Justine Elyot

by Secretsand Lords

  He kissed her head.

  ‘You didn’t like that?’

  ‘No, I mean, I did, but … that’s not it.’ She looked down at her dripping thighs.

  ‘Ah.’ He fell to his knees and lay down on the grass, one hand over his face.

  Edie, irritated by his lack of response, went to the edge of the lake and dipped her handkerchief in the water. She was dabbing at the mess when he sat up, corrected his dress and spoke.

  ‘Would it matter so much?’ he said.

  She turned, outraged.

  ‘Would it matter? No, not to you, I daresay. But it would ruin my life, if that means anything at all to you.’

  ‘I’d marry you like a shot.’

  She turned away from him and continued her frantic efforts to remove all evidence of him from her.

  ‘Charles,’ she said levelly, unable to face him. ‘Did you do that deliberately?’

  ‘No, of course not. I was carried away in the moment just as you were. All I’m saying is that it needn’t be the end of the world if you … if it led to something.’

  ‘But how could it?’ she said, wiping the last traces and dipping her handkerchief back in the tepid waters. ‘Charles, how can we ever …? Oh, why did I come here? It’s the worst mistake of my life. Several of the worst mistakes, in fact, all at once.’

  ‘Well, if that’s how you feel.’

  Charles stood and she turned to see him stride off through the glade and away towards the house.

  ‘I don’t mean you … I don’t mean …’ She broke off. He was out of earshot. ‘You,’ she whispered, watching his back recede.

  She pulled up her drawers, sat down with her back to the willow tree that had supported them through their frantic coupling and burst into tears.

  It was a horrible mess, that was for sure, and she couldn’t sustain it any longer. She would have to go, just take the next train to London and try to pick up her life where she had left it off. In Deverell Hall and its inhabitants she had bitten off very much more than she could chew.

  Perhaps, in time, she could write to Lady Deverell. And as for Charles, well … He only said these things about their future to sweeten her, probably. She couldn’t marry the man whose stepmother was her natural mother. There was bound to be a law against it. All the same, her body and soul conspired against her, making the thought of leaving him almost physically painful and impossible.

  ‘It’s best for him if I do,’ she said out loud. ‘He’ll meet someone more suitable and, and, perhaps so will I in time. No,’ she continued after a moment’s reflection. ‘I’ll never meet anybody else. But that’s fine. More time to read.’

  She wobbled to her feet, dashing the tears from her cheeks with her sleeve, her handkerchief being out of commission. Was there a chance she could get back to the house, pack, change and leave without attracting any unwanted attention?

  She was not sure, but she meant to try it.

  ***

  A movement in the trees, a flash of scarlet, diverted her from her path. She stopped dead, wondering who it could be, and how long they had been there.

  ‘Hello,’ she said uncertainly.

  The figure stepped out from the greenery, revealing Lady Deverell in a bright red skirt and silk blouse. Her lips were the same shade and she parted them in a wide smile.

  ‘Edie,’ she said, more effusively than she might in the ordinary way of things. ‘Taking a little walk by the lake?’

  Edie nodded and smiled weakly back. Her flight would have to be postponed.

  ‘Whatever have you been doing? You’re absolutely filthy. Look at your uniform. The apron’s streaked with … what is that? A grass stain?’

  ‘Oh … I …’

  ‘And your hair.’ Lady Deverell was close enough now to reach out and put a hand over Edie’s half-uncoiled bun. ‘Full of bits of bark. And leaves.’

  ‘I’m sorry,’ she stammered. ‘I’ll go and get changed.’

  ‘Yes, I think you should. And bathed.’ Lady Deverell put up a finger as if a marvellous idea had just occurred to her. ‘But there’s no need for a bath,’ she said. ‘Look at what we have, right here in front of us.’

  ‘I’m sorry?’ Edie was stupid with dread. She was sure Lady Deverell had seen Charles, or – even worse – seen the pair of them together, at it.

  ‘The lake,’ elucidated Lady Deverell, her smile wider than ever. ‘There’s a marvellous spot, just a little further on, where I like to come to bathe. Nobody can see it from the shores – it’s quite sheltered. On a hot day like this, it’s bliss. Come on. Why don’t we?’

  ‘Oh.’

  ‘What? Goodness me, you look absolutely awful, Edie. Are you ill?’

  ‘No, but –’

  ‘Come on then.’

  ‘I can’t swim.’

  Lady Deverell turned back round, cocking her head to one side.

  ‘Of course. London girl, aren’t you? Well, never mind. I’ll teach you. Quickly, then. It isn’t far.’

  Edie’s heart was tight and so was her throat as she followed Lady Deverell’s back along the shore. She knew. She had to know. Or were Edie’s fears causing her to project things that were not there on to Lady Deverell’s manner? Was she, in fact, just being her usual self?

  She hardly knew what to do. Was Lady Deverell inviting her to confess before she performed a humiliating unmasking? Was she supposed to seize the chance to come clean? Would it be better for her if she did? Or should she play it safe and assume that Lady Deverell’s skittish manner was a product of her stressful trip to London? Yes, yes, it could so easily be that. It must be that.

  She would go along with her mistress’s whim and then try to get away as soon as she could after that. And a dip in the lake would actually be rather nice. She felt as seedy as she had ever done in her life.

  ‘Here, now,’ said Lady Deverell, coming to a halt in a little inlet, overhung with weeping willows so that the waters beneath looked quite green. ‘It’s beautifully private and the water will be cool, out of the brightest part of the sunlight.’

  ‘Yes, it’s lovely,’ said Edie.

  Lady Deverell removed her hatpin and, for the briefest of moments, pointed the sharp end in Edie’s direction before putting it, and her straw hat, on the ground. She shook her head, releasing long snakes of rich auburn hair. Here and there, a silver thread broke the glorious colour, but they were scarce enough and, unless the sun was glaring, one would hardly notice them.

  ‘Help me with my clothes, then,’ she said. ‘Honestly, what kind of lady’s maid are you, Edie?’

  Edie stumbled over to her mistress, unsure where to start.

  ‘My blouse,’ hinted Lady Deverell, and Edie set to the buttons with clumsy fingers. ‘How did you get into that state? You smell awful. Never mind,’ she said, apparently taking pity on her mute maid. ‘It’ll all come out in the wash, as they say rather vulgarly.’

  Edie removed the delicate blouse and folded it as carefully as she was able. Lady Deverell’s upper body was revealed in a camisole of silver-grey silk, trimmed with cream lace. Beneath it, her girdle accentuated her full breasts, the rounded flesh spilling from the cups.

  Edie removed Lady Deverell’s skirt next. When she stepped out, Edie was reminded of some magnificent piece of statuary. She could pose for Britannia, she thought, or grace the prow of a ship.

  ‘Are these the legs that launched a thousand pricks?’ said Lady Deverell idly, stretching her long limbs in their silk stockings. ‘Oh.’ She smiled at Edie, the expression never reaching her eyes. ‘I’ve shocked you.’

  ‘Not at all,’ mumbled Edie, placing the skirt beside the blouse on the grass.

  ‘One of my lovers said it, back in the days when I was permitted a little vulgarity. Back in my theatrical days. I had a great many lovers, Edie. Doesn’t that shock you?’

  ‘It is none of my business,’ said Edie.

  ‘Tell me – you’re very pretty. Are you a virgin?’

  Edie’s look of outr
age was not feigned. The question was extremely rude and unexpected.

  ‘Surely not,’ continued Lady Deverell. ‘I don’t believe you can be. Tell me about your lover.’

  ‘Your Ladyship,’ said Edie in a low, pleading voice. ‘I am going back to the house now.’

  ‘You are not.’ Lady Deverell’s easy, teasing manner changed in an instant. ‘Get your clothes off. I’ll deal with my own underwear. You’re coming swimming with me.’

  ‘I’ve told you, I can’t swim.’

  ‘And I’ve told you, I can teach you. Chop chop.’ She clapped her hands, then lifted her camisole over her head.

  Edie’s fingers moved reluctantly to her apron strings, then the buttons of her dress.

  ‘Are you sure nobody can see us?’ she asked, looking around her through the thick greenery.

  ‘Not a soul. I’ve often bathed here naked, especially when I needed to get away from stuffy old Hughie. Which is most of the time.’

  Edie felt a pang of sympathy for Lord Deverell. Try as she might to feel charitable towards her mother, she could not find her likeable. Of course, there were reasons for it – there had to be. She must have been ill-used indeed to have constructed such a hard shell around herself. All the same, Edie could wish that she might try to break through it.

  ‘There now,’ said Lady Deverell, beaming upon Edie’s nudity with a look both benevolent and rapacious. ‘Let’s dip our toes in.’

  Her Ladyship was even more splendid unclothed. Her flesh, dappled by sunlight, was generous and beautifully unmarked by time. She was a little broader about the hips than she might have been in her youth, but she was none the worse for it. Her stature and poise made her seem larger than she was, an Amazon goddess in her natural surroundings. Beside her, Edie felt meagre and plain. It was hardly surprising Charles had wanted to start an affair with her, whatever his motivations. She was simply the most stunning woman Edie had ever seen.

  She followed her mother into the green-tinged water. It was deliciously warm, despite the shade, and the river weed brushed sensuously against her toes, winding its way around them.

  Lady Deverell turned to face her and spread her arms wide, displaying her breasts to their best advantage.

  ‘Isn’t this heaven?’ she exclaimed. ‘The lake, the sun, just you and me, no men to spoil it all.’

  ‘Will Lord Deverell be back today?’ asked Edie.

  Lady Deverell lowered her arms and fidgeted with her hair.

  ‘I don’t think it likely,’ she said.

  ‘I hope Mary will be found.’

  ‘I don’t think that very likely either.’

  The way in which she spoke the words cast a sudden chill over Edie.

  ‘Why … not?’ she asked.

  Lady Deverell’s answering smile twitched at the corners.

  ‘We have quarrelled,’ she said. She waded forward and took Edie’s elbow. ‘Come on. Let’s go deeper.’

  The water lapped around Edie’s knees, then her thighs, finally submerging her to the waist.

  ‘I hope the quarrel was not too serious,’ said Edie in a small, fearful voice.

  ‘Oh, I’m afraid it was. Very serious. I know you’re too polite to ask me what it was about; would you like me to tell you?’

  Edie was not sure. Her heart was pounding wildly and she felt sick. Suddenly it seemed very important that she should get back to the shore.

  ‘Would you?’ Lady Deverell prompted. ‘Perhaps you might like to guess. Go on. Guess.’

  ‘I … can’t.’

  ‘I’m sure you can.’ She wrapped her hand tightly around Edie’s wrist, tightly enough to bruise. ‘Go on.’

  ‘Ow! Charles. Sir Charles,’ she blurted.

  ‘That’s right. Sir Charles. It seems somebody had left my husband an anonymous note in his valise. I wonder if you’d know anything about that?’

  Lady Deverell bent, pushing her face close to Edie’s.

  ‘Heavens, no! I know nothing about a note. I wouldn’t, truly, I would never …’

  ‘Such a little innocent. Such a little slut.’

  A heavy slap landed on Edie’s cheek, stunning her so that she staggered backwards. But Lady Deverell still held on tight with her other hand, making escape impossible.

  Edie looked desperately towards the shore, but the unearthly peace and stillness prevailed.

  ‘I know what you and he have been up to,’ she snarled. ‘Everyone knows.’

  ‘I didn’t mean it,’ said Edie, the words rushing out, wrenched from her by fear. ‘I didn’t mean to. It just happened.’

  ‘It just happened. But you knew what he meant to me, and I suppose you wanted him all to yourself, you little bitch.’

  ‘No,’ sobbed Edie. ‘I didn’t write any note. Please believe me. You must believe me. I wouldn’t do anything to hurt you. I made him break it off with you because I didn’t want you to get hurt …’

  ‘What?’ Lady Deverell almost released her grasp, tightening it at the last minute, just as Edie thought she might slip free. ‘You made him break it off with me? You made him?’

  ‘I was scared Lord Deverell would find out,’ said Edie, and then she could say no more as Lady Deverell kicked her viciously off her feet and assisted the work of gravity by pushing her down beneath the surface of the water.

  She breathed in water and weed, her ears rushing, her vision black with panic. She did everything she could to fight against the other woman’s superior strength, eventually succeeding in cresting the water again, coughing and spluttering so that she thought her lungs might burst.

  ‘You don’t understand,’ she gasped. ‘You’re my mother.’

  At that, Lady Deverell released her grip and fell to her knees on the lakebed. The water was now around her collarbones and she pressed wet hands to her face and moaned.

  ‘No, no, no, it isn’t true. It isn’t true. It can’t be true.’

  ‘It is true,’ said Edie, trying to sound gentle, but she had no control over anything now. ‘My father is Angus Crossland.’

  Slowly, Lady Deverell removed her hands from her face, peeking out at Edie. She looked terrified, like a cornered animal seeking a way out.

  ‘And you have come here to punish me? You have come for your revenge?’

  ‘No. Oh, dear God, no.’

  ‘He sent you? Your father?’

  ‘He does not know I am here.’

  Lady Deverell took several deep breaths, her eyes fixed on the willow canopy above, and Edie seized her opportunity to edge out of her reach.

  ‘I had wondered,’ said Lady Deverell at last. ‘But I did not dare … you do have such a look of me. I did wonder … but I didn’t dare …’ She continued in this vein for a few moments more, as if trying to fix the sense of the words in her head.

  ‘I only wanted to see you,’ said Edie, her eyes filling with tears that she couldn’t check. ‘I only wanted to know you. I never meant you any harm or … anything but goodwill.’

  ‘Your father doesn’t know you’re here?’ repeated Lady Deverell, seeming to be out of her wits and rambling. Edie worried that her latest revelation had tipped her mother’s already fragile mental state over a precipice. Should she have kept quiet? But no! Her life had been threatened.

  ‘Who knows this?’ demanded Lady Deverell. ‘Who have you told?’

  ‘N-nobody,’ said Edie, not wanting to bring the subject of Charles back up.

  ‘But you mean to tell? You mean to tell Lord Deverell, perhaps? You have come here to ruin me.’

  ‘I swear, I have not.’ The tears were falling fast now.

  ‘I will not be ruined. I have everything I came here for – except Charles, and I’ll have him again. He and I, and the Hall, and everything I have lived for. I won’t have it taken from me. I won’t.’

  She advanced upon Edie, who turned to the shore and tried to run through the thick, resistant waters. She stumbled and fell forward into the rich green warmth. She felt a strong hand on her shoulder, pushing h
er down, then the same hand on her head, holding it under the water. She had seen, just for a second, just when she opened her mouth to scream, the flicker of movement in the trees ahead of her, but now all was dark. Roaring darkness, a body that would not work in the way she needed, everything closing in on her, entering her, roaring darkness.

  Chapter Twelve

  She came to and she was not in heaven, nor was she in hell.

  She was lying in some grass, still naked, wet and weed-covered, with a shadow over her. When she opened her eyes, she saw that the shadow belonged to Charles, whose own eyes were wide and face pale. His clothes clung to him, sodden, and his hair was plastered in weeds.

  ‘I did not drown,’ she whispered.

  ‘Not quite,’ he said.

  ‘Where is …?’ Edie tried to sit up and look around her, but Charles hushed her and laid her back down.

  ‘Not terribly gentlemanly but I had to knock her out.’ He nodded a little way further over in the glade. Lady Deverell lay sprawled nearer the lake’s edge.

  ‘Did she mean to …?’

  ‘Kill you? It certainly looked that way from where I was standing.’

  ‘Charles, I think she has gone mad.’

  ‘I don’t care what’s happened to her. Let’s get you somewhere safe.’

  He lifted her into his arms and carried her away from the lake, across the grounds of the Hall.

  Edie was hazily aware of her nudity but too shell-shocked to let it trouble her. She buried her face in Charles’s chest and tried to shut the world out.

  ***

  Once inside the Hall, he gave brusque instructions to one of the footmen to find Kempe and have him drive to fetch the police, then he took Edie to his rooms and laid her on his bed.

  When he seemed to be leaving the room she propped herself up and called after him in dismay, but he had only gone to run her a bath.

  ‘What happened?’ he asked once he had returned and seated himself on the edge of the bed. ‘Why did she do it?’

  ‘I told her she was my mother. She thought I had come here for some kind of revenge. Oh, Charles. What will happen to us all?’

  Charles took her hands.

  ‘I don’t know,’ he said, squeezing them. ‘But I will be by your side, whatever it might be. I love you and I think you love me and that will give us what strength we need. Yes?’