If he had started choking at dinner, he would have waved off the Heimlich.
His mother might marry for love, but she never divorced without taking her ex for all he had. If this arrangement didn’t work out for either of them, he’d take only what he brought with him. Nothing more.
More importantly, he’d never find himself in this situation ever again.
He’d been here too often with his mother’s husbands. Each breakup left him feeling as if he wasn’t good enough or worthy enough to find a man who would actually care about him and stay. His father certainly never did. He’d taken off the day of Cody’s birth and never looked back.
It was painful enough after all those men. After his own breakup with Phillip—well, he almost didn’t make it back from that one.
“I’ve never seen a sadder smile on someone in my life.”
Cody whipped around to find Julian leaning against the wall in the living room, staring at him. He’d traded the suit he’d been wearing on the plane for a pair of dark denim jeans and a button-down shirt. Damn. Even dressed in casual attire, he still looked like a million bucks.
Cody blew the air from his lungs and contorted his face. “What? Are you stalking me now?”
“Can’t a man stalk his husband in his own house?”
“Of course he can,” Cody answered with a single nod. “So what did Adria want?”
Julian studied him in silence for a few moments, clearly wanting to ask what Cody had been thinking about but wisely deciding to let it go. Cody really didn’t want to travel down that road any more today. “She was just reminding me of the fundraiser in a few weeks and some other trips I’d like to go over with you.”
Cody plopped down on the couch, propped his feet on the oversize, super plush ottoman, and beckoned Julian forward. “You may address me.”
“Why thank you, Your Majesty.” Julian fell into the seat next to him. “But there’s something I need to do first.”
Cody stretched back on the sofa, burying himself in the delightful cushion that enveloped his body. “What’s that?”
Before he had a chance to react, Julian snuggled next to him, wrapping his arm around Cody’s bicep and nuzzling into the crook of his neck.
“What are you doing?”
“Just smelling you,” he answered after a deep inhale. “Getting the full husband experience. It’s not every day I come home married, you know?”
Cody peered down at Julian’s grinning face. God, he wanted to mount those lips more than anything right now. “Yeah, well, just don’t get handsy. No sex, remember?”
“I do, but we do have a PG-13 agreement.”
“So you want me to flash you. Is that it?” Cody grumbled before reaching for the buttons of his jeans.
Julian’s hand on his stopped him cold. “No. That’s not it at all.”
“Then what?”
Julian slid across his lap, straddling him. As soon as his ass rested against his groin, Cody tensed and the Incredible Bulk roared to life. He had to stop this now. “Julian—”
“Relax.” He caressed Cody’s cheeks and along his jaw. He traced a slow, burning path around his quivering lips and into the dimple on his chin. With each stroke and each flutter of his finger, Julian released the clasps of control that held Cody in check. “All I want is a welcome-home kiss.”
If he’d had the strength, Cody would have pleaded for Julian not to do this. This wasn’t a good idea. They were crossing the line from PG-13 into R. But all Cody could focus on was Julian’s lips inching ever closer to his, the heated sweep of Julian’s breath as it fanned across his sizzling flesh, and the low moan that escaped from the depths of Cody’s throat.
The moment Julian rubbed his lips against Cody’s, breathing his coaxing, pleading, sensuous gasps into the kiss, his illusion of control shattered.
Even more terrifying, Cody actually hoped that maybe, just maybe, this one wouldn’t leave after all.
Chapter Ten
JULIAN pulled into the driveway of his house and sighed. Although he loved coming home to Cody and his big, handsome smile, he was growing weary of the distance between them. Cody was still the same goofball he’d met in Vegas, but something had changed.
It was like he was waiting for the other shoe to drop, but why?
Even though they’d traveled a lot recently, he’d gone out of his way to spend time with Cody. He made it his top priority. Nothing else came close. He still gave his campaign and political duties 100 percent, but he devoted just as much energy, if not more, to proving to Cody that the two of them could really do this.
But ever since Austin, he couldn’t pull Cody out of whatever funk he’d fallen into. At first Julian had chalked it up to the move. Maybe Cody was having difficulty adjusting to his new life. That was why Julian went out of his way to make their home life perfect and did whatever he could to ease the burden of their many out-of-town jaunts.
But no matter what he tried, he couldn’t get Cody back to the carefree man he’d met.
Something was clearly wrong, but every time he brought it up, Cody changed the subject to topics like taxes, health insurance, or separate bank accounts.
Why did Julian have the feeling he was being tested and failing miserably?
He got out of the car and took a deep breath. No matter what new trial Cody had cooked up for him today, he planned on conquering it the way he overcame every obstacle. What choice did he have? He was committed to this marriage, and he had faith they’d get through whatever this was.
When he walked through the front door, he expected to be greeted with the smell of charred food and pungent smoke. It was Cody’s night to cook, after all, and the last time he’d made dinner, he’d almost burned the house down trying to make chateaubriand.
“What the hell?” Julian had said, charging into the kitchen. He’d taken the flaming meat out of the oven, dumped it into the sink, and turned on the faucet. “Are you okay?”
Cody had crossed his arms over his chest and glared at him. “I told you I wasn’t a good cook.”
“Yes, you did.” He strolled over to the refrigerator and pulled out some ground beef. “No worries. I can whip up some spaghetti real quick.”
“But it’s my night to cook.” Cody’s words had come out sharp, as though he was itching for a fight.
Julian had no intention of humoring him. He battled politicians all day at work. “Well, you’ll do better next time.”
Cody scrunched up his lips and huffed before grabbing a pot from under the sink.
That was the scene Julian expected to walk into. Instead, he found only an empty kitchen and a silent house. When he entered the living room, Cody wasn’t deep in thought, typing away at his keyboard and completely oblivious to the time.
Julian pulled his phone out of his pocket to check for a message. There were none. He didn’t expect Cody to wait on him hand and foot. Things came up, and duties sometimes had to be shifted around. That was the draw of their relationship. Their arrangement allowed their lives to be more fluid than most traditional marriages, where sharply drawn lines of responsibilities often created resentment and hurt feelings.
They didn’t have to worry about pesky emotions.
Still, coming home to an empty house and not Cody’s warm hug disturbed him. He’d grown accustomed to their routine, and tendrils of loneliness wrapped around his chest and squeezed. He’d certainly never expected that.
A thump from upstairs drew Julian’s attention.
“Cody?”
He climbed the stairs. The second floor was dark except for the sliver of light shining under the bedroom door. He immediately released the breath he hadn’t realized he’d been holding.
Julian cracked open the door to find Cody staring into the glare of his laptop, wearing only his earbuds and the gym shorts he’d worn to bed. One leg dangled off the bed and thumped on the floor. The mess of tangled reddish-blond hair told Julian his husband had obviously not made it out of bed after he’d l
eft the house this morning. Inspiration for his new novel had clearly struck.
That made Julian smile, but not as much as seeing Cody bob his head to the beat as his fingers flew across the keyboard. Damn, he was one sexy man, and if Julian hadn’t agreed to their irritating PG-13 trial period, he would be flying across the room and pouncing on that fine body.
Dammit. A cold shower was in his immediate future.
“Julian?”
Cody’s loud voice made him jump.
“Sorry.” Cody pulled the earbuds free and glanced at his watch. “I guess I lost track of time.”
Julian waved off the comment. “I take it your muse is working again.”
“Oh yeah. I’ve been on a writing streak.”
Cody had been having trouble getting inside his characters’ heads ever since he set foot in San Diego. Maybe that explained his mood the past three months. “Great.” Julian plopped down on the mattress.
“It is?” Why did Cody sound so surprised? “But I haven’t even started dinner, and I know you’re hungry.”
“So what? We can go out to eat.”
“I haven’t even showered today.” He lifted his underarm and sniffed his pit. “I reek.”
Julian inhaled the scent of sweat and musk that filled the room. It smelled like heaven to him. “I can order takeout, then.”
Cody narrowed his eyes. “That happens to me a lot. I often forget everything else in the world when I’m writing. It tends to piss people off.”
“I’m not most people.”
A grin slowly stretched across Cody’s lips, but before it could grow into a full smile, he shook his head and cleared his expression.
AFTER Julian left Cody to order dinner, Cody found it impossible to write. How the hell could Julian be so damn understanding all the time? It was like there was nothing Cody could do or say that would set him off and get him to be anything less than the perfect husband.
It was aggravating as hell.
He thought he’d nipped this perfection shit in the bud back in Vegas. Clearly he’d been mistaken. After all, he’d been doing everything he could think of to rile Julian up. He challenged Julian’s thoughts on holiday vacations, on child-rearing, on any subject most married people bickered over, but Julian always found some irritating way to rationally solve conflicts, like when they had discussed politics the other night.
“I don’t vote,” Cody had admitted.
Julian’s wide-open mouth had told Cody he’d definitely struck a nerve. He was finally going to see the real Julian. “Are you kidding me?”
He had smugly shaken his head, waiting for the fireworks.
“Why not?”
“What good does it do? My one vote will never affect any kind of change. The political system is broken. It isn’t run by the people or for the people. The 1 percent and big business rule our country.”
“But that’s where you’re wrong. If all the people who didn’t vote actually made their voices heard by casting their ballots, do you realize the change that could sweep through this country?”
“The wealthy politicians would just make grandiose promises they never intend to keep. What the average American thinks doesn’t really matter. What matters is getting elected. You’re an excellent example of that.”
Julian had flinched. “What does that mean?”
“The only reason we’re still married is because you don’t want to ruin your reelection.”
“That’s where you’re wrong.” Instead of getting offended or angry, he had only smiled. “Do I want to get reelected? Sure. But that’s not why we’re still married. We’re married because our views on life make us a great fit for each other. If I was truly only interested in getting reelected, I would have let you go through with Adria’s plan, but I didn’t. I don’t want to get reelected that way because that’s not the kind of political figure I want to be. I want to be the kind of man people respect, the kind of man the people will vote for because they know I will be their voice, the kind of man that might even make you pull the lever for democracy. So you may not vote now—that’s your right as an American—but I have faith that being my husband just might change your mind.”
That had been how Julian had ended the conversation. There had been no screaming. Yelling had been the way his mother and her husbands had approached every single disagreement.
What did Cody have to do to cause one tiny break in the mask of perfection Julian constantly wore? Whatever it was, Cody had devoted himself to finding that one weakness, that one straw that would break the camel’s back, because there was no way someone was as perfect as Julian pretended to be.
Whenever something seemed too good to be true, it usually was.
WHEN the doorbell rang, Julian called upstairs for Cody before heading toward the front door. He was starving, and the Chinese takeout he’d ordered would definitely hit the spot. When he flung open the door, his growling stomach grew quiet and he forgot how to breathe.
His mother stood on the porch, wearing a movie star’s formfitting black dress. He hadn’t seen her decked out in her best in years. Since his father’s roving eye typically never noticed her, Victoria Canales rarely glammed up, but here she was throwing her hands around his neck and embracing him, wearing a smile that dazzled almost as much as the string of diamonds around her neck.
“Oh, Julian! It’s so good to see you.”
Why did she make it sound as if it had been years since they last saw each other? Julian stepped out of the embrace and gaped at her. “Mom? Are you okay?”
She gestured at her thin body and placed one confident hand on her jutting hip. “Do I not look okay?”
Before Julian could answer, Cody bounded down the stairs, fully dressed and clearly ready to get his eat on too. “What did you o—?” When he saw a well-dressed woman instead of a delivery guy, he joined Julian at the door. “Who’s this?”
“You!” His mother squeaked while giving Cody a once-over. “You’re very handsome. I can see why my son was so taken with you that he just had to marry you on the spot.”
Cody glanced back and forth between Julian and his mother. “S-son? Are you…?”
“Victoria Canales.” She held out her hand for Cody. “Julian’s mother.”
Instead of shaking her hand, Cody gave her a big hug. Julian winced, waiting for his mother to protest or tell him not to manhandle her. She had never been fond of anyone touching her. But instead of getting upset, she returned Cody’s embrace.
Julian couldn’t close his gaping mouth. “Who are you? What have you done to my mother?”
She giggled like a schoolgirl as Cody escorted her to the living room. “So much has changed. But you wouldn’t know that since you don’t answer your mother’s calls.”
He loved his mother, but he had to separate himself from her and the pain she wallowed in. After every affair his father had, Julian was the shoulder she had always leaned on. He constantly advised her to leave him, to start again, but she could never bring herself to do it. Her answer had always been the same. “I love him, Julian. He’s my husband.” As if that justified his cheating and her refusal to take a stand.
His soul shattered every time his mother’s heart was broken. If he hadn’t distanced himself, he would have lost his mind.
“I’ve been real busy,” he finally muttered as his mother sat on the couch next to Cody.
“So I see.” She gestured to Cody. His big, goofy grin spread across his features. Cody had been bringing up meeting Julian’s family for months, but every time he broached the subject, Julian had distracted him with a new fundraiser or a campaign trip they had to take.
He hadn’t wanted to subject Cody to his family. He had more important things to do, like a marriage to sustain and an election to win. He’d put so much energy into both that according to Adria, the voters had noticed. Since he’d married Cody, Adria commented that his public appearances had been more relaxed, more natural, as if the giant stick in his ass had finally been
pulled out. Voters were responding, based on the latest estimates.
Chances were more than favorable that when Californians finally did cast their ballots in a few weeks, Julian would keep his Senate seat.
Now, though, all that progress might have been in vain.
“What’s going on?”
His mother stared blankly at him. “What do you mean?”
“What do you mean ‘what do you mean?’ It’s not like you to just drop by.”
She nodded. “It’s not just me.”
Julian glanced over his shoulder as if a serial killer waited in the wings. “Who the hell else is coming over?”
“Your sister.”
What? His sister hadn’t spoken to him in longer than he could remember. “Why?”
The front door slammed shut and his sister’s voice echoed down the hall. “I’m here.”
Julian fought the urge to run and hide. Her arrival usually meant his torment was about to begin. But when Martha entered the room wearing jeans and a casual blouse, Julian almost fell over. His sister wore tailored suits to work and usually had her cell phone glued to her ear, and—was that a smile on her face?
“Well, well, if it isn’t the prodigal son.” Her dark gaze that had always reminded Julian of a tar pit had softened. Then she did something she’d never done before. She crossed the room and hugged him.
Julian extricated himself from her limbs and stood back. “Someone better tell me what the hell is going on.”
“Julian!” his mother chided while his sister cocked her head to one side as if she had no clue they had suddenly gone bananas.
Cody flew to his side, grasping his cheeks with his warm hands and forcing Julian’s gaze to him. “Calm down.”
His caresses had their desired effect. Julian’s rapidly beating heart slowed, but his desire to find out what was happening right now did not.
“You don’t understand.” The strength he was able to draw from Cody was amazing. “This,” he said, gesturing at his sister and his mother, “isn’t my family. I don’t know who they are.”
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