Honeywood Settlement

by Creswell, H. B.

  The position of affairs is perfectly intolerable and beyond all I do not precisely know what my rights are, and I apprehend that since my architect is in the opposite camp it is not to be anticipated that he will exactly inform me of them; is beyond the bounds of credulity that I am to be subjected to these persistent annoyances and refractory oppositions power to extricate myself; and unless my architect and his builder immediately bestir themselves to make this house a human domicile instead of a lethal chamber for cats and dogs, I shall exercise my own resources and employ others who can be depended on to carry out what they engage to perform. My eventual demands on Grigblay for compensation are a matter for contingent consideration.

  Yours faithfully,

  Brash is certainly deserving of sympathy, for he is gloriously unaware that the whole of the trouble is due to his wife’s interferences; he also, I think, deserves sympathy in that his manful effort at self-control has not proved equal to the length of his letter; but most of our sympathy must lie with Spinlove, who has the task of answering the letter.

  SPINLOVE HITS BACK

  SPINLOVE TO RUSS AND CO., SOLICITORS

  Dear Sirs, 4.12.26.

  I enclose copy of letter I have received from Sir Leslie Brash, and also a copy of that to which it is a reply. As your client, by objecting to my style, appears to require me to answer him in his own, I am replying to you. It was a great shock to me to get his letter, as no doubt he intended since it is the result of ten days’ reflection; and what his immediate more “forcible rejoinder” would have been I do not know, for such studied misrepresentation and abuse must need deep thought.

  You are acquainted with the facts of the Riddoppo dispute, and will be able to point out to your client that I was right in advising him not to use the paint; right in supporting Mr. Grigblay’s objection to using it; and right in saying Mr. Grigblay could not be held responsible for the failure-which was also Counsel’s opinion and is your own view. Further, that it is a mere quibble to say I took sides with the builder; that if your client, at any point in the dispute, had acted on my advice he would have saved himself wasted trouble and expense; and that everything I have done has been in his interests, which, if I had acted differently, would not have been the case. The truth is that what your client resents is my being right and he wrong.

  You will also be able to explain to your client that the “profits” and “fees” charged in the Statement of Account are according to custom; that every detail of the account has been audited by the Quantity Surveyor, Mr. Tinge, after authorization by me, according to the stipulations of the contract; and you can remind him that I offered to explain any points upon which he was not satisfied.

  I enclose copy of the official Scale of Charges issued by the Royal Institute of British Architects, so that you will be able to show your client that my charges are in accordance with it except where they are less. I find, however, that I omitted certain services for which I am entitled to additional fees: I enclose amended account in substitution for that sly sent in error.

  With regard to the leakage of coke fumes, you will be able to tell your client that his ardour in abusing me for what is no one’s fault but his own, outruns discretion unless he can explain: (1)—how his household has been “continuously tormented by disgusting effluviums ever since the house was occupied,” when no one but Lady Brash was able to detect any smell at all, and the furnace that caused it was out of use for more than six months, and (2)—in what way I was guilty, also “continuously,” of “elusive dilatory procrastination” for giving assurances that there was nothing wrong with the drains, when there was nothing wrong, or in failing to recognize a smell which it required the services of a chemist to determine.

  The facts are, as your client knows, that early in the year it was suspected something was wrong with the drains. The builder investigated and found unsanitary conditions due to neglect to keep traps clear. The drains were subsequently proved sound, and there were no more complaints of smells till the 10th October. An indeterminate stuffy smell was then noticed, and at my instigation a consulting chemist was called in who, four weeks ago, reported fumes from coke fires. My dilatoriness has since then consisted in determining what and where the defect was, and in getting the work opened up. In this I have been delayed fifteen days by your client’s prohibiting the builder from entering the house, and by the refusal of the builder to make good until your client accepted responsibility for the defect, which is revealed to be a hole knocked in the flue by a chimney-sweep employed by your client, and who eluded the foreman after being told not to touch the flues. You will, therefore, be able to point out to your client that he has misstated many facts perfectly well known to him, and that he alone is responsible for any annoyance he has suffered.

  In this letter I have tried to confine myself to the business of settling up; but as Mr. Grigblay cannot answer for himself and my silence might imply acceptance of the aspersions on him, I wish to say that Mr. Grigblay has from first to last done his duty—and more than his duty; that he is a scrupulously honourable and self-respecting man and a conscientious and capable builder; that the whole of the trouble during the past months has been made by your client; and that Mr. Grigblay has far more cause for grievance against the building owner than the building owner has against him.

  You will note that your client has had the forethought to write in his own hand so as to escape the consequences of libel—a most wise precaution. It may be, however, that his sense of obligations is not entirely regulated by fear of legal proceedings, and therefore, although he has made it impossible for me to enforce a withdrawal and apology, I will nevertheless pay him the compliment of demanding both.

  Yours faithfully,

  We have noticed before that the highly temperamental Spinlove has a bit of the Old Adam in his make-up. Like other temperamental persons, he becomes a different being under different circumstances, and it is this that explains the exuberant folly of some of his letters, the stiff-necked superciliousness of others and the passionate resentment he sometimes, as here, displays. He must have had the devil at his elbow when he wrote and rewrote and polished up and altered the first typescript of the above, for. It is clear he could not have produced the thing off-hand. The stored depths of bitterness it reveals are dreadful, and it is the sort of letter that may be said to be scarcely ever written, for those who are capable of writing them know better than to indulge themselves. The arresting thing about the letter is the deliberate uprooting of the plant Spinlove has been tending for two years with such solicitude, and the discarding of Brash’s esteem and friendly offices just when they were ripe for garnering. This seems inexplicable; for if Spinlove were characteristically unable to control his temper he could not have arrived at the position he has reached. The only explanation that seems possible is that there are matters affecting the relationship of Brash and his architect which this correspondence has not revealed.

  The wild folly of Spinlove’s action does not, however, prevent us from admiring his courage in writing the letter, and there is a manly disregard of consequences which shows him to be of finer metal than we have hitherto had reason to suppose. That the letter is not quite fair to Brash is of no consequence: the only impediment at the prospect of Brash’s reading it is that Spinlove is but little over thirty and Brash is advanced in middle age—for I imagine Grigblay’s “old gentleman” to be no indication of senility, but provoked by a humorous perception of frontal luxuriance, tight boots, and similar abnegations of youth.

  We also may sympathize with Spinlove. In what way ought he to have replied to Brash’s outrageous letter? It is a very difficult question. He might, of course, have flattered Brash into reason by being submissive, giving a diplomatic answer to the various complaints, appealing for a more tolerant view of the facts and a recognition of what was due to himself; or he might have risked a letter of passionate protest, such as in early days Brash once provoked from him; but he could scarcely have don either except
at the loss of his own self-respect and his claim on Brash’s—and why should he make any surrender whatever?

  When a letter is written under a genuine misapprehension and without any intention of offensiveness, a diplomatic answer removes the misapprehension and prostrates the offender with the realization of his transgression; but when, as in Brash’s case, is a deliberate intention to affront, and facts are wilfully here distorted to bolster abuse, the problem is how best to hit back, and to hit back with effect, for it is easy for the hitter to do more to himself than to his adversary—as, indeed, Spinlove seems here to have done. Spinlove must have been tormented with the difficulties of his task before he struck the happy idea of addressing his reply to Russ; and if he had written coldly instead of with feeling, made no attempt at retort, and suggested the expedience of an apology without appearing to care whether it were conceded or not, he would probably have hit Brash the harder and disarmed him of the deeper grievance he has now given him cause to feel. The things that will hurt Brash are—Spinlove’s disdaining to reply to him; Russ’s seeing the letters; and the humiliation of being told that his various grievances are without foundation and that he is wrong and Spinlove right. Spinlove’s sarcasms were not necessary, and may be expected to do him more harm than they will Brash.

  A FRIEND IN NEED

  MISS PHYLLIS BRASH TO SPINLOVE

  Dear Jazz, 7.12.26.

  What have you been doing to Dad? He is utterly furious with you and I am afraid he is going to see Mr. Russ to-day. Why do you make all this trouble? It was never like this when the house was being built, and afterwards he was so blown out and pleased with everything-but now everything is horrid. He shouted to-day—he hardly ever does that. Do please have a reconcilly, or I don’t know what will happen. Why is not the flue put right?

  Yours,

  P.

  P.S.—Mum comes home to-morrow, in spite of all cold and comfortless. She took the leap at Brighton-not into the sea but into a psycho-merchant’s bosom, and Aunt G. says it has done her good already.

  SPINLOVE TO MISS PHYLLIS BRASH

  Solemnly, it is not my fault. I am most terribly sorry about it and would do anything to have a reconcilly, but he wrote me a most horrible letter; abusive and misrepresenting all the facts -not troubling to understand them, and actually insulting. I could not possibly take it lying down and did not know how to answer without making matters worse; so, as he proposed to refer matters to Russ, I replied to Russ. I suppose this has upset him, but Russ will put things right, I am sure. The flue will be patched up directly the word is given. I can do no more.

  RUSS TO SPINLOVE

  Dear Sir, 9.12.26.

  On receipt of your letter and enclosures we communicated with our client who has since called to see us and has instructed us to say that his letter to you of 2nd November was written under a misapprehension as to certain facts. He now realizes that his criticisms of your conduct were not justified, and he withdraws them and expresses his regret that he made them.

  We shall be glad if you will make an appointment with Mr. Russ at this office on an early day for the purpose of explaining one or two matters arising out of the Statement of Account, and your own charges.

  We have also to direct you to instruct the builder to make the necessary alterations to the flue at the earliest moment, and to inform us directly you know definitely the date when the work will be completed.

  Yours faithfully,

  It will be noticed that, by ignoring Spinlove’s violence, Russ’s formal letter conveys a more effective rebuke than any retort or comment would be likely to do. Russ has evidently persuaded Brash to a more reasonable state of mind.

  SPINLOVE TO MISS PHYLLIS BRASH

  10.12.26.

  Since you rang up this morning a letter has come from Russ which puts everything right so far as business is concerned—apology and everything. Will you keep a lookout to-morrow morning and let me know how thingys are at your end, as I am writing him a really nice letter that I hope will put everything right. Excuse typewriter.

  For “him” I read “your Father.”

  SPINLOVE TO RUSS AND CO.

  Dear Sirs, 10.12.26.

  I am much obliged for your letter and gladly accept without reserve Sir Leslie Brash’s withdrawal and apology. Of course, I was bound to ask for it.

  I will call and see Mr. Russ at 11 on Thursday if that will be convenient to him.

  I have arranged by telephone with the builder to put the repairs to flue in hand at once. They will be finished next week, and there is no reason why the furnace should not be lighted on Friday.

  Yours faithfully,

  In writing “Of course, I was bound to ask him for it” Spinlove raises a doubt whether he was justified in asking, and disparages both the apology and Brash’s wisdom in conceding it.

  SPINLOVE TO BRASH

  Dear Sir Leslie Brash, 10.12.26.

  I have to-day received a most satisfactory letter from Mr. Russ which I have, of course, suitably acknowledged; but I am impelled to thank you and to tell you the great pleasure I received from the message he sends from you. I do hope that everything is now all right between us. I was in great difficulties when I received your letter as it was really altogether “too rather,” as Phyllis says, and misrepresented the facts in such an extraordinary way that I could not trust myself to reply direct; and as you had threatened to call me to account with Mr. Russ I thought the best thing would be to take the bull by the horns (I am not referring to you, of course) and see if that would do any good—as it has, I am thankful to say.

  I have arranged with Grigblay to get on with the flue, and you will -be glad to know that he will definitely finish the work next week and that you will be able to light the furnace on Friday, certain. I understand you agree that the damage was caused by the sweep Lady Brash employed, and that no question will be raised on the point after the work is restored. As you know, Grigblay refuses to touch the flue except on the understanding that you accept responsibility for the damage.

  With kind regards and best wishes,

  Yours very sincerely,

  So this is Spinlove’s idea of a “really nice letter”! He would have been entirely right in telling Brash he received his message with great pleasure and accepted it fully and without reserve, and a light comment on some remote subject to show the quarrel as over and out of mind; but he appears—as usual—to have written out of the feelings of the moment without any regard for the effect of his word, which will open every wound that Brash’s vanity has suffered in his interview with Russ.

  MISS PHYLLIS BRASH TO SPINLOVE

  Dear Jazz, 11.12.26.

  I spotted your screed at breakfast this morning, but I do not think Dad is going to wear it next his heart immediately. He put it back in the envelope after he had read it, and said nothing, but he lobstered—he does that sometimes; not anger—sort of bashfulness, don’tcherknow? What was it you said to make him? Mum is wonderful, but, odds architects and builders, when are we going to have the heat on? The whole household is suffering terribly from a chilblain on Mum’s little finger. She is writing to you. It’s all right.

  Yours,

  P.

  Mem: Go and get psychoed.

  SPINLOVE TO GRIGBLAY

  Dear Sir, 17.12.26.

  I kept an appointment with Mr. Russ, Sir Leslie Brash’s agent, yesterday, and am glad to tell you that there is no intention against you for the Riddoppo failure. The matter has been dropped and all suggestions that you were in any way responsible withdrawn.

  I enclose certificate for £1,242 11s. 9d. being final balance due under the contract as shown in the Statement of Account. The account for restoring the flue, including analyst’s fee, should be rendered separately.

  Yours faithfully,

  BRASH TO SPINLOVE

  Dear Mr. Spinlove, 13.12.26.

  I am gratified by, your intimation that you have received and fittingly acknowledged a communication from Mr. Russ, and that
that communication meets with your approval.

  The matter you refer to as in dispute between us is I apprehend anent the furnace flue; in which it appears we are eventually in agreement and I accordingly observe with satisfaction that you have succeeded in obtaining Mr. Grigblay’s consent to undertake the work, as the result of his protracted decision in this matter has been of interest to us for a considerable time.

  I suffer, I apprehend, from a certain unavoidable confusion of mind anent the various building operations which Mr. Grigblay objects to perform, and anent those others for which he refuses to take responsibility; but any compliances on his part which offer expectations that we will shortly see the last of him are most welcome.

  Yours faithfully,

  Brash is sulky. Spinlove has won!

  THE CAT JUMPS

  LADY BRASH TO SPINLOVE

  My dear Mr. Spinlove,13.12.26.

  Here I am again you will see, after a most enjoyable stay at Brighton with my sister, but all the time I wished I was at home which rather spoilt my visit in spite of not having a dreadful chilblain when I was there.

  First about the heat. Leslie says it will never be finished, but the men are at work now so will you tell them to be a little quicker. There, I knew I had forgotten something. I nearly wrote to you from Brighton but it is so much easier when one is closer. Mrs. Cooper tells me they are all the rage just now but of course only young people do it in public and I should never dream though Phyllis always does. Now what would it, all cost? I should like it on the roof so as to be near the sun, and down and all closed in to make it invisible, so will you tell me and then I will ask Leslie.