Against All Odds

by Alexia Vella Deguara

  “Why would he be stupid?” He asked crossing his arms on his chest.

  “Because he can't make up his mind. He never expresses his feelings. How can Lorraine know if he loves her if he never says so? He's a coward who doesn't want to take position,” I said. “And I'm sure that this is because he doesn't love her,” I continued trying to keep calm although it was difficult and my voice had sounded uneven.

  He gazed at me with his beautiful blue eyes.

  “How do you know that?” He replied calmly.

  “If he loved her he would risk everything for her,even his job,” I replied knowing he was understanding what I was saying.

  “Is being a priest considered a job? Isn't it more like a lifestyle?” asked Grace again. Mr Spencer ignored her, he was still looking at me.

  “He's a coward, he hides and she's fed up waiting,” I continued.

  “She knew he was a priest the first time she lay eyes on him and yet she continued,” he retorted.

  “Well she knows what she wants, it's the priest that is rather confused. She's risking as well you know, people won't take this lightly if they were to be caught. People would talk about her, maybe make her life miserable but she wants him,” I said feeling a lump in my throat.

  “She can't have him, he's her priest dammit!Can't she understand this?” He said angrily.

  “Her priest?” Asked Grace with her mouth open.

  “True love has no boundaries,if he loves her he'll do everything to be with her. Isn't the book called Against all odds? Well he should fight against everyone and everything if he wants to be with her,” I said my voice broken.

  He stared at me. It was really hard for me not to cry but I couldn't break down in front the whole class.

  “OK Cassy that's enough,you made your point,you can go back to your place now.”He said getting up.

  “Sir?!” Grace called him.

  “Yes Grace.”

  “Can I give my view about the story too,” she asked.

  “Sure the class is all yours,” he said.

  I went to sit down. Lucy looked at me worried.

  “Cas,what was that all about? You weren't talking about Lorraine and Jason were you?”she asked.

  “No we were talking about us, hope no one else understood.”

  “Cassidy,” I looked up in Grace's direction. I wondered what she wanted.

  “What?” I asked.

  “You didn't read all the book yet did you?” She asked me.

  “No, why?”

  "Well probably you would change your opinion about Father Jason if you do as in the end he-.”

  "I don't want to know. I will know when I have reached the end of it,” I said interrupting her.

  “Only fair,” she replied and then she continued to talk about the book. I remained quiet until the end of the lesson.

  CHAPTER 22

  When the bell rang. I grabbed my things and went out without even waiting for Lucy. I was in a hurry.

  “Cas wait, can we meet later in the canteen?” Lucy shouted after me when I was already at the door.

  “Yes sure. I have to go now,” I said waving at her. I wanted to arrive before him. When I arrived in the classroom he was not there yet. I put my bag down and went to sit at his desk waiting for him to arrive. After a few minutes he was there. When he opened the door he stopped and stared at me surprised. Then he closed the door and began to walk towards me.

  “What are you doing at my desk?” He asked sharply, he was still angry.

  “I thought you enjoyed humiliating me. You wanted me to be the teacher and now here I am,” I said sarcastically.

  “I didn't want to humiliate you,” he said putting his briefcase down.

  “No?! What was the scene of before huh? And that bad mark? What's wrong with you Mr Spencer?You only treat me nicely when we're alone?” I shouted challenging him.

  “Lower your voice if you don't want the whole school to know what you're saying,” he said as he stopped just in front of me. He put his strong hands on the desk and glared down in my eyes.

  “Now can you get up and go to your place!” He ordered.

  “No!I won't move from here until you tell me what the hell is wrong with you? I didn't deserve that treatment in class. You're angry with me and I want to know why.”I said with a steady voice.

  “What's wrong with me? Let me tell you what's wrong with me. You... you're a stupid little girl. You're a masochist,that's what's wrong with me. How can you return to that fucking bastard after all the things he did to you?!”

  Now he was the one who was shouting.

  “I didn't go back to him,” I retorted, he

  had gotten all wrong.

  “I saw you with my eyes hugging passionately in the corner. My God I never thought you were that stupid, not after all that happened.”

  “I can't take this anymore!” I shouted trying to hold back the tears.

  “You can't just come into my life like this, telling me what to do. You're my teacher and you're not acting like one,” I cried.

  He looked at me in disbelief.

  “I'm only concerned. I'm sorry."

  “No,this is not concern. This is jealousy,you're just jealous!!” I shouted.

  For a moment I thought I had exaggerated. I saw fear in his eyes. I waited for him to shout at me, to say something in his defense but what he said nearly made me lose my balance..

  “Maybe I am.”

  My jaw dropped. Was he admitting?

  “What this suppose to mean Sir?" I asked my eyes fixed on him.

  “Nothing. He moved back from me and turned around,his back towards me, then I saw him going near the door. He stopped just in front of it.“Cassidy,it's better if we don't do the lesson today. I have to go,” he said as he put his hand on the door knob.

  “No!!! Wait!”

  I ran to reach him before he opened the door,blocking it with my hand.

  “I won't let you. not now,” I said.

  “What do you want from me Casy?” He asked weakly.

  He seemed devastated. He looked worried and I swear he was shaking.

  “Just the truth? Please look at me,” I begged.

  He turned around and I was just in front of him.....

  “Do you feel something for me,do you love me?” I asked weakly.

  He looked at me defeated.

  “I.. I can't respond. Please Cassy,you're making everything so difficult for me. I just can't.”

  “OK then, there is only one way to know," I said as an idea came to mind. "Stay still. I want just to check something. I'm sure about it but I have to have a confirmation.”

  “What are you talking about ?” he asked.

  “You already know but I know I'll never get you to admit it so I have to do this.”

  “Do What?”

  I didn't respond instead I lifted my hand and touched his neck. He grabbed my hands in shock.

  “What are you doing?”

  “I just want to touch your face."

  “Why?”

  “I need to know. I've lost enough sleep because of this. Let me touch your face please,” I begged.

  “No. Cassidy what the hell? I'm your teacher. I'm.."

  “No. You're not just my teacher. You never were just a teacher and we both know this. Listen I have taken a decision,if I'm wrong about you then I will quit art.”

  “What? Why? You're good,” he said in a sad voice.

  “Please,don't you understand that I can't stand this situation anymore,being here alone with you.”

  “Because of today? I said I'm sorry.... I-"

  I put a finger to his lips stopping him.

  “Just shut up will you? No,not because of today; because of everything that happened between us. Because of yesterday. Because I need to know."

  He looked at me in a strange way but didn't say anything else, instead he let go of my hands and leaned against the door in surrender. I closed my eyes and lifted my hands. I was shaking so much th
at I thought I was going to faint. I touched his jaw first, then I traced his lips, his nose and eyes and eyebrows and finally I've put my hand behind his neck to touch his hair which came down to his neck. I felt tears filling my eyes which rolled down my cheeks and as soon as I opened my eyes he was looking at me in silence. I couldn't read through his eyes though.

  “I knew it. I knew I wasn't wrong,” I said in a whisper.

  “What are you talking about Casy? What are you trying to prove?” he asked weakly.

  “Can't you stop pretending? You know darn well what I' m talking about. I know your secret. I know it was you, you're Chris.”

  I felt his body tremble and then tense. He looked defeated,lost.

  “Cas. I don't...."

  But I didn't give him time to say anything as I pulled him to me and covered his mouth with mine. He was rigid at first and I feared he would reject me but then I felt his hands on my back. I felt him forcing my mouth open. His hands ran down my back until they found my bottom. He lifted me up and put me on a desk near by and kissed me with so much passion that I thought I was going to die out of breath. It was the same type of kiss. I had found my prince. I was so happy. I couldn't believe it, he was mine finally. He gently broke the kiss and pulled back looking me in terror...

  “I'm sorry...Cas.... I...!”

  “Well I'm not. Don't pull back again OK. I

  won't let you. I don't want you to," I said steadily.

  “Are you sure? You know in what trouble you will be if this comes out? I shouldn't have let you do this.. I-" He paused and made a few paces backwards putting space between us. His hands rose nervously up and combed his hair.

  “Ty, I want to hear it from you, was it you that night?”I asked.

  “Why are you asking if you already know the answer.”

  I went close to him again and grabbed his arm.

  “ Sir do you love me? Please answer me". I begged. He looked deep into my eyes.

  “Yes Cassy! he said. My heart missed a beat. "I'm in love with you and I just can't keep it inside anymore," he said softly.

  My eyes filled with tears. My stomach ached. Oh my God. I was dreaming. I didn't want to wake up if this was the case.

  “Oh Ty."

  “Listen Casy. I want you to be sure ,sure about what your doing. I'm older than you

  and-"

  “I don't care. I just want to be with you,” I said happily squeezing his arm.

  “Do you? I thought you loved Julian. Wasn't that why you broke my kiss that night?”

  I shook my head.“Julian? I never mentioned him. I just told you that I loved someone else. I love my English teacher. I couldn't tell you that could I? You were a complete stranger at that time,although deep down my heart knew it was you. Ty I always loved you and this morning I left Julian."

  He looked at me stunned and then a sweet smile curved his beautiful lips.

  “You did?Oh,what an idiot I have been!”

  “It doesn't matter, will you risk for me? Against all odds?” I asked.

  He pulled me in his arms and then lifted my chin with his hand so that I could look at him..

  “I will, we'll risk it together. It won't be easy but we'll try OK.”

  I nodded and he took my lips with desperation. He pushed me against the door. This kiss was even better then the first one. He tasted me slowly , stroking the interior of my mouth with such sensuality that I thought I was going to die in his arms. His hand slipped behind my head while he pressed himself against my body. I could feel all his excitement and all his desire,he wanted me. I knew that. He wanted all of me. Shame we were at school. But then he pulled back breathless.

  “I'm sorry. I lost control,” he apologized.

  I smiled.

  “I love you,” I repeated.

  “I love you too," he answered smiling while he arranged his tie and his hair. Then he looked at me and....

  “Do you think it's possible to start the lesson? We're here for that no?” He said although I knew he didn't feel like doing a lesson.

  "OK Sir but I'll have to inform you that my concentration level at the moment stands at zero,” I said playfully.

  He smiled.“Well you have to get used to this situation Cassy, especially during English. This has to be kept a secret OK. No one shall know.”

  “Not even Lucy?” I said raising my eyebrows.

  “I prefer not, although I know you'll tell her just the same.”

  “She'll never betray me. I can assure you that,” I said trying to reassure him.

  “OK. If you trust her with your life then only her OK.”

  “Yes Sir".

  “Cas, our relationship won't be normal. I mean there will be many things that other couples do which we can't ,like dating,going out together. Will our love be strong enough?” He asked as he went to sit down.

  “As long as I'm with you I don't care about anything,although I know it won't be easy to meet especially after school."

  “Leave it to me. I will find a way. Now let's try to do some Art OK?”

  CHAPTER 23

  The bell rang. I looked at Tyler with pleading eyes. He smiled.

  “No Cas,I won't keep you in detention. I can't stay with you during the break. Mr Daniels wants to discuss something with me,so my answer is no,” he said teasingly.

  I was disappointed.

  “An hour a day is not enough”.I grumbled.

  “Already complaining?We have just started”. He said caressing my face.“Listen I'll find a way to be with you I promise but not in here during school hours. We have to be careful Cas OK?”

  “OK,” I answered looking at him sadly.

  Then I threw everything in my bag and looked at him.

  “I'm going Sir,hope to see you soon.”I said as I began to walk towards the door. I had already arrived when he came behind me and grabbed my waist and turned me to face him and then kissed me.

  “That's going to be very soon," he whispered.

  I look at him quizzically. Did he have something in mind? I left the art room in a state of dizziness, not yet believing that this was actually happening. I was on cloud nine. I would have danced and sang in the corridor if I didn't see Mr Daniels approaching.

  "Good morning Mr Daniels,” I said in a happy tone.

  He looked at me and smiled..

  “Good morning Cassidy, you're in a good mood this morning.”

  “Yes I am," I admitted.

  “Is Mr Spencer still in the Art class room by any chance?” He asked.

  “I don't know, maybe, he was still there when I left,” I replied.

  “OK thanks. Good day,” he said and then left.

  Tyler was right I thought . It was a good job he didn't accept to give me a detention. What would Mr Daniels have thought if he had found me there again during break? I arrived at the canteen hoping to find Lucy although I wasn't going to tell her anything, at least not in school. She wasn't there anyway. So I ate my lunch and relaxed a little bit and then headed to the Lecture Block for my next lesson. It was then that I saw Lucy. She was in the corridor searching for something in her bag.