Married But Available

by B. Nyamnjoh

  “With what consequences?” asked Lilly Loveless.

  “She said they have decided to save the marriage because of the children. In their bed is a huge mountain in the middle, with each person in full knowledge of what portion of the bed belongs to whom. They’ve told the children that their staying together is only for their sake. And the children cherish this reality, as they are able to play ping pong with their warring parents. The arrangement has opened up a whole new world for her. One day in the university where she studies, a lecturer of hers said: ‘In Africa where divorce is not looked upon kindly, only adultery saves marriages.’ That same day something developed between her and her classmate. Since then she has had one affair after another, and even when she is out of one, she doesn’t think of reconciliation with her husband who is equally jumping from affair to affair.”

  “The affaired couple,” said Lilly Loveless. “We could come back to your quickie much later, if I feel the need,” she told Britney, and made a note of this in her notebook: ‘Quickie by Britney – unfinished business.’

  “No problem. I could gather additional details in the meantime, to better prepare myself.”

  The waiter arrived just then with a platter of grilled chicken and two plates, but Britney explained she had to get to the bus station for Sawang where she had an appointment, so Lilly Loveless asked that the chicken be wrapped in two separate packages. Britney insisted on lots of chilli pepper to go with her package.

  9

  Lilly Loveless had never seen anything like it. She exclaimed to Britney, “Look how the sun’s morning rays are turning the sand bright black.”

  Britney and Lilly Loveless had spent the night with an aunt of Britney’s whose husband worked with the Mimboland Development Corporation head office in Sakersbeach. They had agreed to begin the day early so they could watch the beach come alive. In the morning, at 5 am, Britney and Lilly Loveless were compelled to join the rest of the family in morning prayers. Britney’s aunt and her husband, who had serious problems with his boss at the office, made them recite over and over again with the family this passage from Proverbs 29:12-13: ‘If a ruler listens to lies, all his officials become wicked. The poor man and the oppressor have this in common, the Lord gives sight to the eyes of both. If a king judges the poor with fairness, his throne will always be secure.’

  That was their breakfast, their early morning prayer. Lilly Loveless and Britney left shortly after, and were indeed the first to arrive at the beach and spread their towels side by side to start the day with liquid pleasures in the company of the sea. Lilly Loveless attached her curls at the back of her head while Britney let her long braids go free. Though it was chilly and even a bit misty still, they smeared themselves with sunscreen, Britney mostly out of curiosity. Lilly Loveless readied her recorder, hoping it would be safe from impetuous grains of sand.

  Britney started: “I know we talked about going beyond sketchy stories, but sometimes you can’t get more.”

  “It’s ok,” replied Lilly Loveless, “let’s hear what you have.”

  ***

  “Magnus, he is a flying-shirt at the University of Mimbo, in his last year, and he’s reading Life Sciences. He says he went out with a girl whom he fell in love with when he was in upper sixth. Before he started dating Bébé, as the girl was fondly called, there was another flying-shirt dating her. As Bébé was dancing to his tune he continued to date her. In the long run, she forgot about the boyfriend she had when she met Magnus. The experience with Bébé was a good one because they shared common feelings of love. Also, Magnus understood her cycle, which she revealed to him. However, to Magnus, Bébé never really understood her menstrual cycle very well.”

  “I smell danger,” remarked Lilly Loveless, noting in passing the currency of high school boys snatching the girlfriends of others.

  “Before long he became aware of some changes in her and their relationship took a different turn. When Magnus asked her if she had noticed what he was noticing, Bébé said no. Even when his friend noticed the same thing and asked her when she last had her period, Bébé would not admit to being pregnant. Either she was manipulating and lying to them, or she didn’t know herself at all. Failing to make her reveal the truth, Magnus swore he wouldn’t accept responsibility if Bébé finally turned round to admit she was pregnant.”

  “How typical!” said Lilly Loveless. “Men, first in, first out.”

  “It was just two weeks before Magnus had to start writing his Advanced Level exams.”

  “Not again,” said Lilly Loveless, thinking of the earlier story between Comfort and Lionel.

  “Things took another turn because Bébé’s parents took her for a test and that is when it was revealed openly that she was seven months pregnant.”

  “Really? Seven months? And she didn’t know?” Lilly Loveless couldn’t believe her ears.

  “Difficult to believe, but true. Bébé stole herself to his place and showed him the hospital book. Magnus was very angry and felt like slapping her but he held his breath and what he could say at that moment was that ‘you feel say na over chop you di chop your belly big so?’

  “She said she was confused and that her father said he wanted to know the boy. Magnus was more confused, as it was barely a week to his ‘A’ level exams. He forced Bébé to keep his identity a secret, and not to talk until he was through with his exams. He even threatened that if she revealed his name and he was locked up, he would come out and kill her and the baby.”

  “Locked up? What for? Is it a crime to get someone pregnant? Is she below the age of sexual consent?” Lilly Loveless looked confused.

  “Parents in Mimboland frown on irresponsible sexual encounters amongst the young, especially when they are not married,” Britney explained. “And the forces of law and order are usually sympathetic to the parents in cases where such encounters result in pregnancy.”

  “Things are different where I come from,” said Lilly Loveless. “But let me not take you away from your story.”

  “Thanks,” Britney said and continued. “Bébé’s parents threatened until she couldn’t but reveal the one responsible. Magnus was in a dilemma. Just four days to his exams Bébé’s father and another man came. He gave them seats and they sat for about 15 minutes without a word. Finally Magnus gathered courage and said, ‘Pa any problem?’ Pa was tapping his legs, took a long breath and finally responded with a question of his own: ‘Do you know this girl?’ Magnus said ‘yes’. ‘You put my daughter the family way and abandon her?’ Bébé’s father was not amused.

  “Finally they reached the hands of the forces of law and order and Magnus was summoned after writing his first paper. He went to the Gendarmes and was bailed by a nephew, who signed a form for Mim$ 500,000.

  “Magnus went to see Bébé and they forged dates, claiming that she started going out with him only after she was pregnant. The idea was to convince the Gendarmes he couldn’t have fathered her pregnancy. It worked. The Gendarmes accepted the forged document and Magnus was freed, much to the surprise of all who had hoped to see him punished for what they knew was his crime.

  “That was how Magnus came out of this trouble, for the pregnancy was his indeed, and he is taking care of the child. At least, as much as a flying-shirt can be said to take care of a child. Sorry I don’t have information on how the child’s mother is doing.”

  Lilly Loveless was happy with Britney’s work. By now the sun was higher in the sky and the day heating up. They each opened a bottle of Mim Wata for a drink. They had been joined on the beach by a voluminous Mboma and a Barbie-like girl who could have been the one just described by Britney. He and the girl sat under one of several of the straw roofed umbrellas lining the beach. They were too far away for Lilly Loveless and Britney to eavesdrop. But the waves were luckier, as they captured the voices of the two and carried away with them into the sea to feed the curiosity of the water spirits.

  ***

  “The next story is short but it shows how you ca
n control not only your girlfriend, but also members of her family,” recommenced Britney. “It is about Lydia, a Form Five student at a government high school. Her parents are rich farmers and her father has a car, second-hand, but a car all the same. Her parents live in the village, but she stays in town with her elder sister who is also a student. Lydia dated her classmate Elvis and she found him interesting. Their relationship was flourishing and Elvis and Lydia were well known by their friends. Elvis had a friend who failed his exams in another school and was transferred to their school to repeat. This friend was so kind that when Lydia asked for money from Elvis, it was this friend who gave it to her.

  “This continued for a long while and Lydia started finding the guy interesting. She visited him often and her interest in him was rising. She could not stop thinking of Elvis’ friend. He kept on appearing in her dreams. Her interest in Elvis was diminishing. At times she visited his friend at odd hours. One day it happened unconsciously that they found themselves in each other’s arms. It was what she had imagined and wished for long. The relationship boomed, Elvis suspected them, and spoke to them, but Lydia couldn’t afford to give up on Elvis’ friend, especially as he was rich and generous. He was not the type to make a girl complain as often as she heard others do: ‘Wat kana boy be dis? You give girl mimbo and you finish drink-am you sep sep? Dis kana boy sep, ye fit give girl how much?’ Finally, Elvis, being the simple flying-shirt that he was, gave up and took his distance from them. Lydia welcomed his decision.

  “Lydia and Elvis’ friend went on kissing and caressing in school and around town. Her elder sister hated the guy and never wanted to see them together. Lydia and the guy didn’t care. They continued to enjoy life, spending most of their weekends in nightclubs and other entertainment attractions in town. Finally, Lydia got pregnant.”

  “Not an infrequent occurrence in the stories you’ve gathered,” remarked Lilly Loveless.

  “Not at all,” Britney agreed. “Pregnancies and STDs are common, and to be expected. What goes around comes around. As concerned Lydia, her parents had invested much hope in her. She was confused and didn’t know where to seek help. She could only tell her closest friend who finally arranged with a traditional doctor for some concoctions to do away with the foetus. This was paid for by Elvis’ friend. Unfortunately for Lydia, her best friend went quietly behind her back and told her elder sister. Her sister talked to her but Lydia was headstrong. She could not afford to miss the one she loved. Finally, she and the guy convinced her elder sister to see that we are in modern times and a girl of Lydia’s age is supposed to have a boyfriend. What they actually did was to use money to soften the elder sister. This guy bought presents for her.”

  “Really?” asked Lilly Loveless rhetorically. “Money sure does talk.”

  “If you’ve got it, you can get what you want, some think.”

  By now, the beach was spread pell-mell with towels and sunbathers and small groups of people chatting and chattering away effortlessly. Hawkers had started to show up to propose a host of handmade objects, condoms and other items to the emerging beach consumer community. Lilly Loveless put her recorder into the pocket of her shorts, and with Britney took a break, walking awhile along the water’s edge.

  When they returned to their towels, two handsome Mimbolanders had situated theirs strategically close. Britney explained that she had just one more story to recount and Lilly Loveless suggested they seek shelter under one of the umbrellas. They collected their towels and their Mim-Wata bottles and resettled, much to the displeasure of the two invaders. They sat for a moment to appreciate the ebb and flow of the sea. Then Britney began, fidgeting with the end of one of her braids.

  ***

  “Valérie is a girl of 19. She is from a peasant family. Her father died when she was in Form Three, but her mother sees to it that she attains a certain level of education. Valérie is presently in Form Five in a Catholic school. Her first date was when she was in Form Four and it didn’t last long because the guy gave her little money. She stayed alone for about a month to make a good choice about who could afford her needs. An opportunity came when she knew a certain medical doctor. This doctor was a family friend to her younger sister, who was already married. At first it was known to the public as an issue of family friend, but Valérie was actually dating and even staying with him.

  “Valérie says the doctor is married but his wife is abroad, so she is in sole control of the house. At times she spent about three months in his house, where he lived together with his two younger brothers. Valérie says she feels happy because she enjoys facilities in that house which are not in their house and more important is the fact that she is dating a whole medical doctor.”

  “Prestige?” queried Lilly Loveless.

  “That’s how she sees it, as prestige. And she is probably right. Doctors are not as cheap and affordable as groundnuts, are they?”

  “I bet not.”

  “Valérie says she faces no problem back at home. The doctor comes into the house and fetches her at anytime without her mother getting irritated. At times her mom prepares food for them and when he comes in her elder brother greets the doctor and discusses with him in ways that suggest he uses his sister to buy favours from the doctor. Valérie says she loves the doctor very much and prefers spending time in his place to spending time in their house. She says they have a lot of fun and the doctor even tried to teach her how to smoke but she has gone only so far as to light a cigarette. She doesn’t really warm up to it, having read somewhere that if you want to die of smoking, start young and keep on at it.”

  “She seems to have found her Mr Right, has she?”

  “Far from it! Mr Right Now, perhaps. All is not rosy for Valérie.”

  “Complicated, affairs! Hope things don’t get too bad for her,” interjected Lilly Loveless.

  “Well, she is facing numerous problems, mostly what we call ‘congosai.’”

  “Congosai?”

  “Yes, her name and the name of her family are the topics of the day in that locality. Valérie says people are talking much about her, saying that she is dating a man who cannot abandon his wife to marry her. She says ‘Na jealousy’. Her mother finally complains that she is tired of so much gossiping. At one time people say she has given her daughter in marriage but she ignores them and what she says is that ‘make all man born pikin.’”

  “Meaning?”

  “Everyone should have the opportunity to mother a child, I think,” replied Britney. “But it could also mean that only parents know how difficult controlling a child can be… Sorry I took the statement for granted.”

  “We all do,” Lilly Loveless reassured her. “You don’t want to keep interrupting the interviewee the way I do with you – which is different because you are my research assistant. But you mustn’t hesitate to ask questions or seek clarifications. It is true that many informants simply don’t have the patience for scientific ways of finding out, and that since we are usually begging them to help us out with answers to our research questions, we can’t be choosers. Yet with a bit of skill, you’d be amazed by how much information people are able to share with you, even when they start off being reluctant to open up. Of course, some ambiguities and incomprehension are bound to creep into the data you collect, but devising and mastering techniques for getting as much as possible out of those we interview, should guarantee satisfactory results.” Following this very inspired pronouncement, Lilly Loveless asked Britney to hold on so she could record for future reference in her notebook, what she had just said.

  “Valérie does not only face problems with the society, she also faces a problem with other girls dating her doctor, and using every dirty trick in the book to win him over.”

  “Oh my goodness,” Lilly Loveless shook her head as if that could ward off what had already happened.

  “Valérie had a bitter experience with a woman, her teacher Mrs Fidelis, who was also dating the doctor.”

  “Her teacher?!”
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br />   “Yes, one day this woman came to the doctor’s house and looked at Valérie from head to toe, with contempt. Valérie told the doctor that if he ate the food the woman brought, she would never cook food for him again. He actually ate the food without hesitating.”

  “A slap in the face for Valérie,” said Lilly Loveless.

  “And Valérie is used to him doing naughty things. Also he brings his girlfriends with him to the master’s bedroom, while Valérie goes to the guestroom.

  “Valérie says: ‘I can’t leave the doctor, firstly because he supplies me with my needs and for me to date a doctor is prestige.’”

  “She certainly knows what she wants,” Lilly Loveless interjected again.

  “Valérie says she has been pregnant once by the doctor but they dealt away with the baby. And life continued.”

  “Amazing,” said Lilly Loveless. “Let me get you right, the medical doctor dealt away with the pregnancy by an abortion?”

  “Yes, and life goes on.”

  “Is life going on for both of them?”

  “She feels very free with him. Her major problem is that she performs poorly at school because she spends too much time at the doctor’s place. Sometimes she feels like abandoning school. She does not want anything to disturb her head.

  “One day recently, he made the mistake of taking Mrs Fidelis into his room and then calling for Valérie, apparently for a bit of fun. So shocked, the two of them must have been infused with adrenaline to succeed in quartering him to the four bedposts with clothes from his closet and hightailing out of the house, abandoning him there until his brothers would arrive home. Valérie went crying to her mother and I don’t know whether she will go back to the doctor’s or not.”