telling me. They were afraid I would spill the beans. As much as I loved their father, I hated him too. That man was a selfish bastard who didn’t care who he hurt along the way, as long as he got paid and his dick got sucked.

  We had some good years, Slim and me, but we had plenty of bad to outweigh those times.

  “After the meeting, some of the brothers brought Slim’s body here and put him in the incinerator. And that is what you and I are going to do now with my wife.”

  “Thank you for telling me the truth. I had always wondered when a hunter would run across the body and bring us all down. Good to know Slim can’t hurt anyone else. But LL…did you mean to do it?”

  “No, but once I started I couldn’t stop. Too much bad blood between the two of us. She threatened to take my children away. I’ve lost everything else she wasn’t going to make me lose them too.”

  “You mean you lost Baby,” I say knowing she is what he has lost. “Do you plan to go after her again? Baby I mean. Are you going to really let her go?”

  He ignores me for a moment while he fires up the incinerator. “She never was mine to lose—not really and no I won’t pursue Baby. I told you before I knew I had to end it. LL told me that Miracle isn’t my kid. You know anything about that?”

  “I do. Her father was a man that passed through at the den. Couldn’t tell you his name, but she’s right Miracle isn’t your child. I’m sorry.”

  I remember when LL found out she was pregnant, she was scared out of her mind. She didn’t think her and Romeo could have more children. Said she had tried for a few years and nothing. Then one night she got carried away with a customer and well, then came Miracle.

  “Well doesn’t matter now, I guess,” he says.

  And with that I go wait in Baby’s car while he crushes the car and disposes of one of my dearest friends. I should feel sad about it, but death has become something I am quite used to at this stage in my life. I have experienced enough of it.

  The crunching of metal sends goose pimples over my skin. Smoke rises and I feel as though someone just walked over my grave. I feel as though Slim’s eyes are on me and it gives me the creeps. I think of him from time to time and wonder how he’d be now had Grim not challenged him. Would Striker and Rebel have chosen differently in their lives? I shouldn’t be thinking such thoughts. None of it matters. Things are what they are and my sons have become the men they wanted to be I suppose.

  My trip to California couldn’t have come at a better time. All this talk of death and the past has me ready for a vacation.

  I only hope I am making the right choice in what I am about to do. I have prayed long and hard on it and I keep coming to the same conclusion…I will do anything for my children and for the man I have always loved.

  14

  Sunshine

  It’s strange and yet comforting how Paul and I have not known each other for almost twenty years, but we have reunited in a way that makes me feel as though we haven’t missed a minute. Things are moving fast on his property. The foundation for the house is under construction.


  The contractor is coming by later today to go over the blueprints with Paul and me together. I told Paul to build what he wants, but he says he wants to give me my dream home. After our talk last week, he took me out on a proper date. It was our first and only.

  When we dated as teens, we only met up at the barn and under the tress of my Aunt Jane’s farm. He took me to his sister’s bakery, where he fed me the most delicious cheesecake I have ever tasted. From there we came back to the farm for a horse ride over the property.

  When we arrived at the spot where he first kissed me, Paul got down on one knee and he said to me, “Sunshine, would you do me the honor of lighting up my life with your smile for the rest of my days.”

  I threw my arms around his neck and didn’t hesitate to say yes. The musk of his cologne filtered through my body making my blood hum. We kissed and oh God did he kiss me.

  He made me go weak in the knees, just like in the movies. His kisses are better than I remembered.

  I smile as the memory plays on my lips as I gaze down at the ring on my finger. Paul bought me a beautiful infinity band. It’s simple but so elegant.

  His strong arms wrap around me as he plants feather light kisses on my neck. I giggle feeling like a schoolgirl, waiting any moment for Jane to walk in and catch us messing around.

  Only it isn’t Jane that walks in its Patrick. My heart flutters. This is the third time I have seen him and it isn’t any less shocking. I haven’t spent much time around him. He has said only a few words of congratulations to me.

  Seeing him is hard, and not knowing what to say to him is even harder. Paul tells me just to act natural. Easier for him to say since he has had years to work through it all. I’ve had a week.

  Patrick blushes when I smile at him. He shuffles awkwardly on his feet. “Morning Ma’am.”

  “Patrick please call me Sunshine, I’m not old enough to be a Ma’am.” He nods with a flirty grin. Oh yeah, he has Paul’s charm. “You boys ready to work. Jane said the chickens got out sometime during the night and she is afraid that nasty little fox has gotten a hold of them.”

  Paul kisses my cheek softly and I watch the two of them as they go out the door. How did I get so lucky? Life has given me a second chance and I intend to make every moment count. I am falling hard and fast for him all over again.

  Paul has different plans though. That man is moving at a snail’s pace when it comes to the physical. He hasn’t tried to sleep with me and when I brought the subject up he said it was because he wanted to do things right this time. I thought his reservations were silly but sweet.

  I respect his decision but if he don’t touch me soon I might die. I think I need to take things into my own hands.

  When Paul comes back in for lunch, I leave a note for him on the counter to meet me in my room. I hope that the only thing he will want to eat is me.

  Wearing nothing but my panties I lie on the bed waiting for him in what I hope is a seductive pose. I would think with my former job that being with a man wouldn’t make me nervous but Paul makes me feel young again.

  A light knock taps on my door.

  “Come in,” I purr.

  The door opens and a dark head peers in only to slam the door back quickly. Oh my God! That wasn’t Paul, it was Patrick—my son, only he doesn’t know that. Thank the Lord he shut the door without gawking at me.

  Jumping up from the bed, I throw on a sundress. I can’t face him ever again, I’m so embarrassed. It’s one thing to see his Uncle’s girlfriend nude, thank goodness he doesn’t know I am his mother, he would have a complex for life.

  I am staring out my window trying to gather the courage to show my face when Paul comes to my door to tell me the contractor is here early.

  “Go ahead without me, I’m not feeling well,” I say tensely.

  Paul lets himself in. “This wouldn’t have anything to do with the fact that you flashed Patrick would it? I’ve never seen that boys face so beet red.” He chuckles and kisses my temple. His rough hands run down my arms. “It’s not that bad.”

  “The hell it isn’t,” I say defensive.

  “Come on, we have a life to plan.”

  Reluctantly I take a deep breath and allow him to lead me to the kitchen.

  Paul pauses outside my door in the hall. His fingers stretch until he reaches the panty line that curves around my ass cheeks. “You can show me these later and tell me just what it was you thought you were serving me for lunch.”

  Swatting his hand away I say, “That depends on how hungry you are.”

  My hips swing as we make our way to the kitchen and I hope Patrick has gone back outside to work.

  “I’m famished,” Paul says threatening, just as I step into the kitchen.

  Baby

  The past week has been a blur. By the time Foxie and Romeo came back with my car all the kids had fallen asleep and Lil Bit and I were more than ready to go home.

  Lil Bit doesn’t know what we were doing, but she knows enough to know that it wasn’t anything good, and to keep her mouth shut.

  One thought keeps crossing my mind…that could have been me. I don’t believe for a second that Romeo knew he was going to kill LL. I know his temper got the best of him; I have been on the receiving end of it before. My hands rub my throat remembering him choking me only a few weeks ago.

  I’m sick of men thinking they own me. Striker treated me like his property and Romeo treated me like a dirty fuck. I suppose the apple doesn’t fall far from the tree. Striker took after Romeo a lot more than I could have ever imagined. I wonder if Striker knew about Romeo being his father when he passed away. In a way, I hope he did know because that would mean that maybe just maybe he heard me when I said I was sorry for all of it.

  I don’t know why I keep doing this to myself…wondering about things that are out of my control. The lack of control in my life is driving me insane. I have been on edge all day wondering how Colt’s day has been.

  My phone chimes with a FaceTime from Foxie. She and Colt left two days ago for California. She has been calling me twice daily and also doing a nightly video call so I can tell Colt goodnight.

  “Hi baby!” I greet my little man. His cheeks are slightly sunburnt and his freckles are showing.

  “Mom, mom,” he says warming my heart. I miss him so much. Life without him is so damn lonely.

  “Are you having a good time?”

  “Go daddy, go daddy,” he says repeating it again.

  “Foxie why does he keep saying that?” I ask.

  “We saw a group of motorcycles parked by the hotel earlier. Must have made him think of Striker,” she says blowing it off. I guess she is right. It isn’t odd that he would ask for his father.

  Stupid fucking Rebel, this is all his fucking fault!

  Grim

  “We have arranged for you to have dinner with him. We will bring him shortly.”

  “He’s here?”

  “Yes, he is in the next room. He is in good health for just having his third stoke. The others will arrive sometime over the next week and then we can part ways.”

  A knock sounds on the door and a wheelchair is pushed into the room.

  “Longtime no see,” he says looking thin.

  “You sure this is what you want?”

  “I am old, I’ve lived my life. I don’t have anything to lose. You still have the club to support and a family to care for,” Skull says breathing hard, and putting his oxygen tube back in his nostrils.

  The two of us eat in silence. He’s made his decision and I respect his choice. We look over the documents one more time with Stokes.

  “Everything looks good. I have everyone in place on our end.”

  “Will I get to see them before it is final?” I ask the suits.

  “We will see what we can arrange. Once they all arrive safely things will move quickly.”

  “I’ll go free?”

  “As long as you hold up your end of the bargain and the information proves resourceful. You�
��ll have your life back and your family will be safe.”

  I nod and sign my name on the affidativ. This has to work.

  15

  Rebel

  Baby flings the door to my room open. She looks full of hate and despair. “I hate you,” she seethes.

  “I fucking hate you too!” I spit back. I get up off the bed and cross the room to kick her out but something else soon takes over; I don’t know what it is. Is it the combination of all of my emotions and hers?

  Instead of throwing her out, I shut the door behind her and seize her mouth. Shoving her against the door hard looking in her honey whiskey eyes. She smacks me hard drawing blood from my lip. I smack her back and laugh. She puts her hand to her cheek with tears stinging her eyes.

  She shoves hard against my chest and I press my knee between her legs pinning her in place. She spits in my face. “I just want to forget¸” she whispers. “Why does it hurt so bad? I can’t forgive you and I can’t forget them.”

  “You know,” I grit in her ear. “I keep asking myself had I gave into you when you wanted me all those years ago, would things have been different? I think Striker and Sarah could have ended up together and Colt would be mine.”

  She looks away not meeting my eyes and I know she has wondered the same, she has asked herself the same question. I grab her mouth, press my bloodied lips to hers, and kiss her hard. She fights it at first but soon gives in. Her mouth parts and her tongue connects with mine. Fire consumes me, and for this moment, I can’t think of anything else but her. The pain has vanished from my mind and I think she is a hell I’d burn forever for.

  “Is this what you want?” She is asking me point blank. I grind my hips into hers letting her feel the firmness growing in my boxer briefs. Her arms go around my neck and I walk backwards bringing her with me as I kiss her and tear at her clothes.

  “Yes,” I answer raggedly unable to breathe yet unable to stop the train wreck collision course we are on.